Who Would Make The Worst Ninja?

[No Nukes, The Satanic Pikachu]

I know Freddy Kruger would make one bad-ass Ninja...he's got all the techniques down pat. I'm talking about what movie slasher would make the down-and-out, absolute WORST Ninja of all time!

Michael Myers: He's deadly and silent all right, but he's just. too. slow. And in recent years, he's gotten a tad clumsy too. Next.

Jason Voorhees: Forget it. It ain't happening. For Christ's sake, he's always breaking stuff just for the sake of breaking it. He makes Vegeta on a bad day look like a 6-week-old-baby having a fit. "Stealth" is not in this man's vocabulary. Next.

Hannibal Lector: Ha! You've got to be joking. You could pick him out of a whole crowd of Ninja-he'd be the one with the stylish navy outfit with turquoise trim. The rest of the clan would boot him out in a hurry after they found out he took the "pleasure" of redecorating thier dojo while they were out. But he'd just come back and eat them all anyway.

Leatherface: After the first blood-curling "YEEEEEEEEEEE-HAWWWWW" accompanied by the chainsaw buzz of doom, they'd most likely jump-kick him to Mars. Damn that would be annoying, going all that way for some authentic Japanese food and gettin' sent to space instead.

Leprechaun: They wouldn't be able to find a Ninja robe small enough for him. Yet.

Chucky: He's just too much of an impatient bastard. It was his fooling with magic that got him turned into a doll in the first place. He's had no luck being a sorceror, he's definitely gonna suck at being a ninja.

IT: Ninja clown? Forgeddaboutit.

[systemcr4sh]

the leprechaun would be a crazy ninja, well, crazily funny anyway.

What about  leatherface would make a decent ninja, just instead of nunchucks he could tie two chainsaws together. now i'd pay to see that!

-Dan

[john]

What about the Tall Man from Phantasm?

[BlackAngel]

Steven Q. Urkel
4 words: "Did I do that?"

The Ladies' Man
He's too busy throwing pick up lines than ninja stars


Stuart Little
You think the Leperchan is bad, try to find a suit for this guy.

[BlackAngel]

Steve Irwin a.k.a. the Crocodile Hunter
Acutally, he would be a good ninja if he didn't look like he was breast fed coffee.

Robocop
Somehow, I don't think being a silent assassin would be affective if he's 400 to 500lbs of hard metal and yelling "Drop it!"

Beetlejuice
Ahc!  The smell alone...

Calista Flockheart
No, No, I take it back.  She can make a good ninja.  With her size and shape, she can squeeze into a small crack on the wall, or go through a chain-linked fence without having to cut a hole.  Also a good choice, Lara Flynn Boyle.

[Steven Millan]

                  That's enough talk about ninja casting that'll heavily water menachem Golan's mouth in yearning to make a new ninja movie(with Hong Kong-style fight sequences,of course....a trend that mainstream Hollywood is happily ripping off,and making overly-trendy,but is not doing a very good job at ; ala "Charlie's Angels" , the upcoming "Daredevil",and Quentin Tarantino's upcoming "Kill Bill"(the outrageous splatter kills will save that film,of course).

[Flangepart]

Peewee Herman. If the silly laugh at his own sneakyness diden't give him away, the red and white bike would.

[mr. henry]

mr. bean...he'd snuff himself with his own weapons. teddy bear sidekick with stare-of-death.

regis philbun..."IS THIS YOUR FINAL BREATH?" (his ninja catch-phrase). sidekick kelly in bikini (this would be good tho).

tom green...weapon of choice: doody on a micorphone. sidekick glenn with gut of power.

-mr. henry
(let's list our puny sites...
www.310am.com)

[Lee]

Jimmy Carter!!! The poor bastard can't even walk down stairs!

[Dan_I'm_The_Man]

Jay-Lousy ninja.  He cannot shut up!  And God forbid he's sneaking around and sees a girl undressing.  That's it, it would be all over for him!

Silent Bob-Badass ninja!  He just needs to drop a few pounds.

[Law Dog]

Jabba the Hutt - A big ninja slug going huh huh huh, now that's bad.