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ARMY OF DARKNESS - 4 Slimes
Rated R
Copyright 1992 Dino De Laurentiis Communications
Reviewed by Tenchi on 'a long time ago'

The Characters:  

  • Ash - As bad-ass as they come. S-Mart Employee (an actual store) who gets sucked into the time portal at the end of the previous movie and finds out he's the chosen one who can stop the evil dead. (See Evil Dead 1 & 2 for more details).
  • Shelia - Very beautiful maiden. Hates Ash at first because she thinks he is a member of the army of a rival lord. She later falls in love with him and they have sex in front of a fire.
  • King Arthur - Not THE King Arthur. The leader of the people that capture Ash. He is the real honor and valor type, and doesn't like Ash that much in the beginning because he thinks Ash is a "loud-mouth Braggart" but learns to respect him.
  • Henry the Red - Leader of a kingdom that is a rival to the Arthur's. Ends up helping the King and Ash defeat the Army of Darkness.
  • Wiseman - Your wise old guy type who believes Ash is the chosen one when he falls from the sky.
  • The Little Ashes - Formed when Ash breaks a possessed reflection of himself in a mirror. They screw around with him some and torture him in ways I couldn't take. Despite the size difference, Ash manages to kill only one of them. These guys are funny as hell.
  • Evil Ash - An evil twin formed when Ash swallows one of the little Ashes. Leader of the Army of Darkness. Gets killed by Ash twice, once with a point blank shot with his twelve gauge, and a second time after being shot off of a catapult with a bag of gun powder.
  • The Army of Darkness - A bunch of dead soldiers who arise from the grave after Ash picks up the Necronomicon without saying the proper words to uncurse it.

Buy It!

The Plot: 

Ash, the hero of "Evil Dead" and "Evil Dead II" gets taken back to medieval times after being sucked into a time portal at the end of the last movie. The soldiers who find him think he is a soldier of the opposing army, while the wizard tries to convince the king that he is the chosen one. Ash gets thrown into a pit with two of the evil dead, both of whom are killed thanks to his chainsaw and twelve gauge, so everyone is convinced he's the chosen one. The wizard tells Ash that he has to retrieve the Necronomicon because it contains the passages that can return him to his own time and stop the evil. Before he leaves, Ash makes himself a new hand from a glove on a suit of armor. On his way to the location of the book, he runs into his evil reflections while hiding out in a windmill. I'm not going to go into detail, but he spawns an evil twin from swallowing a little Ash. After a brief conflict, he kills his evil twin and buries him. Before he picks up the book, he forgets the sacred words he was supposed to say that would uncurse the book and tries to BS his way through it. Big mistake. This causes the army of Darkness, along with his evil twin, to arise from the dead. Ash returns with the book, but when everyone realizes he didn't say the words, they lose faith in him. Sheila even loses faith with him and gets kidnapped by a demon and becomes possessed. Everybody feels like deserting and running from the Army of Darkness, but Ash convinces them to stay and fight. He decides to up the ante by doing things like making arrows loaded with gunpowder and turning his car into a death-tank. They start out pretty well against the Army of Darkness, but once the AoD get inside the castle, all hell breaks loose. Ash is attacked by the possessed Princess, but sticks her with a spear and throws her off of a tower. Eric the Red comes along and finally turns the tide against the Army of Darkness. A truce is made between Henry the Red and Arthur, Shelia becomes unpossessed, and they all live happily ever after. Ash returns to his own time and goes back to his job in the Housewares department, but did he really stop the Evil Dead for good?

Interesting Trivia: In Japan, this movie was titled: Captain Supermarket

There actually is a S-Mart in Texas (Houston I think). If you ask, they'll give you the Army of Darkness tour, which includes the Housewares Dept (Ash's area of expertise), and where they keep the guns.

Things I Learned From This Movie: 

  • Time/space portals end at some place in which you will drop about 50 feet. Fortunately, mats will be there to break your fall.
  • There are deserts in England.
  • Don't screw with Bruce Campbell and especially don't whip him.
  • Kill Deadites and women will go from hating you to wanting to bang you.
  • Don't under estimate little versions of yourself.
  • Don't take your aggressions out on a stove pipe, no matter how many times you hit your head on it.
  • It doesn't matter who's bad or who's good, the only thing that matters is who's the guy with the gun.
  • Evil twins are a pain in the ass.
  • When someone tells you to remember some words, you'd better damn well remember them.
  • Your Chevrolet turned death tank isn't worth destroying over your possessed gal.
  • Bruce Campbell is the God of Ass-Kicking, and don't your forget it.

 Audio clips in wav formatSOUNDSStarving actors speak out 

FileDialog
Green Music Note armydark1.wav Duke Henry: "I am Henry the Red. Duke of Shale, Lord of the Northlands, and leader of its peoples."
Ash: "Well, hello Mr. Fancy Pants! I got news for you, pal. You ain't leading but two things right now: jack and s**t, and jack left town."
Green Music Note armydark2.wav *BOOM!*
Ash: "Yeah. All right you primitive screwheads, listen up. See this? This is my BOOMSTICK!"
Green Music Note armydark3.wav Ash tries to BS his way through saying the magic words.
Green Music Note armydark4.wav Deadite Sheila: "You found me beautiful once."
Ash: "Honey, you got real ugly."
Deadite Sheila: *SHRIEKS*
Note: most women will respond this way to a similar conversation.

 Click for a larger imageIMAGESScenes from the movie 

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 Watch a sceneVIDEOMPEG video files 

Video Cliparmydark1.mpg - 5.4m
Ash takes on a Deadite hag.

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Comments:Write CommentPages: 1 ... 8 9 [10]
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #73. Posted on April 21, 2010, 06:17:27 PM by Andrew
When I was given the link to this site, my initial reaction was "cool!" .. now I see its run by a bunch of trolls who post every single movie just to get a rise out of people  I mean;  the Evil Dead trilogy are fun movies which everyone enjoys and understands their humor.   That the point of these movies; to combine the elements of cheesy bad movies with good filmmaking. which is brilliant.   And well received and loved by many fans.  So why is this labeled a bad movie?    Why is Hedgwig and the Angry Inch labeled a bad movie?  It receives praise and detractors - as most brilliant films do (Brazil, 2001 etc..)

I wish you guys would focus on generally accepted bad films - and chuck the films that receive split reviews

otherwise you guys are sad trolls

Have you read the review and actually looked around the site?  We celebrate everything from cult movies to truly awful creations of cinema.  The interest is if a movie is entertaining.  I rated "Army of Darkness" at 3 out of 4 slimes (call them stars) and said the following in the review:

Quote
I like "Evil Dead 2" more than "Army of Darkness." Yet, this is an entertaining cult film. You could even call it a gruesomely groovy comedy. The movie is filled with Three Stooges-style slapstick, and the head-bangs and eye-pokes are so well done that I get nostalgic to watch some old Stooges' shorts. Still, the reason that everybody loves Ash is that he has some great lines, the likes of which haven't been seen since the Stallone and Schwarzenegger action films of the 1980s, and he delivers them with style.

What about the review does not say that I liked the movie a lot?  Even more telling is that most of the reader comments say that the person liked or even loved the movie. 

Please provide a basis for your insulting comment that this is a site full of trolls.
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #74. Posted on April 21, 2010, 09:12:50 PM by Rev. Powell
When I was given the link to this site, my initial reaction was "cool!" .. now I see its run by a bunch of trolls who post every single movie just to get a rise out of people  I mean;  the Evil Dead trilogy are fun movies which everyone enjoys and understands their humor.   That the point of these movies; to combine the elements of cheesy bad movies with good filmmaking. which is brilliant.   And well received and loved by many fans.  So why is this labeled a bad movie?    Why is Hedgwig and the Angry Inch labeled a bad movie?  It receives praise and detractors - as most brilliant films do (Brazil, 2001 etc..)

I wish you guys would focus on generally accepted bad films - and chuck the films that receive split reviews

otherwise you guys are sad trolls

Andrew gets this complaint over and over again from people who just do not get the basic concept of "bad" movies or of the site.  Because Andrew or someone else reviews a movie on a "bad movie" site does not mean that the movie is unentertaining or without merit.  It just means that it's a movie of interest to the badmovies.org audience.  Some people seem to think that just placing one of their favorite movies inside the "badmovies.org" domain is a way of insulting the film; that's not the case at all.  Movies with high slime ratings are entertaining and worth seeing (even if "bad" by conventional standards) and movies with low ratings or skulls should be avoided.  It's as simple as that. 
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #75. Posted on November 02, 2011, 06:31:39 PM by CalrissianFoxxSteele
Only thing I have to say...this movie does not belong on this site.
None of the 'Evil Dead Series' does.
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #76. Posted on December 12, 2011, 09:59:39 AM by Trevor
I just read what kornula had to say so I say to you Jy is 'n poephol. I will not translate that.

Thanks for the review, Andrew: I saw this for the first time last night on the MGM channel of all places. Great review: great movie and both are very funny.
Re: Army of Darkness
Reply #77. Posted on December 15, 2011, 12:48:57 PM by JPickettIII
Only thing I have to say...this movie does not belong on this site.
None of the 'Evil Dead Series' does.

Dude, they are bad movies.  They are movies that we love with our hearts and will have a special place with most of us, but they are bad.  This is Badmoives.org.  They belong here.

Later,

John
Pages: 1 ... 8 9 [10]
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