"Ballistic..." Mm-mm! I Smells Me A Turkey!!

[Squishy]

(1) The title. "Ballistic" itself is okay, even if it sounds like the last unused "one-word action-movie title" from the '80s. But "Ecks vs. Sever?" Meesa sorries--ECKS? SEVER? Go to hell.
(2) Antonio. And it isn't a "Spy Kids" movie. Uh-oh, warning klaxons going off everywhere! Antonio Banderas' best performance of late was when he complained that older women are having trouble finding roles--at which point he compared his wife, Melanie Griffith, to JESSICA LANGE. With a straight face he did this.
(3) Lucy. You've had your fifteen minutes, okay? And that was very, very generous in my opinion. Give someone with a little talent a chance.
(4) Ray Park. AKA "Toad." AKA, um, what's-his-name--you know, that short ugly doofus from "The Phantom Menace." What was his character's name again? Darth Noh? Darth Poo? Darth Flash-In-The-Pan? Darth Overrated? Aw, even the pimply fanboys who were worshipping his droppings three years ago don't care.
(5) Writer Peter Lenkov gave us Pauly Shore's "Son-In-Law," "Demolition Man," and "Universal Soldier II." And "III." Wouldn't one normally be deported, or shot, for doing things like that?
(6) Co-author Alan McElroy also wrote "Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers," "Wheels of Terror," "Spawn," and "Left Behind: The Movie." Excuse me, I have to go throw up now.
(7) Thai director Wych Kaosayananda (directing his first US film) calls himself "Kaos" for short. Excuse me, I have to go throw up again. Thou shalt not suffer a Wych to live.
(8) Executive producer: Andrew Stevens!

Oh, baby, this CAN'T be good...

[Akira Tubo]

I smell an attempt at a franchise.

[Flangepart]

Maby i'm liveing too clean a life. What is this thing? Neo-bond, XXX wanna be, perhaps?

[XxSilverHxX]

Man if they have the chick "sever" i think beat Ecks that will suck.

[John]

>Oh, baby, this CAN'T be good...

 What do you expect for a video game inspired movie?

[J.R.]

I think it has promise. When I first saw the trailer I thought it looked like one of those hyperkinetic Japanese or French action imports, then when I saw that it was American I thought, "Hmm, seems like we're catching on." Remember, not too many had high hopes for The Matrix. "Looks like Johnny Mnemonic 2,", I remember musing.