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Article: Do you have a zombie plan? (Pt 2)

Started by Andrew, September 24, 2008, 08:18:17 PM

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Andrew

A man's home is his castle, and possibly his last refuge from the brain-eating legions of undead.  Is your house ready?

Andrew Borntreger
Badmovies.org

indianasmith

If  you live in a TWO story house with no external stairs, you can leave an upper floor window unboarded, with a rope ladder for escape/foraging expeditions.

\BTW, can zombies get through goat fencing?  If they're lousy fence climbers, I am GOLDEN!
"I shall smite you in the nostrils with a rod of iron, and wax your spleen with Efferdent!!"

Patient7

Barbeque sauce tastes good on EVERYTHING, even salad.

Yes, salad.

DementedDan

Basements are bad; too easy for zombies to fall into. You want to demolish the stairs leading up from the basement and the stari from the firt to the second floor and hide out there trapping the zombies below you since they cant climb without pilling on top of each other in huge numbers. You then use the demolished stairs to help fortify the first floor and use a ladder to go bettween.
Unless of course you get freaky fast zombies; in which case we are all fuxked.

Cthulhu

Quote from: indianasmith on September 24, 2008, 08:25:25 PM
If  you live in a TWO story house with no external stairs, you can leave an upper floor window unboarded, with a rope ladder for escape/foraging expeditions.

\BTW, can zombies get through goat fencing?  If they're lousy fence climbers, I am GOLDEN!
According to the Zombie survival guide, only 1 zombie out of 5 can climb. :teddyr:

BeyondTheGrave

My Grandfather is a retired carpenter so was have least 5 hammers and 4-5 cord/cordless drills with any type of nail you can think of. Only draw back is I live in Apt. building on the highest floor though. I would destroy the elevator and do a floor by floor sweep. than get to the lobby and start barricading.

Hopefully have enough time to make to the police precinct which is only 4 blocks away and get some guns. :smile:
Most of all I hate dancing then work,exercise,people,stupidpeople


InformationGeek

#6
Well now, I finally have a good shopping list for the next time I'm out buying things.  Your list has saved me!  Now, we must address the issues of an alien invasion.  After all, aliens are smarter, quicker, and more technically advance than zombies.
Website: http://informationgeekreviews.blogspot.com/

We live in quite an interesting age. You can tell someone's sexual orientation and level of education from just their interests.

StudPup

I am soooo Zombie Chow!  I have a question... Why do zombies always go for human brains? Why don't we ever see them take down a cow? That could be hellafunny!

Andoc

Hmmmmmmm.... so the hot MILF is now a naked zombie.... but she's still hot... Couldn't I just trap her, wash her, gag her and tie her hands and feet and have my way with her and then carve her head in with a hammer?

BigPaulieVirgo

Well, my house has a slope, so the zombies will probably break in and eat my family anyway...but I'll stock up
on the necessaries anyway! Thanks! Also, if possible, we need to get an old Greyhound bus, and put on some
acoutrements to allow us to ram through the hordes of zombies, whilst making a food run/getaway...

But what about the vampire plan? Too hard? I mean, if they follow convention, it should be easy to get them
before nightfall, correct? Maybe I need to rent '30 Days of Night' and get some clues...

Thanks AB! You Da Marine! Andrew in '08!  :thumbup:


Greenhornet

I checked out the related forums to catch up on this subject and I noticed that the "slow zombie/fast zombie" argument kept coming up. Let me point out that in the origonal Night Of The Living Dead, the zombies in the cemetary DID move fast when they went after Barbara, but later were slow-moving. I suggest that this was because their muscles were rotting and they were getting rigor mortis.

Like the living, zombies eventually succumb to "old age".

ghouck

#11
Quote from: Andoc on September 26, 2008, 12:49:49 PM
Hmmmmmmm.... so the hot MILF is now a naked zombie.... but she's still hot... Couldn't I just trap her, wash her, gag her and tie her hands and feet and have my way with her and then carve her head in with a hammer?

Andoc: Just say NO to Zombie Rape, Ok?
Raw bacon is GREAT! It's like regular bacon, only faster, and it doesn't burn the roof of your mouth!

Happiness is green text in the "Stuff To Watch For" section.

James James: The man so nice, they named him twice.

"Aw man, this thong is chafing my balls" -Lloyd Kaufman in Poultrygeist.

"There's always time for lubricant" -Orlando Jones in Evolution

BTM

QuoteHmmmmmmm.... so the hot MILF is now a naked zombie.... but she's still hot... Couldn't I just trap her, wash her, gag her and tie her hands and feet and have my way with her and then carve her head in with a hammer?
\

Hey, that was in The Stink of Flesh, although the dude didn't cave in her head, he just left her restrained in the barn.... http://www.amazon.com/Stink-Flesh-Special-Scott-Phillips/dp/B0008KLV7I/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1222468710&sr=1-1

I'd say it's probably not a good idea.  I mean, among other things, the virus (or whatever) may not just be spread by bites (if you get my drift).
"Some people mature, some just get older." -Andrew Vachss

Patient7

Quote from: Andoc on September 26, 2008, 12:49:49 PM
Hmmmmmmm.... so the hot MILF is now a naked zombie.... but she's still hot... Couldn't I just trap her, wash her, gag her and tie her hands and feet and have my way with her and then carve her head in with a hammer?

Dude, you gots problems.
Barbeque sauce tastes good on EVERYTHING, even salad.

Yes, salad.

Andrew

Quote from: Andoc on September 26, 2008, 12:49:49 PM
Hmmmmmmm.... so the hot MILF is now a naked zombie.... but she's still hot... Couldn't I just trap her, wash her, gag her and tie her hands and feet and have my way with her and then carve her head in with a hammer?

As was already pointed out, I would be concerned that zombism was an STD. 

Quote from: BigPaulieVirgo on September 26, 2008, 01:15:56 PM
Also, if possible, we need to get an old Greyhound bus, and put on some acoutrements to allow us to ram through the hordes of zombies, whilst making a food run/getaway...

But what about the vampire plan? Too hard? I mean, if they follow convention, it should be easy to get them
before nightfall, correct? Maybe I need to rent '30 Days of Night' and get some clues...

The military has some offroad 4 wheel drive buses that look like the standard yellow schoolbuses everyone knows.  Those would probably be even better.

There are alien, werewolf, vampire, and even Innsmouth plans in the future.  All of them need more work.  I just got rolling with the zombie plan part 2, so I went with it.

Quote from: StudPup on September 25, 2008, 10:17:27 PM
I have a question... Why do zombies always go for human brains? Why don't we ever see them take down a cow? That could be hellafunny!

They went after pet brains in Return of the Living Dead Part 2.  Still, seeing a horde of zombie tipping and then munching on a cow would be pretty funny.

Quote from: indianasmith on September 24, 2008, 08:25:25 PM
If  you live in a TWO story house with no external stairs, you can leave an upper floor window unboarded, with a rope ladder for escape/foraging expeditions.

\BTW, can zombies get through goat fencing?  If they're lousy fence climbers, I am GOLDEN!

Going up is always a plan, but jumping out of a window worries me.  I keep thinking about people doing crowd dives at concerts, and that is not something you would want to do into a zombie mob.  Sure, they might hold you up above their heads and pass you around - so each one of them can rip off a morsel as you pass by.
Andrew Borntreger
Badmovies.org