"Metalstorm" - The destruction of my sanity

[Fearless Freep]

OK, I finsihed up watching "Metalstorm: The destruction of Jared-Syn" and I had some thoughts

First off..why did I try to watch this last night after coming up from "The Two Towers" . The congnitive dissonance set up by trying  to rationalize that two such movies could exist in the same universe...

OK, seriously..


1) Tim Thomerson - why did his career never really go anywhere?  I mean he's been in a lot of stuff, but never really "A" material.  A shame because all the cheese I've seen him in, he usually out-acts everyone around him.  Watching him mouth of to Richard Moll was almost worth seeing this movie for.

Actually Richard Moll also out acted most of the rest of the cast as well.  The two main characters were pretty wooden in trying to overact, and Micheal Preston (Pappagalo from "Road Warrior") just liked silly and embarrased.  For what it's worth Baal looked like the ugly mutant brother of RedEye from "Oblivion"

2) What is going on!?!? - A lot of this movie just goes unexplained, and is pretty incomprehensible.  The master crystal, the connection between Dogen and Dhyana that's supposed to make him so strong.  How did Jared-Syn just vanish and end up fleeing on some sort of air-scooter, and how did Dogan know?  Things kept coming up in the movie that you got the feeling were supposed to have been explained in an earlier scene *that never happened*.  The out-of-body experience from the magic mask was another one.  This whole thing had one plot but three stories that were randomly combined.  I can forgive a movie for being ridiculous, but this one never closed enough loops to even be evaulated for such criteria

3) The title.  "The Destruction of Jared-Syn" Ok, Jared-Syn's our bad guy, guess we know where this is going...but wait, in the end Jared-Syn just disappears.  So the title gives away the ending..but is a lie.

Folks, this one is pretty bad.    It comes very close to looking like Charles Band ripping of the Italians ripping of Mad Max; let that sink in.  The special effects and production were such that I kinda expected this to have a mid-70s release date, but it was 1983...woah

[nshumate]

Fearless Freep wrote:
>
> Actually Richard Moll also out acted most of the rest of the
> cast as well.  

Interesting trivia:  It was while Moll had his head shaved for this role that he auditioned for the part of "Bull" on Night Court.

[Fearless Freep]

It was while Moll had his head shaved for this role that he auditioned for the part of "Bull" on Night Court

I didn't know that.

I always thought Richard Moll weas an under-rated actor.  In Metalstorm and the other movies I've seen him in, he usually seems to play some big imposing baddie but he usually seems to try to interject a little depth, and even humour when possible.

[Chris K.]

Of course, you have to realize that METALSTORM: THE DESTRUCTION OF JARED-SYN was made in the brief period of the 3-D craze and was intended to be just that, at least by it's distributor/backer Universal Pictures.

At that time, producer/director Charles Band made the 3-D film PARASITE (1981) for Embassy Pictures on a budget of $800,000. The total gross in the box office: $7 million. Not bad for a low budget 3-D pic and $7 mil was quite a bit back then. Because of that, Charlie had an element (i.e., 3-D) that he could now use since the craze was on.

With backing from his father's production company Albert Band International Productions and Universal Pictures, METALSTORM: THE DESTRUCTION OF JARED-SYN was prepared and shot in the 3-D process. The film was heavily piggybacked by Universal and did a good job in the box office. But after that, the 3-D craze ended quite quickly.

METALSTORM: THE DESTRUCTION OF JARED-SYN is actually very entertaining and the effects work is still good (hey, it beats that CGI crap any day of the week). And Richard Moll is a very good performer and if you want to see him in a better character role take a look at THE DUNGEONMASTER (1984), which is another Charlie Band produced film only better than METALSTORM. As for story of METALSTORM, sadly it was not too good in that department and could have been more enhanced (but then, this was a 3-D film after all). And as for the title, it's said that Universal demanded "The Destruction of Jared-Syn" on the credits of the title so you know who to blame.

I will say that Charlie Band has produced better films during his theatrical days of the 1980's (i.e., RE-ANIMATOR, FROM BEYOND, ZONE TROOPERS, etc.), but I will also admit that METALSTORM was not too bad and could have been so much better.

[Chadzilla]

Well, one or too good things to say about the movie -

It made a TON of money for Universal.  In fact Metalstorm made more money for them than their other 3-D release of the year, the big ticket Jaws 3-D.

Band got badly burned on the business end, so, with what little he got from Universal, he started his own distribution company (Empire) and created a cinematic legacy that will be remembered (fondly by some, not so fondly by others) for many a moon to come.... :-)

I just snagged a copy of the first Trancers the other day, Thomerson is just too cool in that as well.  "How's my tan?"

[Fearless Freep]

Of course, you have to realize that METALSTORM: THE DESTRUCTION OF JARED-SYN was made in the brief period of the 3-D craze and was intended to be just that, at least by it's distributor/backer Universal Pictures.

Yeah, along with "Spacehunter: Adventures In The Forbidden Zone"...I remember that one, as well.

There were a few shots where I was thinking "that's a weird shot" and then I'd remember that in 3-D it would have a certain effect

effects work is still good

On that, I will disagree. The various flying scooter shots were very bad and considering what had already been done with "Empire Strikes Back" a few years earlier... I will grant that the budget is an issue, but that just makes the effects "understandbly bad" not "good" :)

if you want to see him in a better character role take a look at THE DUNGEONMASTER (1984),

I will try.  I happen to thing he does well in what I've seen him in ("Survivor", "Galaxis", another movie called "Survivor") most of the stuff he's *in* is pretty bad, but like Thomerson, he manages to bring the best the director will allow

And as for the title, it's said that Universal demanded "The Destruction of Jared-Syn" on the credits of the title so you know who to blame.

Kinda weird

I will say that Charlie Band has produced better films during his theatrical days of the 1980's

I particularly like "Arena". "Meridian" was also well done, and I'm watching "Crawlspace" now, which seems pretty good.  Looking over his filmography from the persio, there are some pretty decent, or at least entertaing, movies from that period; "Eliminators" was fun...but he must share the blame for "Laserblast" :)

but I will also admit that METALSTORM was not too bad and could have been so much better.

Yes, it could've.  To me, the biggest killer was the story, as in all the little unexplained points taht left me scratching my head thinking "huh...why did...?" Also the hero and the heroine were not well cast.

[The Burgomaster]

I saw METALSTORM at the movies, in 3-D, with a group of friends. It was many years ago and I still haven't recovered.

[AndyC]

I get a little nostalgic for that brief 3-D craze of the 80s. Metalstorm, in particular, takes me back to the very first pay channels introduced in my area. I saw it on one of the free preview weekends, along with stuff like Treasure of the Four Crowns and Megaforce. My cheap dad wouldn't spring for the descrambler, so when they had a free weekend, I was glued to the TV.

On the subject of Richard Moll, he is a very underrated actor. It's also worth noting the voice work he's done in cartoons. Can you believe he just turned 60?

[Chadzilla]

No way.

[JohnL]

>Meridian

 I liked this one too, except that they should have spent a little more time on continuity. Fenn sees the ghost of a girl that is alternately described as her father's sister and the first lady of the castle, 300 years before. Gee, her father was 300 years old? When the bad guy tries to tie her hand to the headboard of the bed and then smacks her, her arm flops off the bed. In the next shot it's tied and the beast has to untie it.