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Author Topic: OT:entertainment matures, parents don't  (Read 4557 times)
BeyondTheGrave
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« on: January 02, 2005, 09:26:40 PM »

Ive been noticeing a growing trend that is very distrubing. As certain aspects of entertainment grow more mature like video games haveing more mature themes same thing goes for cartoons (Anime) movies and magzines, parents seem to complain and try shelter their kids instead of understanding it. Now the reason I bring this up because I was in the fye today and a kid about 14 was trying to buy a anime called Hellsing. Now I have Hellsing and it nothing a 14 year old cant handle. Oh and the reason I know hes 14 cause of the of the mother reaction: "Your  14 years old your not getting that violent porn". typically responce to someone who doesnt now Anime. first if it was one of the porns that anime has it would have clearly been marked with a warning on it 18 years up. second the mom didnt even look at the box she heard hellsing and it was downhill from there.

I know alot of the members of the board are parents. I would like to know how do you handle the growing maturity of entertainment. I know its alot different from back in the day.(even if you dont have kids you can also put your two cent in well because I dont have kids either.)


 You can’t give it, you can’t even buy it, and you just don’t get it!-Aeon Flux
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dudeman
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« Reply #1 on: January 02, 2005, 10:20:49 PM »

I think kids have to be able to evaluate things instead of being completley ignorant of things that exist out there in the world and are bound to encounter whether they like it or not, otherwise they'd be the kind of kid who wouldn't even know what semen is in a health class.

So I think parents should just let their kids know why they should avoid such things instead of just making them not know this stuff even exists in the first place. I myself had to raise my little brothers as my folks were out making a living and I let the kids watch TV 14 sutff even if they were only 5 at the time. Hardcore porn and gore is where I'll cross the line though. I'll let them know things of such nature exists and should be avoided for their own good,

hmm....maybe a little gore is okay if they're mature enough to not think maliciously about it since there are kids more mature than a lot of adults I know. I'm a bit ambivalent about this topic now that I think about it,.
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BeyondTheGrave
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« Reply #2 on: January 02, 2005, 10:31:18 PM »

I agree with you dudeman. When I was little my mom let me watch just about   anything but always drew the line at porn and sex in certain movies.

 You can’t give it, you can’t even buy it, and you just don’t get it!-Aeon Flux
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Menard
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« Reply #3 on: January 03, 2005, 01:23:17 AM »

My question is how many 14 year olds have you seen buying anime? And out of that, how many instances such as the one you described have occured. Yes, parents are protective of their children; such is the nature of parents and our species. When I was a child (uhh...that of course was only a couple of years ago) we had a few channels available on the antenna; quite a few mothers were stay at home moms; video games did not exist; home video did not exist; and television was strict about what could be shown. That is not to say there were not things to concern yourself with about your kids, there were plenty. Now add to that scenario cable TV; broadcast television showing things like Fear Factor and CSI; videos and video games just about anybody can rent; and both parents having to work to make ends meet. Very often parents today have less time available for their kids than mine did when I was a kid but are flooded with all types of things their kids can get into. This does not give much time for checking things out. Parents are concerned for their kids and it is their place and right to restrict what their kids watch, play, and read. I have also heard some young people criticize parents for using parental controls on TVs as a way to babysit their kids with a TV. This is patently untrue. Parental controls and internet filters, and the such, are useful tools for parents to use among a flood of access and media that nobody has the time or capability to research it all, and watching over a childs shoulder all the time is impractical and imposing on the child. I am not a parent, but seeing what parents have to deal with today compared to what my parents had to deal with, and further having their hands bound by childless young social workers trying to tell them how to raise their kids, I can certainly respect parents for having a tougher job to do. I do not think that an isolated incident with a 14 year old trying to buy anime defines and entire group. Now I hope that I have not put you to sleep with my rambling ( :

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BeyondTheGrave
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« Reply #4 on: January 03, 2005, 01:45:12 AM »

 I know what you mean Menard. I wasnt trying to define a entrie group from the incident I mentioned. I was using it as a example. I know its much hard to take of kids nowdays but what I was trying to point out is how judgmental parents can be over certain things. The mother of the child quickly dismissed the anime without reading lables on the box or anything. It like you wont let a kid who 13 watch something because it "TV14".It could have one curse in it to make like that.


  You can’t give it, you can’t even buy it, and you just don’t get it!-Aeon Flux
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Menard
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« Reply #5 on: January 03, 2005, 04:06:09 AM »

That's not being a parent, that's being closed-minded. There are all types of people, and so there are all types of parents. Being a photographer and having done more than my share of chlid photography, I have run across quite a cross section of parents. I used to joke about it whenever people would think that kids would be difficult in that situation, " The kids are fine; it's those grown-ups they bring with them that are brats." Most parents I presume, at least most I know, would have looked at the video, the ratings code if any, and read the description. Just consider the same parent in each decade: 50's- 'Mom, can I get this Space Tales comic?", " You're not getting that juvenile delinquent trash"; 60's-  " Mom, can I get this Timothy Leary book?", " You're not getting that dopefiend trash."; 70's- " Mom, can I get this Kiss album?", " You're not getting that Satan music."; 80's- " Mom, can I see Footloose?", " You're not seeing that Kevin Bacon movie." (I couldn't resist). The decades change but it's the same person judging something without bothering to find out what it is; they just happen to also be a parent.

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George
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« Reply #6 on: January 03, 2005, 10:08:34 AM »

I am a parent and I make it a point to review anything that my daughter (5) may come in contact with.  As an example, I like the game Grand Theft Auto.  As an adult (37) I am able to discern what is real and not and, I believe, that most young people are as well.  I do not, however, allow my daughter to see me playing GTA because, I believe, it's move violence than she needs to be exposed to at her age.  I will, however, let her watch most any cartoon since she is able to determine (I quiz her on this) that the violence is pretend.

I don't limit this type of testing to video games.  The mocumentary "Smallpox" was on last night.  I didn't think it would be a big deal but, after about 3 minutes, I hit the record button and changed the channel.

Sometimes as a parent you don't have the luxury of doing a thorough review of subject matter.  You must rely upon a generally accepted view and that is what the video game and movie rating systems are designed to do.
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AndyC
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« Reply #7 on: January 03, 2005, 11:15:46 AM »

I'm not worried about parents being too restrictive of what their children watch. A much greater concern is the number of parents who don't give a damn what their kids see. We've had threads about this before. The parents want to see a movie, and they take the kids, whether it's appropriate or not. Same with rentals.

And there are not that many restrictions on what is accessible to kids, or even what is aimed at their particular market.

On the other hand, I don't condone knee-jerk reactions on the part of parents. If you want to make rules that work, you have to know what you're talking about. And you can't just label something good or bad. Some thought needs to be put into whether it is appropriate for the child, and if not, when they will be old enough for it. Parents should have an awareness of what is appropriate for their children, and that awareness should grow with the kids. In that light, I do find it hard to believe that any readily-available anime would be more than a 14-year-old can handle, but without knowing the anime or the kid, I can't really say.

I can say that if the video weren't forbidden, it probably wouldn't be half as much fun for him. I just need to look back on the collection of George Carlin tapes and dirty magazines I had in high school to appreciate that basic truth.

On a related topic, do any of you know of kids who are actually stricter than their parents? I've got a nephew, about 10 years old, and I recently learned that he censors his own viewing. He actually stopped watching Ferris Buehler's Day Off because of the swearing. I had to think pretty hard to remember where the swearing was in that movie. At that age, I was watching Blazing Saddles, Smokey and the Bandit and anything I could get my hands on that had coarse language or an occasional pair of boobs in it. He's an extremely precocious kid, but I can't imagine how he got to be such a serious kid. My sister is nothing like that. She's got a healthy sense of humour. It's a mystery.



Post Edited (01-03-05 12:03)
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Sugar_Nads
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« Reply #8 on: January 03, 2005, 12:06:25 PM »

Well, that's just the result of GOOD parenting.

Judging from your post, you sound alot like some angry 16 year old trying to garner attention through pathetic, whiny tales of angst.
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Master Blaster
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« Reply #9 on: January 03, 2005, 01:17:45 PM »

Do you always have to insult people just because you disagree with them?
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Menard
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« Reply #10 on: January 03, 2005, 01:21:36 PM »

Don't hold back; tell us what you really think ( :

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ulthar
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« Reply #11 on: January 03, 2005, 01:26:50 PM »

Personally, I think it is the parent's decision.  And, they don't have to understand "it" or justify to anyone.  If a parent does not want their child watching anime, that's it.  I don't think it is your place (or mine) to tell that parent they should HAVE to watch it, or understand it, or anything.  They say "no," it's over.

You will never convince me that a child is harmed in any way, shape or form by being denied watching any movie or cartoon or playing any video game.  When that child turns 18, if they want to watch it (or play it), they probably will.

I would hope that parent substitutes that denial of watching (whatever) with a more constructive activity: arts, crafts, physical exercise, etc.  Studies have shown that watching tv is not brain centric; it is better for your child's development to do things that are more stimulating.

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AndyC
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« Reply #12 on: January 03, 2005, 01:47:13 PM »

Not exactly clear where you're aiming that, Sugar. The original post?

Rich's point isn't all that unreasonable. It's the difference between a knee-jerk reaction and an informed decision. Parents should endeavour to understand what interests their children, then decide what's appropriate. Granted, they can't preview every movie or play every game, but they can do a little basic research. Maybe the video would still be on the black list, but I think the kid might be more accepting if the decision had some basis that could be explained to him.

Personally, I would be annoyed as well, if I heard someone making a statement such as the one quoted. Violent porn? That's a bit much. My mother was a great one for condemning TV shows she's never seen. Any cartoon that wasn't from the golden age of Hanna Barbera (Yogi, Huckleberry Hound, Snagglepuss, etc.) was bad. She used to complain about that show I watched in high school "with the robots that turn into things." She wouldn't even use the title. She has professed to hate the Simpsons (or "that show with the yellow people") for 15 years, and has, to my knowledge, never seen an episode. She was recently very surprised to learn that it is one of the few shows on TV that shows families regularly attending church. It was always clear that she had no idea what she was talking about. If she had attempted to forbid me to watch something at 14 (almost 20 years ago), her authority would have been seriously undermined.

Parents who do not understand what their children watch, are, by their ignorance, limiting what they can do about it. They can't offer valid reasons why it's inappropriate, and they have no idea when it will be appropriate.

With plans for children, and a pile of sci-fi/horror/action movies I want to share with them, you can imagine I've given this particular issue a good deal of thought.



Post Edited (01-03-05 12:55)
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Menard
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« Reply #13 on: January 03, 2005, 02:20:14 PM »

AndyC wrote:

>  Any cartoon that wasn't from the golden age
> of Hanna Barbera (Yogi, Huckleberry Hound, Snagglepuss, etc.)
> was bad.

What do you mean 'Golden Age'? Those were cartoons from my childhood. Makes me feel old ( :

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AndyC
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« Reply #14 on: January 03, 2005, 02:36:42 PM »

Can't say it's harmful to limit any form of entertainment, and you are absolutely right that real hands-on activities should be encouraged from an early age.

Still, you can't deny that it's good for kids to learn that there are reasons behind rules, and I think it can only strengthen parental authority if rules are seen as more than arbitrary decisions. It also helps to teach the kids to make better decisions when their parents aren't around. But it requires a rule to be more than a snap decision, to be obeyed "because I said so."

Parents have every right to do it that way. But it would be wiser for them to understand the issue, and do a little homework, particularly when dealing with something unfamiliar. We complain when governments pass sweeping laws based on unfounded public fears and half-informed hearsay. I can't see why parents should do the same thing.

That said, I'm definitely no supporter of permissive parenting. Once the rule is made and explained, it should not be open to negotiation, and it should be consistently applied, with appropriate consequences.



Post Edited (01-03-05 13:53)
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