Things you just don't "get."

[ER]

Had a discussion today in the car coming back from upp nawth, of exactly why it's true that when a snake falls in love with a garden hose it's time to buy a new pair of boots. I just don't get that saying at all but we did try to break it down.

I took the philosophical position (you can't walk in the same river twice) and my passenger more an irreverent one that went where it shouldn't go (it's all metaphor, don't you get that?), but but since we parked under a willow tree waving in the autumn breeze all was well until we went inside and found out someone had smashed a Hershey bar (not a metaphor) on the steps and did not clean it up, and I figured someone was going to slip, so I had to go for paper towels, those miracles of the modern age, and put it right, but I still don't get that about boots and garden hoses and snakes.

[indianasmith]

It's simple, really.
If a snake falls in love with a garden hose, he obviously has blurry vision.
Therefore he's more inclined to strike at a perceived threat.
Hence you want some thick, new, high-topped boots.

[ER]

It's simple, really.
If a snake falls in love with a garden hose, he obviously has blurry vision.
Therefore he's more inclined to strike at a perceived threat.
Hence you want some thick, new, high-topped boots.

Your wisdom knows no bounds.

[Paquita]

Why people seem to hate dark stained wood so much and love white and grey paint.  I love dark wood and hate that all the woodwork, trim baseboards, etc. in my house are painted white.  I am going room by room and replacing it all with stained wood where I can, but it’s such a huge undertaking and I’m imagining if I ever want to sell  my house, the realtor is probably going to try to talk us into painting it all white again to appeal to buyers.  I see all these DIY things where they take some beautiful old antique furniture and paint it a solid color and call it an upgrade.  I always like the “before” pictures better.

Another thing bugging me is why people who use MS Excel don’t freeze the panes so you can see the column and row headers as you scroll through a giant spreadsheet.  I get it if you are new to computers, but once you realize what this is and how it works, you should always use it.  I hate watching people scroll back and forth to look at the headers again…  and then complain that excel is so hard to work with and act like I’m some kind of brain wonder for being able to use it.  People that do this while presenting from excel should be committed.  I need to get out of office work :).

[Alex]

Where possible in our house our furnishings are dark wood. Always loved that.

[Trevor]

It's simple, really.
If a snake falls in love with a garden hose, he obviously has blurry vision.
Therefore he's more inclined to strike at a perceived threat.
Hence you want some thick, new, high-topped boots.

I just bought a new garden hose so I better be careful 

[Trevor]

I never get clean undies from the laundry 

[ER]

This bit of wit:

If you want to know if a cat is a boy or a girl, call it over. If he comes it's a boy, and if she comes it's a girl.

What-am-I-not-getting? It's as bad as fish sticks, man!

[LilCerberus]

The way people get when approaching toll plazas, particularly the smart tag lanes.....

The speed limit drops by ten miles an hour, and yet everybody starts to floor it for no reason, and the lanes start to spread out & multiply, so there's no need for them to cluster up & start tailgating everybody else, yet they do.....

Then you pass under those sensors, the freeway shrinks back down & the speed limit goes back up, and suddenly all these leadfooted maniacs start driving normal again for some reason...........................

[VenomX73]

politics 

[chefzombie]

stock market paranoia

[claws]

I don't get how a thermos can keep things warm and cold. And nope, I haven't googled yet.

[Alex]

I don't get how a thermos can keep things warm and cold. And nope, I haven't googled yet.

Physics.

[ER]

How people in Regina, Saskatchewan keep from laughing every time they say their city's name.

[LilCerberus]

How people in Regina, Saskatchewan keep from laughing every time they say their city's name.

There's a town across the river from me named Varina...