On one of my sites, I have an autoupdating daily joke feed (adult jokes). Today, I found this on the page:
A communist party official opened a whorehouse to attract tourists and their foreign currency. Adding up his books after a year, he discovered he had lost a great deal of money. "I don't understand it," he moaned. "I hired all the best girls. Why, every single one of them has been a good loyal party member for at least 30 years!"
It took me a while to get the joke; maybe it's just me.
After thinking about it, all of the ladies would have to be over 50.
Is this lame, or not?
It must be lame...I got it right away.
I'm limping already from reading it.
It brought a smile to my face, and pointed out the problems of communism.
Call me Mr. Dense, I don't get it. \
-Ed
Tacky, tacky, tacky....
I already had a headache, darn it.
Maybe it's got something to do with that '60s joke about "party girls".
Or maybe it's got something to do with the statements of certain pre-'60s radicalists who believed that marriage was part of the "old establishment", and that monogamy was "counter-revolutioary".
Or maybe we're all missing some insider joke about the indifference of socialized financial architecture in a representive civic model.
Or perhaps this is all part of some diabolical communist scheme to make my headache worse!
Although certainly not PC for today, the latest joke on the feed made up for the previous one.
The church service was under way and they passed the collection plate. When the preacher saw a $100.00 bill in the collection plate, he stopped the service and announced "who ever put the $100.00 bill in the plate please stand up." A gay man stood up and said, "I did." The preacher told him "since you put that money in the plate I would like to let you pick out three hymns." Excitedly, the gay guy said, "Well, I'll take him and him and him."
First one, kinda lame and silly, but then again I like my communist jokes like that [my socialist friend will love that joke when I tell it to him though]
The second one is funny, but kind of annoying really. It's a bit more straightfoward and predictable.
Personally I liked the first better.
How about this:
Santa Claus, a salesman and an intelligent Sarah Michelle Gellar fan see a $ 1000 dollar bill. Who picks it up first?
The salesman, cause the other ones are figments of your imagination!
WAKA WAKA WAKA WAKA!
A catholic, a muslim and a jew all walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says:
"What is this, some kind of joke?"
I got a kick out of this one the Amazing Jonathan tells on THE ARISTOCRATS DVD.
...
A man is going to eat dinner with a friend of his he hasn't seen in years. When he gets to the restaurant he sees his friend, but he also sees that his friend has now got this big, round, orange head. So he goes over to the table and says, "Man, it's great to see you, but I gotta' ask: What the hell happened to your head?"
"Well, sit down, let's order some food and I'll tell you the story."
So after they order up some appetizers, the friend starts to tell his story.
"You see, it's like this. I was wandering along a beach one day when I found a lamp. I picked up the lamp and tried to rub some sand off it. When I did, a genie came out of the lamp and offered me three wishes.
"For my first wish, I wished for a million dollars. The genie granted my wish and suddenly I was rich. I was able to invest some of the money and then open up my own business, which has brought me the success I enjoy today.
"My second wish was to meet and fall in love with a beautiful woman. This was how I met my wife, who has shared in my success these many years and with whom I now have two beautiful children.
"The genie was ready to grant my third wish, and this is where I think I went horribly wrong. I wished for a big, round, orange head."
Woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre. So the bartender gave her one.
A man walked into a bar. He should have been watching where he was going.