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DEATH RACE 2000 - 3 Slimes
Rated R
Copyright 1978 New World Pictures.
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Frankenstein - David Carradine! Dark and brooding racer, he is believed to be a myriad of replaced limbs.
  • Machine Gun Joe - Sylvester Stallone! Racer with a classic gangster motif, except he stresses. A lot. Him and his ulcer say hi to a grenade.
  • Annie Paine - Daughter of the rebel leader who is out to capture or kill Frankenstein, she falls in love with him instead.
  • Myra - Joe's amazingly blonde navigator, helps him welcome the grenade.
  • Calamity Jane - Crazed female driver, her car looks like a steer until it runs over a land mine.
  • Matilda the Hun - Aryan poster girl, drives off a cliff.
  • Nero the Hero - Hits an explosive baby, points zero.
  • Junior Bruce - Hyper reporter, he won't stop campaigning for the race until Frankenstein runs him over.
  • Grace Parker - Heavy female reporter, she's the kind who is everybody's "dear friend."
  • Thomasina Paine - Leader of the resistance, Betsy Ross' daughter or something.
  • The President - Emperor of America who loves us all. Run down by Frankenstein.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

David Carradine running around in a leather jumpsuit, what else could you want? Well, maybe somebody other than David Carradine in the jumpsuit, but then Stallone wouldn't have anyone to stress about.

In 2000 America has been rebuilt by one man, the President has become an emperor. With this power he created the Race. Every year violent role-playing psychopaths are placed behind the wheels of high performance killing machines and sent across the country. Their goal? Finish alive with the most points from running down as many pedestrians as possible and it's all perfectly legal. See a line of doctors and nurses on the sidewalk? Thump, thump, thump: 110 points.

Lucky for us there are rebels who believe in safe highways; led by Thomasina Paine they decide to fight back. You have to feel sorry for Nero, he makes to run over what seems to be a cute little toddler and it turns out to be a doll full of explosives. The rebels really want to get Frankenstein though, he's favored to win the race and a personal friend of the President.

Having planted Annie as Frankenstein's navigator they try to capture or kill him to no avail; he is a man on a mission. His right hand was removed, in the real thing's place is an artificial one with a grenade embedded in it. (Believe it or not, Carradine makes the "hand grenade" joke - I didn't even get a chance.) Frankenstein hates the President and his race more than anyone else and he knows the winner gets to shake hands.

Okay, the entertainment value of this movie should be obvious. People are getting churned into road mush left and right with sports reporters acting like it's the Super Bowl.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • In the future marching bands suck.
  • David Carradine is a little skinny to be the imposing evil guy.
  • Every generation has one person who speaks like Howard Cosell.
  • Don't try to play matador with a car.
  • Blondes are not dumb; they are hard of hearing.
  • If you love someone set them free, if they come back turn them into road kill.
  • Stallone hates fly fishermen.
  • People do not make effective speed bumps.
  • David Carradine can kick Sylvester Stallone's ass.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 1 min - This title sequence does not bode well.
  • 7 mins - Yo Adrian! (You knew that was coming, your friends knew that was coming, the door knew that was coming...)
  • 25 mins - Pop goes the brain cavity!
  • 26 mins - Hey, how about sitting up? Thank you!
  • 26 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
  • 37 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST CLERGY! Wait a minute, he just ran over the Pope!
  • 44 mins - "Make fast my V1 rocket?"
  • 52 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A VIOLIN!
  • 56 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
  • 59 mins - RANDOM ACT OF VIOLENCE AGAINST A PIT CREW!
  • 76 mins - She's Batman! (Hehehehe!)

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note deathrace1.wav Junior: "Frankenstein, who lost a leg in 98, an arm in 99, with half a face and half a chest and all the guts in the world he's back! God only knows what he looks like under that mask, but he is back."
Green Music Note deathrace2.wav Junior: "Once again: Mr. President."
The President: "I have made the United Provinces of America the greatest power in the known universe."
Green Music Note deathrace3.wav Harold: "Which only goes to show that even the fearsome Frankenstein has a one hundred percent red-blooded American sense of humor."
Green Music Note deathrace4.wav Grace: "She was a great, dear friend of mine and I shall remember her forever howling down that freeway in the sky, knocking over...the angels."

 
Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Clipdeathrace1.mpg - 3.0m
This takes some explaining and I'm not the man to do it, but here goes. Old people are worth mondo points, but the doctors and nurses are probably in their twenties or thirties and are worth much less as road kill (this all makes sense in a weird Kevorkian sort of way). By running over the individuals worth less points it shows Frankenstein has a sense of humor.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 [2] 3 4 ... 9
Death Race 2000
Reply #9. Posted on October 09, 2000, 01:38:37 PM by Andrew K
As a futuristic political satire, this much better than Stallone's Demolition Man or Paul Verhoeven's desecration of Starship Troopers. For some reason, Roger Ebert gave the film zero stars, and his scathing review is in his new book I Hated Hated HATED This Movie. I'm not sure, but I think in one shot, Stallone runs over Bill Paxton's head. This isn't as far-fetched as it sounds; Paxton was a set designer at New World at the time, who was trying to break into acting.
Death Race 2000
Reply #10. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by FLOORMAN
I saw the move at the drive in when it came out. I have a warm spot in my heart for this move because I got "LUCKY" with my girlfrend for the first time that night!  
Death Race 2000
Reply #11. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Melissa Martin
All of the otherwise mentioned reasons that Death Race 2000 is, quite simply, the best movie of all time, are perfectly correct.

HOWEVER, what I love the most is how all of a sudden, in the last ten minutes of the film, there appears a whole sociopolitical subtext that is essentially NEVER alluded to in the rest of the movie (unless you count the two messages from Mr. President, I suppose)... "Only the winner gets to shake hands with MR. PRESIDENT." And when Frankenstein becomes President, and suddenly all these issues pop up that you would never have known about (moving center of government to New L.A., etc.)

 BRILLIANT. If they had actually employed the sociopolitical-assasination thread through the entire movie, it wouldn't have been such a stroke of genius as to have it just show up like that.

 "Scoring isn't killing, Mr. Frankenstein, it's part of the Race. You're a national hero, Mr. Frankenstein..."

Melissa.
Death Race 2000
Reply #12. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:09:49 PM by Bruce
Death Race 2000!!!!! What a great goofy film!!! It has to be remade; it is screaming to be remade!--like 'Death Race 3000' starring Tom Cruise as Frankenstein or something!!!  They knew it would be a low-budget loser when they made it, so they ran with it and had a lot of fun, and that certainly shines through!  Movies aren't fun anymore---they are so over-made. And Let's bring back the Drive-In too!!! Long Live 'Death Race 2000'!
Death Race 2000
Reply #13. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Mad Hatter
CyberPheonix, actually what you call a plothole is not one there is a scene where Frankenstein explain there is a new Frankenstein every year, so THis one has never had the chance to assainate Mr. President. It is a personal vendetta.

Also, it is funny that in the "Feel Good" end of the movie where supposedly everything is supposed to turn out peachy there are a few subtle indications that the new goverment is also going to be corrupt.

If you are a buff of this movie, as I am, Coreman also came out with a comic book sequel, which has a few good gags, but has the subtle nature of a Moose at a cat show.

I attempted to write a sequel as fanfic, but felt it was more trouble than it was worth.  It invovled that David Carridene's character was a French imposter of the real Frankenstein, who had studied him so closely as to lose sight of the mission. The Real Frankenstein deposes him and reinstates the race. It is left amiguous wether or not this is the truth or propoganda of the reinstalled Mr. President regime.

Death Race 2000
Reply #14. Posted on December 13, 2001, 01:01:49 AM by Zebulon McCranahan
Is David Caradine the greatest actor of all time?  The answer is yes.  From Death Race 2000 to Sonny Boy with Kung Fu the Legend Continues and Death Sport in between, Caradine has shown time and again that he can suck enough to be funny but not too much as to be unbearable.  Everything this guy touches is drunken gold so check out his entire lifes work
Death Race 2000
Reply #15. Posted on May 21, 2002, 10:59:16 PM by Chris
Simply put, the greatest drinking movie of all time.
Death Race 2000
Reply #16. Posted on November 25, 2006, 04:10:12 PM by Gary Frazier
I wouldn't call this classic, I wouldn't call it a great film, but it's definitely worth seeing at least once.

It's clearly a satire (Paul Bartel was an excellent choice as director, his black humor pervades the scenes with characters; he also has an uncredited cameo as Frankenstein's doctor) on the excesses of American Media from the 70's on.   In 1975 it was over the top; by now, 2001, the sort of media nonsense depicted in the movie is so routine that many don't get the jokes.  It seems normal.

Stallone nearly steals the film; this was made just prior to his breakout in "Rocky", and he is great as Machinegun Joe Viturbo.  This thing even has Fred "Gopher" Grandy as Matilda the Hun's navigator.

Watch for the explanation of the scoring system...it's hilarious with graphics for each category of targets...like something that CNN on Faux News would run to explain who was winning during the bombing of Afghanistan, and delivered with exactly the same straight face.

There's also plenty of 70's style gratuitous nudity in this film, something that you just don't see anymore...it reflects, in many ways, a more innocent and less cynical time.

I wish the DVD had running commentary by Bartel or Corman; the interview of Corman by Maltin is pretty lightweight and doesn't get nearly as detailed as I'd like, although the discussion of low-budget vs. high-budget films is very interesting and provides some insight into Corman's moviemaking approach.  Unfortunately, this film wouldn't stand a chance of being a hit nowadays due to distribution politics.  We are poorer for that.
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