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ARMY OF DARKNESS - 4 Slimes
Rated R
Copyright 1992 Dino De Laurentiis Communications
Reviewed by Tenchi on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Ash - As bad-ass as they come. S-Mart Employee (an actual store) who gets sucked into the time portal at the end of the previous movie and finds out he's the chosen one who can stop the evil dead. (See Evil Dead 1 & 2 for more details).
  • Shelia - Very beautiful maiden. Hates Ash at first because she thinks he is a member of the army of a rival lord. She later falls in love with him and they have sex in front of a fire.
  • King Arthur - Not THE King Arthur. The leader of the people that capture Ash. He is the real honor and valor type, and doesn't like Ash that much in the beginning because he thinks Ash is a "loud-mouth Braggart" but learns to respect him.
  • Henry the Red - Leader of a kingdom that is a rival to the Arthur's. Ends up helping the King and Ash defeat the Army of Darkness.
  • Wiseman - Your wise old guy type who believes Ash is the chosen one when he falls from the sky.
  • The Little Ashes - Formed when Ash breaks a possessed reflection of himself in a mirror. They screw around with him some and torture him in ways I couldn't take. Despite the size difference, Ash manages to kill only one of them. These guys are funny as hell.
  • Evil Ash - An evil twin formed when Ash swallows one of the little Ashes. Leader of the Army of Darkness. Gets killed by Ash twice, once with a point blank shot with his twelve gauge, and a second time after being shot off of a catapult with a bag of gun powder.
  • The Army of Darkness - A bunch of dead soldiers who arise from the grave after Ash picks up the Necronomicon without saying the proper words to uncurse it.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

Ash, the hero of "Evil Dead" and "Evil Dead II" gets taken back to medieval times after being sucked into a time portal at the end of the last movie. The soldiers who find him think he is a soldier of the opposing army, while the wizard tries to convince the king that he is the chosen one. Ash gets thrown into a pit with two of the evil dead, both of whom are killed thanks to his chainsaw and twelve gauge, so everyone is convinced he's the chosen one. The wizard tells Ash that he has to retrieve the Necronomicon because it contains the passages that can return him to his own time and stop the evil. Before he leaves, Ash makes himself a new hand from a glove on a suit of armor. On his way to the location of the book, he runs into his evil reflections while hiding out in a windmill. I'm not going to go into detail, but he spawns an evil twin from swallowing a little Ash. After a brief conflict, he kills his evil twin and buries him. Before he picks up the book, he forgets the sacred words he was supposed to say that would uncurse the book and tries to BS his way through it. Big mistake. This causes the army of Darkness, along with his evil twin, to arise from the dead. Ash returns with the book, but when everyone realizes he didn't say the words, they lose faith in him. Sheila even loses faith with him and gets kidnapped by a demon and becomes possessed. Everybody feels like deserting and running from the Army of Darkness, but Ash convinces them to stay and fight. He decides to up the ante by doing things like making arrows loaded with gunpowder and turning his car into a death-tank. They start out pretty well against the Army of Darkness, but once the AoD get inside the castle, all hell breaks loose. Ash is attacked by the possessed Princess, but sticks her with a spear and throws her off of a tower. Eric the Red comes along and finally turns the tide against the Army of Darkness. A truce is made between Henry the Red and Arthur, Shelia becomes unpossessed, and they all live happily ever after. Ash returns to his own time and goes back to his job in the Housewares department, but did he really stop the Evil Dead for good?

Interesting Trivia: In Japan, this movie was titled: Captain Supermarket

There actually is a S-Mart in Texas (Houston I think). If you ask, they'll give you the Army of Darkness tour, which includes the Housewares Dept (Ash's area of expertise), and where they keep the guns.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Time/space portals end at some place in which you will drop about 50 feet. Fortunately, mats will be there to break your fall.
  • There are deserts in England.
  • Don't screw with Bruce Campbell and especially don't whip him.
  • Kill Deadites and women will go from hating you to wanting to bang you.
  • Don't under estimate little versions of yourself.
  • Don't take your aggressions out on a stove pipe, no matter how many times you hit your head on it.
  • It doesn't matter who's bad or who's good, the only thing that matters is who's the guy with the gun.
  • Evil twins are a pain in the ass.
  • When someone tells you to remember some words, you'd better damn well remember them.
  • Your Chevrolet turned death tank isn't worth destroying over your possessed gal.
  • Bruce Campbell is the God of Ass-Kicking, and don't your forget it.

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note armydark1.wav Duke Henry: "I am Henry the Red. Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands, and leader of its peoples."
Ash: "Well, hello Mr. Fancy Pants! I got news for you, pal. You ain't leading but two things right now: jack and s**t, and jack left town."
Green Music Note armydark2.wav *BOOM!*
Ash: "Yeah. All right you primitive screwheads, listen up. See this? This is my BOOMSTICK!"
Green Music Note armydark3.wav Ash tries to BS his way through saying the magic words.
Green Music Note armydark4.wav Deadite Sheila: "You found me beautiful once."
Ash: "Honey, you got real ugly."
Deadite Sheila: *SHRIEKS*
Note: most women will respond this way to a similar conversation.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Cliparmydark1.mpg - 5.4m
Ash takes on a Deadite hag.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 7 8 [9] 10
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #65. Posted on July 16, 2008, 08:57:14 AM by Lydia the Tatooed Mommy
Ok, so my boyfriend and I are huge dorks... we just had a son 5 weeks ago.. and we named him Ashley Cheers
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #66. Posted on September 28, 2008, 08:35:48 PM by Jonas
Funny Army of Darkness parody...

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mgO80pKx9I" target="_blank" class="aeva_link bbc_link new_win">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mgO80pKx9I</a>
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #67. Posted on February 08, 2009, 12:31:13 AM by Jordan
Is it me, or did you knock down your slime rating on "AOD" Andrew? I thought it had four originally.....
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #68. Posted on February 09, 2009, 12:12:47 AM by ds21
just watched it...such a fun film, but I wish they hadn't kept switching Ash's character from cowardly to awesome.  Just keep it awesome.  That's how we like it.

Nevertheless, a fun ride from beginning to end.  And the skeletons were hilarious, too, by the way.
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #69. Posted on February 09, 2009, 06:11:57 AM by Trevor
 Smile BounceGiggle BounceGiggle TeddyR

Quote
5 mins - You know, "The Gods Must Be Crazy" would have been more interesting if the main guy had found a chainsaw instead of that bottle

 BounceGiggle TeddyR
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #70. Posted on February 09, 2009, 07:05:13 PM by Andrew
Is it me, or did you knock down your slime rating on "AOD" Andrew? I thought it had four originally.....

It was a four under the older system that had a maximum of five.  I thought for quite a while about whether it should be a three or a four under the newer system.  Call it a three and a half?
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #71. Posted on February 09, 2009, 07:41:54 PM by elDuendeVerde
I enjoy this movie, but I find the first two movies to be far superior.  I remember the first night I saw this.  Me and my roommates rented Evil Dead.  Loved it so much that we ran back out to Blockbuster and rented Evil Dead 2.  Loved it even more, but by this time blockbuster was closed for the night.  So, one of my roommates made some calls and found someone who had a burned copy of it, so we borrowed it from him and watched it.

Maybe I had seen too many movies that night, maybe it was too late, or maybe it wasn't what I expected after seeing the first two; but I really hated Army of Darkness that first time I saw it.  I bought it a few years later (I had already bought the first two and I'm something of an OCD completionist) and popped it into my dvd player and enjoyed it quite a bit.  Not as great as the first two (ED2 is my all time fav), but still pretty good.
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #72. Posted on April 21, 2010, 02:03:23 PM by kornula
When I was given the link to this site, my initial reaction was "cool!" .. now I see its run by a bunch of trolls who post every single movie just to get a rise out of people  I mean;  the Evil Dead trilogy are fun movies which everyone enjoys and understands their humor.   That the point of these movies; to combine the elements of cheesy bad movies with good filmmaking. which is brilliant.   And well received and loved by many fans.  So why is this labeled a bad movie?    Why is Hedgwig and the Angry Inch labeled a bad movie?  It receives praise and detractors - as most brilliant films do (Brazil, 2001 etc..)

I wish you guys would focus on generally accepted bad films - and chuck the films that receive split reviews

otherwise you guys are sad trolls
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