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THE CARS THAT ATE PARIS - Skull
Rated PG
Copyright 1974 Salt-Pan Films.
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Arthur - Little wormy guy who is adopted by the citizens of Paris after a bad accident.
  • Mayor - Leading the city of vultures.
  • George - Arthur's brother, killed within the first few minutes.
  • Dr. Midland - Crazy doc who experiments on patients, uses a power drill at times.
  • Darryl - Young ruffian with quite a hat, likes playing with the patients at the clinic who come in four flavors to him. (Full veggie, 3/4 veggie, 1/2 veggie, and 1/4 veggie) He get's smashed in a car by Arthur.
  • Rev Mulray - Catholic Priest who is shot by the town idiot.
  • The Cars that Ate Paris - Driven by the town's crazy youth, the most interesting is a VW covered in spikes.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

This movie is terrible, I hate it. I hate Peter Weir who directed it and would like him to know that I wish to kick his ass.* For whatever reason you made this film it utterly destroys the merits you tried to reclaim with "Dead Poet's Society" - you are sick man and will spend eternity in Hell being raped by demonic 57 Chevys for this. Now that I'm finished ranting about the director we can get some tidbits on this movie. The Paris in question is in Australia which sent me warning signals immediately. So anyway, this damn town makes it's living by running travelers off the road and then stripping the cars of parts and luggage. George and Arthur are one set of victims, the latter surviving to be adopted by the mayor. The town's youth are the antagonists, being wild and chaotic creatures who finally go on a rampage in their cars after which Arthur leaves, end of story. In this plot there are numerous possibilities for genius and cool gore scenes but they never surface, ever. A doctor with a drill and we see jack, cars rolling down hills - it's like watching "The Worst of Cops" for goodness sake, and a VW covered in spikes which gets one person.

* Threats to kick Peter Weir's ass are made in the name of comic relief. (This is what too many lawyers get's you - me having to make statements like this, what ever happened to common sense?)

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Always make sure the lugnuts on your wheels are tight.
  • Australian people transport calves around in the trunks of their cars (that's right - a young cow).
  • Recent accident victims should not be given word association exercises involving pictures of messy accidents.
  • Mentally retarded people will try to eat hood ornaments.
  • Parking Superintendent is a powerful position in rural towns.
  • The occupants of a mental ward do not belong at a town ball.
  • Fighting cars with a chair is a losing proposition.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 2 mins - What is this a cigarette ad? A Coca-Cola ad? A cigarette ad? A Jiffy-Lube ad?
  • 7 mins - What happened? It was too dark to see.
  • 10 mins - A power drill with a Red Cross symbol on it?
  • 30 mins - THIS MOVIE SUCKS!
  • 32 mins - If you're so scared of cars why did you get in one with a broken door lock?
  • 53 mins - Did a tiger just growl?
  • 54 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A FENCE!
  • 60 mins - Feeling weak, movie sucks, sick to stomach, having delusions of Peter Weir shaking hands with Adolf Hitler...
  • 64 mins - Hey, this is the same scene we saw as a picture like 45 minutes ago?
  • 75 mins - I would not sit on the hood of that car.
  • 87 mins - Why the hell is a French woman singing anyway?
  • End of movie - Cannot move my legs, Rosebud...

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note carsate1.wav Mayor: "As to our youth, they are idle, they are lazy, they need to work!"
Green Music Note carsate2.wav Dr. Midland: "You're a very, very sick man."
Green Music Note carsate3.wav Darryl: "Well you ever seen a bloke with a foot up his nose?"
Green Music Note carsate4.wav This strange chant the townspeople make, it involves almost every Australian word I can think of.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

ImageImage


ImageImage


 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipcarsate1.mpg - 2.1m
It is time to watch the Killer VW of Doom make roadkill, just be thankful that the cars finally slew someone. Even if the remarkable example of German engineering didn't sprout a gaping maw to devour victims as the cover promised (in an obscure sort of way).

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 4 5 [6]
Re: The Cars that Ate Paris
Reply #41. Posted on October 02, 2010, 07:01:53 AM by JPickettIII
I am watching this movie right now.  I recorded id on IFC.  I will have to say is WOW Question Buggedout  My first thought (and I am about twenty minutes into the movie is) about the movie is Was the director bored and just just actually make the first reality show?  I just seemed that the director just followed people around and then the people pretended to be on camera.  I loved in the beginning of the movie it appearred to be a cigarette add.  I all of saddened wanted a smoke.  I saw the drill with the red cross tape on it.  I think the town of Paris was a junk yard that had a two grow up in it.

I could go on and I want to go but I am using most of my brain power not going insane watching this movie.  I will finish the move and then write a better comment.

Help!
Re: The Cars that Ate Paris
Reply #42. Posted on October 09, 2010, 04:40:55 AM by RJ
I must admit that I went into this movie expecting something gory, but wow, I didn't expect this.

I actually liked this. It's a movie that tries to get us to think about society and the way cars have changed it. There's so much more you can read into with this movie - one piece of commentary is that car crashes and deaths are so easily accepted as a part of modern life. The title itself is a dead metaphor on how the town becomes so obsessed with cars that it literally "eats" it alive (in how the youths finally decide they've had enough of the town council trying to smother their ambitions and tear it apart). So whilst it's definitely not the best movie in the world, but it's not the worst either. It's an interesting movie and it's just a shame that the way it was marketed didn't help people's expectations.
Re: The Cars that Ate Paris
Reply #43. Posted on March 13, 2013, 12:34:58 PM by sentrick
I must say that after reading these fantastic comments, all I can do is laugh! “They’re brilliant!“  You can ‘t have a Cult Classic without the critics, as it inspires us lunatics love it even more….
Horror, dark comedy, someone mention reality show….. Well, I do know that it was filmed in and around Sofala, NSW, (Australia) and in 1974 this would have been more like a bl**dy documentary. 
Ironically and metaphorically after they improved the road to the place, civilization moved in and changed Sofala. So the cars really did eat Paris. 
Great, great, great, great, great movie, I especially loved the “vegies “ with boxes on their heads, brilliant s**t!!!
PS. If you like this movie, checkout “Welcome to Woop Woop”
Re: The Cars that Ate Paris
Reply #44. Posted on May 22, 2013, 05:23:21 AM by Trevor
Quote
This movie is terrible, I hate it. I hate Peter Weir who directed it and would like him to know that I wish to kick his ass.* For whatever reason you made this film it utterly destroys the merits you tried to reclaim with "Dead Poet's Society" - you are sick man and will spend eternity in Hell being raped by demonic 57 Chevys for this.

 BuggedoutTeddyR TeddyR TeddyR
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