ulthar
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
Karma: 368
Posts: 4168
I AM serious, and stop calling me Shirley
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« on: November 07, 2005, 03:29:26 PM » |
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Short answer: don't waste your time if you taped it.
What a waste of a good opportunity for a fun disaster flick. Instead, we get constant political inuendo, cheesy camera tricks (constant slow motion where it makes no sense, blur motion effects where it makes no sense, etc).
We have a modified SR-71, with pilot Viper from Top Gun (err, that's Tom Skerritt, looking a little old to be the *BEST* man for the job as he is reported to be) flying at Mach some-high-number at 1500-30,000 ft. Geeez.
We have tornados that hit buildings and make them EXPLODE.
In the first 30 minutes, we completely DESTROYED the pyramids of Egypt.
We have rampant poison frogs, flies and other plagues of the Old Testament, and a televangelical couple taking advantage of all this to boost their ratings/income.
We have EXPERT meteorologists who know SOMETHING BAD is happening, but they CANNOT predict what or where. Then, miraculously, they realize it is the heat island effect from big cities that is triggering the 'storms.' Whoa. That's some brilliant thinking there. (The fact that the storms are not all occurring near big cities seems to be immaterial).
Did I mention the political/social preaching? Global warming, rural folks are nothing but ignorant hick rednecks without the sense to get out of the way of a tornado, the government can do anything, FEMA has problems, Department of Homeland Security can fix all problems, etc. Nonstop.
But the worst, the WORST is that this movie commits the unpardonable sin: it is boring. It is a bleeping soap opera. What it the WORLD made the makers of the feces think I cared about the budding romance between the college age children of the two main characters? About the romance between the two main characters when they were in college? About the romance between a cop and a reporter?
ARRRRGH.
I won't be watching the second half, due to air next Sunday. Evan Randy Quaid could not save this gunk that belongs at the bottom of a septic tank.
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