Bad Movie Logo
"A website to the detriment of good film"

Custom Search
HOMEB-MOVIE REVIEWSREADER REVIEWSFORUMINTERVIEWSUPDATESABOUT


HOWLING II - 2 Slimes
Rated R
Copyright 1984 Cinema '84 (Very original...)
Reviewed by Andrew Borntreger on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Ben - Brother of the deceased newscaster Karen White, (I'm hoping you've seen the first Howling.) he's the heroic hero type. You know, the kind of guy who will let out a manly yell while shooting someone in the back.
  • Jenny - Another reporter and Ben's girlfriend. Her job is either screaming ("Lookout Ben, behind you!") or helping Stefan convince her boyfriend this is all real.
  • Stefan - Christopher Lee! Seems that he's a 10,000 year old werewolf hunter who used to boink his sister. Transforms into a human tiki torch.
  • Vasile - Dwarf werewolf hunter, probably the best knife thrower I've ever seen. (Cough.) His eyes explode after hearing Stirba's demonic chant.
  • Tondo - Another companion of Stefan who turns out to be evil.
  • Mariana - Reputed to be among the most violent and cunning of female werewolves, which is why Ben kills her with a knife.
  • Vlad - Stirba's mate and high priest, also taken out by Ben.
  • Stirba - Sybil Danning! Queen of the werewolves and Stefan's sister. Also a tiki torch.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

First off, are there any budding Siskel and Ebert types out there who think this is a good movie? Yes? Hang it up buddy; go apply at Burger King or Sears; you are not going to make it as a movie reviewer and seem to have limited intelligence.

While definitely not a good film, this has some redeeming qualities and certainly worth watching just for Ben. He is angry for starters. Any time you have some big blonde guy wearing denim with an attitude... ...plus he can get eight shots out of a .38 revolver. (Look at the size of the cylinder, it is not going to happen.)

Basically, the film takes up where its predecessor left off. Karen White was just killed as she turned into a werewolf on television. Now, Stefan wants to drive a titanium stake through her heart. You may ask, "Why not silver or wood?" Turns out that some werewolves are immune to silver and only titanium can kill them. That must have sucked for those medieval villagers.

Priest: "You must use a weapon of pure titanium to kill the beast."
Villagers: "What the heck is titanium?"

Mr. Happy News goes on to drop another bombshell: The world is infested with lycanthropes and when Stirba finally comes to her full power all hell will break loose. Ben takes some convincing, but finally all three journey to Transylvania and hook up with Stefan's little band of freedom fighters there. After locating the castle mankind's last hope is armed with titanium weapons, two pistols, a rifle, holy water, blessed earplugs, and holy oil for the final conflict. Do not discount the oil. Stefan uses it like a grenade against one werewolf, dropping it in the hole and running as all sorts of pyrotechnics burst out.

Bottom line is that someone took a decent premise (depraved werewolf queen presides over her cursed subjects) and managed to screw it up big time. Reusing the same footage flashed before us over and over is just one symptom.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Christopher Lee looks odd in new age sunglasses.
  • Tough women drive Volkswagen Rabbits.
  • If a silver bullet kills someone then they are a werewolf.
  • Some werewolves are only harmed by titanium... (Boy were those villagers out of luck.)
  • Hitchhikers = werewolf takeout food.
  • Villages are always having some sort of festival.
  • Finding the one woman of color in a Transylvanian town should not be difficult.
  • Werewolves can throw their voice while chanting demonic rites.
  • Never wear a bell on you head when some viscous dwarf is running amok with a flail.
  • Spontaneous Human Combustion is caused by incest.

Stuff To Watch For: 

  • 4 mins - Um, the "dead girl" is breathing.
  • 11 mins - Ouch! (Bottle to the head.)
  • 11 mins - Ouch! (Pipe to the head.)
  • 12 mins - Ouch! (Crate to the head.)
  • 19 mins - Ewww, now that you put it that way.
  • 20 mins - Left your lights on... ...hey Ben, your lights are on... ...yo, MORON! Lights!
  • 24 mins - Next on Fox: When Wookies Attack.
  • 34 mins - RANDOM GRATUITOUS BREAST SHOT!
  • 42 mins - Ben is wearing jeans and she has shorts on, but they are having sex.
  • 62 mins - Did you get those holy amulets at a garage sale or something?
  • 65 mins - Werewolf orgy!
  • 84 mins - How many times can we watch Stirba rip off her clothes during the ending credits remix?
    Let us see: 17 ...that would be seventeen.

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note howlingii1.wav Jenny: "What do you know about the death of Karen White?"
Stefan: "I know that she is a werewolf."
Green Music Note howlingii2.wav Ben: "Jenny, what'd he say?"
Jenny: "He said your sister is a werewolf."
Ben: "Ah bullshit."
Green Music Note howlingii3.wav Stefan: "Even now there are great numbers of werewolves living secretly among us!"
Green Music Note howlingii4.wav Stirba: "Stefan, you never could resist me."
Green Music NoteTheme Song Listen to a clip from the soundtrack.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

ImageImageImage
ImageImageImage
Image


 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Cliphowlingii1.mpg - 1.9m
Next on Fox: When Wookies Attack.

 Leave a commentEXTRASBuy the movie 

Share It!Buy the movieIMDB Logo
Stumble This ReviewStumble This Review
Digg This ReviewDigg This Review
Buy it from Amazon.com (United States)

Internet Movie Database


Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 3 4 [5]
Re: Howling II
Reply #33. Posted on June 07, 2008, 09:28:02 PM by Ross
I just posted a review of this awesomely bad film:
http://whatiwatchedlastnight.blogspot.com/2008/04/howling-ii-your-sisters-werewolf.html

Including 4 clips to go along with it. 

 
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fIYLmwJQZrs" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fIYLmwJQZrs</a>

Christopher Lee explains the plot

<a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=UH4bSOdjtOA" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win">http://youtube.com/watch?v=UH4bSOdjtOA</a>

Vampire Bat vs. Priest

<a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=d__WpZwJivY" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win">http://youtube.com/watch?v=d__WpZwJivY</a>

Werewolf Orgy

<a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=8iwXz6Kk9Yc" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win">http://youtube.com/watch?v=8iwXz6Kk9Yc</a>

Credits Sequence - Film Highlights & Sybil Danning Flashing her breasts 10 times.
Re: Howling II
Reply #34. Posted on May 05, 2009, 05:46:45 PM by skully13
 Why does everyone put down movies that are entertaining?
There is nothing wrong with having fun with a movie and the premise behind it. The Howling Saga is a rather pointless series of movies but not entirely the piece of crap they are made out to be. While it is true that there are several mistakes in this particular film in the series, it is one of the best of the Howling films and is enjoyable...especially the theme song by Steve Parsons which is an amazing song. So stop picking on the little known goodies in the world.
Re: Howling II
Reply #35. Posted on August 21, 2009, 12:58:50 PM by don duf
I agree the movie sucked but i loved the soundtrack especially the song by Babel.  However getting the soundtrack is proving to be impossible.  I was never released on cd.  The lime wire method is ineffective.  If anyone knows how to acquire the soundtrack please e mail me at sick_puppy99@yahoo.com. hot
Re: Howling II
Reply #36. Posted on August 29, 2009, 10:33:23 AM by Tiki
The movie is boring as hell.  The best part of the movie is the ending, when this awesome new wave group does a small music video with all the best parts of the movie. Who are those guys? They kick ass.
The name of the band is called "Babel". And "YES" they do kick ass.
Re: Howling II
Reply #37. Posted on April 03, 2010, 09:24:27 AM by JPickettIII
I did not see this on the site yet, but I found an unofficial (should be official) music video for the Howling II.

Enjoy  Cheers
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PhZ9uAPiI_8" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PhZ9uAPiI_8</a>


Later,

John
Pages: 1 ... 3 4 [5]
 Share on Facebook
RSS Feed Subscribe Subscribe by RSS
Email Subscribe Subscribe by Email


Recommended Articles
How To Find A Bad Movie

The Champions of Justice

Plan 9 from Outer Space

Manos, The Hands of Fate

Podcast: Todd the Convenience Store Clerk

Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

The Human Tornado

Maniac

The Educational Archives: Driver's Ed

Godzilla vs. Monster Zero

Do you have a zombie plan?

FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

Lesson Learned:
  • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

Subscribe to Badmovies.org and get updates by email:

HOME B-Movie Reviews Reader Reviews Forum Interviews TV Shows Advertising Information Sideshows Links Contact
Badmovies.org is owned and operated by Andrew Borntreger. All original content is © 1998 - 2014 by its respective author(s). Image, video, and audio files are used in accordance with Fair Use, and are property of the film copyright holders. You may freely link to any page (.html or .php) on this website, but reproduction in any other form must be authorized by the copyright holder.