I just saw this on another forum (just surfing). It looks like it might be fun. We're going to tell a story. The rule is, you can only use 3 words. :teddyr: I'll start........
There once was
a forum where
a member named
Depressed Crack Addict
posted an outrageous
tirade against zombies
As a result
the ground shook
and a monkey
gave the finger
to Babe Ruth
Where's my banana?
and my underwear ...
both lost in
the big hurricane
that also brought
...alien conga dancers ...
to the brink
of destroying Tupperware (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tupperware)
and cannibalism among
the Wookanooba tribe
ate veggie burgers
made of asparagus
and tree mold
which caused them
to watch Se7en
while eating pudding
until they feel
their bowels move
Unfortunately for them
they didn't properly
check for alligators
nudists or gophers
with pointy teeth
Suddenly, a penguin
jumped out and
did the conga
with a goose.
Meanwhile back at
The Bat Cave
Harry Met Sally
at a bar
when a big
bad wolf came
covered in blood
And told them
me need faces
Bartender responded by
coughing up blood
which he drank
A chemical solution
bubbled and fizzed
he burped up
a midget stripper
who was holding
a giant blue
alien anal probe
and turned it
into a snorkel
that smelled of
daisies and tulips
" I had too-
get a whiff
of this beautiful
and magnificent snorkel
Quoth the Raven
"O.K." And then,
the snorkel was
leading the midget
who transformed into
giant killer BREAST .... ( o )( o )
shooting poisonous milk
at the chosen
Mothers Against Drunk
Disciples Of Feminism
themselves drunk on ...
Miller High Life
(http://img396.imageshack.us/img396/1411/miller704cdy0.jpg) (http://imageshack.us)
Given their tenacity
for eating chocolate
and the wrappers
explained their strange
lust for Miller
beer but not
their husbands who
erected large statues
of remote controls
which they used
to change the
mindset of all
which could bring
Armageddon down upon
all who dare
dance the polka
wearing polka dot
trunks Dusty Rhodes
revealed he really
wanted to be
a prima-ballerina.
From a secret
underwater base located
inna old outhouse
( :tongueout:"inna" is one word,in cartoon language)
out behind mamma's
crotchless panty collection.
Giant attacking frogs
used their tongues
equipped with poisonous ...
spam sandwiches and
corn beef hash
to render humans
defenseless against their
own voracious urges
for eating their
own newborn spawn
which was okay
Ole Lizard Lips
Got kissed by
grandpa's pet pig
the pig grew
into a monstrous
Hogzilla with disgusting
bulging red eyes
that shot flames
from its eyesockets
It let out
a abnoxious gas
and began to
fumagate the land
with foul stench.
Robert Young, a
psychotic serial killer
smelled these fumes
and turned into
Michael Jackson the
grand destroyer! He
threw his nose
at the bartender
who then ran
into a phonebooth
where he became
(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/1/18/Princesymbol.png) and proceeded
to kick the
other weird singer
clear to Cucamonga
and back again
but now with
less sugar added.
The ground opened
and spewed forth
liverlipped cockroaches with
cellphones and uzi's
bent on destroying
Starbucks coffee houses
All of a
sudden, giant chickens
fleeing from KFC
with secret spices
disarmed the cockroaches
sprinkled them with
magic pixie dust
which annihilated them.
Gamera the flying
ketchup flavored cop
played cards with
Gigantor the meek
refused to believe
he was once
an underpaid lawyer
So a ghost
rearranged every single
moment in time
and the Doctor
Demento show aired
but was not
clearly heard by
by the probe
installed by martians
in an unknown
crevasse. In darkness,
Uma Thurman danced
and Vincent thought
"Mutant Giant Ants
ate my pants!"
Just then, Alfred
Hitchcock, naked and
hiding from the
composer Bernard Herrmann
100th POST!
BEST POST EVER!
stubbed his toe
and then yelled
Beware the tribbles!
The tribbles began
to gyre and
became dizzy, then
Spock found his
tricorder and used
it to pleasure
the speech centers
of dancing hippos.
Meanwhile, a brown
bloated, and unlikable
tribble gave birth
to Pauly Shore
(a still born)
In the netherworld
the flames roared
and emormous demons
in pink tutus
danced about Azathoth
while Cthulhu read
dirty nursery rhymes
about muddy trolls
hovering over islands
made of bologna.
The demons drooled
eldritch turqoise ichor
upon the head
and balls of
Rosie O'Donnell causing
an enormous eruption
on The View.
A gargling noise
from the Donald
whose hair was
an optical illusion
prepared for Wrestlemania
by throwing Madonna
to the werewolves.
becoming a werewolf
in her cone-bra
Started singing "Vogue"
and dancing the
the whootsi chootsi
Meanwhile, in a
satanic paralell dimension
Ed Wood's Oscar
won for working
on Jail Bait
was brought to
Moonbase Alpha where
it was stolen
and remade into
an Angora sweater
that was irradiated
by flying saucers
attacking from Mars.
Such topics rarely
let your imagination
get really naked
as hideous aliens
slither their tongues
against your leg.
Meanwhile back at
werewolf Madonna's shindig
Donald joined in
a game of
candyland where a fight broke out when
somebody posted seven
nude photos of
Rich's boo boo
exciting werewolf Madonna
which caused her
bloodlust to rise
and she began
her search for
her .357 magnum
and killed herself.
Meanwhile, in Guam
Madonna's ghost appeared
in a taco
bell restaurant howling
for Turkish, who
smeared honey on
the script to
Snatch, a movie
oddly not about
purple people eaters
But Captain Kangaroo
who had risen
from the grave
to feast upon
Mr. Greenjean's brains
pork and potatoes
too. "Bring me
my pipe, dear."
Martian eyes watched
nervously, from behind
Mr. Moose's tail
which let out
a time warp
of a fart
that took everyone
back to the
dawn of man
where they discovered
Donald Trump's hair
which was eating
Donald Trump. Midgets
came in droves
and offered their
Troll 2 memorabilia
to Rosie, who
ate it all.
Meanwhile, back at
Radio Ranch, Gene
LeBell grappled a
a large Gwangi
and shook it.
1,500 lumpy headed
babies with mutated
forked reptile tongues
greedily licked certain
rare copies of
Randy Newman's last
hit single, while
their heads grew
extra sets of
big pink earlobes.
All the better
to squirt ear-wax
at the thing
turning it into
a wax golem,
which rampaged through
Las Vegas, Nevada
in search of
girls gone wild.
Willie Nelson, the
Key Master of
the planet BOOGINVIKA
blew his nose
and hacked up
a huge cockroach
with a beard
kinda like ZZ Topp's,
hungry eyes, huge
claws that could
not pick up
the dropped soap.
Above looking down
sat the most
hideous orangutan who
licked large lollipops
(http://img354.imageshack.us/img354/4141/whirlykz6.jpg) (http://imageshack.us)
while scratching its
coconuts that hung
from his pierced
Monkey F@ck Stick (courtesy Bad Santa)
As time passed
this story got
More absurd than
FREAKS. The End.
In the remake :bouncegiggle:
Ugandan Giant Kamala
was selected to
totally wipe out
low alcohol beer
The remake, directed
by Clint Eastwood
and written by
Clint Howard, the
brother of Ron
, who has not
achieved the fame
of Ed Wood
In the cave
there lurked a
nasty attack hamster
infected with scurvy
but loved to
paint her toenails
with the deposits of Trevor's underpants
that she found
behind her uncle's
vibrating toilet seat
,he was a
retired Kyrgyzstanian yak herder
upon hearing that
gerbils make good
after dinner mints,
when eating brains
,he went out
to a local
canine slaughterhouse, where
cats flocked vengefully,
and sexually assaulted
Thirteen Midget Sorcerers. .
cast defensive spells...
but unfortunately forgot
to say please...
to the magic
elf that was
eating anchovies and
grabbing midgit heads
which he pickled
spicy rooster's testicles
all night long
with Rip Taylor
and Rip Torn
While Buddy Epsen
mounted a camel
and road to
Sc**thorpe in England
They bought hookers
to play cards
and throw feces
at spanish monkeys
related to Cher
When that ended
Amy Weinhouse performed
oral sex on
a dead bigfoot
that turned out to be a frozen rubber costume in . . .
Paris Hilton's personal . . .
Californian jail cell.
"Galoshes are yummy!",
said Cthulhu's followers.
Brains taste better
when mixed with
pinto beans and jalopenos
but cause hemorrhoids
to mutate and explode
which explained the origin of Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen
A proctologist arrived
but then refused
to remove his
My Little Pony
which was coated . . .
with BBQ sauce.
and phlegm, with
chunks of greasy
mermaid fallopian tubes.
Meanwhile, Jackie Chan
started to grow...
a third eye
on his duodenum.
however his endoscopy
indicated a small alien life form . . .
named Hildegard Fenstermacherson
Hildegard grabbed a
potato chip resembling the likeness of the Virgin Mary
and tossed it
(REMEMBER...only 3 words per reply in this thread please. Go back to the very first post and read it)
with eerie gusto
*********************
Isn't this a rule of this thread, also?
(http://i161.photobucket.com/albums/t214/morrisawilliams/pj463b1h.jpg)
into the waiting flames of Hell...
Meanwhile on Uranus,
huge deposits of
flying, flaming, remnants
. . . of Tim Conway . . .
morphed and mutated into tiny pieces of..
a larger device
programmed to kill
Tony Danza's libido
restoring universal harmony....
to all the
pot smoking hippies.
Meanwhile, Telly Savalas . . .
ate some cheese
that made him
so constipated that
he took a
fork and spoon
and inserted them . . .
into Vanessa Del Rio's
large, jewel encrusted
McDonald's souvenir cup.
filled to overflowing
with slave urine
that's only good
mixed with olives.
Popeye threw up
massive chunks of
3-legged frogs
all over Bluto
then Olive Oyl
rubbed olive oil
on the sweaty
pair of testicles
that belonged to
Rowdy Roddy Piper
Suddenly, Hulk Hogan
took part in this direct-to-video sploshing movie.
inspiring universal apathy...
in a group
of B-movie fans
who all hated
low frequency sound...
emitting from Madonna's
large heated crotch
defying all logic...
, laws of physics
basic common sense...
and several ordinances
destroying midgets and
broiling all chickens
during mating season
causing egg shortages...
stale chicken mcnuggets,
and sales of
Britney Spears CD's.
So they decided
to burn all
bootlegged copies of
Regis Philbin's explicit
sex panther video
with some napalm.
That being done,
the cast of
Eight Is Enough
bought flying monkeys
wholesale, because Dick
had an itch
to find Toto
and skin him
, but didn't have
a butter knife
so he took
a nuclear warhead
and rammed it :buggedout:
into Rob Halford's
motorcycle exhuast shaft :teddyr:
while he sang
Baby Got Back
with special guest
Blind Melon Chitlin
who had been
shaving of their
armpit hair for
use as a
special seasoning for
italian chicken breast
washed down with
human urine and
toxic waste :teddyr: from
my personal stash.
"Mmmm, tastes like
tapeworms", said the
Professor Satchafunkilus who,
unbeknownst to his
classroom of ghouls
was about to
be initiated into
the dark, desolate
sanitarium of the
most high holy
order of transvestite
known to mankind
. The ceremony involves
making kissy-faces
whilst dressed in
a tutu and
jumbo bikini and
white cowboy boots
and juggling seven
greasy spanish midgets
while standing on
a camel's back
, one then recites
klatu...barata...nectcoughcoughcough....
whilst drinking water
directly from your
child's bubble bath
as long as
you could manage
the floating particles
that the brotherhood
of travelling pants
left in there
with a gigantic
box full of
flying, flaming, remnants
which temporarily blinded
all of the
members of Menudo
After they recovered,
they had a
pepperoni and marmalade
feast before engaging
in naked charades
in memory of
Bigfoot And Wildboy
who had sadly
fled the country
due to a
unfortunate misunderstanding involving
the Dade county
Sheriff's Department, led
valiantly if misguidedly...
to a full
frontally nude attack
on a beaver
with Turret's Syndrome
howling madly, intermittently...
spewing unspeakably filthy...
$#!&&% hymns. Meanwhile,
Xena and Gabrielle
, two unemployed warriors
who made money
as poultry inspectors
had an idea
that involved stripping
the paint off
Burt Reynold's old
solid gold tricycle
using a mexican
wrestler managed by
the ghost of
Jim Neighbors' sister's
next door neighbor
"Marvelous" Marvin Hagler
Jr., the less
talented brother of
Anthony Michael Hall
and his cousin
Benicio Del Toro
who all jumped
down into the
crack of dark
,dark, midget hearts
beating blood eternally,
which is drank
by the giant
purple Teletubby and
his smaller lover
Bullwinkle's friend Rocky
whose real name
is Michael Hunt
of Angel Beach
. He lives with
his mother and
several wild raccoons
behind the old
wooden bike shed
where they store
hairy brazil nuts
and big golden
hunting knives that
for some reason
could talk when
dipped in guacamole.
Julia Child exclaimed...
"NOW THAT'S A
good tv dinner
and everybody went
to Taco Bell
where a battle
of cheese and
short order cooks
caused a large
mandingo to explode
yielding the unsavory
taste of creamy
artificial butter flavoring
causing an outbreak
of yellow fever
in Clay Aiken's
stop-motion closet
which was home
to one large
manikin named Barbie
beloved of few...
resented by many.
"This is ridiculous!"
Shouted Arnold Palmer
even though he
himself was often
setting fire to
sandwiches, jello molds,
doll houses, babies,
old women and
Estelle Getty's teeth
, but only when
he had discovered
the secret place
the government constructed
to hide the
Gary Coleman robot
and the evil
Emmanuel Lewis cyborg
that shot lasers
out of his
shiny left buttock
They fought off
a dehydrated mule
which reeked of
Rosie O'Donell's bathwater
and fourteen different
brands of cheap
fruit scented shampoos
used by Steve
Urkel who didn't
read the labels
on biohazard samples
turning him into
a cross between
Rapunzel and a
10ft cuddly toy
that began a
fluffy rampage through
a city comprised
of drunken Ewoks
shooting a porno
with Misty Mundae
some wild stallions,
1986 Chicago Bears,
the Seven Dwarfs,
and Jerry Stiller.
The religious right
wing group, the
Holy Sh*t Soldiers
were listening to
their Stryper albums
Soldiers Under Command,
strafed record players...
and then ate
a tenor saxophone
, just because it
gave them gas
which could be
used against enemies...
, although that might
potentially backfire and
cause massive explosions
leaving only a
giant crater and
post partum depression
tempered his lethargy...
and caused his
visual time keeping
to fast forward
thrusting the world
into post apocalyptic
chaos, where desolate
Kmarts serve as
smart places to
spank the monkey...
and strangle the
numerous zombie-like
chickens, let loose
from KFC headquarters
by the evil
Frank Perdue. "It
is the dawning...."
"of fowl times"
, said the punny
marshmallow Peep bunny.
He sadly died,
after eating tainted
gummi worms which
poisoned his gut,
ate his brains,
and turned him
a sickly shade
of poop brown.
. He was buried
while still breathing
in a large
Pez dispenser with
Andrew "Dice" Clay
Eulogies were read
by Gilbert Gottfried
inay igpay atinlay
which was subtitled
you sick piece
of toe cheese
I hope you...
sprout pubic hair
and ingest some
pine cone salad
whilst you burn
in a toaster
located in Hell!
Meanwhile, back at
the old ranch
water seeped unseen....
causing blood farmers
to escape in
upside down helicopters...
piloted by agents
dedicatd to discord...
all reasonable thought
causing a crash
in stock markets
angering Gordon Gekko :hatred:
breaking red braces...
, having no lunch,
yet still hungry...
"Braaiins," said the
producers of "Survivor:
desperate turd eaters"
Which required fifty
Lionel Richie clones
who all sang
"Can't Slow Down"
in slow motion
backwards to a
accordian and piccolo
, this hypnotized the
evil school teachers
demanding pay raises
and better lunches
for albino parrots
. They also insisted
on playing chinese
checker with Maria
Conchita Alonso, the
deadly scourge of
New Mexico's largest
Chucky Cheese, who
went on a
very sexy mission
impregnating young fertile
Vulcans, who enjoy
living on mars
, sex with Quato
and spawning mutant
venereal diseases named
crazy lips Earl
that impaired ability
to play guitar
with your feet
, putting many bands
like Grim Reaper
out of commission
so they resorted
the gates of
Heck, where the
fat hell spawn
ate Devil Dogs
, recharging their power
. Billy Ocean said,
"Excuse me but
your car is
in my dreams
. Would you mind
stepping out please?
Los Angeles police
arrived with doughnuts
filled with creamy
south american cockroaches,
while CHiPS shot
very manly poses.
and poured lubricant
over Jimmy Smits
which Dennis Franz
licked off seductively
. This was filmed
by Michael Bay
with needless CGI
,bland dumb teens,
shaky camera angles,
and way too
many one liners.
The critics loved
to hate it,
the excessive explosions
and the midgets
, Lebouf's crippled hand
all received a
large supply of
unstoppable laughter that,
made unintentional comedy
the new buzz
among lactose intolerant
and obsessive compulsive
nose pickers was
breeding like wildfire.
making them a
blue cardigan sweater
for Mr. Rogers
insane uncle, who
ripped badgers faces
off and placed
them in bras
marketing them as
new and improved
versions of the
silicon breast implants
to the delight
of "Baywatch" fans
and Pamela Anderson :twirl:
, whose old ones
weren't big enough!!
So David Hasslehoff
got himself a
big squishy pair
of hairy swingers
and tied their
bristly tails together
and called them
fatty fatty boombalatti
because they were
kind of tubby,
and a tad
on the portly
side and had
strands of boombalatti
hanging down into
their evil hungry
mouths, which already
were full of
giant mouse traps
baited with yummy
yummy pepperjack cheese
and frog sandwiches
but needing beer
painstakingly brewed by
unwashed orcs using
grease and sweat
, lust and shame
broccoli and steak,
and chocolate nuts.
Wiping the sweat
off of hairy,
German women's armpits
was the new
celebrity fad diet
for Bon Jovi
who's current hit
"corporate richboy p***y"
written by Mr.
T. and Tina
Fey and produced
by Fred Durst
and Quincy Jones's
emotionally disturbed ex-
husband, Rick James
who did coke
And Dr. Pepper . . .
with mountain dew
and whipped cream
and several dobermen
pinschers with weird
eyes that looked
three directions simultaneously
and shot bees.
Then the acid
chimp lost his
virginity to a
extremely flaming gay
chipmunk wearing purple
lace stockings with
a lace bustier
soaked in gasoline
and some VASILINE. .
, he became pregnant
and had a
clandestine operation to
infiltrate the IRS
so he could
write off his
foundation garment purchases
of his All-Transvestite
discount garment store
as extraordinary business
due to the
rising cost of
scented body paints
created by Richard
Dean Anderson who's
off shore accounts
were used to
fund rebels from
several unknown areas
of parts unknown,
in any contemporary
field of dreams
meanwhile back at
the robot factory
power went out
halting the plans
to build intelligent
Pitchfork music reviewers.
The chorus sang
"spanish monkey lover"
in Gaelic while
giving the finger
to the qur'an
which caused Imams
to declare jihad
on Sesame Street
which made Oscar
and Big Bird
break out RPG's
and go apes**t!
They fired rockets
out of their
nostrils, while Elmo
jumped up and
yanked a speedo
effeminately worn by
Burt Reynolds. He
had shaved beforehand
with a machete
, it was bloody
like a tampon
with heavy discharge
and crusty fragments
of rectum sausage
from last week's
intestinal meat festival.
The festival was
very popular with
vampire horses from
the Bollywood film
"Delhi Cheerleader Zombies"
starring Kim Kardashian
who's giant booty
received second billing.
Theater goers rioted
and threw feces
while the ushers
read "Paradise Lost"
the abridged version
and knew not
why dwarves belch.
within the caverns
flying, flaming, remnants
spun off from
Marv Albert's toupee
destroying a schoolbus
full of nuns
and gun-toting kids
on their way
to the Republican
strip poker night.
Meanwhile Beaver Cleaver
was sharpening his
wit against Wally
who sometimes hit
200 kph in
his rusted landspeeder
, the one bought
on bad credit
from Janet Reno
who's facial hair
is actually caused
by mysterious alien
Spam that tastes
like ass and
cheesz wiz with
salad dressing and
soiled cat litter.
However, the new
season of Survivor
is situated on
Mars because the
martians needed women
to create a
new flavor of
slimy spermicidal lubricant
to be used
as a preservative
in fast food
and your mom's
soggy Depends diapers
which don't fit
Janet Reno. The
Martians then bought
rights to Beatles
memorabilia, including the
left elbow of
Ringo Starr's pet
one eyed flying
weasel from Russia
and John's soiled
purple penis pump
and Paul's wooden
Yoko wacking stick
and George's slimy
crusty, hairy, bumpy
blood soaked left
penis from the
from the tenth
alternate alien dimension
where humans were
kept for their
valuable skin which
randomly sprouted organs
capable of recording
non-verbal communications of
wombats in heat
it became the
most popular form
of adult entertainment
since sliced bread
which is amazing
because it aroused
Sir Cliff Richard
and Elton John
to co-author ballads
about pork fellatio
performed by the
severed heads of
Rick Astley and
Edward James Olmos.
Atlantic dumped them
and picked up
Manilla Rice instead
because of the
ability of the
who's smash hit
altered time immeasurably...
by causing medieval
peasants to become
restive and rebellious...
so riot control
panthers were sent
with large polyester
nipple rings from
J Edgar Hoover's
secret garden of
man eating plants
which Richard Simmons
had grown in
a giant vat
in an abandoned
dirty gay bathhouse
stalked by the
gay pride parade
which collided with
a 50ft twinkie
creating great joy
for fat Albert
who's giant belly
exploded in orgasmic
ecstasy, covering everyone
in chocolate fudge
stale banana custard...
and disgusting entrails :buggedout:
which rained over
the equestrian team
who were practicing
for the prestigious
hard butt race
from Catalina to
Calcutta where Bollywood
stars gathered for
the Hari Puttar
superstar porn festival
. The main attraction
was sleeping with
Rev. Powell, because
he had a
great big, ruddy
ego he named
Willy because it
reminded him of
a snake he
stuffed into his
Christmas turkey with
a Rolex watch
and some fuzzy
old man scrotum,
three full beers,
two turtledoves and a
Partridge family member
who cried out...
"Take me now, Mr.
Herman, here in
front of the
Iraqi parliament building
, so that the
neighbours will think
that I've been
choking my chicken
McNuggets down, along with
some grape flavored
cough syrup that
caused my rectum
to whistle a chorus of
'close to you'
and "These Dreams"
. Suddenly a flash
inspired great curiosity....
about Mr. Rogers
and his vast collection
of amphibian curiosities...
in certain species
toxic and benevolent...
or hostile and
horny, but the
newts withstood intervention....
by the United Nations
who wielded large
pond exploration submersibles....
that rapidly fired
nerf balls and
incinerated lily pads...
into the gullet
of marauding baracudas....
and one surly mackerel
, then caught by
tuna unfriendly dolphins....
amed whit shotguns...
patrol seedy reefs...
where jacques cousteau
once had his way with
Aqualad and his
pampered personal manatee...
causing a tsunami
that nearly destroyed
flying, flaming, remnents
of my shattered
womb that once
carried the girth
of alarmingly large
limbs of Oprah
who upon birth
voted for McCain
famous chip manufacturer...
that implanted microchips
in the boobs
of overweight wrestlers...
that slammed through
the gable end....
of Montrose F.C.
defeated Hamilton Accies...
and saved the
Forfar bridies vendor....
from hostile takeovers
by tiny mutated
perineums, created by
unusual interactions between
Ted Sorel and
renegade Triffids that
scared everyone inside
Richard Simmons' rectum
, thus meaning weight
control was forced
into maximum overdrive
causing salad bars
to close in
which made vegans
turn to cannibalism...
and a lot of sodomy
,however the dolphins
were more inclined to
ram intimidating sharks....
while singing a
chorus of
Important national anthems....
played on 8-tracks...
relayed by cables....
until the government
organised a bailout...
of the overextended
sonic echo market...
Meanwhile, at the
Soylent Green factory,
workers were protesting
fat farms, McDonalds
preservatives in their
cream of wheat, and
new FDA regulations
required 100% humans
in every jar of
Skippy Peanut Butter
but prohibited the
use of toenail
fungus in
crunchy peanut butter
baby food
for maritime export...
to Matool Island
to photograph okapis...
wearing underpants
on his head...
with skid marks
and crusty
fragments of Madonna's
mystifying mass appeal....
to dimwitted bar
attending pachinko players..
who voted for
Chuck Norris to
moon
NASCAR fans at
Royal command performances....
attended by Prince
and the revolution
disrupted Royal Ascot...
and planted a
pine tree in
the Inner Hebrides.....
under the watchful
eye of orion...
Pictures Corporation president
Michael Hunt who
smelled kind of
worn and irritated...
by the constant
rhythm of drums....
and maracas
playing howler monkeys....
who ran screaming
to their mommy
needing urgent condolences...
but received a
spanking instead. Still,
the zombie army
marched slowly up
Brokeback Mountain's slopes.....
much to the chagrin
of telepathic beavers...
who choked on
huge, oily chunks of
cheap, decaying tuna....
and dolphin meat
kept barracudas satisfied...
during mating season
inviting problematic overpopulation....
which led to
angelfish numbers dwindling....
in seafood resteraunts
limiting Japanese interest...
in b*****e films
without affecting Gamera...
who was vacationing
at Godzilla's villa....
unbeknownst to Kenny
Ghidorah smelled scandal...
featuring Patti Smyth
Because the night...
belongs to lovers
vampire bait incarnate....
is chili con carne
with tabasco sauce...
and a whole
curry powder packet....
and a pinch
of Martin Short.
All Three Amigos....
started peeling
overripe bananas
with their butts
which made the
tacos go off...
inside the fridge
while the Jello
diseased penguins lurked.....
in the bathtub
with a rubber
jam jar opener...
and extremely elongated
genitalia
well hung from
their sweaty armpits
for all to
admire and envy
just like the
ornate ornamental archways.....
found in rural
areas of Harlem
where the Globetrotters
took on the
Washington Generals...again...
whooping their sorry
mothers with a
covered in graffiti....
toolbox filled with
used condoms from
the YMCA
club, run by
sex crazed aliens
from the planet
Mira/Omicron Ceti
where masturbation with
dead sperm whales
is strictly enforced
on penalty of
having your pubes
eaten on pizza
. The planet's president
Bobcat Goldthwait announced
an intergalactic party
featuring Pat Boone and
the musical raisins,
which was boycotted
by the anthropomorphic
giant jelly beans
, they had lasers
which fired potatoes
and spanish uncles
who cried out
"Yo quiero Taco Bell!"
The uncles fell
into a pile
of fat goats
and cannibal cows
and they found
the meaning of
male pattern baldness
so they invented
pubic harvesting machines
which caused fatalities
In South Korea
which prompted Confucius
to utter the phrase:
"Mama's little baby loves shortnin' bread."
Dr.Phil was displeased,
especially after being
sued for sexual
harrassment by King
Canute's damp galoshes...
after that unfortunate business
with the toilet plunger
draining his moat....
which was clogged
with expired summer sausage
everyone lost weight
and vomited explosively
on Oprah's hips
which contained WMD
grade mashed potatoes....
and Huey Lewis.
Sir John Gielgud was
then shot dead,
with rubber bands
with his remains
gang raped by
Carl Weathers and
a tap-dancing Cher
inside the tower
Isengard because of
daylight savings time
had meant the
ring stopped glowing....
ending the bitter
debate over circularity....
, singularity, jocularity and
politics of dancing.
A totalitarian state
of eternal bliss
occurred when Elvis
returned from the
Dairy Queen with
a frozen Frank
on his head,
spouting religious nonsense
and scratching madly at
Priscilla's great big
heaving plastic mounds
of silly string
coated trouser presses
. But that was only
the beginning of
this shocking tale,
a tale of
two cities, which
involved Detroit and
Zombietown, where the
chopper chicks had
hosted a barbecue
in a nightclub
owned by Xerxes
who was really
constipated and
a little tipsy.
They cooked wings
from dead angels
and dipped them in
the blood of
the jersey devil
to prepare for
the coming of
Rosie O'Donnell
beloved by mutitudes....
of chechen rebels
because she always
finished her afters...
before her starters
but then farted
hurricane force winds....
that smelt of
cheeseburgers and hair,
rancid burning rubber...
and giraffe feces.
Leopards were amused....
but tigers were
bewildered by ocelots....
trapped under ice
until Rosie's gas
thawed out a
giant hotdog, which
fell ontop of
Morey Amsterdam's
father's, sister's house
. In other words,
a typical Christmas
for the incouragible
Red state dweller...
in the darkness
of blue triumphalism...
and orange Crush
flowed like water....
down Vampira's
love pillows which
started to look
quite enticing to
The DarkSider and
Janet Reno
who sadly bit
a rancid lemon....
, causing her to exclaim
NO MORE CITRUS......
FRUITS SPIKED WITH
weapons grade tequilla....
while dancing the
MAMBO, YOU MOTHER
OF TEARS!" This
made water supplies
dry up, leading
to mouth fungus
that Circus cured :teddyr:
with Windex and
hot milf action
and milk action
and Jagger satisfaction,
and Spam.
This lead to
a talking shoebox
taking over
Martha's Vineyard while
Antonio Banderas
had his butt
romanced by
Michael Douglas's's's's' chin
stubble. The extra
skin removed was
made into
a lampshade, which
cracked on impact...
with Gary Glitter
on the yardarm....
of a three-masted...
pair of panties
of Linda Blair's
lover, who was
also Linda Blair
not actually possessed.....
but just horny
enough to promise...
she would always
apply maximum effort...
when making love
before a mirror...
with Circus Circus. :teddyr:
Acrobats were appalled...
by this freakshow
,performing chimps whimpered....
to the sound
of mediocre ska-punk...
while mouseketeer Annette
toiling on saxophone...
farted into a
previously inert windsock...
which inflated enough
to dwarf airliners...
with a stink strong enough to
put Rosie O'Donnell off her lunch....
but not off
her afternoon snack...
of bull gonads and
sauteed goat livers...
blended in milk.
Huey Lewis vomited
another crappy song
about the power
of infernal serpents....
spitting multitudes of rainbows
spanning mountainous vistas....
into the devil's
demented, festering pit...
of butterscotch pudding
lurked a megalodon
ravenous with hunger....
and filled with
yummy, gooey cheezeflixz
, searching for the
oracle of ingenuity....
to help plan
fascist kindergarten classes
for sea cucumbers
in the giant
basin formed by
krang's foot soldiers
awaiting shelled vengeance...
by one angry
severely aggrieved terrapin....
capable of taking
down marauding okapis....
in the southern
end of a northbound
crystalline galactic freighter....
piloted by sentient
crystalline galactic freighters
, intercepted on route
to Andromeda Central....
stopping the meeting
of two comets...
bringing about sonic
repercussions throughout history....
and next Tuesday morning
when Summer Glau
traversed the beyond......
and penetrated the behind
sending Ted Sorel
out for doughnuts...
with no money
only expired vouchers....
for tainted oysters
causing gastric ructions....
among several Rabbis
theological tropes abounded....
but the Papal
Edict rendered ineffectual....
all Charo's efforts
to rid herself of unsightly
wild body hair
attracting sweaty bonobos....
that were doing
the Charleston
dazzling confused flappers...
who had lost
interest in leaving...
skidmarks
on the floor
of city hall
with a lawnmower
but instead decided
to putrify the
municipal strawberry patch....
while whistling
Wham's "Last Christmas"....
under 10-feet of
cool, still water...
with watery tarts
repulsing potential customers...
buying baked whistles
,raucous football rattles.....
and meat helmets
for emergencies only....
Meanwhile,
winter dragged on...
into June
Polar Bears tobogganed...
down maidens' backsides,
which made them
alert passing lightships....
so they could
dump their loads
in secluded lagoons...
displacing toxic goblins
with translucent amoebas...
causing an environmental
crisis concerning toxins....
within the blood
supply of mastodons...
hammering on drums
similodons playing sax....
and triceratops tooting
on a hobo
retuning a flugelhorn...
while drinking Ripple
effects in time...
machine travel in
molecularly dense cluster...
that caused temporary
abnormal wave patterns...
in gorilla orgasms
measured by Dr. Menard
with his assistant
sweeping molted fur...
knidly mowed a
patch of dandelions....
releasing millions of
mysterious, illuminated spores
lighting the way
for shining petals....
to go where
bionic matter feared...
to tread because
Don Dokken shouted
causing dimensional upheavals...
of yesterday's dinner
gastric bloating intensified....
during George Lynch's
multi-faceted elevenses...
that screamed through
packed dining halls....
with nerds, jocks
chavs, neds, antidisestablishmentarianists...
and me. A
relieved calm followed....
Cain into the
fallout shelter
until David Banner
required atomic salvation...
and became unlikable
verdant hues of rage...
, which was odd
beige was always more his colour....
in women's underware
curry binges notwithstanding.....
because his gas
threatened biological meltdown...
within JC Pennys
rapidly defrosting freezers....
prompting Christmas shoppers
into curtailed transactions....
causing the collapse
of Amy Winehouse's hair
which bankrupted producers
ability to reason...
had slipped away
into a pool
of Coca-Cola
,weak, flat, Tizer....
and nostril drippings
enhance the disgust...
of tapeworm harvesting
in my head
triggering disturbing migraines....
and dreams featuring
singing harlequin koalas....
going on quests
for eucalyptus groves...
where coffee addicts
glugged endless lattes....
and mounds of biscotti
avoiding gnocci scrupulously....
meanwhile back at
Moonbase Alpha
Dr. Loudermilk hacked
up an enormous
wad of slimy
toilet paper
building a bridge
from Mars to Mercury....
to do battle
against Galactic Templers....
and smelly troglodytes
disturbing Venusian Trachodons...
in the middle of dinner
mutton went rancid....
and stank of
rotting tractor tyres....
and cat farts
created festering mists.....
of green tinged
radioactive smog flooding
neon washed metropolis...
of Ft. Dix
elite heavy lasers...
repeatedly blasted the
exposed buttocks of
raucous, abrasive hippies...
and cranky old
beatniks, who were
drumming without purpose....
on a porpoise
with gay tendencies
for surfer dudes
who surfed on
vast seas of treacle....
and custard
raspberry jam volcanos....
with whipped cream
and a cherry
atop coconut suace....
and sprinkles
sultanas and prunes.....
over the feet
of beguiled revellers....
travelling to Krull.
to gaze upon
rusting, fragged slayers....
festooned with underpants
in frilly couture-fashion
Bennett sisters prowled...
the bowels of
Beast's black fortress
the iron gate opened...
to reveal three
rather ugly princesses
their names were
Rev. Powell, DarkSider, doggett... :teddyr:
, then Queen Circus
arrived in a red and white dress
and gold lame pumps
accented by real
beef gravy
making his feet
attract stray dogs
scaring feral cats....
and lowering property values
in Dade County
which is close to
the gravity well of David Caruso
making Circus rich. :teddyr:
Circus decided against
going to see "Bride of
Postman Pat's Doppelganger"....
as it starred
Bill Nighy and
Rachael Evan Wood
directed by
Uwe Boll's campanologist....
with creature effects by
a crippled chimp
flinging poo
at sexy nurses
whilst constructing armatures....
out of discarded
dirty junkie needles.
They all took
purple micro dot
male enhancement pills
causing follicle depletion.....
within pubic regions
of surviving neanderthals....
-and elusive Bigfeet-
(that's the plural form of Bigfoot) :lookingup:
started wearing sandals.....
-and listening to old Donovan records-
cruising in camper vans....
through downtown LA
rapper commemorated in rhyme....
messing about with the rules of time
standing in line
swingin' on a vine
feeling in their prime....
yo, yo.....word.
Footprint veracity was questioned....
Steve Martin was sectioned...
enough was enough....
but times were tough...
practically living rough
affected by dandruff....
being a scruff
with one hancuff
covered in fluff
but he still looked buff
off the cuff....
with Brian Clough
in a huff....
at pointless stuff
having a puff
of some snuff
word up G...
wearing an earmuff....
not looking so tough
sounding slightly gruff.....
falling in luff
looking exteremly duff....
with a powder puff
I think that's enough
it's reached the edge of the bluff.....
wearing thin is this stuff
STOP FREAKING RYHMING!!!!!
Frustration is climbing.....
thats good timing
MAKE IT STOP!!!!!!!!!! :hatred:
Must it drop?
like a cop
let it drop.....
on top of Pop
making him hop....
like a bunny
in a strop
to find a cop
yielding a crop....
of premium hops
known to cops....
as a top hop crop
the bunny then
nibbled fresh parsnips.....
while it was waiting for
the sea-kittens to
give the
sailor
a hand
with the lobsters
fry in batter.....
with marshmallows and
Twizzlers
mechanically recovered protein....
from rotting tuna
sold as salmon....
to a travelling...
maharaja
on his way to
elephant polo practice....
for a showdown
between obese pigeons
over ivory profits.....
of dollar stores
selling plastic frogmen....
rash enducing lipstick,
malodorous lavender perfume,
expired generic Twinkies,
decade expired dogfood.....
mercury infested toys,
condemmed lead paint.....
and potted meat
the address was
west of Kansas
amid sprawling plains....
to the left of the raptor nest
Nigel Marven pontificated.....
about where his career
went on ITV....
, wondering why no
terrapins heeded 'Action'.....
when told
AHEM!!
Sorry for the interruption but...
The reason I haven't posted in this thread lately is because you're only supposed to respond with 3 WORDS!
Almost everyone here has been breaking that golden rule.
Responding in only 3 words is what makes this ongoing story interesting. And it forces you to be creative.
So please. THREE WORDS ONLY!!
Thank you. :smile:
Meerkat level adulation.....
due to Ash's
:teddyr:
interruption with a
rules related warning....
Children should not
pet ravenous wolverines.....
unless they are
dancing with tears
in the wild....
of South Africa
hyenas cowered at....
the sight of
line dancing hippos...
watching Mumma Mia
in growing despair....
of the fact
the eternal loop...
sing-a-long
shrill and cacophonous....
, but better than
sex and steak
with ABBA fans
challenging Johnny Rotten.....
with raw eggs
and raspberry jam...
up his nose
to make him
vomit popsicle sticks
and fire out
Tic Tacs from
his tummy button....
and sold them
as detergent pellets....
for gummy bears
at half price
but still exorbitant....
for that crap
it would be
scientifically exposed as.....
a scheme to
merchandise monkey poo
in microwaved dinners
'Nut and Banana Surprise'.....
which came with
ketchup and tabasco....
in moldy socks
rejected by binmen....
but savoured by
toilet hugging drunks
vacationing in Denver
for a convention
featuring Lou Ferrigno
hawking green paint....
and Amway products
for inhalation use
by migrating Lapwings....
during mating season
for scientific purposes
related to ornithology....
but somehow related
to applied chromatography....
of the Zuzu
foundational social structures....
which can include
matriarchal family structures....
of killer bees
and also the
Loyal Fraternity of
The Minions of
Really Bad Guys
who like to
seeki galactic hegemony....
using their power
of 80's rock
90's Britpop nostalgia....
and 2000's melodrama
depressed target nationalities....
and Cheez Whiz
served with pickle.....
juice mixed with
lime and coconuts
Cinnamon flavoured pastry.....
topped with cyanide
and a hint
of undiluted arsenic.....
which made supermarkets
hesitant to stock
high energy yellow.....
cake mix because
E numbers abounded.....
causing management strikes
union related discordancy....
disgurntled coupon users,
and general malaise
in Smurf communities.
Meanwhile, back at
Weather Control Incorporated.....
the colossal outpouring
of grief for
of coastal sleet.....
was complicated by
Hugh Jackman's armpits
requiring deodorizing urgently.....
via intravenous line
from a carrier.....
pigeon named Alfred
and his trusty
favourite reconnaissance falcon.....
Johnny Foreigner, who
ate peculiar meats.....
and funny shaped
defrosted potato waffles....
smothered in lots
of banana custard....
topped with a
little tabasco sauce....
which makes it
taste like clams
that have been
marinating in urine
for three years.....
in a port-a-potty
near a bar....
that served orange
crush with sandwiches....
made with cartilage
and pork offcuts.....
that was closed
by environmental health....
due to pubes
in the salad
and the smell
of used elastoplasts.....
which were found
in the mayo
covering up evidence.....
of employee love
between a sheep
and adoring Collie....
who liked to
gnaw on skeletons.....
made of rubber
eventually bursting them....
into Bea Arthur's
irish stew pot.....
making Greedo vomit
large, psychedelic chunks.....
into Chewbacca's lap
holed brown bags....
causing sticky floors
rancor monster slippages......
which made Jabba
sickened and disappointed
even when Leia
swore undying affection....
to Tom Hanks
only when 'Big'.....
was describing his
piano prancing diplomas.....
and shrimp knowledge
made a splash....
on deserted islands
warming to volleyballs.....
decorated with grass
topped by gnome....
filled lacy underwear
on prominent display......
for the customers
of Piggly Wiggly
putting some off.....
the established trail
past ivory cherubims.....
and inflatable seraphim
decorating eleysian gridirons.....
with non-euclidean geometry
reinforcing Pythagoras' theorem.....
and completely discrediting
applied string theory.....
making SAT scores
irrelevant as indicators......
of premature ejaculation
in marine mammals
inhabiting southern latitudes.....
for health reasons
as there was
a flatulence epidemic
among wild antelopes....
who were causing
Heaven & Hell
to party together
like Bill and
Ben's little weed.....
flavored ice cream
now with capers
and a free
bottle of Ripple
and a pack
of wild dogs
guaranteed to kill
hard fighting rhinos.....
with plastic cutlery
and disposable doilies.....
that morphed into
flying, flaming, remnants
former foreign legionnaires.....
of which there
was no evidence....
to prove that
undetected audio frequencies....
can cause certain
within farming communities
within migration patterns.....
and within contraceptives
modest population growth......
within reason. On
several holiday weekends
within the forthcoming
epoch of reorganization....
which lead to
Scatman Crothers' resurrection
via electrodes affixed
perilously near to....
his left testicle
unprotected by pants.....
which he was
unrelentingly protective towards.....
since his childhood
in a little
plutonium mining hamlet.....
where there was
no acute shortage.....
of Spiceworld DVDs
All Saints posters.....
Jim Davidson autographs...
John Virgo's cue.....
cards he read
with noticeable disinterest.....
in Brazilian waxing
warmed by hirsute...
Antarctic synchronized swimmers
who failed to
wipe thoroughly after
spilling grapefruit juice
over their chests
of pirate treasure
buried by Captain
Birdseye's fisheries advisor.....
as he was
looting the restruant's
spare breadcrum supply.....
to feed the
local giraffe calves....
bacon double cheeseburgers
garnished with tandoori....
soaked in tabasco
fried in batter....
with mint garnish
chocolate ice cream....
and monosodium glutamate
Meanwhile in North
seal eating penguins
vomited up gobs
of defrosting poultry.....
that was meant
to be for
aircraft canopy tests
when shot from
a high altitude.
Migrating microscopic swans......
were slaughtered for
Nomadic pizza toppings
served at funerals
for unwashed manatee
activists betraying dolphins.....
which infuriated Neptune
inflamed bloated hemorrhoids
on cliff divers....
bloody battered bodies
superbly deep fried
in hot marzipan
and Quaker State
for extra flavor
and extra sizzle
plus enhanced succulence....
and extreme juiciness
tongue-tickling spiciness
and extreme crunch.
Breakfast was never....
suppose to exist
because Toucan Sam
in moldy underpants
swiped the granola....
across his butt
rippling the skin...
and making the
heart rate rocket.....
in Fat Albert
rising cholesterol levels....
throughout New Zealand
adversely affected shearers....
with crackling cornbread
lashings of pimentos.....
milk of magnesia
and orange marmalade
topped with a
serving of Trix.
Countless comic fans
were gathering to
lose their virginity
with a mechanical
bull but unfortunately
a real woman
happened to open
the mylar bag
and out came
the ghost of
Ren and Stimpy
wearing red longjohns
carefully embroidered with...
rotting whale blubber
depicted in satin....
and lime jello
moulded like a ....
pair of humongous
breasts, that when
pressed between glass
gave passing photographers....
really horrible gas
baked bean overdoses....
from improper ventilation
and underfunded kitchen....
tables made of
shaky scrap balsa...
and potting soil
dug from Wisconsin
containing indian artefacts....
and several Pogs
Atari E.T cartridges.....
colon detox pills
. The chairs were
very precariously stacked...
on Richard Kiel
, who Roger Moore
coated in varnish....
and man butter
fed to sharks....
in the desert
watched by herdsmen.....
who were cannibalistic
through protein deficiency....
yet liked avocados
and raisin splits.....
served in jockstraps
sodden with prune.....
smelling urine and
apricot scented sweat....
that attracted manatees
ambitiously baring flippers....
towards sea urchins
whelk protection rackets.....
were investigated by
intrepid amenome sleuths....
paid by jellyfish
toxic peanut butter,
mutated Micronesian trawlermen.....
drunken dwarf hookers
especially talented in
macrame and painting
monochrome office blocks.....
musty Lincoln logs
and banged up
kids rowing boats....
armed with torpedos
sonar equipped pedalos....
and rottening limes.
European wine lakes....
became polluted when
revelation about antifreeze.....
was published in
Russian submarine manuals.....
in Pig Latin
decyphered by nonobotic....
strippers who liked
heated dancing revelries....
hosted on lard
filled padddling pools.....
while spectators shouted...
for pork crackling....
while sitting on
stone cold bleechers.....
supported by Weebles
compromised by heavy.....
rotting popsicle sticks
rusting beer cans....
and scotch tape
satisfying basic regulations...
of Alexander's Ragtime
female hygiene products
for Ruth Buzzi
floating far above....
the sphere of
reality television shows
based on orienteering....
and also auctioneering
used cardboard boxes
to store pomegranates....
for Mardi Gras
Zombie Massacre, the
cadavers craved vitamen....
c and b
from primary foodstuffs.....
like Smarties and
orange flavoured Revels.....
with bobby socks
muddy football boots....
and cute bowties
pink and blue....
just like the
Numa Numa Dancers
but without rhythm....
That is why
in Norway they
mine glaciers for....
Richard and Judy
now largely unwatched....
television programme on
obscure, tedious media.....
that for some
provided perverse edification....
for comatose housewives
in conditioned domiciles.....
teeming with rude
motorized tumble dryers....
befouled bed pans
heartily disenchanted mice.....
with severe rickets
and bowel obstructions
requiring urgent attention.....
for Ponzi Schemes
from socially disenfranchised
sugar beet farming
hyperbole spouting drummers
upstaging musically challenged....
people's superfluous appendages
for argicultural purposes....
planted in stinking
mounds of oatmeal
mixed with suet
and chicharones with
rabid mutant weasels
and purple gladiolas
grown in hydroponics
twenty miles above.....
the floating city
of Neo-Glasgow.....
Next To McDonald's
atop hydraulic hoists....
and under daffodils.
Pollen floated ceaselessly.....
throughout allergy clinics
prompting emergency procedures....
on homeless cats
attempting to alleviate....
stinky poopy smell
of Lynn Redgrave
former Georgy girl....
from the museum
of prehistoric swinging....
drunken wedding crashers
, which featured three
tons of relish
made from tiny
jellyfish like organisms.....
found in outhouses
of New England
Patriots fans' relatives....
and meant to
give their quarterback.....
a nasty case
of girlscout cookies
that turn green
on first bite....
from killer sheep
infected by scrapie....
and giant tapeworms
wearing tiny spats
and tinier monocles
stained with blood
from a stone
that was eaten
then excreted through
elephantine digestive systems.....
forming a potion
in the doldrums....
of R'lyeh City
making alleys impassable.....
due to marionettes
falling from strings....
while cthulhu danced
under friendly stars....
with Jennifer Grey
all summer long....
in the Catskills
with Patrick Swayze
disregarding temporal protocol....
and inviting ridicule
towards his large
highly anachronistic mullet....
made of Twizzlers
drenched in custard....
mixed with epoxy
setting like concrete...
under the sheltering
of hot fudge
which was really
made from carob
flavoured with raspberry.....
fluoride mouth rinse
improving dental practice....
at Dairy Queen
with mocha lattes
and bad glasses
of red wine
accompanying mouldy cheese....
in tiny thimbles
of banana milkshake.....
with minced garlic
and finely chopped
fresh lambs livers......
pickled in brine
for extra "brineyness."
John Schuck reputedly
showed his nipples
while playing Herman
and other games
enjoyed by mathematicians
beguiled by geometric....
astronomical shapes from
exotic, crystalline structures.....
under propane tanks
because faulty valves
caused significant leakage
dismaying fire officials....
who had to
quicky redeploy from
the chief's wife's
free mustache rides
and swiftly move
towards the canyon
touching light speed.....
and blowing chunks
as velocity accelerates.....
to an almost
achieved failed expectation
of dimensional transcendence.........
resulting in severe...
monday afternoon sensations....
relieving strenuous tension
largely developed overnight....
due to continuous...
overapplication of traditional...
petroleum jelly preparations
in accordance with...
current medical guidelines.....
approved by the
Head of The...
Hasty Pudding Society
after painstaking experimentation....
on live squirrels...
fed nothing but
roasted, salted walnuts....
and stale beer
in novelty glasses
featuring Ninja Turtles.....
and fornicating Smurfs
prompting concerned parents....
to quickly ensure...
that the product
became readily available....
particularly to those...
living in cars
in clifftop sites....
eating only Styrofoam
like popcorn substitute....
but without butter
tasted somewhat bland....
used toilet paper
at least provided....
a biodegradable alternative....
to plastic utensils.....
and smelled interesting
musty yet fragrant....
just like my
sweaty gym socks
only less putrid
than stale haddock....
and fried liver
with rancid gravy
that was served
with ice cream
at Burger King
topped with lettuce...
and extra anchovies
garnished with sultanas....
and pineapple bits.
Hold the chutney
flavours naturally develop....
when finally coagulated
deterred further comsumption....
of brime shrimp
even with pineapple....
and extra capers
seasoned with Baconnaise
and cherry pieces....
laced with nanotech
scales robotic barnacles....
pried off rogue
strippers with large
melons that grow
three inches daily
when properly watered :smile:
and sprinkled with
fresh olive oil....
and juju bees
produced accompanying honey...
and heavy weight
flageons of mead....
teeming with tadpoles
mingling with sticklebacks....
covered in lampreys
feeding ravenous pikes.....
sour flavored Skittles
as improvised bait.....
on platinum hooks
during perch season....
in stormy weather
drifting perilously close...
to Oprah Winfrey
who was floating
like Baron Harkonnen
in the toilet
surrounded by vicious
poo crazed waterboatmen.......
smeared with lard
to fry gently....
until golden brown
serve on lettuce...
with crispy bacon
and hollandaise sauce
smothered in gravy
and fried again
in badger phlegm
and whale blubber
coated in breadcrumbs...
and fish guts
splashed soy sauce...
crumbled cheese doodles
with cardboard boxes
adding SOME flavour.....
to celebrity chef
Sandra Lee's recipes.
Meanwhile, in Idaho
the aliens have
deployed telekinetic groundhogs....
because of their
underground infiltration capabilities....
to convert Nuns..
to environmentally friendly...
feminine hygiene products
combating ongoing neglect...
of those hard
fighting armoured reptillian...
cable TV installers
illegally hooking upto....
the Matrix, where
programmers became batteries...
in giant vibrators
running SKYNET software...
for Bill Gates
whose head exploded
gushing apricot jam
on toasted teacakes....
with moldy sardines
attracting feral sealions........................................
and trained walruses
to auditions for...
"America's Next Porn
decrying Sea Mammal"...
coming to Fox
starting April Fools....
Day and running
sores are featured
following mountain marathons....
with feral cats
acting as guides....
for rich tourists
traversing tortuous glacier....
in the nude
Eating tea sandwiches
skipping through bracing....
cold blood spurting
rabid sea monkeys
with large, pointy
candidly drawn swords....
filled with candy
expiry date: 1987.....
that melted in
excessive indoor temperatures....
caused by rubbing
floor tiles together....
while breaking wind
in a hurricane
force, highly public.....
performance art exhibit
lauded by onlookers...
, especially those who
had something urgent...
in their pants
requiring discreet disposal.....
behind hedgerows where
cats smoke crack
and have sex
with wanton lynxs....
in green Jello
and pinto beans
a la mode
but rapidly becoming....
just a mess
requiring urgent disposal....
under a big
furry and smelly
(http://content.ytmnd.com/content/6/9/2/692a957aeb4022c54b1895c1d5291afd.gif)
Bigfoot apeing hippy.....
wearing wader boots
full of vaseline
causing inconvenient slippages....
into monkey feces
regurgitated banana fibres....
and sausage meat
served in pastries....
with kumquat chutney
an optional extra....
goat liver pate'
garnished with lettuce....
harvested from fields
near the UFO
anal probe factory
and gift shop
selling exploratory drills....
for nasal mining
flu-ridden pachyderms....
the principal export
of remote coastal...
Shatner fan clubs
forgoing normal expediences....
regarding clean laundry
valiantly venturing unclad....
through church picnics
inspiring euphoric curiosity...
among old ladies
eager to confirm....
texture and taste
of mouldy pastry...
filled with mucilage
largely industrially derived....
from naughty bits
of dehydrated manatees....
soaked in brandy
dipped in chocolate....
and bread mold
which brings us
so much joy
watching foreign films
in which mimes
scream in agony
ruining their acts
of tofu filled
invisible boxes. The
Mistress of the
liberate caged monkeys...
from Dimension X
endangering human colonization...
of Brad Pitt's
available left armpit....
by adopted children
of biomechanical extraterrestrials...
were opposed by
Columbian drug runners
armed with waffles
exuding noxious gases...
which smelled like
chemically treated effluence...
and Old Spice
in raw sewage
from Indian restaurants
jalfreezi-coated chunks.....
of white fish
sizzled away nicely...
in another dimension,
eager beavers deciphered...
David Lynch movies
with ancient runes
conspicuously marked in.....
purple felt pen
Marked "Made in....
the People's Socialist
Democratic Revisionist Isolationist
Anarchist Antidieestablishmentarianist Republic....
of North Eastern
Indo-European linguistic...
Meanwhile, this thread...
began to cause
a rift in
space, time and
Trevor's underpants while
ironing out creases....
while trying to
Establish varying degrees....
of control over
Doggett's Elvira obsession.
nice one, Rev
said Doggett who
everyone thought was
Handsome and great
but a bit
annoying at times
and really freaking
cool at times
Rev. Powell decided
to go down
[insert dirty joke]
but at the
same time Darksider
was fighting off
the advances of
RuPaul, Boy George,
and Rue McClanahan
but he didn't
really want to
. Secretly he enjoys
Jello Pudding Pops
and romantic comedies
even Gary Busey
took off his
pants while praising
the likes of
surfing nudist bikers
in the movie
theater while roasting
his butt cheeks
making Paquita say....
they look like
giant pancakes with
strawberries and whipped
cottage cheese and
lots of bacon
. Oprah proceeded to
shoot rockets at
Andrew Dice Clay
who shouted, "Ow!
"You no good..."
then he pulled
out his little
bowl of macaroni
which he had
secretly stashed under
his butt cheeks
which now stunk
of ass and
moldy goat cheese
. Meanwhile at the
barbershop, heroin was
hidden in Billy
Goats making police
nervous about approaching
the doughnut shop
. Still they decided
no one likes
expensive coffee so
they ran naked
to the petrol
to have a(n)
steaming bowl of
clam chowder mixed
with almond roca
which gave them
persistent gastric-related...
acid reflux, causing
frantic searching among...
cannibal Pygmies of
of Appleton, Wisconsin
Meanwhile, back at
nudist colony, Circus
was heard saying,
"Does this look...
like it could
be used with
Preparation H and
a clone made
of Styrofoam because
I really need
big Eighties hair
to mate with
a scary clown
whose name was
Poogie, the infamous
dancing wierdo." However...
when Poogie discovered
Dennis had been
down in the
sewers, the Teenage
fans of Twilight
hatch a plot
involving romance and
awful fan fiction
describing an alternative
universe where Vegans
and meat lovers
argue over what
pizza topping they
wouldn't like stuck
on a pizza.
Meanwhile in New
-castle, geordies were
Illicitly brewing brown.....
ale for their
Sunderland supporting relatives....
cheering the Premiership
Standard cheeerleding squad
as they sang
I don't wanna
continue as designated...
dramatic plot device
for soap opera...
stars who can't
tell what the
viewing housewives are
are really doing
in the nude
and why their
boiling carrot soup
tastes similar to
rancid canned ravioli.
"P*ss off..." exclaimed...
a drunk Superman
who was molesting
Lois Lane while
Jimmy Olsen masturbated
to pictures of
Bruce Wayne in
a pair of
Incredible SPiderman illustrated....
pamphlets advertising superhero
contraceptives with free
cock rings and
a super vibrating
giant black dildo
. Which was a
a digital video
of Green Lantern
masturbating to a
bisexual love scene
of Wonder Woman
and She Hulk
featuring cameos by
Harley Quinn, Storm,
George Kennedy and
Tom Cruise as
Captain Kirk with
additional appearances by
Slobodan Milosevic's zombie,
feathered pitbull intimidating...
all who dared
to pluck a
valuable Golden Eagle's....
eyelashes making them
slightly less effective....
on genital warts
making bedtime unusually...
uncomfortable because of
faulty hot water....
underneath the headboard
affecting average temperatures...
in thong underwear
around coastal regions....
of Antarctica making
Penguins rapidly mutate.....
into something resembling
Domesticated aquatic reptiles....
that spit out
fruit-flavoured jello....
, Diet Pepsi and
compensatory fresh fruit....
peeled by Jerry
Springer ethusiasts unwillingly...
under the watchful
Cybernetically enhanced binoculars....
of an androgynous
dayglo feathered seagull....
who's mating call
went unheeded by
Wang Chung fans
and telephone sanitizers
because they weren't
up to standards
Rigorously approved during...
halftime Superbowl shows
starring Wayne Newton
tapdancing with ocelots...
by the light
of high energy....
tunneling neutrino beams
sent by killer
Star Trek fans
desperate for sexual
unison with interstellar....
hot cross buns
baked in lard,
smeared with peanut....
oil and melted
beef kidney fat
irritating disgruntled vegans....
but who cares?
Endangered sentient carrots....
revolted against vegetable
overlords who fried
broccoli dipped in
melted jelly beans
which were not
European Union regulated....
Fantastic Four Reboot
Featuring motion-captured....
Ewoks from the
butt of Lucas
Haas' amish persona....
and a partridge
retrained to operate...
illegal gummi bears
who humped everything
loosely pertaining to.....
colorful plumage on
old ladies' hats
also intricately embroidered....
with "I Love..."
Nights of wild.....
Turkey and eating
Egg fried rice....
laced with LSD
by Cantonese Yippies....
who kill for
Isolated Yongari cells....
and clam chowder.
Unprecedented seismological phenomena....
caused by flatulence
of swamp monkeys
who pilfered low...
grade hash oil
from the general....
store of Hooterville.
Sally Jessie Raphael
exclaimed, "Don't fondle..."
the cool whip!"
But the ghost
of Trevor's underpants
Haunted "Simpsons" fans....
until they vomited
big gobs of
Twinkies making onlookers
shout, "Encore! Encore!"
while local prostitutes
Maximize their profits
in livestock fetishes
featuring Disney cartoons
Frolicking in pastures...
full of tiny
genetically altered emus.....
while death stalks
Puppets of darkness....
and general malaise
jars of mayonnaise
glowing praise and
lots of bloody
Reserved parking bays....
filled with macaroni
and sauce hollandaise
Not spaghetti bolognase....
with hot dogs.
Charles Nelson Reilly
was a bad
judge of metaphysical
concepts manifesting themselves...
into gobs of
Cartesian inspired amoebic...
pink bath soap
contaminated rustic breakwaters.....
but then again
it was delicious
with whip cream
and onion dip
on toast points.
Tinned corned beef....
soaked in Pennzoil
Deftly deep fried...
also had a
Decidedly medicinal dosage.....
for treatment of...
Irritating nasal blockages.....
which were plaguing
Prominent controversial sportsmen...
having heavy periods
Of protracted experimentation....
with alternative herbal
cigarettes smoked by
kindergardeners wearing turquoise
diving helmets that
play calypso music
Entrancing vivacious dolphins....
preforming sexual favors
despite utter preoccupation...
with the NASDAQ
Rising and falling....
due to flatulent
Navy bean stocks.....
but Pepto Bismol
improved bear markets....
causing demands for
sticky backed plastic....
on panty liners
frustrating college freshmen...
who resorted to
investigating sorority house....
kitchens for recipes
containing mint sauce....
for a homemade
mango chutney based...
barbecue sause and
chopped kitty liver
Wrapped in breadcrumbs....
and topped with
banana flavoured custard....
sprinkled with nuts.
The Blind Viking
Traded Pictish artefacts....
to butt monkeys
Hawking antiquarian anomalies....
in a superfluous
extensively bubble wrapped...
hot dog carts
Never usually sufficed....
Albanian mice droppings
were furtively smuggled ....
by mariachi bands
playing Funky Town
with a flute
using only their
slide trombones and
arthritic hands dipped
Into unsuspecting pockets...
of head cheese
which made them
want to boogie
to emphatic outpourings....
of gooey pus
from fake bodies
of Chupacabra offspring
meanwhile back at
potato chip factory
somebody was being
Torrentially seasoned with...
the mystery flavor
of the day
Rancid Ramman Noodles
Congealed in drains....
of public restrooms
after the Brazilian
swim team bit
Metallic pirahna fins....
that caused cuts
In unseemly locations....
on drunken baboons
causing genetic alterations....
in opium poppies
Rendering cautious observers....
bewildered by the
rapidly sprouting tendrils....
of mutated potatoes
especially because they
Met Irish requirements...
For they are
Outstandingly good for....
breathing new life
Into tundra dwelling....
baboons with hemorrhoids
that spit toxic
Highly corrosive compounds...
That can be
mixed with lemonaid
and bombs are
full of cholesterol
that can be
extracted and modified
to test margarine....
for it is
An invaluable superlubricant.....
that is addictive to hamsters..
and certain small
Togolese police officers
and whores do
Unspeakably agile interpretations....
that can get
Bavarians jailed. To
kill and accept
without showing emotion, we are considered by many to be..
dead and alive
or so it seems. On Tuesdays we like to..
Test electrical products.....
that can save
Dangerously depleted ozone....
that will be
Conducive to mutagenic....
and weapons eat
rival incoming projectiles...
which can be
fatal to goats.
who is the
insane bestiality-minded goat herder that..
keeps posting more
Nazi livestock porn..
in the wrong
Dairy Farmer's Union.....
which in time
Enrolled disenfranchised Fresians....
who then will
Refuse to subsidize....
nuclear waste infection
Of elephants graveyards....
that taste like
Cured, boiled, processed....
spicy buffalo dick
which is popular
with dead cows
But we digress. When Saturday rolls around..
English soccer fans....
kill thousands of
grasshoppers causing shifts
In public opinion...
against Manchester United
Allowing Chelsea to...
elope with Richard
Breaking traditional protocol....
and eat with
Their bare fingers...
covered in hot
Calorie-loaded caramel....
rattle snake venom
inducing heart stopping...
butt naked babes
To feel chills....
of hairy pits
Stranded without razors.....
or guy penis's
Needing imminent relief....
from explosive diarrhea..
Seeking convenient conveniences....
for popping pimples
Then dabbing them...
with Tabasco sauce
and table salt
To repel snails....
and other mollusks
Endangering herbacious borders....
that have sex
with giant clams
who eat Russian's
Exportable raw materials....
like Domino's Pizza
With stuffed crusts....
are being mined at..
Undisclosed Arctic locations....
by retarded, inbred kittens..
who use only
Cybernetically-enhanced mittens....
to mix tobacco
With genetically-modified.....
Onion flavored sperm
Assisting population growth....
in developing countries
whose people fry
Surplus Water Buffalos....
dicks and ducks
..until they explode in an array of colors.
People kill a***oles
..both the people and the orifices..
for not following
Basic, expected mores.....
such as scrubbing
Turtle backs and
Carefully polishing freshly....
squeezed turds..
which smell like
mouldy prune danish
covered with stinkbugs.
and disgusting roaches
should never begin
to romance bedbugs
under suspension bridges
made out of
boot shoelaces and snot..
Spanning many miles....
over Rosie O'Donnell's
Solar eclipse inducing.....
male sex organs
which were loaded
with metallic metal
and McDonalds styrofoam burger containers..
eat hairy Pu$$Y
Covertly provided via....
amorous piranhas with gaudy overbites..
of the weirdest
proportioned incisors orthodontists......
have and love
Sampling virgin plasma.....
sperm that will
Influence genetic developments....
for the grossest
Jerry Orbach impersonators
over a period
of her cycle
While her husband....
drank tree sap
noted for enhancing....
crazy monkey armpits
in European populations....
where drug rings
Attempted to recruit....
Sage Stallone and
Dolph Lundgren's cousins.....
however, they weren't home. So instead..
they used more words
when allowed three
clowns to have sex with
Acrobats who crave...
chili and the
Levitation provided by...
the explosive flatulence
from the tunnel
of a giant rat's digestive tract.
MILFS were baffled
..and also jealous that they didn't get to..
Just to interrupt for second. The rule here is three words per post. Much more fun that way.
go to the
furry hat convention
thanks to AndyC
who was flirting
with Rev. Powell,
who immediately rebuffed
Jack's amorous advances
until kinky Circus
An acrobatic raconteur....
masturbated in his
Hermetically sealed coccoon....
of total weirdness
I never saw the first page.. I didn't know there were only 3 words per entry. Sorry.
..showering his essence..
on a salad
bowl and his
Mayonnaise drenched consciousness...
of total crumbs
from splintered cookies....
my daddy gave
to my sister
for her first
monster truck rally
became extremely important
When meticulously lubricating....
swollen cow teats
Thus increasing yields....
in tripe sales
of the newest
genetically engineered varieties
of transvestite hookers
WHO EAT THE
Souls of clients.....
that subscribe to
Applied chaos theory....
by the clowns
in insane asylums
Rejecting electro-magnetic....
candy apple sticks
Thus subsidizing roundabouts.....
donuts and the
Illegal trade in....
The batter that
contains mashed testicles..
inside lacy bras
rolled in breadcrumbs
Smothered in ketcup....
which are usually
Avoided by Buddhist...
nuns with pacemakers
Attempting an accredited.....
their own peaceful
Intentions required tidal.....
waves of urine
Being carefully diverted....
into water supplies..
Earmarked for emergency....
high colonic irrigation
In health spas....
and muffler shops
Necessitating a discount....
on jellied eels
Devoured by Cockney....
brain aliens who
Lauded Pearly queens....
dressed in garish
Multitoned metallic gowns....
and smeared feces..
on Leonard Cohen
and his warm
chicken caesar salad
Reciting peans concerning.....
mildew on grout
Around valuable mosaics....
telling stories about
Classical architectural follies....
of Upper Mesopotamia
Concealing John Agar's.....
huge erect penis
From marauding apaches....
and Richard Simmons
Sharpening war arrows....
nipples and his
Unique physical extremities....
on how he
Climbed seemingly unscaleable....
brains from planet
Lambda Lambda Lambda
Entering another phase....
four and this
Intelligently disrupted picnic....
massacre from the
Salmonella infested remnants....
of Toucan Sam
lurking between slices....
of anchovy pizza
Wrongly delivered to....
JJ80's fan club
By Ninja turtles....
who excelled in
Locating "Gorgo" avatars....
which turned on
Naval manoeuvre schedules....
into a huge
List of potential...
suspects who did
Little to prevent....
the War on
Unlicenced hotlinking to....
the Queen of
Soul's personal hotline.....
dot com forwardslash
Stairwaytoeternity.....
forwardslash Bob_Saget
frequenting edenic environs....
backslash Whatthef**k dot
com. Links farms....
and sexy toys
Turned innocent heads.....
into psychotic eyeballs
..when they witnessed..
the magical power
of Circus's superior
Horizontal thrusting technique.
which disappointed me
and my growth
but at least..
Provided party gimmicks....
like grandma's jiggle
to the masses.
Now we have
a healthy business
Hawking balloon animals....
to rodeo clowns
Gatecrashing Coronation Street....
for cheap publicity
For Libertarian socialist....
Rodeo Night at
Rev Powell's house
Guaranteeing legal representation...
and satisfied ladies.
On relaxing afternoons.....
JJ80 would drink
Circus's toliet water
Refreshing his sense......
of bad taste
in Hummel figurines
Of Irish dinosaurs.....
in Bavarian restaurants
run by fat
Scandinavian operatic divas....
who sang with
Death metal combos...
in a capella performances
With 'singing' whales....
who weren't circumcised
Until accidentally encountering....
Stephen Segal's fungus
Encrusted pizza debris....
that gave them
super marfan syndrome
of the worst
farts made by
corpses of hamsters
that have eaten
just the grits
Leaving revolting morsels....
of zombified remains
that have risen
Sharp and early....
to get the
hell out of
Ronald McDonald's anus
burgers and those
damned shamrock shakes
taste like stale
forced froggy farts
from outer space
by way of
A space probe....
up the bum
and down the
epiglottis making noises
like a gagging
Adult male rhinocerous...
after having eaten
Dried savannah grass...
from the forbidden
Elephants Graveyard zone...
with Scatman Crothers
Compering ivory auctions....
for charities involving
Great white hunters....
..that dance naked..
with Jimmy Smits
Whilst Steve Boccho....
massaged the buttocks
of an ape
Society advanced beyond....
garden variety bestiality
yet still pursuing...
forbidden simian pleasures
in Montana oddly
and rather loudly
for elderly audiences..
to get and
Nostalgically cherish despite....
that robbers are
Using their absences....
to have sex....
Constantly and voraciously...
with the wives......
of retired postmen
Hoping Kevin Costner...
would stop making
Curious, high-pitched....
farts that can...
Detonate Cat brains...
out from their
Sonically lacerated skulls...
and out of
Reach of buzzards...
whose blood pollutes....
Climate controlled ecosystems...
are maintained by
contaminated sewer workers..
with lesions on
Fingers and palms...
and their genitalia..
which shocked all
of the nuns
Who furtively gathered....
in Avery Schreiber's
Meticulously well-organized....
owl pellet room
Where vengeful voles...
confused by the
Persistent exploratory drilling....
danced the Macarena
With Al Gore....
beating Limbaugh with
Ann Coulter's candy....
cards dipped in...
Official Western brand....
pig sauce with...
Pickled trotters floating...
in ones own
juices. Somehow, falcons
made paper cranes
can breathe toxic
spores of happiness
made by crazy
pyrotechnically skilled marmosets..
who eat toxic
toe jam nuggets
and bird phosphates
skunk spray from
An amorous French....
crepe super hero
named Jacques Beavuer
Robot. His only
function was to
Allow Jean Reno.....
to dismantle the
Iquana's Rubik cube.....
within the time
Richard O'Brien allotted....
that crystals should
Only be placed....
on the altar
After shotgun weddings....
where Circus was...
Bowling for Britain......
because otherwise they
Gave rival wicketkeepers....
bl*w jobs with
industrial strength vacuums
to suck out
Reality television pretensions....
between the ugliest
Fairytale princesses created...
by retarded bovines
which a circus
Abandoned in Romania....
burned down a
Somewhat dilapidated vineyard...
in an attempt
to eat p***y
Cats found festering.....
on fresh muscle
On butchers counters....
in third rate
knifes that are
Rejected by backwoodsmen...
that masturbated into
public restroom sinks..
for George Michael
To utilise covertly....
in ways we
couldn't have imagined
but had to
Sufficiently restrain himself....
from all manner
Of impulsive reactions...
to masturbate over...
Strangely hirsute Russian....
Naked mole rats..
Escaping genetic manipulation....
by eating mutated...
enriched vas deferens..
Thus absorbing patterns....
of neural connections
On experimental circuitboards....
that Microsoft has.....
Securely secreted within....
cereal and milk
Consumed by Japanese....
who say F-bombs
To postal workers...
that do acid....
Despite Sergeant Slaughter...
pounds a spectator...
Whom the Undertaker....
bleated the color...
In pastures beyond...
infinity. But here's
A meteorically rising.....
bull and dragon
Straddling Jupiter's moons.....
with spell checkers!
Proper syntax structures....
permit allowance of..
a king to...
rule over turds..
Reporting coding errors...
from Dany Devito
Received from past....
wedgies and peed
Manfully into a ....
fistful of money...
and poured into..
Obama's carnivorous rectum
But scooped out.....
a ripe peach
Which was immediately....
fermented into a
murky brown beverage
called beer. Now....
is the winter
Olympics cool for
Intense thespian discontent.....
and hot lesbian
naked pudding wrestling..
sponsored by Christian
dairy goat farmers
Armed with shotguns....
to fend off
Dangerously dehydrated oxen...
with chainsaws and...
Little sachets of....
Bob-omb's and shurikens
Targeted directly against.....
Scatman Crothers and
the Blues Brothers
who stole
The plans for.....
a steam powered
Light rapid transit....
plane and emits
brussel sprout farts..
Thus enabling speeds......
made from rocket...
Nosecones collected for....
experimental viagra for...
Men who drive....
nails into their
Feet in ritual....
shallot harvest celebrations
Whilst potato wine....
taste like barf...
and coagulated pus
is drizzled onto..
old men's buttocks
that are covered...
In powdered milk....
drank by Puke-faced....
drunken Mennonite grandmothers
who has chainsaws...
Eternally causing deforestation......
of mystical pubic
Himalayal Yeti fur....
Many had fallen
During the hunt....
for Red October...
When hardened submariners...
braided one's hair
As a mascot....
and sallied forth
Into uncharted seas....
of sand dunes...
Known in folklore.....
for their predilection..
of killing these...
little green bugs
that feast on..
big stinky feet ...
and smelly undies :buggedout:
in damp basements
Inspiring David Cronenberg.....
to pass gas
Endangering western civilization....
made from crap...
Discerningly selected for....
hamburgers from Burger....
Vans owned by....
George W. Bush...
Who told Obama....
"Can I suck.....
Internal Revenue Service ...
...to please myself?"
Only if you.....
give me a....
Very welll lubricated.....
piece of machinery
Which could replicate.....
a turkey call
in a subway station ...
Causing queue jumpers...
to eat crap....
Deposited by horses....
from California's own...
New Age movement....
called peace for....
dysentery infected hamsters..
Suffering discrimination from...
their own race...
In segregated hedgerows....
of bowel movements...
mixed with pudding
and fermented urine..
squeezed from marmots
Who imbibe countlesss....
whores that will...
Do ALMOST anything.....
for sex and....
cookies," Obama replied.
But unfortunately for
Osama bin Ladin.....
his favourite goat
ate 20 grenades ...
two nuclear bombs....
The firing codes,......
and his wallet.
International secret agents....
pooped on their...
Polished bathroom floors....
because they ate
two scoops of
Rotting fisherman's bait.....
and a dozen
Prize winning perch.....
which they promptly
Threw back into...
George Bush's anus..
which promptly exploded
cows' s**t. Here's
a fine example
Of Classical styling.....
and hip new
cars with diamond....
studded hub caps ...
broke a man's....
rectum when Ricardo
Montalban and a
midget pro wrestler ...
Resoundingly suplexed a ......................
hippo off its....
Gloriously mud splattered....
rock and killed.....
Several rare crocodiles.....
that are cannibals...
Devouring fancy handbags....
made from pork-rinds...
Deviously masquerading as.....
Spice Girl fans
suck ****s and....
Backstreet Boys obsessives.....
while Richard Dawson
Asked a Quarterback.....
to go bowling
With Woody Harrelson.....
in order to...
Publicize medicinal aspects....
from the several...
Over the counter....
who has dark...
Sinister intentions towards....
several retarded schoolchildren..
who pick their....
Curriculum surprisingly carefully.....
from column A ...
while lunch ladys
excrete endless streams..
of rat urine
To soften gravy....
flavored vegetarian toenails
for Ron Jeremy
who made some..
Nitroic sexay werere (smashing potatoes that....)
wondered aloud what
AndyC was doing
with those cabbages
He'd carefully selected.....
from DarkSider's garden
To make soup....
and cheese tits
on hot toast....
made by Bull....
Earlier this evening..............
with butter and...
Just a suggestion...
but sugar was...
In short supply.....
so he used
Too many saccharines....
and ate his....
Last remaining liquorice....
pie that had...
big, juicy prunes
mixed with Spam
and beef flavored...
kibbles and bits ...
that a snake...
had pooped. Still
the Toyota Supra...
parked in Bull's
Restaurant, had Ackbar...
exclaimed IT'S A
TRAP AND WHAT.....
the hell is
Monica doing in
white after August
covered in mud ...
Then draped in....
matted yak hair
Sprayed and dyed....
Pink and green...
just like Martha
Stewart's pubic hair
Thus not fit...
for my Supra
Incurring penalty points.....
against school lunches
of potted meat
and sour drinks....
served to dignitaties....
in pink parachutes ...
Admiring the scenery....
of Davidsfarm Youtube...
But disabled embedding.....
caused me to...
Consider violently rebooting....
Windows 7. Question:
How much is
a tuxedo pants...
Stain gonna cost.....
me to keep
Dry cleaners satisfied.....
with Polaris shinning...
Coming as standard....
Procedures: don't kill.....
Programs essential for....
instant oatmeal recycling
To benefit strongmen....
, requested the dog
Faithful as ever.....
to worshipers of
The Iron Spider....
of Sodomy Mountain
in Montana. Who...
Very strongly believed....
that nocturnal emissions..
Caused fanged mutations...
in premature children..
who would be
excellent building inspectors
For futuristic pyramids....
decorated with carcasses..
of human bodies....
Selected for harvesting.....
pumpkins and bananas
which housed parasites
Capable of burrowing.....
a deadman's house...
which he would
Demolished a church,....
Borrow for purposes...
Unknown Reasons for....
Eerie creaking noises....
made by JJ80...
Renacting Maxwell's mania.....
For the silver
plate. now here's....
flying, flaming remnants
(my wife will love this one)
Of interdimensional dogfights.....
instigated by telekinetic...
psychopaths who smell....
Rather fragrant despite...
they took a......
Step across martian....
island and into....
Grey granite cliffs....
where lemmings mated
and dinosaurs f**ked....
Entire U-boat crews....
that f**ked Jews.....
Until the Allies...
f**ked Holy Mary
before enraged Catholics
Gained the initiative...
and took their
potty mouths away
before being spanked
Black and blue....
Oysters and Clams....
Yielded no benefits....
from The Darksider's....
Rather good choice....
of plastic accoutrements..
Manufactured in Taiwan....
II, a subterranean
Plastic moulding empire....
by surreptitious rodents..
fearing reprisals by
Well-manicured samurai....
wearing silk kimonos ...
decorated with obscene . . .
scat porn pictures..
with green penile
Secretions contaminating large....
pustulent boils. On
alternating Sundays neighbourly....
orcs and elves
Concerning squatting rights....
of dwarves and
Hobbits who dislike.....
elves and ents
Attracted to lightly...
buttered wheat toast ...
And piping hot....
mutated monkey testicles
Mixed with carrots.....
and bananas to....
Feed discerning novice....
to drive reverse...
Down back alleyways....
until they arrived ...
at the proper
appreciably decent hour....
for enchanting the
Thrash metal princesses
strung out on..
Rare, caffeine-laced......
scarabs. They then
made a casserole
Consisting of offcut....
mugwump spleens. We
Skipped lunch willingly....
and rode the bus ...
Well away from...
Gary Busy's enraged
Micronesian fan club.....
of complete idiots....
Misplacing outrigger canoes....
for the love...
Of three oranges...
oddly located on
An iceberg drifting....
into JJ80's house
Melting to release....
all the hostages
Imprisoned since Flight.....
was discovered by
Yetis with huskies....
on the equator
drinking frozen margaritas ...
with some old
fat pedophilic nuns..
Reviving questionable habits.....
and punning unmercifully.
Wordplay can only.....
make you insane ...
If targeted towards....
your mama. She
Opened a can...
of kidney beans ...
While rice pudding....
mixed with olives ...
Fell victim to....
mold and penicillin..
berries and cream....
Buns with slightly....
intoxicating breast milk
sprinkled on them..
By adventurous horticulturists....
whose giant purple
Blooms received interest.....
from Satanically possessed..
red headed lumberjacks ...
Indulging conifer deities.....
who demanded sacrifices
Including finest ales.....
from buttcheek acne
Noted for severity....
of liquid propulsion..
On Intercontiental missiles....
sold by Iranian
Beer company that
Provided inferior refreshment....
that is really
Poor value considering....
that nuclear-waste is.....
Carelessly seeping into...
Duff Beer berry....
Before bottling commences....
..and mutating employees..
into growing extra
Fingers with webbing....
called Richard Cockburn
Didn't barbecue chickens....
because he's a...
Very strict vegan...
who drinks plastic
lawn flamingo tea
Whilst aimlessly perambulating.....
..and furiously masturbating..
and incomprehensibly ovulating
while looking at...
naked pictures of
Donkey Kong's own.....
Indentured banana peelers......
that feast upon....
Crates of pineapples.....
made from JJ80's....
discarded undies, which
doesn't compares to...
Southern African specimens.....
from Trevor's garden
Whose unique ecosystym....
invites poopy things..
To fruitfully multiply....
Donkey Kong's mating...
dance is disturbing
Especially when blonde....
velociraptors congregate for..
sweet Richard Simmon's
huge hairy musky
buddy, AndyC. The
song, Generator, has....
turned to overdrive
and Princess Daisey....
gave her knickers
to Prince Charming....
and he kissed
her chocolate starfish..
right on the
top of his
Pointy wizard's hat.....
that was covered
In khaki camouflage...
and pink paisley
Patterned silk ribbons....
which he wore
in his dress
but his hands
were covered in
Choice English mustard...
he borrowed from
A teenage caveman.....
who killed a ...
a living Barbie
After rediscovering fire.....
in my tights
of unforgiving justice
Personified as righteous.....
drug dealing priests
By Martian missionaries.....
filing their taxes
like surly crackbabies
Who gripe consistently....
about the price
Of camelhair coats.....
worn only for
Carling Cup replays....
vs Stoke City
Despite Graham Poll.......
a drama queen
Adding seven minutes....
to doomsday countdown
before impending collapse
Of hedge funds....
and ladder bonds
from too much
Insider trading by.....
Nick Leeson and
Former BCCI employees....
that ate several
Files of evidence.....
of Blood. Can.....
Anyone define exactly.....
when this happened?
Using Euclidean geometry.....
by a synesthete
Assigning a colour.....
to a number
Divisible by three....
but not 8,
And still mathematically.....
correct. Our universe
could not comprehend
Fleeting interruptions by.....
Hitler impersonators who
eat rotten eggs..
and really spicy
cat hair balls..
for no better
Demagoguery to aggrieved....
zombie smurfs from
Deepest, darkest Belgium....
where they all ...
drank beer and
Looked for proof.....
of the existence
Of verifiable remedies.....
painful ingrown toenails ...
which I removed
Allowing the Ringmaster....
summon the Super
Gonad crushing press..
that was used
like an iron
Lung to assist....
killing cinema goers
Trying to resist.....
engaging their minds
in mindless pursuit ...
of bad movies
Particularly those directed.....
by Andy Milligan..
and make sweet
Edible blueberry underwear
that melts quickly ...
in the heat
Generated by decaying.....
monkey butt mushrooms
Diced and fried....
in olive oil ...
and then deep fried in the blood of squirrels for that extra tangy taste...
DWV,
Each entry is only supposed to be 3 words. I got nicked on it too, so no worries.
So we'll take your first three words...
Quote from: diamondwaspvenom on April 10, 2010, 06:20:31 PM
and then deep ...
And I'll add these three:
...fried in the...
Bowels of my
deep, dark, dank
But highly stimulated.....
internal combustion engine ...
Requiring elbow grease.....
and blue cheese...
To inspire dreams....
of nymphomaniacal nuns..
Forming bad habits....
involving anal induced..
Highly intriguing sensations....
wild beyond imagination ...
but deadly. Meanwhile,
a girl with
An antic disposition....
of pig's poo....
Earmarked as fertiliser....
stopped at Walmart ...
to apply for
Emergency supplies of......
large sanitary napkins..
Scientifically manufactured for.....
cleaning up s**t
Deposited by geriatric.....
monsters of antiquity.
Cryogenically frozen troglodytes.....
were thawed when
a secret government
Health and safety.....
program went awry.
This resulted in a mutant strain of Trevor's undies
Occupying Table Mountain....
and eating nearby..
A woman's hairy ...
friend who didn't
shave for several...
Sponsored charity projects,,,,
that said "have.....
Some Respect for....
The Creeping Terror...
from my basement ...
ya jerks!" and....
Did not investigate.....
litter boxes in
their neighbor's trees..
Which inevitably attracted....
flying flaming remnants
Of nesting pairs.....
of large anacondas ...
who began recycling
"Wombles" books obtained.....
from geriatric wallabies..
with speech impediments ...
Trying to question....
the necessity of the "wonder bra" . . .
the breasts of
Modestly domesticated local....
nurses who like
fondling rabbit genitalia..
In full view...
of pig farmers..
and wonder why
Swill lay uneaten....
when there are..
starving people who ...
Would willingly consider.....
trading their underpants
For international recognition....
...seen on the...
cable channel CNN..
Attracting Hollywood's endless......
. . . procession of actors with no talent . . .
Seeking positive publicity....
instead of burritos ...
With carefully formulated....
three word phrases
Quote from: Rev. Powell on April 24, 2010, 10:15:28 PM
three word phrases
Slamming Burgo there, Rev? :teddyr:
..and handfuls of..
Pithy, urbane but....
edible bits of
Former lounge singers.....
. . . wearing fishnet stockings . . .
Intended for satisfying....
Rev's desire for
Daily cinematic invigoration....
from underground videos
Directed by ambitious.....
Germans who like...
Experimental apple strudels.....
. . . smeared on their . . .
Sunday best lederhosen.....
..they washed in..
Industrial strength schnapps.....
..then rolled in..
flying, flaming remnants
of pajamas thrown
off a building ...
In a city....
..where people like..
to blame the
genetically mutated rats..
that raped turtles ...
Lacking martial artistry....
to defend themselves
Whilst foraging for...
homeless people's feces..
that the rats
constructed shanty towns
Near city centres.....
from said feces..
and flying flecks
of leper flesh..
As yet unanointed....
by any EVOO
Rachel Ray used ....
To conveniently disguise.....
the rancid flavor
BBQ ribs that....
explode when chewed ...
and leave a
Messy trail of....
confused, scrambling maggots..
to feast upon ...
percussionists who played
With thunderous aplomb....
to crowds of..
milkmen who wore,
scuba diving suits ...
while chasing slimy
University of Kentucky
graduate spider crabs..
Siding with capitalistic....
Neo Nazi conquistadors..
who have never
Actually heard of...
the abominable snowman ...
or Cyndi Lauper..
or even the
Misbegotten offspring of....
Geena Davis and
also Warrick Davis....
commonly known as..
The candidate for.......
ugliest Davis alive.
During its birth..
the colossal squid
ate the placenta..
...with fava beans..
and a chianti..
and won an
Honorary academy award.....
for Best Psycho..
Ever assessed by.....
Dr. Hannibal Lector ...
A man renowned....
for selecting controversial
Ivy League specialists....
that devoured several..
Obese frat boys.....
who had extremely
Large stamp collections......
because cannibalism is
fun for all!
Educational colouring books.....
were distributed by..
Labour back benchers.....
who had no
idea that the
Academy of Motion
Sickness sufferers had....
ridden the rollercoaster ...
that flew off..
Travelling too quickly......
throwing flying flaming
remnants of iguana
teeth and testicles..
Sold to gullible.....
Snakes that ate....
rutabagas and tortillas
Instead of jumping....
into Jello filled
canyons to satisfy
Perverse Medicine men....
with freakishly tiny
Islets of Langerhans
on their buttcheeks..
meanwhile back at
the Staples Center..
LeBron James cried
..."WHERE'S THE BEEF?"...
because the spectators..
had no forks ...
to spear weiners..
of the guys
refereeing the game..
...day tailgate party...
to sweet smelling
baby back ribs..
..torn from screaming...
yellow zonkers with
no explanation of
the Bermuda Triangle.
LeBron defended Kobe..
From further disruption....
of putting* the
*this is supposed to rhyme with but, as in golf terms*
Tournament winning balll......
in an inappropriate
hole (an anus)..
causing a three
Pronged attack by....
huge flying monkeys.
The golfball victim..
Gradually slipped into.....
some thing more
comfortable, because he
Had a date....
With a gerbil..
Specially genetically engineered......
for dinner conversation
In trivial topics....
and slathered with..
flying, flaming remnants
Of yesterday's disgusting.....
pig diarrhea samples..
Carelessly discarded by...
fiery salamanders. The
very next morning..
The European challengers.....
met the enemy
While playing basketball.....
which was strange
While in freefall....
..one player shouted..
"Normal rules don't......"
But he was interrupted when ...
he used too
Few helium balloons.....
..on his anus..
when the rules
Stated no intimacy...
With blow-up dolls..
Except if lubrication....
and proper levitation
For exotic experiments....
were liberally applied..
under laboratory conditions.....
of Wesley Willis
Coveting nobel prizes....
into crap that....
laid dormant for
Mel Gibson to
beat his ex-wife..
with a boot...
, leading observers to
the lost suburbs
Of a subterranean....
meals that contain...
Very little nutritional....
boots to the....
Soft, worryingly exposed....
head of the...
Next most popular...
American Idol reject
Who Barry Manilow....
mentored in the
Hardest falsetto techniques.....
as they sang..
Assorted Disney favourites....
s**tty musicals by....
. . . no-talent wannabes . . .
Insidiously planted by......
Walt Disney himself..
With clandestine support....
of cream cheese.....
eating bluegrass musicians
who dance with
scabies infected prostitutes..
From Area 51......
that smells like...
my mom. She
Recently fully translated....
Zimbabwean to English..
Guides to avoiding......
the law. Here's...
an explanation of
earthworms that mate
Only when soil.....
mixes with marshmallows.
The resulting confectionary.....
was sold at
Columbian-owned outlets.....
at discount prices..
After comsumer's groups....
complained about its
Mechanized production line......
of robotic unicorns...
getting randy with
various seasonal fruits
Carefully placed beside.....
sale priced luggage ...
For swift clearance....
in markdown bins..
for thrifty shoppers.
They were shocked
when they smelled..
like dirty socks ...
and cigarette butts...
Carelessly discarded in.....
public urinals during
Furtive after dinner.....
while making cheap...
Ceramic souvenirs for....
three toed sloths ...
in Northern India
To sell to....
the Dick-head called...
The worldwide authority.....
of defective sperm..
Indicted for misleading.....
several impregnated teenagers..
About alien biological.......
reproductive quirks. The
Last remaining samples...
pizza flavored frankfurters ...
Earmarked for export....
to Anchorage Alaska ...
due to the
Unstable atmospheric conditions......
caused by locusts ...
Evolving immunity to....
statutory rape attempts..
By cybernetically-enhanced......
vibrators covered with
feces coated leeches..
Deliberately included for.....
insanely infinite incubators...
To curb hatchings......
from break dancing.
Questionable choreography aside,
where is my....
Reason to swap......
chocolate for vanilla ...
at sewage plants
...with state sponsored...
frozen consumables exchange
To stimulate investment....
in highly inflated...
Weather balloon manufacturers......
who secretly experiment ...
on rubber gloves....
Discovered while searching.....
for the world's...
Largest existing dragonfly.....
enroute to a ...
College football game....
that had no...
Actual paying spectators.....
because the players..
wore grey pajamas...
And slept until.....
the end of
The solar system......
upsetting the dragonfly..
That secretly created.....
a pancake syrup ...
made from tar
Darker than night.....
and colder than
winter in Siberia...
Where freezing gusts.....
froze ever vampire
Contaminated herd animal.....
bizarrely buttered pancakes...
Served for breakfast.....
in a snowstorm.
The entire ecosystem.......
in an aquarium ...
Populated by prehistoric.....
tampon-eating gerbils..
who sprouted wings ...
To escape agricultural.....
development on the
Russian-owned sector.....
on the outskirts...
of Sea World.
No aquarium held....
more giant toads...
Than one Australian.....
aquarium financed by..
Successful pool sharks......
bent on winning
the heavy weight title
from Vitali Klitschko..
Who trained vigorously.....
with Rocky Balboa.
The distinctive soundtrack................
had one-hit wonders..
From garage bands....
playing death metal
on Casio keyboards..
with missing keys.
The day of
the Homecoming Dance ...
someone sneezed on..
David Hasselhoff and...
threw up cheese....
in his mouth..
while kissing Mary....
Elizabeth Mastrantonio's buttocks..
To impress producers.....
of comedy improv...
with her flexible
Gymnastics routine created...
From watching porn..
Produced in China.....
by blind chickens..
and flatulent pigs..
that make whistles.
The dark, twisted...
Chorus of voices.....
that bologna makes.
when it's reanimated
Nobel Prize winners.....
probed the underbelly...
Of Mafia infiltration.....
with salad tongs ...
that pester many..
frog worshipping Dons..
eating fettuccini alfredo.
The local judiciary.....
decided to investigate
Unregulated investment in.....
paranoid pickle eaters...
Who alleged corporate......
bigwigs slept with..
Mermaids from Atlantis....
creating the Cult of Dagon....
Who lured submariners.....
to kill harpies...
Trying to scavenge.....
old silk clothing...
Lost by Chinese....
government officials who....
Sold computer components.......
to Bulgarian pimps
Who smuggled them.....
inside oven mitts
Specially designed for......
handling napalm in
Secret underground bases.....
where pandas mated
Under intense supervision....
of Russian spies...
Hoping to observe.....
their acrobatic rituals..
To teach cosmanauts.....
the unfathomable horrors of the beyond.....
in controlled environments
(Skullbat just an FYI, three words at a time :cheers:)
On Martian plains.....
where Mister Rogers
Sought evidence of....
mutant flying pigs...
First observed in.....
a miniature horses.....
tiny white teeth.
Veterinary experts theorised......
the previous sentence
Was extremely pretentious.....
and screwed you....
Without any restraint......
while JJ80 jumped
Over tall buildings....
made of Legos
Capable of withstanding.....
heat from volcanos ...
and cow flatulence..
which can ignite ...
In spectacular fashion....
the undergarments of
Betty Crocker's daughter
Especially after consuming.....
her famous saltpeter
Enhanced curry powder.....
leaving a distinct.....
Aroma of eastern......
English shanty town....
dwelling cider makers....
who mix arsenic
With apple juice.....
which sold well
in North Korea...
Where professional gymnasts......
rolled in dung..
to repel natural
redhead nymphomaniacs. Suddenly...
the trapeeze artist..
decided to fart...
in the general...
direction of non-stop.....
bowling pins which...
Did not move....
when the iguana ...
Slipped on spilled.....
poo that was....
made out of
used car's engines....
and seasoned with..
bananas! Could the....
situation get weirder?
Only if time......
bandits came and
painted their privates
with glue based....
Products designed to....
repel amorous kitties
and bunnies which...
were romantically handicapped
with huge smoking....
rhinos who lived
in a swamp.
Swarms of mosquitos....
suffering from the...
subliminal message left...
By humanoid lizards....
and bigfoot-ish fish.
A determined Mothman.....
cried, "Mommy!", because..
His troubling vision.....
made him confused..
Over the identity....
of Ronald McDonald..
Who he believed......
looked like Mothmomma..
After several dozen.....
Iron Maiden fans...
Dared to challenged....
grand master B
To remix their....
appletinis. But back
on the farm...
some lunkheaded kangaroo..
Hopped onto electric......
cupcakes tainted by....
Michael Graves' saliva....
Which provided evidence.....
against Mitchel's case...
Against industrial spies....
known as Marios.
Many misguided poets.....
as in McClould,
Whose riding skills...
proved to be...
Obsolete when chasing....
Kit in Montana's.....
Extensive highway network.....
into spider webs...
Enveloping a jewel.....
manicured thumbs of...
Lindsay Lohan and
an ape from..
Ben Affleck's butt..
tried in vain...
To revive a......
wounded ostrich named
Cecil B. Demille..
Amid fake pyramids.....
and giant squids.
Their tentacles ripped....
Experimental submersibles apart....
because inside them..
horribly mutated crabs...
were making a
DELICIOUS POTATO CLOCK
-Jimmybob
to be sold..
at an auction
In central Dublin....
and the squids
Swam in Guinness.....
while farting bubbles..
that changed colors ...
Alerted nervous swimmers......
to tentacled monstrostities...
Capable of devouring....
the souls of
Blissfully unsuspecting innocents......
who were killing...
Polite representatives of........
Nation of Underpants!
One South African.....
whose identity will......
Be well known......
throughout badmovies.org.....
has underpants that
Defy biological theories......
and eject chunks..
Of contaminated elastic...
that shines brightly...
When viewed under......
a sunny day...
In the desert.....
from a storm-troopers'....
More aggressive perspective......
AKA Ape vision....
and sauteed with..
Cockroaches that can....
Immolate at will..
and poo out....
Charlie Brown clones..
plus shiny rainbows...
and Pink unicorns....
that love to..
ice skate backwards.
These odd traits
Opened many doors......
and slaughtered many...
Unknowingly complicit bystanders.....
eating Apple Pies....
and candy-coated nipples..
on three breasted....
sportscoats invented by
Barney the Dinosaur.
A small Torosaurus.....
called Secks, came....
and went without...
sowing his seeds...
Of love with......
with wandering glyptodons
who ate his
spoons of TERROR!
Secks had a
huge golden horn...
protruding out of
His furrowed brow.....
that was milked....
For maximum profit.....
or so he....
Wanted to believe......
Secks then gave
the finger to
Trendy weekend activists.....
who dabbled in..
Writing tedious articles.....
about Queen Elizabeth II..
cleaning her crown ...
jewels. Meanwhile Bob...
the killer, came...
To the conclusion....
that life was...
Predictable unless a.....
mutated psychotic banana...
Was created in....
darkly-lit genetic labs..
Dedicated to preserving.....
Princess Leia's brain..
And Luke's as..
it was killing...
me softly with
A heartfelt dissertation......
20 Ton Excalibur.
Skilled blacksmiths toiled.....
candy from Hell...
Was sold illegally.....
to steroid- abusing....
Wrestlers who wanted.....
some good soda...
to drown out...
Transformers: The Twilight....
Of Vampire Vehicles".....
pansies, that whine....
because they wanted..
hot-dog killing...
psychos to kiss.
dead frogs. In....
French public debate....
leading to sloppy...
Wine making practices.....
Clipped cat claws..
Were boiled in......
rancid rat stew..
Which was expensive....
compared to unfermented
unicorn tears, surprisingly.
(note: is it okay to terminate a sentence like I just did?)
"Yes, Flick," said
the mysterious Reverend...
Smith as he......
threw a dagger..
at an invading
Platoon of dancing....
intoxicated mischievious leprechauns.
Highly trained gnomes.....
were highly amused...
By synchronised swimmers.....
that drowned in..
a puke puddle...
Left by elephants......
who had seen
too many bad...
eighties campy musical
productions that starred..
John Travolta's neighbour......
I'm really craving a nice, juicy steak right now.
Quote from: Joe the Destroyer on October 01, 2010, 04:39:13 PM
I'm really craving a nice, juicy steak right now.
umm...wrong thread :bouncegiggle:
Bullwinkle J. Mouse,
craved veggie burgers...
but an omelet
filled with petrol..
rubber suits contaminated...
the burgers by..
taking a leak
Into the ketchup....
and ruining Heinz's....
Long-established reputation......
of making Ketchup...
Suitable for export......
illegal Australian candy...
Whose increasing value......
made Big cheese...
Wary of competition.....
called the Olympics...
Where javelin throwers....
killed Rush Limbaugh...
With informed arguments.....
against an ape's
Right to own.....
Beer, bullets, babes....
Any motor vehicle......
on fire in....
An underground carpark.......
but instead, ended...
Up blocking junctions.....
between ships and...
Carefully placed mines
'twas very disasterous...
Due to magnetic....
spiders 'n' badgers...
Wearing luminous lifejackets.....
composed entirely of..
Poor quality materials......
stitched together cheaply...
By bored housewives....
only wearing lingerie....
While waiting for......
bunnies and Rabbits....
Who skillfully repaired.....
Bull's Crazed brain.....
Using Freud's patented.....
needlepoint kits. The
wide wooly planet...
of Batwoman made....
for an appropriate
Afternoon matinee performance.....
attended by elderly..
zombified senoir citizens....
eating candy apples ...
Provided by local...
car eating goblins....
Whose stomach acid.....
was a useful
Defence against cuisine.....
with Cheez Whiz...
and Liquid Plum'r..
used liberally as
stuffing for turkeys....
with six legs.
Eminent poultry experts.....
with six legs
And ample feathers......
with V-Eight engines.....
But no petrol.....
soda cans that...
Were readily available......
along with beef....
Jerky that was.....
covered in radioactive.....
Mustard oozing from.....
diseased cow eyes..
Requested by chefs.....
from outer space...
who had extremely
Powerful night vision.....
were cannibals, as
A census taker.....
puked up bullets.....
Fired by angry.....
midgets in graveyards..
Who resented visiting....
cat piloted UFOs..
Whose sonic booms.....
rivaled the noisy
jackhammers used by...
transvestites and drag.....
queen miners from
the planet POWERBALL.
Beyond the toilet.
END, chapter two.
In the near...
future, megalomaniacal polliwogs..
and sparkling troglodytes...
crucifying Qatar's rapper..
..were seen enjoying..
Wild block parties....
every Saturday night ...
Except if rain....
killed many bullies...
Who earned contempt.....
warrants which caused...
the Giant Claw
drink Italian Sodas...
and eat John...
Wayne's stetson with......
blue cranberry sauce...
crispy potato pancakes ...
And strong coffee.....
with cream and...
A complimentary mint.....
flavored banana split...
brought people indigestion..
But no refund.....
was given because..
kids ate free.
Between shifts making.....
babies and trains....
were talented bees...
Whose honey delighted....
Queen Latifah's ovaries..
and Christmas trees...
Causing conspiracy theories.....
regarding the connection
Between Templer Knights.....
and crop circles.
Medieval agricultural techniques......
yielded benefits by..
afforded wondrous splendor....
To close relations.....
of Madonna's gardener...
Whose prize winning.....
orchids of death....
were sent to...
Charles Manson's cell..
where they became
jailhouse currency exchanged
for extended priveleges....
and flying, flaming
Kites for smuggling....
rum filled coconuts ...
and Hitler's brain....
erroneously delivered to..
A Stalinist psychic.....
wearing black stilettos...
and see-thru underwear..
leading to widespread...
PANIC! Nuclear testing.....
which was saved
from a ban
By dangerous asteroids.....
big as Manhattan...
and as wide...
as Oprah's waistline..
It's no joke...
some gay men....
actually favored annihilation
of Mosquitoes and
rotten killer tomatoes...
who ate Paris...
Hilton's pet poodle...
and threw up..
all over retrorussell's
white denim pants....
he borrowed from
Darksider's Big and
psychotic older sister..
who had big.....
beer jugs which....
Constantly leaked when.....
DarkSider tried to
drink from them.
and p**sed in.....
A local reservoir......
full of bass.....
Guitar playing mermaids.....
ballistic dragon ninjas....
Katana-wielding gillmen.....
flavored raspberry nuts....
Caused tooth decay....
in flying squirrels....
Leading to shortages......
of Cows and....
methane gas. Lacking
intelligence, monkey ninjas.....
threw turd shurikens..
At television reporters.......
especially at Fox....
Pundits who claimed.....
Dan Rather eats
Baked beans before....
killing helpless baby....
buttercups with a...
deadly gaseous emission...
Accidentally discovered during.....
the moon landing...
near Uranus where
An ancient pyramid....
sprang unexpectedly from..
a Jell-o mold
Discovered by renowned....
porn collector Mr.
T-fanantic and....
his hermaphroditic mother
Whose Denver Broncos.....
could have fathered...
the lowly Ratboy..
, but that's a
Mystery never likely...
Potato Head who ...
Provided starch for...
Bull's homie, Crazy....
Horse who knew.....
nefarious nookie nectar...
the life blood...
of the slave
Class of insects.....
that tap dance ...
On network television....
"This is B.S.".....
Except for the....
colorful chameleon centipedes...
who copulate frequently..
During the spring.....
acid chocolate rain.....
with peppermint knobs...
and strawberry bulges.
drinks with a....
pint of arsenic
Gladly delivered to.....
orphanages all across...
Central parts of....
my anatomy were
Carefully studied for......
an alien's probing.....
insectoid elongated feelers....
eating 24LBS. Lard.....
Derived from contented......
doughnuts listening to.....
Talented lounge singers......
for evidence of
Dancing Monkeys. Whales....
wearing red hats ...
Taunted harpoon wielding....
math equations to....
Calculate the energy....
of how burgers....
Should REALLY taste......
like banana trees....
Or fresh pineapples.....
flavored cheese rocks....
Generously provided by.....
Batman and Firefly....
To persuade Alfred......
Hitchcock to make...
Films with Lassie......
going down the...
Road to ruin....
to save Timmy.
After digging for.....
radioactive golden spiders....
In central London....
Ferris wheel of....
Stock market fortunes....
that will quadruple ...
for fungus farmers
sewing petticoats for.....
Bull's pet poodles
that The DarkSider....
neutered with a
rapier made from....
stolen copper wire...
from manhole covers....
Scrap metal pirates....
seeking for Treasure...
Amid discarded hubcaps.....
from Russian trains....
Contaminated by fallout.....
and cosmic waves...
Absorbed by crystals......
which turned acidic-greenish....
When soaked with....
Bull's Insano Queso....
After an intense.....
prostate exam on....
An unwilling subject......
named Mitchell! Cheese...
Flavoured corn snacks......
were popular with
the population of
Alphagetti Gobblers who...
morphed into jack-o-lanterns..
on Christmas day
Scattering bewildered reindeer.....
into a monastery ...
housing sacred cows...
Surplus to requirements....
of Hindu Love
Poets who lamented.....
barf bags on...
Short haul flights....
to Washington State...
Where intense rainfall......
made President Obama
reconsider whether naked....
midgets should jump
into a Lava...
Flow to appease.....
to ant piles...
Which had evolved....
hairy wolf spiders ....
to eat parasites.....
Imported with fruit....
baskets. The spiders
Quickly overthrew all.....
Nazi regime newcomers..
In Latin America....
and underseas Atlantis...
rose the rosebud....
from the landfill ...
opposed the spiders
Whose silken empire.....
burned with flesh...
Contaminated by chronic....
alien genetic manipulation...
that turned it
Against encyclopedia salesmen.....
listening to melodeath...
while masturbating to
spider solitaire's amazing...
amazing lack of
any apparent hygiene..
within its insides...
and its brainless....
algorithms programmed by
Educated male models.....
and Playboy bunnies...
who enjoy hasbrowns
Between surgical procedures......
of installing toilets....
On Greyhound Buses.....
that charge $20.00
for exotic chairs.....
so pedestrians can
fart in them....
before taking a
Sixty mile hike....
up Mount Everest ...
In blizzard conditions.....
without snowshoes. Getting
Increasingly frustrated by.....
this thread, Andrew
made his pancakes.....
with explosive dough
and chipped teeth..
and served them
To mortal enemies....
of the Smurfs
Including genocidal alchemists.....
who snort poprocks
Imported by columbians....
supported by the
Notorious splinter group....
better known as
Anarchist lounge singers.......
who eat Rolaids
On special occasions.....
such as circumcisions...
Or royal weddings....
between starfish and
Reluctant box jellyfish.....
venomous venom's which....
Deterred skin divers.....
on "Dirty Jobs".....
From investigating plastic.....
battery operated sheep..
Deployed by Russian....
UFOs and Nuclear....
Bombs lost since.....
the Korean War...
that released gases..
That restarted evolution......
of Monkey brains....
Allowing them to.....
change their ape..
like appearance into ...
one resembling feces
from a snake's....
narrow behind. When
Unknown medical experts....
performed at the circus ...
Replacing lion tamers.....
riding on Harley's.....
Herding stampeding zebras......
and squishing Rob....
Roy's secret stash.....
into something resembling
Wholesome home cooked.....
Hamburger Helper mixed
With live worms....
and delicately seasoned
With sage and.....
tar poured from
An abandoned factory.....
located in Disney's
House of Horrors....
Where Minnie Mouse....
ate dusty flubber...
And she drifted....
Along the Alps....
Causing Swiss bankers....
fall down Mt.....
Blanc after slipping....
off a bottle....
Discarded by Austrian....
bodybuilder: Arnold Schwarzenegger.
The lack of....
any deductive reasoning..
caused Inspector Clay....
to wear panties
Over his face....
and a bowtie
To seem respectable......
to the Andalusian
Gypsy dancing girld....
holding shiney tambourines ...
While energetic guitarists.....
slowly fail at....
whammy bar movement
At the climax.....
of an opera...
at a Denny's
featuring singing waitresses ...
as Clay investigated
the mysterious disappearance
of The Rev
Martin Luther King
who's actually alive..
and with Elvis...
Presley's secret child
with Vampira's clone...
and is planning
A surprise comeback....
at the World...
Premiere of David.....
H.'s porno that....
Was banned in....
51 states and...
Tijuana for depictions
of graphic dismemberments....
of eyelids causing
very creepy stares..
and a demand
of Root beer.....
to wash out
The bitter taste....
of wallpaper paste.
Garish pink curtains.....
caused vomiting of....
manatees in New
Guinea where hunters.....
sought their nostrils
For dubious medicines......
weiners and bologna...
Were finely sliced...
for malnourished guppies
or for cannibals.
Mysterious meat suppliers....
hunt homeless people...
seeking wieners and
The best mustard.....
flavored ice cream......
packed in seaweed...
with chocolate chips...
Skillfully added by....
Catwoman and Batman.
No spilled milk.....
ever lasted in
a crazy person's
Bizarre secret ritual.....
of eating eyeballs....
with ham hocks
Washed down with....
a streaming firehouse
water at 1200PSI.....
which made JJ80
Redouble his efforts.....
in adopting prawns
Destined for exploitation.....
in slave rings
Deviously organized by.....
disembodied parakeet heads..
Their ghostly wails...
were recorded on..
VHS and Skeletons
Rapidly disintegrated into.....
bloody pools of
drinkable rat semen...
Which seriously polluted....
the minds of
Manic French philosophers.....
breakdancing to polka
With beauty queens.....
at a Walmart
in West Berlin...
populated by nuns..
wearing Groucho glasses.. . .
and Pikachu tails..
And steel wings,,,,
with extra commas
To adequately explain....
why they urinated..
Upon seeing the.....
glory of retrorussell's
Rather interesting retorts.....
to JJ80's political
debates on kerosene..
lantern taxes. The
next 24 hours
of torrential rains ...
Helpfully cleansed the.....
Mind of Bull.....
Of fast moving....
sloths. I am....
Still completely dedicated....
to intenet porn
Involving furry animals....
and their inserstion
Into inappropriate places....
making surgeons wonder
How to remove....
rat droppings from
The tummy button....
of other rodents
Who had betrayed....
their obese president...
But were indicted.....
on jaywalking charges
After being observed....
by well hung
Athletic traffic cops.....
sporting pink spandex
And tartan scarves.....
and ate Gloworms
marinated in teriyaki..
sauce and drano ...
Which caused violent.....
criminals to elude
Angry, baying mobs....
that hurled dentures..
Straight to needy.....
toothless Komodo Dragons ...
living in Wisconsin
Near a park....
with a waterslide
That was dangerous.....
with no water
Losing valuable customers.....
from New England
Whose belief in
monogamy backfired because
Temptation continually bothered......
the Pilgrams and
Iroquois medicine men.....
Meanwhile, The Conquistadors
Investigated Aztec pyramids.....
with National Geographic
Gaining exclusive access....
to Paris Hilton's
Reptilian shape-shifting....
purse that attacked
National Enquirer employees.....
who took pictures
Intended for sale.....
to blind Templars..
at craft fairs
Where sinister clerics.....
worshipped munching chickens...
whilst flicking boogers..
on windshields from
Perilously close ranges....
to appease their
Shadowy, dubious sponsors.....
dabbling in black magic ...
But professing devotion.....
to toaster pastires
Covered in mould.....
that had personality
But no style.....
because they shopped
During power blackouts.......
at thrift stores
With limited stocks...
of plaid bellbottoms
Yellow leisure suits.....
and white spandex
Plus hammer pants....
and wooden shoes.
In lighter news..
a happy kitty
fell from a..
tree into snowbanks...
filled with mattresses..
But still managed.....
to clean Trevor's
Carelessly neglected pair.....
of butt cheeks..
of the tuna
carelessly smeared by..
sea-lamprey that sucks....
blood from genitalia..
Carelessly dangled over...
Trevor's hinder by
some dental floss
and mint gum.
They moved closer.....
towards the mystical
Magical garden gate....
and called out...
"Fresh vegetables please"!
But nothing answered...
so they exploded
With intense rage.....
at their own
Wildly inaccurate predictions.....
pertaining to hotdogs
Encouraging juvenile delinquents....
to breakdance badly...
On public highways.....
before fat pornstars..
Very openly displayed....
their cooking talents
And baked cakes.....
made with sawdust
And dead cockroaches....
and served on
poopy garlic toast..
at Olive Garden
while waiters sang..
Karma Chameleon offkey
Annoying Boy George....
in rehab so
A wedding singer....
groped the groom
Allowing the bride....
to expose her..
Shady insider dealings....
with Chef Boyardee
Concerning price fixing....
of the World
of Warcraft's bad.....
-ass mo fo
archer named Cedric
The Entertainer who....
juggled pancakes and
Spilled maple syrup.....
in a Buick
Belonging to dangerous.....
but thrifty amoeba
Who saved vouchers....
for Futureshop where...
Tomorrow's innovations cost....
$5 worth of..
Flesh from nearest....
Ill behaved owls..
wearing pink raincoats ...
in the sunshine
While wishing darkness.....
upon all seagulls
for pecking at...
People who feed.....
James Ngyuen. For
Several geological epochs.....
and for laughs...
Aliens caused earthquakes....
by smashing many...
glasses of milk
which noisily splashed..
into the Nile
causing homogenized flooding..
in the Sphinx's
Undiscovered operating theatre...
that was showing
Organ harvesting techniques.....
of grey aliens...
Harvesting lion tails.....
In darkest Africa....
on a screen
Clearly visible in.....
JJ80's backyard shed
Which could levitate....
upon his command
Despite containing plenty....
of endless weeping
Of Gorgo's enemies....
who were vacationing
On a beach....
where starfish mated
Incessantly under optimum.....
conditions which weren't
Appropriate for lobsters.....
with gastrointestinal problems
Whose toxic discharges.....
melted beachgoers' faces
Preventing beach volleyballl....
on hot pavement
Impressing Olympic athletes....
without product endorsements
To confidently approach...
steroid companies for
Performance enhancing substances....
for their genitals
For alternative careers....
in sperm donation
For Russian biologists....
trying to invent
Superheroic, immortal cosmonauts....
of cheesiest designs.....
In comic books....
written by French...
My Little Ponies..
galloping across meadows ...
with their typewriters
in preperation for
stirring, erotic novels..
Set during the.....
War Of 1812
and involving bayonets..
shaped like spoons
causing mass destruction......
At Disney World ...
endangering cursed lovers
on Space Mountain
to jump off ...
the top ropes...
onto spikes below..
covered in marshmallow ...
flavored laundry detergent..
causing sepsis in
Every person present.....
and animal, too....
Alarming medical practitioners.....
to gynecology issues
Caused by aliens.....
who inserted probes
into their driveway.....
driven by hammers..
which turned hamburgers.....
into pina coladas..
blended with codfish
And fried in.....
dirty diesel fuel ...
. Cher vomited blood
but no one
Anticipated the depravity....
so everyone walked
Straight towards the.....
new bowling alley ...
and ordered shoes..
and hair gel
For maximum attractiveness......
and pure awesomeness
That didn't impress....
airport baggage handlers ...
or pizza deliverymen..
Who disposed of...
dead skunks into....
The food supply....
which Upton Sinclair.....
Used as inspiration.....
to order firetrucks....
To attend incidents....
created by drugged....
Ninja cavemen who.....
wear red bathrobes ...
under business suits..
and enjoyed salivating
over pig eyeballs..
That William Golding....
ate for lunch
at a picnic
Hosted by literate......
nazi drill sargeant
who hurled peas..
and carrots at ...
Reluctant, hesitant, stormtroopers.....
who all hate
Forms of resistance.....
by field mice
Who deciphered vital....
signs of John
McCain while shooting.....
Mediocre action movies....
directed by a
man-eating brain....
Inside a robotic....
dancing penguin who
Charmed unsuspecting shoppers.....
into having sex!
Nine months later.......
a mutated but
sexy model, puked....
To stay thin...
but gained 300lbs.....
After her wedding....
massacre, which became....
a national holiday
For mafia hitmen....
in southern Antartica...
Until ancient aliens......
crashed their spacecraft ...
into Mount Hood....
killing many dinosaurs...
and goat herders ...
and cute puppies
with bad breath ...
that make englishmen
Demand instant action....
and sexual fulfillment..
from insane gophers
wearing pink tutus...
and strap-on devices..
that send magical
Trade union opportunists.....
on immoral crusades
To steal jobs.....
from Indian telemarketers
with heavily irradiated
Ferocious adult tigers....
which lives on...
chicken noodle soup
without the noodles
and the chicken
was actually lamb
grown by inbreds..
which dinosaurs bowed...
and then chowed...
over the rainbow
Where a Tinman....
and a Scarecrow ...
and a Cowardly
solider had sex
Rather than attack....
GIANT ANTIMATTER BUZZARDS
Building their nests.......
inside JJ80's house.
It soon fled....
to DarkSider's bathroom
Where Admiral Akbar...
spotted a trap
That Darth Vader....
had left in
Endor's upper atmosphere.....
on Ewok's heads
To deter Chewbacca's...
hot lovemaking abilities
Starting forest fires....
that consumed ObiWan's
Famous Jedi bathrobe.....
making Buck Rogers
Give Tigerman mysterious.....
rashes on his
Hands and feet.....
and under his
Hairless Draconian armpits.....
Doctor Who was
Enjoying Admiral Adama's.....
homemade apple tarts
Coveted by Cylons.....
into mashed potatoes
Which proved inedible....
to homeless cats
that endlessly vomited...
old leather socks....
and GI Joes..
And Daleks, who...
wore leisure suits
And frequented discos.....
that involved EXTERMINATING...
John Travolta impersonators.....
from dancing the
funky chicken while
Evading imminent death.....
And molesting Mr. Walken.
with stewed prunes
And mouldy custard.....
acquired from obese..
Russian warlocks working.....
MEGA-DEATH RAYS imported...
from New Mexico...
Where Apache warriors.....
defecated on statues
and Highlander DVDs
Burned iron oxide......
into Big Bird..
while he was...
frenching Mr. Snuffelupagus..
BUT THEN A......!
bloody revolt led
by very spoony bards
Oops! That was 4! Oh well...
Let's try a.....
magic tire iron
Because supersonic rockets.....
embed themselves into..
Large passing asteroids....
from Oprah's butt..
to your table
But the waiter.....
just couldn't wait
And discarded my.....
personal Facebook page....
into an explosive...
Argument about repetitive.....
posting about lice
..before singing about..
Flawed theories about....
Men who wear...
sandpaper lined underwear..
while eating sausages...
and watching "Fringe".
The argument was
dismissed immediately by
a tribunal of
Very quickly abandoned....
French pig fetuses..
in machine oil
After health inspectors.....
noticed some dust
particles from Eegah!.....
on the new
big yellow submarine
That left Portsmouth......
Taking a dump....
Into the Atlantic.....
Ocean Liner, fouling....
Walrus breeding grounds......
mating with Cows....
Causing confused fishermen.....
to jump overboard....
And encounter mermaids....
doing "Skittles" commercials...
in real time
while holding large
flamethrowers that don't...
use conventional fuel
instead they use...
Vienna Sausage juice...
only found in...
the corpses of
Giant penguin demons
killed by ingesting..
sperm form pigs....
that ingested Liquid-Plumr..
Exploding Fly Parasite.....
and Crystal Pepsi.
Twelve Norwegian prostitutes
won the lottery......
Allowing them to....
gang bang with bbw lesbians.....
and several shemales
during Sunday service
Provoking rapturous applause.....
from Jimmy Stewart
Annoying Pat Boone....
who was worshiping
A dormant volcano....
which became active...
When he sang.....
"Baby Got Back"..
the "unplugged" version
through his nostrils..
causing boogers to
plug the volcano..
causing an implosion....
in the Bowels....
of sumo wrestlers
who scattered poop..
across Mike Rowe's
dirty sock drawer...
Attracting assorted vermin....
and Ninja Turtles ...
with wooden spoons
and hearty appetites..
craving for delicious...
brown, sticky goodness..
called poop. YOU....
missed yesterday's newsflash..
Jesus went fishing
and caught bread...
baked by Buddha
with yeast from
a large yak
swimming in jelly
and bacon bits
Purchased wholesale from.....
Uncle Johns Band
Whose rusty saxophones.....
were actually hamsters
with brass-plated
Orange road cones
So AndyC grabbed
a jar of
honey and spread
it on his..
living room wall
causing neighboring bears
to begin frantically
looking for the
the underground city...
where the midgets
worshipped Warwick Davis
and Herve Villechaize
while carving a
statue of Darksider
Which made lester1/2jr...
damn near flip
When socialist demonstrators....
dressed like puppies
smeared tapioca pudding
on a duck
For personal reasons....
Yngwie Malmsteen decided
To radically retune....
the radioactive possums
That Dame Edna.....
ate for dinner
Along with kangaroo.....
people with Motorhead
and PeTA members...
Deployed box jellyfish...
that Will Smith...
Kept as pets...
Until 'Seven Pounds'...
Changed his priorities....
to destroy copies...
of nude photos
of Sarah Palin..
kicking a baby
in the eyeball..
while holding gigantic
seances with neighbors..
including Vladimir Putin...
and Jackie Chan
trying to channel..
the spirit of...
Ernest T. Bass
while wearing fake
Fangs to intimidate.....
Eric Clapton fans
In Bangkok, Thailand..
eating pickled eggs
While avidly watching.....
snails fighting monkeys...
that hate all...
Taylor Swift fans
with a burning
yeast infection, caused...
By avoiding the .....
square dancers from
the KKK ball.
Suddenly a giant
water bottle spilled
into the subway ...
Drowning large numbers....
of gigantic ostriches ...
stuck in the
Mass of commuters....
in bathroom stalls
smeared with the
fecal matter of
Confused, elderly members....
in immobile wheelchairs
Who still dominated....
supply and demand
of the local...
Fresh fruit and .....
offal popover business
Which observant scavengers.....
ignored due to
Blatant vermin infestation.....
making JJ80 post
Increasingly disgusting compositions.....
about loitering in
Seedy amusement arcades....
with Charles Durning
Who excelled at...
Frogger high scores
But found Galaga....
kind of repetitive
Skee Ball, however
was causing riots
As Dan Marino.....
was throwing prizes
To Flipper's concubines.....
inside Old Navy
Destroyers now resting.....
With Andrew's Towell
in Boise, Idaho
home of the
Teenage Mutant Potatoes..
and WeedWhacker Willie
with his enormous
broken weed whacker.
and a small
fluffy dog named
Smacky Von Bingenburg
Who ferociously gnawed....
a marshmallow peep ...
shaped like a
vulva. Later on,
after the peep
waged war against
ALIEN NAZI ZOMBIES
for a reward
of 37 dollars
and a beer ...
the zombies recruited..
Charles Nelson Reilly
and Doug McClure...
to be cheerleaders
for the Panthers..
while eating Cheetos
and drinking acid....
Not the drug...
but acetylsalicylic acid
with a modified
bong complete with
Cheech and Chong
and Richard Kiel
riding on a
John Deere tractor
dragging a tree
dragging a Partridge...
and the corpse
of a wallaby..
Adolph Hitler's clone...
had some tea
made from p**s...
and a muffin
made from s**t
from a wallaby
Named Stevie. Meanwhile
Eva Braun ate..
rice and beans ...
while Mussolini sneezed
Without covering his.....
eyes so they
Closed VERY suddenly.....
causing him to
kick a puppy
into a compactor
But luckily a....
alcoholic midget cowboy
dove in and..
stole the magic
flute from Harry
The Wonder Mule
and his friend ...
the talking vagina....
named Dalton McGuinty
whose CD's sales.....
plummeted due to
low fat mayo
and pork rinds..
and deformed rabbits
that ingested tar..
and a large
Tyre that fell.....
:hot:
From roving gangs.....
of lesbian Eskimos
in Costa Rica
with help from
Carl Sagan's loudest.....
fart ever. Meanwhile
in Scotland, JJ80.....
Wrestled lake monsters.............
which caused Gorgo....
To take over.....
Mars, Saturn, Neptune....
But King Ghidorah.....
got eaten by.....
Gordon Ramsey after.....
Bad Mama Jamma
Crafted a harpoon......
out of styrofoam
and silk panties..
And a plectrum.....
made of poop
That rendered guitars.....
to fall apart....
During a solo.....
from the great
big chicken headed
Frank Perdue and
The Darksider, along....
with AndyC's pet
liger, the only....
one in Canada
where it mated.....
with an ant
creating the only
ligerant, or Liant.....
that ate clovers
and smoked Newports
laced with cyanide
and satin undies.....
once worn by
Bull and Trevor!
Fumigation crews arrived
and were chased
by Justin Bieber
who got shot.....
with silly string
by a transvestite.....
fork lift driver
, one of Trevor's
friend's, who loved....
cheese with spaghetti...
and paraplegic clowns..
And Conway Twitty
with bloodthirsty lust...
decided to slice
and dice Jason...
Statham's prize-winning
giant pumpkin patch
with wooden spoons
"STOP!!" Jason Shouted.
"I haven't even
had my coffee
and bagel with
dingleberry jelly. Eventually
they'll grow back..
abit fuzzier perhaps
But still healthy....
pink in color
Which attracted predators.....
and that dude
Who presented infomercials....
and lectures on
Migratory habits of.....
Armadillos and Chickens
Towards the coastline......
of Outer Bungholia
Where objectionable demonstrators.....
were waving flyswatters
tied to their
Hands for added.....
air speed velocity
To combat swarms.....
of angry pelicans ...
Whose vital habitat.....
was really moist
devil's food cake ...
Abandoned for centuries....
In Mortville. Oliver
the olive picker ...
Played the accordion....
as Billy Connolly
Helped Weird Al....
tackle an irate
Nirvana fan who.....
was lactose intolerant
and dying due
to ingested Clorox..
while poking 43
goats in the
Name of scientific....
porcupine avoiding dudes
who travelled in
Armoured vehicle convoys.....
while Terry Pratchett
took the subway
and started yelling
"Damn you AndyC!"
Damn You Darksider.....
BigFoots Aunt Edna
said remarking Bull's.....
affinity for pudding
Was genuinely intended.............
for mold collectors
who hate mold...
because its moldy
Sought alternative forms.......
of mutant sponges
For intimate cleansing......
of private parts..
using borax and
A stiff brush....
made from elephant....
Bones and nasal.............
hairs from a
Muscular bull rhinocerous.............
who smoked pot
With rebellious leopards.......
at the aquarium
Who hunted manatees......
using a pitchfork
wrapped with ducttape
To avoid detection.....
by Toucan Sam
Who violently pecked.....
at shredded wheat
To express disgust......
at Uncle Ben's
Virtual monopoly on.......
use of midgets
In paddy fields.....
wearing Hula skirts
Standing knee deep.....
in the dead...
leaking heap of
used sanitary napkins..
and empty containers
of personal lubricant
from the personal
devices Joan Rivers...
inserts into her
computer's USB drive
To view blueprints.......
of brothels and
Seedy opium dens......
that she plans...
To unleash during.....
a birthday party...
for George Romero
Where Tom Savini......
vigorously pleasured himself..
with a porcupine
In surprising places......
such as Walmart
Hardware aisles or.......
The Chicken Ranch
with no chickens...
just Dolly Partons
Extensive stetson collection....
which she keeps
7 gigantic evil
Silicon based lifeforms......
that shoot superglue
Sticking cruise missiles.....
to gorilla's armpits
Incinerating numerous fleas......
and one poodle
Whose owner retaliated.....
by genocide of......
All cats near.....
his overfilled trashcans
Who scattered bones.....
over his patio
Attracting rancid raccoons....
and The DarkSider
Focused his attentions.....
on his toes ...
As Santa's elves......
screwed each other.....
With gleeful enthusiasm
as Santa ate
Roasted venison and .......
Honey Nut Cheerios
And some brandy.....
blended into milkshakes..
he drank from
A human skulll....
he bought from
A bounty hunter....
while on vacation
in western Tanzanika..
with Dallas cheerleaders... :buggedout:
drunk on fermented
pinto beans, gave
a ransom note
to Madonna's parents..
We dont want
our Daughter back!"
So Sean Pean
opened a can...
of potted meat
and made love
to Maddona's mom...
with a jackhammer
Leading to hours.....
of awkward explaining
To local carpenters.....
who had discovered..
Their cars covered.......
with spam and
Very cheap salami.....
Andre the Giant
Had carelessly misplaced....
in jj80's socks...
with some beans
Which JJ devoured.....
with some flapjacks
Illegally obtained from......
a member of
Notorious rap star......
Vanilla Ice's posse
Who evaded vigilantes.....
on the freeway
By convincingly impersonating......
Richard Pryor's uncle
Causing his aunt....
to take a
"Superman Three" poster....
off JJ80's wall
Which didn't belong....
to him anyways
But was found.....
by DarkSider's best
Equipped surveillance expert.....
who was schooled
By FBI experts.....
in third grade
Then traffic cops.....
traveling on jetskis
Kidnapped and brainwashed.....
some deformed chipmunks
Who had rebelled.....
against nut diets
Drinking only blood.....
from juice boxes
Furtively imported from.....
Detroits very own
waste management plant
for lazy vampires.
Covert cybernetic research.....
failed to prove
That human brains.....
are transferable nor
Capable of comprehending......
elevated goat mysticism
Invented by nomadic......
midgets from Nomadia
Whose camel herding......
caused traffic jams
For silk traders.....
at JC Pennys
Who felt cheated.....
Christopher Walken out...
of the closet
As a supporter...
of frying pans
Made from recycled....
Lite Brites and
Skeletor action figures......
Meanwhile Santa Claus
aimed at DarkSider's
Obvious dislike of....
large Statler Brothers
nude Playmate pictures..
with extra boobs
which made Menard...
Utterly delighted but....
counting the nipples
And finding interesting.....
alien implants on
Skilled rodeo riders......
who were male
Despite their obvious.....
lack of charisma
Or singing ability.....
in Streisand tunes...
Forcing Celine Dion....
to go gansta
Costing Puff Daddy.....
a shot at
Full spectrum domination.....
of Broadway show
Choreography after most.....
actors quit trying
To break dance....
and opted for
Careers in mime.....
exploitation on film
Which French directors.....
called "The most...
Dangerous Silence Ever".....
however Roger Ebert
Robustly expressed hatred......
with his quote...
"I sorta disliked....
the film's use
Of product placement.....
and hand creams
To show radical.....
Pagans with hairy
smelly big feet ...
That Stonehenge isn't......
anywhere near Utah
So relieved Mormons......
who ate toenails..
would forget Attica."
Hardened Cold Warriors.....
eating rum balls
Launched a satellite.....
from a Volkswagon
Pulling a trailer......
filled with pollutants
Which broke down.....
and started dancing
Eventually transforming into.....
something resembling mucus
After leaking acid......
into fruit salads
Utterly ruined dessert.....
meant for Bono..
Who sent Edge......
to get cigarettes
For developing countries......
that didn't smoke..
But simply exported.....
bad karma towards
Their unwilling benefactors......
who would've rather
Invested in creating.....
durable corduroy pants
Suitable for disco.....
dancing NFL referees..
who were endorsed
By John Madden....
yet panned by
Almost all cheerleaders......
that didn't shave
Their beards unless.....
they used machetes
As no razor.....
would handle them
Through sheer density......
and financial obligations
To registered charities.....
like Satan's Buttsniffers..
, Booger Eaters Anonymous
and Small Animal....
Haters who won't......
Rock the nations
But practiced dubious.....
Buffalo sex games
On seedy prairies......
with pepper shakers
Carved by Sioux....
Ronald McDonald clones..
Whose burgers tasted....
like baby kittens
But actually contained.....
no meat whatsoever
only moldy cheeze ...
, old sweaty socks
and a partridge...
family member, Danny..
Bonaduce's crack dealer
who ate pigeons..
while poking his
Elongated Man poster...
with the business
partner of Martin
Landau. Meanwhile Ed...
, Just Ed, also
admitted to liking
Abstract cubist sketches......
of dairy farms
Where rectangular cows.....
and square chickens
Were stalked by.....
medium size goats
Equipped with binoculars......
and 4 bananas
To boost energy......
and eliminate cramps
Through careful exercises.....
employing hand puppets.
of Fonzy and
Jar Jar Binks
were both shot...
(Couldn't resist)
by Jackie Chan..
with a camera
in New Orleans.....
at the Superdome
viewing Monster Jam.....
eating Pop Tarts
and skinning live...
Shrimp Bat Larva.
What were we
the imdb ratings...
board members, implying..
Who farted? When
Bill Cosby's "Ghost Dad"...
claimed the souls
of Richard Dawson
Rich Little, and...
Mr. Dick Martin
while drinking Tang
red ***** juice.
Restrorussell exclaimed, "How...
Now Brown Cow?
What's the five
dollar clap cure
Sold by gypsies......
and Burt Reynolds
Donated his moustache....
Pee Wee Herman
Added his collection......
of gooey stuff
Procured from farmyards......
and theater floors
by undead dwarves
Wearing protective clothing.......
and Santa hats
On Easter Sunday....
But sadly, earth
mooned the sun
Provoking solar flares.....
and hot beer
Very quickly evaporated.....
from confused penguins
lost within Arctic...
strip clubs and
eventually found by
Billy Dee Williams
while on holiday
, drinking Colt 45
out of cartons
through his nose..
into his @$$...
and back again
suddenly John Ritter
returned to life
and said HI
Gimme a hug!
And a pumpkin
narrowly missed his
Rush 2112 poster
"That's a large...
spicy meatball. Ed
Asner requests you
stop touching his
collection of "Rocky"...
And Bullwinkle'' lunch
pails he collected..
from Frank Zappa
Fending off weasels......
that eat Thermoses..
full of consomme
and hedgehog sweat..
Flavoured with garlic.....
and ranch dressing
Served with celery......
by Bill Nye
the Soup Guy
at your command
Rocket launchers aimed...
at a barn
were deflected by..
Rudy Ray Moore
and his deadly
fanged midget offsrping...
dressed like puppies
that sniffed glue
With Kobe Bryant
in Central Park
to celebrate the
Karma loss of....
Andrew Lloyd Webber
who joined Badmovies.org...
wearing only his
zebra striped underwear
drinking malt liqour
from a juicebox
His username is...
The Darksider. He
eats small gerbils
gave his password
by zombified chickens...
but refused to
compromise his art
of juggling cats
For commercial purposes.....
under a waterfall
Where any slip.......
meant sudden giggles
From unscrupulous fishermen......
dressed like Madonna
Who used conical.......
eyes made of
Sharpened, stainless steel......
to thwart evil
tuna fish sandwiches
Spreading food poisoning......
in premature walruses
Bred in captivity......
by horse groomers
Tired of hooves.......
constantly bruising their
Very poorly cushioned......
hair follicles causing
Distinctive bald patches.......
and midlife crisis
Amongst English Lords......
and American yuppies
Trying to purchase.....
Snuggies at pharmacies
On Mercury's surface.......
pink angora sweaters...
were worn by
Public relations experts......
who were introverted
Due to cultural.......
John Denver fanatics
that drank alcoholic...
vomit straight from
An anteater's skull......
worshipped for centuries ...
by swarming gnats
who sacrificed budgies....
To space buzzards.....
made of anti-matter.
Last Tuesday, several..
species of small
toads started carving
meticulously detailed symbols...
of unmentionable doom
For underwater ecosystems......
in danger of..
tripping over large
elephant dung trails..
from Horton's @$$...
to your freezer
thats full of
chocolate Weeble Wobbles
and a goat
with severe incontinence
had an idea
concerning how to..
how to mate
with robot dolphins...
doing the Limbo
wearing ice skates ...
made from cheese
and pig snot
while farting gently
in seal's mouths
while they applauded..
various juggling acts
consisting of midgets
tossing up shurikens..
and a duck
while standing on..
a milk crate
smeared with butter ...
and bacon grease
from Arnold Ziffle
Meanwhile in retrorussell's
secret backyard outhouse,
flies passed out..
A.J. Bauer's collection...
of midget porn
featuring Ewoks and
a horny possum
going down on..
an up escalator
while on fire.
When Christopher Walken ...
hopped up and
Challenged a kangaroo......
to a duel
farting the alphabet
without the vowels
for 25,000 dollars..
paid in pennies
stolen from the
pockets of AndyC
and Mofo Rising.
Menard giggled maniacly
while cooking omelets
made from the eggs of endangered birds
Quote from: 100Nights on January 10, 2011, 09:17:11 AM
made from the eggs of endangered birds
Just a reminder, three words only per post thanks!
who dressed like..
Early fighter pilots......
on anabolic steroids..
Whose cockpits contained......
no visible seating
but many ornate
*sorry about before. different rules than I am used to for this game*
antique cheese graters
Were sold to....
Myposian sheep herders
Whose milk supply......
had an odor
More pungent than......
unwashed homeless people
on hot days
In a shantytown.....
outside of Mortville
in the ghetto
across town from
JJ80's summer home
On the outskirts.....
of sewer plants
Which constantly leaked......
what people thought
Was cotton candy.......
but really was
Toxic shaving foam......
recently discarded by..
bikini wax salons
After local doctors......
deemed it too
Alluring to display......
at local convents..
during bingo nights
Raising funds for.....
baby seal clubbers
To control overpopulation......
in city zoos
After several fatal......
exploding beer cans
poisoned the river...
intoxicating the wild....
cross-eyed Indonesian alligators..
living in tents
with blow-up dolls
and large sponges
made to absorb
nocturnal emissions and
Carefully cleanse entire.......
toxicities from farts...
emitted by Yanni..
while watching Phantasm
and touching himself
Far too intimately......
with wax-coated
Implements imported from......
JJ80's basement in...
An illegal factory......
in Guam, that...
Exported defective parts......
of elderly actresses
Whose younger boyfriends......
hate saggy breasts...
And ceaselessly demanded......
denture cream and
Extensive plastic surgery......
on their tallywhackers
To avoid ridicule.....
from bad comedians...
Who secretly underwent.....
sensitivity training by
Senior mafia hitmen.....
who liked to...
Hold coffee mornings......
and play cribbage
With old ladies.......
dressed like leprechauns
Eating Lucky Charms.....
with dull knives
To avoid indigestion.......
and tapeworms named
After eminent biologists.......
Pancho and Lefty
Whose experiments created......
diarrhea-ejecting chickens..
and talking skunks
with enough whimsy
that would kill...
the local tribes...
four times over
the river and
shoot Ellen DeGeneres...
a distance of
about three feet
Into Mexican territory.....
where local revolutionaries..
ate pork rinds
dipped in babaghanouj
And drank tequila......
passion fruit spritzers
Before firing squads.....
of lazy workers
went on strike
against zoning regulations
regarding baby tattooing
In tribal cultures......
near active volcanos
Which threatened supplies.....
and ImaginaryFoot's porn...
Career looked precarious......
Time for beer
And quiet reflection......
said your mother.
Many miles away.......
Roscoe P. Coltrane
Purchased powerful magnets......
from traveling Gypsies
Who carried enormous.....
sacks of oranges
In their caravans......
driving towards Maine
To obtain supplies....
to make omelets
For forty people......
wearing Hammer pants
and elbow pads
Ready to jump.....
onto thumbtacks naked
on Oprah Winfrey's
New reality show.....
titled, "Screw you..."
Its Party Time"
Tom Cruise exclaimed......
"Hells yeah, bizzatch!"..
as Katie Holmes
Fetched "Battlefield: Earth"...
and a sledgehammer
and proceeded to..
Rearrange the entire......
livingroom area of
The Mayor of......
McCheese who was
Absolutely incorruptible except......
for cardiac disease
Which slowly killed......
hope for eels
Developing humanoid limbs......
for throwing darts
In vaudeville acts......
at rogue jellyfish
and giant octopi...
Who viciously stung......
people's feelings with
Forceful ecological rhetoric.......
tap danced skillfully
with Rod Steiger
and the ROCKETTES.
Meanwhile at the "Legion of Doom"!
(Sorry for cheating the word limit. I HAD to do this joke.)
Mr. Bob Dobalina
filed papers to
join the Smurfs
despite being orange
They replied with
an email to
Mr. Franz Kafka..
He wrote back
"Whereupon this twilight...
, it be dark
One ring to...."
rule the mall
"...but forget not..."
...the Orange Julius..."
"...drinking competitions held...
biweekly near the
Mordor visitors' centre
for if ye
smell like cheese
the orange scent...
"will lead ye..."
to Sandra Oh
" Meanwhile, Twilight fans
have bad taste
In black pudding....
made from used
blue sweat pants.
"Somebody stole my
Edward Cullen vibrator!"
ginsu knife combo
and a turtle
disguised as a
human paraquat named
David Lee Roth
!" fat girl cried
Horace loved her
Biscuits and Gravy
she cooked for
Taylor Laughtner, hoping....
he'd choke on...
very small prunes
pooped by witches
Who deliberately harassed
Dennis the Menace
with electric eggbeaters
Alerting near neighbours....
to hide yo'
delicious navy beans
or you'll be..
attacked by BatBoy
wearing extremely expensive
Scooby Doo underpants
That glow under
water where Neptune
shines on your...
Log Cabin Syrup
flavored liquor. It
really sucks when..
Celine Dion sings
Polish folk songs
written by Chinamen
Who had emigrated.......
from China obviously
and Yugoslavia sneakily
shot them in
on a trebuchet
Provided by Normans......
Party Supplies near
A seedy warehouse.....
that distributed pornography..
For "Twilight" fans......
that had edward
Scissorhands masturbating during..
Scenes from "Beetlejuice".....
one in particular:
Involving intensely gothic......
visions of cupcakes
Baked by vengeful.....
deceased truck drivers
Who haunted motels.....
because they liked
Closely observing rituals.......
involving vending machines
That dispensed endless.....
globs of creamy
Rice pudding suitable.........
only for washing
Large quantities of.......
L.A Lakers cheerleaders
panty period stains..
to ensure that
they smell fresh...
from the oven
for lunch rush
causing mass fart-tation
among drunk rednecks
eating goat soap....
while watching "Cops"
and playing bagpipes
made from bladders....
Of lake monsters......
from Ontario. Pipers
(offspring of Roddy)
Wore plaid constantly........
with glittery overalls
and wiggley things
in their ears
while watching DOLEMITE
at family reunions
of salmon oddly...
Avoided by bears......
because of grenades
Accidentally discarded by.......
models playing soldiers...
in push-up bras
Equipped with surveillance.....
video of Menard
cutting up dead...
titans and mongloids...
were playing hopscotch
while wearing snowshoes ...
at the beach
during a hurricane
created by alien...
dudes that had
dropped some acid
watching "Time Bandits"
the edited version
7 minutes long
which included bloopers
and boring commentary
from Jay Leno
and David Hasselhoff....
Kool-Aid Man's
commentary was added..
about the wall...
he broke through..
while chasing Schwarzenegger.....
to get head..
cheese and formica
for Ronald McDonald...
eating at Wendy's.
In other news..
I, the narrator
dont smoke crack
without my trusty
five foot bong
named "BongZilla Bob"
I stole from
Finland, October 2006
during a blackout
after drinking Jagermeister
and playing Rush
the Court after
eating large kumquats
chock full of
peanut butter fudge
and headless mice
imported from Disneyland
by Amish prostitutes
in their tights
dressed like Robin
Williams. Meanwhile in...
Camp North Star
the boys planned
to raid the
local brothel
for sideshow performers
known for standing
by heavy machinery.
Tonight's movie is..
Attack of the
Mutant Wooly Worms
from Neptune, but
they spoke French...
with Swedish accents
inflected with Tuvan
voice changing machines...
covered with stickers
of My Little
pony from hell
in a handbasket
made of Legos ...
. Wang Dang Doodle
cries in pain...
when he touches..
Justin Bieber CDs.
Wang got his
E-mail account suspended......
for stalking midgets
With a crowbar...
glued to his
favorite place for
clown boxing time.
Look at those
large testicles" exclaimed...
Bobcat Goldthwaite and
Mr. Eddie Deezen..
as they gazed
at DarkSider's crotch
:teddyr:
as he winked
at bag ladies
dressed like strippers
at Dollywood when
a massive earthquake
broke them apart
into millions of.....
white lab rats...
wearing "Mork" suspenders
and 10-gallon hats
made from Spam
'N' cheese tenders...
Yet Lester1/2jr. wasn't....
wearing any socks
or chastity belts
But his masculine.....
Irish Wolf Hound
Could not resist.....
chewing on his ...
turds which tasted
had been washed
with cooking oil...
and rolled in
...laxative laced chocolate...
Which was bottled......
by old ladies
with bad eyesight ...
wearing flip flops
Generously provided by.....
The Devil's apprentice....
Whose business dealings....
kept b-movie lovers....
from taking over
The Solar System......
in 1902, when...
dirty gutter whores
Started epidemics in......
New New York.....
Which depleted supplies....
of Manos DVd's....
Available to cheerleaders.......
and Polish cowboys
Whose saddles helped....
the Lone Ranger ...
Evade marauding tribes.....
led by JJ80....
Whose hostile motives.....
included skinning dachsunds..
While their owners....
did a jig..
On hot coles.....
While singing Blondie
after dropping acid
into their pants
. They said "ouch"
and quickly disrobed
displaying their elaborately ...
scarred and mutilated
Junior Samples tattoo
carved with a..
dull potato peeler ...
By Irish farmers....
and The Undertaker
Who misplaced corpses......
which were found..
In the canal......
holding puke buckets..
for Merle Haggard
Fans who witnessed.....
Mr. Haggard stripping
Before diving into......
a Crisco vat
of acid, burning...
off his privates
but his buttocks....
Remained resilient until....
eroded by farts
Caused by sampling.....
Popcorn Suttons moonshine
Containing toxic levels.......
of ape feces
Teeming with bacteria......
named after JJ80's
Harem of ballerinas......
that looked liked
Jim J. Bullock
on good days
But then Andrew......!!
took out a
old manky t-shirt
and asked his
Colleagues to silently.......
dance in a...
vat of pudding
while sniffing glue
and pooping Clorox
While singing satanic.....
Sesame Street opening...
and patriotic Nazi..
teddy bears for....
Care Bears to
p**s off retrorussell...
who was digging
graves for them
wearing a gorilla-suit.....
and tight fitting
studded thong underwear
To hasten completion....
of plastic thingies
Which caused environmentalists.....
to burn trees
while they chanted........
the lyrics to
Captain Planet's theme.....
and bathed in..
Rancid hot sauce.....
brewed from badger's
Blood after hounds.....
played poker for....
a fire hydrant
Which frat boys.....
had a panty-raid...
Alarming football players.....
to wear them...
During kicking practice.....
at Girl's gone...
Wild's latest visit.....
to Scotland's theatre
Where relieved fishermen.....
drank Dos Equis...
And wore kilts.....
while singing "Roxanne".....
and peed on..
the KKK and....
Extinguished their burning.....
loins with lavish...
society ranks of....
Successful extinguisher salesmen......
walking their pigs
Past bacon slicers.....
and into compactors
Supplied by vegetarian.....
own Killer Bees....
Which swarmed menacingly......
around Ireland's lighthouse...
Which confused Gorgo .......
to find beer.....
In undersea caverns.....
where I live.
Mysterious air pockets....
dot com has....
Never found evidence.....
of cheaper prices!
Expensive raw materials.......
or Carbon, liquefied....
Could not provide.....
adequate body wash
to clean this
movie lover's privates
which were infected
by Ro-Man's Bubble
Yum, poison flavored.
After the coroner.....
pronounced retrorussell's pet
Undead after exposure.....
to his sweatsocks
Which aliens coveted......
for contraceptives oddly
Preventing excessive growth......
of their gelatinous
Bodies which absorbed.......
nutrients such as
Calcium despite lacking....
a skeletal structure
Or solid limbs.....
So earth decided
To use salt.....
on their fries
Hoping that thirst......
might soon overcome..
Their inhibitions against.....
male pattern baldness
Bankrupting toupee makers......
, styrofoam head makers
And beret manufacturers.
JJ80 expressed concern
with the excessive...
Criticism of moderate.....
ice cream storms....
Which paralysed communications....
and devoured many...
Custard loving citizens......
notably JJ80, Bull....
Decided to intervene.....
the Nazi's plan....
To invade neutral....
and shift to....
Top gear after.....
he saw a...
nun walking across..
a loose tightrope
on her hands
The Pope said, "....
"It's a miracle!"
"He doesn't see
the two midgets...
Break dancing on......
a dining table
Once owned by......
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
and her poodle ...
Mr. Poopy Butt
who ate beans
and Ex Lax
How is this...?"
He slapped his
own rear end
With genuine force.....
before crying, "Ouch!"
Then an Altar boy...
Began to sing.....
Karma Chameleon loudly
to metal fans.......
who threw sharp
Objects with precision.....
non-hurtful knifes at.....
Zealous, opinionated opponents.......
who worshiped John
Steinbeck's vision of.......
there's a Train!.....
Signalmen watched closely......
by JJ80's dog.....
Which protected railroads.....
in the ocean
From metal fatigue......
and giant squids
sunbathing onshore with
Kurt Cobain's corpse
while Courtney Love
Sought ageing rockstars.......
for her daily
pedophiliac touch of...
King "Necrophiliac" Bob....
and his sidekick...
The Darksider Jr.
Meanwhile in Egypt...
President Mubarak violated...
a sacred rite
eating a cupcake....
Baked by Nefertiti.....
and Bull as...
a sacrifice to
Hopelessly sycophantic scribes......
red lionfishes and...
Very hungry crocodiles....
huntresses, who wept....
When suffering decapitated.....
zombie heads for....
christmas ornaments on
Transylvanian castles owned......
by migrating pigeons
Whose droppings covered.....
statues of JJ80
Erected by grateful......
members of PETA
After I rescued......
them from butchers
Whose justifiable vengeance....
caused cattle to
Stampede over cliffs.....
which pleased lemmings
Whose kamikaze reputation.....
arrested them, assaulting....
Steven Seagal's imitators......
led by JJ80....
and Darth Lester1/2jr.
How could a
small hairless chihuahua ...
cause such destruction
To computer networks....
asked Lester. Then...
A power failure.....
at Andrew's house...
Causing many reviews.....
was tripped by...
Hackers searching for....
things that Trevor...
washed with poo.....
To deter anyone.....
from sniffing them
for chocolate candy.
ChrisM then ate...
Several innocent bystanders......
with Sasquatch's approval......
Because protein is.....
necessary for watching....
Mothmen warn of......
TV series cancellations
That prompted gamblers.....
to risk body
Parts in pursuit.....
of tighter shoes
for sitting down.....
on faulty powerlines
Causing shocking revelations......
to local Muslims
That causing offence.....
to shop lingerie....
Cannot quite justify.....
legal street racing,......
in strip malls
at noon. Moo.....
Cows grazed quietly.....
on gay fish.....
while dyslectic goats
omen eht eta ( :wink:)
Near par carks......
in the Himalayas
While breakdancing to..
Sacred Buddhist chants....
on 8-track cassettes
While levitating sherpas....
flew widly into
Sheer cliffs then....
fell into acidic.....
but drinkable water
Which thirsty yaks.....
urinated frequently into
Forcing dehydrated yetis.....
to seek Sprite
Beneath glaciers above.....
Pluto's cousin, McCloud......
(Dennis Weaver's offspring)...
who hated A.J.,...
for being awesome...
at modeling underware
That Trevor hoped......
woulda been panties....
That didn't need.....
silky panty girdle
To display maximum....
coverage of Scotland.....
In Hollywood movies......
made in China.
Uncontrolled access to....
to beer and
Terrible sitcoms caused....
narrators to stutter
Through important details......
about the audience
Of 'blue' movies.....
who really wanted
To watch "Teletubbies"......
Gone Wild, G-rated....
But containing subliminal.......
hidden phallic imagery..
on their teletubes
but Darth Lester1/2jr....
said HELL NOOO.....
to mayonnaise with
Their chicken curry......
Baked into pierogies
For sale in......
Bangkok, Thailand, for.....
Tourists who craved....
$1.99 free refills......
Of any soda....
flavored cheesy popcorn....
In cinemas showing.....
George Kennedy movies...
To captive audiences.....
in dear boredom
At special effects.....
done with matchsticks
And toilet paper.....
. Dreamworks adapted it
As a vehicle......
for their latest
Computer generated celebrity......
infested kid's movie
About contaminated penguins......
living in aquariums
That Colonel Sanders.....
endlessly entertains by...
Impersonating Foghorn Leghorn.....
and Ed Sullivan...
imitated chicken hawks
Whose threats contained.....
loaded assault rifles
that shot pig...
snot out of
large barrels in...
a vampires house
..and he reacted..
by drinking blood.
On Tuesday morning..
he woke up
with a hangover
From hell and.....
a full bladder
from drinking the
Last remaining bottle.....
of Old English
Cider which tasted....
like urine because.....
rats peed in
his rusty oven...
which caused radiation....
infected cabbages to...
grow Killer Tomatoes....
But Italian chefs.......
worshiped JJ80 as.....
The sausage king
Who used haggis,,,,,
mixed with nitroglycerine
To prevent football.....
tailgating parties from..
Causing traffic chaos.....
in Los Angeles....
Unless earth tremors......
ripped California apart
to swallow Chuck.....
Norris whole allowing.....
giant green monkeys
To practice karate.......
on young children.
Bananas, Bananas, Bananas!
They are even
better when eaten
with chicken burritos.
Pull the string
and they fart
it's quite amazing.
Meanwhile, Chuck Norris ...
Met his match.....
at making up
with Dolly Parton
Very rude poems.....
are awesome for
porn and sex!
Not everyone agreed.....
on drunk fighting....
With belligerent gorillas.....
and Gorgo's baby.....
Which soundly crushed......
jars of jelly
Then charged through....
five credit cards
stolen from Andrew...
on his birthday ...
made him sad...
because he wanted..
to drink beer...
using his Visa
To pay compensation......
for extensive damage
His experimental use....
of eating ears
Caused after objections......
made him crazy! :hot:
Meanwhile on Facebook
Few noticed glitches......
in Farmville crops
Which spawned mutant.....
friend requests for
Monster movie fans.....
yearning to have
The strength of......
Tor Johnson's left
Hook honed in.....
fighting off Yaks
Who escaped from....
San Jose, California.....
And eventually appeared......
in sexploitation films
shooting Bieber to....
Many tiny pieces.....
and Hannah Montana...
Turned her attentions.....
to her lack
Of options about.....
birth control pills
An unfortunate oversight.....
is that they
hate old obese...
hosts of "The View".
(Sorry, that was 4...)
with bad facelifts ...
and body oder.
But who were
Joyce DeWitt fans...
Until they witnessed......
Joyce DeWitt killing....
baby sea otters
with a rusty...
hard taco shells.
They were filled...
with disgust by
Gigantic mucus dispensing........
milk jugs to..
burn seal flesh...
Deterring polar bears.....
from humping statues
Of extinct prehistoric.....
lizards, flies, and
ymirs. Bob the...
Plumber attacked Joe...
the town drunk...
After Muammar al-Gaddafi...
bit his ear ...
"Libya will always...!"
roll in feces
Until genuine change.....
comes to Frogtown
Where free elections......
are conducted by..
radioactive dinosaurs wearing....
pink striped tutus..
and will wear
tight Borat swimsuits
!" said Muammar.
whilst he played
Chess with Mubarak...
on page 500
of "A NEVERENDING STORY....."
someone sneezed loudly
causing page 500...
to get snotty
so Former President....
Cleveland was resurrected..
then he danced!
Everyone applauded loudly..
when he stopped.
Meanwhile his understudy....
A.J. Bauer destroyed...
An incoming asteroid....
with a lazer...
from Lazer Tag
that he modified...
....FIVE HUNDRED PAGES...
:cheers: :drink: :twirl:
of pure genius
but Justin Bieber
had sex with
a dead goat
with humongous boobs
each named after
The Khan family.
Guitar Hero sales...
Skyrocketed falling down....
when gamers experienced..
hot flashes, but
they were saved
By concerned geeks.....
who threw milk...
at real instruments
But were electrocuted.....
..for ignoring the fact that liquids and electricity don't mix.
Allowing insurance companies......
to smoke cigars...
laced with kerosene
Incinerating all paperwork.....
involving algebraic equations..
Calculating risks associated.......
with drinking pee
In dubious nightclubs.....
with R. Kelly
And sitcom stars.....
who snort bleach
And sip detergent.....
while rolling in..
pigs blood. Fun
times they were
twas truely spectacular
especially since they..
had no arms
or legs, or...
gray poupon mustard.
But they managed...
to spit gum
and kick the
ass from Scotland.....
named "Jim Gaffigan".
He was known...
To aid tyrannical......
ants that kill
satyrs and pumpkins.....
Causing famines in......
Io and Europa...
For displaced Martians.......
from planet Melmac
Whose earliest contact.......
was John Travolta
Who immediately informed......
Idaho. The transvestite.....
Witch doctor of.....
Transylvania, Transsexual seduced....
Susan Sarandon for....
some pocket change
And information about......
making pies, cakes.....
And danish pastries......
using only items
from trash bins
Near pet shops.....
where the puppies ate . . .
macaroni and cheeze ...
After being converted.....
to Islam by...
Radical clerics from....
Suicide Bombing School...
located in North
Micronesia's palm trees
. Peter, Paul and...
George and Ringo
vacationed in Peru
they ate poop
and declared, "Delicious!",
Yet it didn't...
ring true to
Ninja Gaiden pros...
stuck on level
by crazy glue
who believed that..
cheese speaks to..
Other dairy products......
in ancient Sumatran
Dialects only understood.....
by bipedal humanoids...
Whose culture prohibited.....
the milking of...
Any animals due......
their eating of....
rusty tin cans ...
And discarded plastic.....
bottles. It's sickening.
Attempts to develop.....
film in the.....
High school's lab....
are futile as
No teacher could.....
clean puke off..
The floor after....
an immense kegger
had occurred Tuesday..
where vomit was
copiously ejected everywhere
after seeing Trevor...
slowly removing his
Underpants to deter.......
JJ80 from looking...
at Mona Lisa...
with lustful glances
Or any discerning.....
Erotic porn whales.
Dolphins flirted with.....
Dan Marino's butt
But quickly retreated......
when he farted
Causing tidal waves.....
and brown fog
Hindered all attempts......
to breathe air
That remained uncontaminated......
from the smell.
Fresh air finally.....
ceased to exist
Forcing mankind to.......
to live underwater
and eat seahorses
with sides of
severed mermaid heads
and severed tenticles
from mutated crustaceans...
dipped in ketchup
and spicy mustard.
Don't forget the...
salt and pepper!
Meanwhile, somebody violated...
Hornswoggle's backside. Repeatedly.
The police found
blood, sweat, and
Tears' Al Kooper..
Wandering aimlessly near,,,,,
a dead body
Dumped by mysterious.....
cloaked hooded figures...
Whose clandestine rituals.....
involved bull semen
and Torgo's feces...
liberally slathered on..
The Master. He
picks on Torgo
for his music...
his haunting theme
, and his habit
of limping. MST3K...
made Torgo limp
inflating knee caps...
explode! The Master...
Laughed at Torgo...
and grabbed his
knees and bit
off his face...
As cackling brides.....
roasted his hands...
While crushing his.....
arms and spirit
via rusty tailpipe
Torgo cried. The
painting was being...
peed upon. Stinky
p**s odors rose....
People vomited. Children
screamed and ran
into a wall.
Meanwhile Andrew banned...
himself from the
local bar's restroom
the smell there
was enough to make a hobo see stars. Fortunately, the maitre d'
pulled the string
tied to Ed
and he giggled
rather loudly. It
was one of those moments that made you
p**s yourself in
Public without fear......
of being ostracized.
Echoes of former......
members of Menard's...
are heard at
Various addresses in.....
Atlantis, where much
fornication had happened..
to DarkSider's posts
by horny barnacles
living on anchors
and oxygen tanks
recovered from Lemuria...
they are enchanted
to zombie gorillas.....
who screw spiderwebs
into light bulb...
Factories causing shortages.....
of A.J. Bauer's Liquor...
which makes A.J.
RAGE! So Trevor...
with his knowledge..
Of the archives.....
of poo stains
On used underpants......
ran to Andrew's...
stockpile of underwear ...
To find alternative.....
garter belts and
whips and chains...
for leisure wear
During assignations with.....
evil dragons that
hated malt liquor...
yet like thongs
that are stained
By repeated misuse.....
of greasy nachos...
and Ex Lax
To slow the......
rapid firing of
dysentery infected chunks
from Oregon Trail...
from making the
Black Legions angry...
do to the
Darksider's evil biding...
Without any complaint.....
from mutant grasshoppers ...
Whose natural habitat......
is juggling jello
To maintain balance.....
in the Earth
by creating some
exploding chess pieces.
Fruit bats fornicated..
inside of caves
where Menard keeps...
an evil twin
in chains and
being poked with
A red hot......
rubber strap on
fleshing eating tool
his name is...
Bond, James Bond . . .
Leader of the
Tra La Logs
who train mice
by bludgeoning them
with giant pickled...
herring filled with
cheese like substances.
Bond hated Menard...
for his tiny
flies as they
Contaminated his buffet......
with British influence.....
Bond attacked Menard...
with his spit
Menard fought back...
With karate kicks.....
and double entendres...
Which deflated egos.......
Bond's ego was...
Utterly unshaken until......
it was stirred
By a bartender......
with a machete
named Moe Szyslak.
Homer and Barney.....
worship his boos
Even sacrificing their.....
eyes, ears, and
Last few remaining.....
Cocoa Pebbles boxes.
In Tuesday's news..
onions help dogs
Digestive systems cope.....
after taking a
mile long s**t
which hurts them.
Then Super Monkey...
Geniuses from outer
Mongolia pitched tents.....
into the ground
waiting for Torgo...
to approve for
the strangulation of...
The Master. His
Unfortunate habit of....
feeding ducks is
Seen as encouraging......
as it is
Allowing overpopulation to......
slowly die due
to Soylent Green...
made from PEEEEOOOOOOPPPPPLLLLEEEEEEE~!!
not to mention
that stupid old...
Willy Wonka remake...
that endorsed cruel...
and evil tentacles
to invade Japanese
mice using their
high powered beam
of light from
their thrusting crotches
which is massive
and very thick...
but nobody really cared because Mr Fibble said
"pull the string!"
so Bela Lugosi...
did in fact
become their puppeteer...
He made millions
From shrewd investments.....
in angora sweaters
and fluorescent condoms
and autograph signings
By former basketball......
player Kareem Abdul-....
Jabber who refused.....
to pet chihuahuas
with green teeth
from chewing through...
rotting camel flesh
. Very nutritious stuff...
if you're a
complete psychopathic invertabrate
not that there's
such a thing...
as tasty horses
...made out of chocolate and cabbage.
Quote from: A_Dubya on March 14, 2011, 10:05:21 AM
...made out of chocolate and cabbage.
[Try to limit yourself to 3 words.]But Alan Rickman...
begs to differ
about the three
evil ones as
their names are...
Often accidentally invoked......
instead of those
butterfly demon warriors...
Whose insidious motives.....
include throwing cats,
Poisoning petulant parrots........
and Andrew's keyboard.
Local police discovered..
the Dark Lord.......
Ronald MacDonald had...
a sex change
becoming Rhonda McDonald
so she can...
Quote from: A.J. Bauer on March 14, 2011, 10:14:03 AM
Quote from: A_Dubya on March 14, 2011, 10:05:21 AM
...made out of chocolate and cabbage.
[Try to limit yourself to 3 words.]
But Alan Rickman...
I can't count
play with Grimmace (sp?)
In a sexual...
manner. Grimmace (sp?) is
always misspelled by
dyslexic invalid parakeets
and talking dogs
Named Bob and.....
Brian Wilson's babysitter...
who married Hamburglar
while Birdie conquered
the Hamburgler's country...
with Mr. Snuffleupagus...
Emerged from hibernation........
and prompty ate
A year's supply.....
of cookies making
the lack of
milk rather depressing
For school children.......
in their 30s
Whose basic knowledge......
of mouse traps
Prevented any infestations......
of Disney mascots
At Universal Studios.....
cartoon theme rides
Which were haunted.....
by murdered interns
Whose shady employers....
snorted Pixie Stix
with a straw.
Any unexplained transactions.....
were slowly resolved
after a dorito
said, "B*tches leave!"
and they left.
But not without...
pooping on statues
of Fred Flinstone.
Pregnant Wilma screamed
"My water is...!!"
turning into acid!!"...
Meanwhile, Dino humped
Barney, he liked
Cocoa Pebbles Cereal...
covered in cats
dander. This amazing
Coincidence caused psychiatrists....
to drink acid
Rain collected from......
puddles in the
Streets of South.....
African towns. Trevor...
Avoided the need.....
to change underwear...
everyday because he
Felt strangely comfortable......
in his filth...
Until he encountered.....
a massive hemorrhoid
He named it
After his favourite......
muppet thus named
Gonzo the not...
Hunter S. Thompson
the third, because
that'd be silly
Not everyone was....
into Gwar so...
Menard set fire...
to a dog
Which jumped out.....
of a building
Into a wet...
And very slippery.......
yet strangely rubbery
supermodel wearing flimsy
the aptly named
'No imagination required'.....
Uhh... We goofed. The grammar is wrong now...
Quote from: A.J. Bauer on March 17, 2011, 01:15:50 PM
Uhh... We goofed. The grammar is wrong now...
It happens.
not a single.....
Error was missed.....
but we still...
Forgot to mention.....
how much pizza...
was crapped on
By vicious pranksters.......
because they mistook
it for Bieber
Whose musical career......
was a conspiracy
By hyperactive psychologists.....
eating too much
Sugared breakfast cereal.......
with a straw
After excessive quantities......
of pubic lice
Ruined breakfast for.....
neighboring ladybugs within
Derelict apartment blocks......
Which Bond used...
For surveillance missions...
with fairy leprechauns...
Whose sixth sense.....
was finding gold
in gangstas' teeth
but Menard saw...
Smurfs pulling ears
So he loaded...
his squirt gun
and squirted Bond...
with pink glitter
Bond returned fire...
and burped into
a giant megaphone
the entire alphabet
except for the letter K because
he couldn't say
three words only
"Ku Klux Klan"...
suddenly a fist
...struck Trevor in...
the back of
a big girl's booty
reaffirming the observation
that it is
ZOMBIE BUDDHISTS NINJAS!
They scare easy
because of phobias....
to jelly, fish
and jelly fish.
Angus Young asked,
are clownk kniky?
no, they're kinky.....
but a bomb
blew them up
into a million
flying flaming remnants
and Obama said
"pull the string"
on talking dolls
that wear lipstick
and say "Meep!"...
or NI as.......
Soon as anyone.....
ate some chicken
Pie baked by.....
Batman and Robin
On a spit
on pen island...
To feed hungry.....
alien spawned turtles...
they started to
assimilate Trevor's undies...
To collect bacteria......
to use for
biological warfare against...
Mr. Potato Head.
and his friend...
betrayed him by
revealing his identity
to Menard who...
Laughed with insane.......
joy at the
Confirmation of theories.....
on how to
skin a potato...
with wooden spoons...
purchased from eBay
By discerning collectors........
of crack paraphernalia
with free shipping
and handling charges
For regular clients.....
Bond stalked Menard...
Unable to resist....
the temptation of
His culinary skills....
with rapid squid
over rice pilaf
and a side
Order of ketchup....
and onion rings.
with no pickles...
Or salad because.....
it's already tossed
it's own lunch.
The resulting mess....
was actually decent...
If properly cooked......
with rusted scissors...
and some blood
of squished bugs...
it makes vomit
that corrodes stone...
and tastes salty...
yet strangely lemony
Bond asked Menard...
Where ya goin'?
He said "To
the land of...
Confusion, with Genesis..
to play football
with John Madden
and his little
buddy, Trevor." So
they dyed their
pubes bright orange
To attract cloned....
Carrot Tops who...
resemble creepy women...
so they can...
do the can-can...
standing on cans
and rub their
weiners on sandpaper
in hopes of
starting a fire
in the mouth
Of Steven Tyler
, the last descendant
nymphomaniacs of Egypt
Who ensured the......
warlocks, wizards and
Dragons didn't threaten......
to strip naked
Despite traditionally never.....
fully embracing nudity
As they preferred.....
pink thongs as
Protection against knights......
the pygmies of...
The Congo thanked......
Charles Nelson Reilly
for his yellow
Big Bird suit
Which distracted rival.....
kid show hosts
Who furtively copied.....
Captain Kangaroo's outfit
To impress Australian......
warmongers invading South
Sea islands to.......
acquire pretty seashells
To trade for......
fingernail clippings of
Extinct prehistoric primates......
who lived meagerly
In sweltering forests......
covered with snow
And dust particles......
from antique stores
Specializing in books.....
on animal porn
In ancient civilizations.....
such books are
really, really hot
to the touch...
so wear asbestos
and clean undies
(but not Trevor's)
as they are
currently on Trevor.
A mummy ate
two pieces of
Stale sponge cake.....
and then screamed,
"Where's my custard!"........
Brendan Fraser said,
As a scorpion......
stung his anus,
Causing some panic......
resulting in massive
poisonous fecal logs
coming out rapidly
into a blender
for Torgo to
throw into the
mixture some paprika..
hoping to please...
The Master's dog
but the Poodle...
at them and
bought a car...
with no downpayment
but with fuzzy
dice dangling from
the muffler pipe...
amongst the marshmallows
but Madonna yelled
"That's f***ing strange,"
then she farted.
Her male dancers
Strangled her. Menard...
sprayed some Febreeze
magically out came
The tooth fairy....
with a mohawk!
And an enormous...
Supply of amazing.....
pile of paper
To scribble reminders......
for go-go dancers...
to stop eating
Fried chicken before......
torturing evil flowers
Whose poisonous pollen......
gave people AIDS...
causing apes to
sing about cookies
that Menard baked...
To sell to.....
singing goldish named
bob. Bob was
bound and gagged
Then driven to.....
the black hole...
Which had swallowed....
some parakeet poop
And become contaminated......
with anti-matter particles...
Which reacted with.....
cheerleaders pom poms ...
To form galaxies......
shaped like breasts...
with candy nipples...
and cream filled
ears, the wax
flowing like wine
and as colorful
as clown makeup
Began to solidify......
into temples because
The Druids demanded.......
that eagles fly
to forbidden lands...
to construct nests ...
To house expanding.......
Sly Cooper franchise.....
that are actually
making Carmelita the.....
Most popular name.....
in JJ80's diary!
Who the hell
Allowed access to.....
the Presidential porn
which led corruption.....
in the Southern...
parts of Russia
where sheep dance
in skimpy underwear
and green berets...
made of popcorn.
"Avast, ye landlubber . . . "
Cried the Captain.......
after shooting his
pen, but suddenly
An immense octopus......
starts signing to
Any nearby submarine.......
to ride a....
New underwater trail......
led by french...
ticklers painted blue.
A gaping abyss.....
directed by James
Whale unravelled mightily...
And totally absorbed.....
ancient, invalid moviegoers..
Who disliked gratuitous.....
chicken-fried steak eating..
During ballet recitals......
performed by sumo...
Wrestlers whose agility......
was rather questionable
But proved sufficient.....
when dodging turds
Thrown by elitist.....
samuri fighting fish
at Bob Saget.....
who get blooded
and man-handled
who then cried
but danced naked
and recited the...
. . . Book of Revelations . . .
in pig Latin!
Meanwhile, Farley Granger . . .
asked, "Who am
I now that.....
I've been turned
into a dead
one armed penguin?
The unpredictable process.......
of sleeping naked
On major highways......
while sexually aroused
By oddly shaped......
Houston armadillo schlongs
Which reminded them.....
of Picasso paintings
Depicting unusually smooth.....
silkiness like a
Shimmering curtain between......
towels and ghosts
Of deposed emperors......
who farted noisily
in the face
of their servants.
" The acid had
Corroded directly through.......
the apartment floor...
Infuriating swarming cockroaches.......
in Trevor's underpants
Who desired peaceful.....
bowel movements because
Their main source.......
of agony was
Pesticides sprayed by.....
killer robots from
the negative zone...
Within the city......
in the woods
next to the
dumpster. Hansel asked
Gretel what she ...
threw up yesterday
After meeting a........
clone of RuPaul
she said fish
Won't swim into......
a smelly cesspool
Full of dissolving.....
Charlie Sheen pee
and Dolly Parton's ...
Very carelessly spilled................
the password: swordfish.....
To Russian agents,.....
is the same
As the French.....
word for alcohol
"Stop!" said the
World Alcohol Association...
as they objected
to the peeing
of tall dolphins
In barrels of....
shotguns. "We need
lobster to sacrifice
Billy Green Bush
for Elmo because
he wasn't tickled
with love, but
with sexual interest
in Giant Squids ...
who were menstruating
With real vigour.....
that would make...
Anyone present try......
to use straws
to stab out
hairy bugs inside
their swollen rectums
and tasted awful
To Sabretooth Tigers......
and evil vampires
who leapt from
A black helicopter......
onto a trampoline
And violently grabbed.....
sticky used condoms
To prevent the .....
flow of STD
into Tommy Wiseau
Fans who gathered......
at Staples Center
to celebrate the
L.A. Clippers' suckiness
"You're tearing me...!"
apart Blake Griffin."
Ashley Judd interjected
To which Bond....
Aimed his pistol.......
at the moon
Showing the futility....
of killing idiots
Who simply regenerate.......
like the T-1000
only with tacos
being their shape.
Each individual crumb......
transformed into retarded...
glittery vampire with
Scooby Doo undies
but Dolly Parton
boobs on his
left butt cheek
made Menard squeeze...
his eyes with
fat hairy hands
"I told you..."
said Adolf Hitler
the French are
Pretty horny b*stards
that lick skunks
rears." "What happened...
to my Oreos?"
Kiba took them.
Menard raged. "f**king...!!"
Mice never cease.....
to make pancakes ...
out of ovaries
Provided by illegal.......
killer tomateos from
Space!" he shouted.
Mounds of pulsating.......
stool blood emerged
from Liberace's anus
and was pink
and purple striped
and had horns
and slide trombones
Bond shot Menard...
in the butt
Menard struck back...
by throwing ears
he ripped off
my smelly butt
Quote from: A.J. Bauer on April 07, 2011, 12:30:01 PM
Menard struck back...
Not to derail this thread but your fixation with Menard strikes me as rather ... odd :buggedout:
and stuffed them
Quote from: claws on April 07, 2011, 02:04:52 PM
Quote from: A.J. Bauer on April 07, 2011, 12:30:01 PM
Menard struck back...
Not to derail this thread but your fixation with Menard strikes me as rather ... odd :buggedout:
and stuffed them
I'm using "Menard" and "Bond" as recurring characters. I would be the same were it Trevor or Circus.
in his mouth.
He then farted...
and ate it
in a messy...
fashion and then
screamed at Andrew.
Andrew shouted back,
and threw dead
chickens at him
"You're banned!" Andrew....
said after crying
Over Menard's post....
claiming SEXTETTE was
the horse he
notoriously raped yesterday.
But Andrew knew...
the true identity
of the disgusting
horse. It was...!
Mr. Ed's wife.
The members fainted...
Circus shouted, "Menard...!"
after slipping waffles
down his pants... :buggedout:
that had syrup
in his pockets...
"God damn it..."
said the Pope
so God damned...
his jock strap
and took his
little red corvette
and turned it
into a Pinto
filled with dolphins
that crashed into
a talking moose
that could talk
every bit as
well as Splinter
the ninja rat
only he sniffed
the wrong end
of Trevor's underpants...
that were stretched
like rubber bands ...
with skid marks
full of corn
which was fried
at the island
of Dr.Moreau
where they experimented
with anal beads :buggedout:
to gain understanding
of how dragons
do their taxes
using their tails.
Meanwhile, back at
slaughter house, Igor
sent letters to..
nude Santa Claus :bouncegiggle:
omitting important articles
about juggling pandas
and championship bowling...
and jello creations
shaped like phalluses
with festering abrasions.
The Human Centipede...
connected by their
Lifelong appreciation for.......
milk and cookies
Served by attractive.......
Elf girls, decided...
to dance, but
Their exhausted partners......
died. Circus Circus...
threw birds at
the dead, because
Their feathers agitated.......
his nose hairs
Of hired assassins.....
Therefore, someone killed....
A leading anarchist.......
named Moe Howard
Who punched anyone......
who liked flowers
And teddy bears......
and rainbows and
Spoonfulls of sugar......
that nuked Neptune....
into next week.
Enormous fragments of.....
radioactive sprockets had
Already collided with.....
zombie Chevy Chase
Whose latest vacation.....
involved toxic waste
and termites swarming ...
To devour antique.....
Frank Sinatra records.
Tony Bennett's fans......
rang a bell
because of fallout....
from the exploding
robodinosaurs eating grass....
from the lawn
Outside Stephen Spielburg's.....
Peterbilt 289 tanker*
(It's the Duel Truck :teddyr:)
exploded into sandwiches...
which hippos ate
with letter openers
and chickens pantsing....
while camels humped
Andrew. He banned...
their massive members
From posting videos......
of haunting ghosts
without paying royalties
To Bill Gates......
mother, Nora Gates.
The copyright belonged......
to Senor JJ80....
Who ruthlessly protected.....
The Milk man....
From marauding kittens.....
which raped worms....
Then ate discarded......
rancid mouse poop
To aid digestion......
beer was drank
by A.J. Bauer...
who then jumped
and acted goofy...
first he molested
a microwaved hamster
then a whale
followed by an
owl. Condoms were
filled with mayonnaise
and dead Gumby.
"Yikes!" said the
Pope. "Bauer is..."
the devil, he
Breathes fire and......
pulls the string
On possessed puppets.....
Bauer laughed. "Fools...!"
Will never learn.....
"opposing me is..."
"like killing Garfield"
I've got eight...
tentacles. They are
busy phoning foreign...
Embassies making threats.....
to bomb underwear...
which was soiled
By careless hippies.......
with overactive bowels
"Damn stinky poo!"...
Said Bob Dylan.....
who had arrived
To investigate reports......
of unexplained yodeling ...
In South Dakota......
from dead frogs
impregnated by aliens
that create dominos...
To convince alcoholic......
that radioactive sugar....
could cure cravings......
chocolate covered tarantulas.
Dexy's Midnight Runners......
fished with clay
bait for trout
swimming into sewers....
which were slimy
with shark diarrhea
which was red
yet blue. But...!
his eyes mutated
Giving him enhanced.......
vision to see
Through the facade......
and through clothing
Bauer was confused...
By feminist interpretations.....
of his tentacles...
Provided by ancient......
Tentacle porn enthusiasts...
Whose demented rituals.....
involved placing sausages
Beyond the reach.....
of "normal people"
Without sufficient desire.....
to kill bees
and swat strange...
Wasps whose sting.....
induced extreme horniness
of JJ80's dog.....
Which chewed carpets.....
laced with Viagra....
Making him unstoppable.....
leg humping machine...
Whose territory eventually......
spread to Antarctica ...
But became infested.....
with yelping flies
Which terrorized cattle......
while in their
Fields full of....
rancid horse poop
Which attracted complaints......
from talking dogs
Brian Griffin, and
the charasmatic Snoopy
and Curious George...
not the Monkey...
but a bat
s**t insane Dog.
named Dog. Dog
sniffed Brian's ass...
trying to determine
if ghosts exist
in Albanian huts.
Brian got p**sed...
and peed on
JJ90's face. "Mother...!"
Goose is who
he fantasized about
while on the
Titanic when the....
mice tapped danced
off the deck
into the water.
Bobby Fisher spewed..
while eating heads
from zombie raccoons....
while they passed
through his gastrointestinal
rainbow sugardrop tubing
while being silky
sleek and slippery...
And rather alluring.....
, Bob could not
Find sufficient affection.....
for his balls
To play pool.....
with the shaven
Headed misfit known......
as Tiny Trevor
who ate spiders
while having sex......
with Jennifer Lopez
and Kirstie Alley...
and Pauly Shore
who married me.
At the reception.,.....
fights broke out
between Andrew and...
Mike Tyson who
wasn't invited but
knocked me out
For several hours.....
"You okay, Bob?"
"Doggies plant flowers...
and crap diamonds....
while peeing gold
dracula milk toast
and fart garlic."
Lady Gaga sang
with Cat Butt
to Mickey Mouse
Who fled screaming.....
into spiked doors....
and then jumped......
into Dracula's lap....
Terrifying the vampire......
who's Frankenstein's b***h!
They drank blood
Stolen from clinics......
mixed with martinis....
and ate cupcakes
drenched in sewage...
and toxic waste...
That no scientist.....
could inject into
bipolar dancing superheroes...
Whose dangerous careers......
caused supervillains to
continually wet themselves
after dog sitting
anthropomorphic Dog people...
which bit them
Infecting them with.....
Martin Short, who
that talking condoms
Could entice ladies.....
into downhill races
Against Olympic standard......
practice, instead competing
Without skis or......
those stick things.
Clocks that eat
Fingers were placed.....
on glove walls
Lost by elderly......
and young cowboys
during the annual
World Rodeo Championships......
in El Paso
Where impressionable wranglers.....
wore stylish jeans
And huge stetsons......
that were also
Sitting targets for.....
mutant bull men
Who resented matadors......
due to their
Adherence to traditional.....
Spanish urological customs
Doug the Slug...
Entered the garden....
and a moth
Flew close to.....
JJ80's Gold RV
And was swatted.....
on its genitalia
By traffic cops.....
sporting silly mustaches
And large handguns.....
that shot water
To combat burning.....
cacti, that are
Filled with dangerous.....
acid spitting ladybugs...
flesh eating worms,
and cotton candy.
Once the fire
spread to cows
the milk became
slightly tepid. Robert
Duvall drank it...
To impress watching......
root beer guzzlers.....
who had taken
Offence to regulations......
of drinking Cola....
At low temperatures......
by the grand
Council of universal.....
of vampire clowns
Whose giant spaceships.....
were shaped like...
Gigantic top hats.....
and are brown
and covered in...
lime green jello!
Duvall was lactose
intolerant and fed
Up with consuming......
pink chips that
shot straight through
A.J. Bauer's window...
and exploded making
cookies. Schwarzenegger flexed
his head and...
his massive third
testicle popped loudly
deafening the nearby
nuns staring at
Billy Gibbons beard
Which was infested.......
with spirochetes and
Fleas which could......
morph into pirates
Irritating Johnny Depp.......
and his fans...
Who brandished cutlasses......
made for midgets ...
Who didn't tolerate......
anyone over 5ft..
or who yelled...
or steals plants
To feed fawns.....
animal body parts....
and pilates DVD's.
Obsessive aerobics fanatics......
cut their nails
with a chainsaw!
One unfortunate error.....
resulted in flying
below the radar
And narrowly avoiding....
the great spotted
Circus Circus. Burning...
fecal matter flew..
into a brewery
where it turned
into a monkey
with corprophilic desires
And no restraint.....
against the impulse
To sing psychedelic.....
covers of polka....
Ditties that Michael......
Bolten frequently gets...
Royalties for despite.....
never showering with...
Soap and water.....
or green squids
Whose cold tentacles.....
feel strangely soothing
And can massage....
angry Sumo wrestlers ...
after eating spicy...
Sausages which irritated.....
their moldy colons
Leading to uncomfortable......
pink bowel movements
In bored waiters....
bowls of soup
which were cold...
from ice cubes
containing razor blades
and silk worms
so they served
raw chicken hearts
with harsh browns
and monkey brains...
into zombie butts
so they would
explode on impact.
Meanwhile, Horst Bucholz . . .
ingested tuning forks
in his hotrod
with his sidekick....
Billy Barty, dressed
as a monk...
-fish with two
enormous, pear-shaped prostates
and lazer eyes...
with radioactive funs
and false teeth
, which turned Horst
into a badger
that has antlers
on its knees
and fins on
its webbed feet...
so it could
morph into dragons
to fight the
scary evil clown
hiding Easter Eggs
in peoples bums.
Why the clown
has no eyes
But could describe......
his victims was
A powerful telepath......
complete with porn...
Which he confiscated.....
from a bird
Who worked for....
Bozo the Clown
, a crime boss...
who threw apples
at Clarabell's anus
during the summer
and laughed at
injured donkeys in
Mexico who spit
tobacco laced with...
traces of arsenic
Into bowls of......
crusty chili sauce....
Which was served....
to diseased orphans...
Who had infected.....
the planet of
Zeist where Immortals
Tried to forget.......
about Christopher Lambert
resurrcting Villa-Lobos RamÃrez
to fight the
undead Family horde...
known as zombie
Buttocks ona stick
with a pineapple
Replacing his head.......
into an eggplant
Which actually increased......
spice production 10.....
Years later due.....
to Spice Girls
Posh and Ginger...
being ground up
into massive hamburgers
I threw up
After witnessing David.......
Hasselhoff wax his
uncircumcised c*ck with..
A toxic substance........
and a hacksaw
To quickly remove....
filthy, unwanted blackheads
Before performing his......
self-fellatio services..
To bored passengers......
for 50 cents
Then offering further.....
services involving ears
and waxy intercourse
fun for everyone!
Hasselhoff fell on
the sexy Smurfette
and impregnated her
With Satan's malignant.....
nazi biker bulldog....
Who sacrificed innocent......
checkout assistants to
The Great Cthulhu....
Whose discounted calamari.....
fed Hasselhoff's spawn
armed with spoons....
That Pamela Anderson......
swallowed whole like...
An infernal being......
that swallows things
Which seem inedible.....
but she did.
Despite chronic indigestion....
he ate jalapenos
after the operation
To repair problematic......
burping every second
Day after inhaling......
helium provided by
Friendly local clowns.....
and a dwarf
Whose dirigible leaked....
gas from its
disturbing third eye....
Which could identify.....
nude people showing
massive, milky nips
as well as
bushy brown beavers... :buggedout:
who make dams
and cover clams
because they pay
Higher taxes than.....
the average bear
Whose accountancy skills.....
are surprisingly good
For such inexperienced......
deranged lunatics. Cool.
Columbus cats want....
Saxophone solos included......
rap videos which
Offended many parents.....
who hated jazz
Finding syncopated rhythms......
to be unclean
for their taste
as opposed to
massive dragon erections
along with pumpkins
towers of bone,
And steel beams...
connecting the erection
into the mouth
of Tom Cruise
statue of SNoopy
fell out onto
A crowd of....
evil sparkly vampires
who were sewing
buttons onto stickers
for a charity
devoted to licking
their warty genitalia
and slimey toads
to gain magical
Cauldrons which create.....
bad rap music
and singing flowers
with severe halitosis
that spit acid
blinding the mighty
and eating the
weak before they
broke massive wind
and rose toward
A hovering spacecraft.....
filled with Kilngons....
and E.T. who
Collected blood samples.....
from Count Dracula
Whose new diet.....
included radioactive milk.....
alligator eyes and
Discarded pizza crusts.......
and plastic straws
Which were dripping......
cows from Mars.....
Whose milk contaminated.......
children's school lunches..
Causing extreme hyperactivity......
and acne spurtings
Which traumatized cheerleaders......
even more than
bowling with heads
of rotten lettuce...
eaten by trolls......
who drool Kool-Aid
On passing goats.......
and angry beavers.
They are coming
to take Burgo
to the cave
of Many Silly
Jugglers who will
feed him kolbasa
Instead of bratwurst.......
or summer sausage
until he chokes
on his shoes...
Which were harder.....
than his d*ck
But less useful.....
than dead flies
in pea soup.
Dancing with dogs
is more fun
when you're drugged
on Andrew's special...
green slime medication
which causes hallucinations...
of hentai octopi
entering bodies of..
horny scarecrows filled
with mashed potatoes
that were taken
Directly from Irish......
disco kings who
Wore green flares.....
and ate rocks
To prevent digestive......
enzymes from fermenting
Their lunchtime fruit......
that they stole
From howler monkeys......
living in Japan.
Hostile atmospheric conditions.....
led to dogs
Developing feline characteristics.....
when mad scientists
tampered with jeans
Worn by rodeo.....
cows and donkeys....
Who could withstand.....
the social jibes
From urban cowboys.....
trained to ride
robotic dinosaurs while.....
Circus dropped dead
But was revived.....
after being laid....
by Pamela Anderson
AND David Hasselhoff......
and KITT too
Whose precision steering.......
landed them in
the Earth's core.....
Where rocks always......
played, by Aerosmith.
Steve Tyler glared......
at his bikini
Which inevitably revealed.....
his nipple rings
and Batman briefs...
to all the
Local Elvis impersonators.....
sat at the
bus stop spitting
On punk rockers.....
until the arrival
of the double
dealing, spine stealing
Lizardgirls from Andromeda......
who had massive
Spaceships which attracted.....
a tapdancing cat
To audition for....
Fred Astaire's corpse
which was kept
in a rickshaw
With Gene Kelly's.....
beautifully mutliated eye
under the wheel
of his rock....
which smelled like
wet animal farts...
And attracted swarms.....
of New Yorkers...
and Spider Man
and Batman, who...
Sought to avenge......
the death of
The crown Prince.....
and his bat-armadillo
named Timmy Tool.
They were killed
by deranged snowmen....
who used pinecones
for toilet paper
thus causing bleeding
and sharp poo
it was painful.
A wicked wizard
licked a bird
and suffered a
Truly appalling headache......
"My f**king head...!"
His then exploded!
Brains splattered across . . .
Six separate states......
onto cow ninjas.....
Whose unique weaponry.......
was sodomizing them
While still killing......
with nuts and
Bolts scavenged from......
radioactive fish monsters...
Inhabiting reactor pools.....
that had lice
with AK-47s. You......
could see Osama's...
body floating in
the air if
You really looked.
Beer and chesse
made me puke.
I then tried.....
to drink gasoline
To fuel my.....
burning love for
Former members of.....
70s group Sweet
Whose enduring legacy......
produced illegitimate children
Whose playful attempts.....
failed miserably beyond....
The level established......
by cocaine snorters
for eating snow
that was yellow
in massive quanities
"Hope is lost..."
interjected my mother
"He's nearing 'Kraken'..."
and eating styrofoam
Ronald MacDonald heads...
that bleed ketchup
taste like hamburgers
and Birdie's diaphragm
it's unique in
An unearthly manner.....
on many levels
Especially the colourful.....
feathered stomach pouch...
which is purple
pink and orange...
with yellow spots
Caused by spilled.....
radioactive French toast
and oatmeal crackers...
mixed with frogs
, lizard tails and...
an eagle eye
... that was found and eaten by a hobo ...
three words per post :smile:
while in drag......
by a pineapple.
"Raisins cause cancer...."
"just like grass"
, said Mr. Rogers
taking off his
white lab coat
And deliberately spilling.....
his alcoholic beer
on Smurfs' heads
To force them.....
to strip naked
and then fart
the macarena tune....
while dancing. But
His uncomfortable shoes......
started speaking to
his comfortable socks
Asking them to.....
refrain from stinking
While the President.....
inserted a tampon
Before jumping into.....
a ball pit
And finding lost.....
skinned platypus ducks
Hidden by wizards.....
who were drunk
on moonshine and
starlight. Because of
An ancient curse......
that trapped them
under styrofoam boulders
Dropped by winged......
tree surgeons from
Villages near Liverpool......
pass the A80.....
Then head north.....
at the pig
Which eternally guards.....
the Animal Netherworld....
with help from
George W. Bush...
and his goat
Lulu the Looter...
and Cookie Monster
could not prevent
A Rapture's cancellation.....
yet a mummy....
decided to make
edible dirty underpants
while Torgo watched...
Bill Cosby porn
While wearing jumpsuits......
and his hat
Which blew away......
and landed in
Bill Cosby's bushes
Horrifying his gardener......
a hobo with...
Four extra arms......
with tiny hands.
Despite growing concerns.....
for Bill's bushes
Which showed signs.......
of rapid mutation!
and hungered for..
the love of
a blowup doll
Which promptly burst.....
when a branch
entered its nethers
thanks to Sam
the fireplace installer
and his cow
who together thrust
with great passion
the branch sideways
enabling the villagers
to enter into
A profitable contract......
with wealthy investors
involving the licking
of chocolate almonds...
By pedigree dogs.......
who then died
Of chronic obesity......
for no reason
Having been abandoned.....
by Colonel Sanders
After flea infestations....
found in coleslaw
Deterred shopkeepers from....
having sidewalk sales
Of fur coats....
with talking fish
that made lots
of glowing glitter...
to use on
page 619, Rey...
threw up blood
and crapped diamonds...
Which were collected....
by dancing chimpanzees...
Who smuggled them....
with Han Solo...
into Mexico, where....
They were traded.....
for some water....
For his mule.....
called the bus.
Numerous angry passengers.......
shouted "Good Luck!".....
As they fled.....
for the aliens....
Experimental laboratory beneath.....
JJ80's house, in.....
a dilapidated part
of the cells....
Of Edinburgh Castle..........
where King Arthur.....
Lost the Grail.....
whilst wearing lingerie......
Which distracted archers......
from killing the...
demented evil monkey
named "Yeknom the..."
Overly sensitive but......
also slightly bicurious..
Enjoying constant experimentation......
monkey," a name
Richly earned in.....
Mongolia, clipping bridges....
when he met...
Rufus T. Firefly.....
who insulted him...
to the point
he became aroused
And charged forward....
amongst a crowd
of drunken elves
that were performing
The Kinks "Misfits"......
and he belched
The entire chorus......
Misfits are everywhere......
Except for Northern.....
South African Trevor....
who is eating
boiled vampire bats
eggs battered with...
delicious rat tails
and large mangos
filled with spiders
eating spicy haggis.....
That burned unwitting......
Woody woodpecker and
griffin tail feathers...
in a bathtub
Filled with custard.....
and whipped cream...
and rubber ducks
who enjoyed b*****e
and censored posts
along with lizards
,wizards eating gizzards...
while playing billiards.
Trevor's spicy meal
with Joan Collins...
ended abruptly when..
Godzilla passed wind
after eating fajitas
at Anguirus's cave...
in northern Iceland......
where I refuse
to hear Pop.....
Goes the Weasel
in R&B form.....
because I have
no tolerance towards....
Boyz II Men
as they violated
my grandfather's corpse
using a yo-yo
She wants ruffnecks...
to play with
Tons of wool.....
but the mammoths....
kept dancing on
The Brains of....
Morgan Freeman's corpse
as Freeman narrated
Andrew's new movie....
which was called
The Squatting Dog
Who jumped across....
the Grand Canyon
But lost momentum......
who then fried
His Brain: The
Underdog Story Part
Trois." Critics were
drinking heavily due
to mass hippie...
smelling like ginger
Whose scent masked......
his frequent diarrhea
Caused by addiction......
to edible underwear
and kangaroo butts
and feather dusters.
to mean transvestites.....
ginger ale is
their source of
curing nocturnal emissions...
of toxic gas!
Yesterday I was..
kissing a dog
when it screamed,
"Birds are tasty"
and sprouted horns
and a third
swollen carotid artery
which he named
Billy the Kid...
in honor of
getting Rock Bottomed.
The Ultimate Warrior...
slipped on dung
and laughed merrily.
Clowns started blowing
up orphanages using....
explosive foods and
Highly combustible liquids.....
made from cats......
droppings and bird...
semen found in
Mr. Rogers' coffee
which adds flavor
and salty aftertaste
To orange juice.....
that's 0% OJ....
, 100% Al Cowlings.
Cows smell like
delicious nutritious bacon....
stuffed in their
Mouths after protests.......
from war pigs
who fly like
an emperor penguin
with anal beads
in its nostrils
for decoration purposes
and smelling poop
from Hell's imps.......
and smelled of
Satan's lactacting nipple....
which tastes great
mixed with sardines
and sliced pickles!
Yesterday, in Tunisia..
children with glowing...
bikes started drawing
pictures of your
disgusting bellybutton lint
drenched in jelly...
doughnuts, eaten by....
blobs of fat...
and tap dancing
drunken obese geese.
Yesterday I discovered..
Wendi Richter's greatness...
while branding cattle.
A purple penguin....
played air guitar
and chewed gum
just for kicks
and blew up
right next to
a dynamite factory
causing mass panic
and considerable flatulence...
but luckily nothing
turned into slime.
Across town there
many people farted...
after eating fish
at the diner
and monkey testicles
wrote science books...
with sexual deviance
because they could
Withstand extreme levels.....
of scrotum perspiration
After vigorous exertions.....
drinks were spilled
on an old
Tortoise who retreated....
inside an old
Dungeon whose walls....
were really old
But didn't leak.....
human fatty oils
thankfully, because young
Cockroaches had infested......
the large stone
That blocked the .....
entrance to a
Harem of bearded....
goats who licked
an old man's
Face while kicking.....
him in the
Stomach and fleeing....
to the land
Where trolls lurk......
under mouldy washer/dryers
Which can transform....
into tonka trucks
and dirty underpants
or zebra testicles
but there was
a donkey show
in town and
the masses attended
AWA Wrestlerock 1986...
where tickets were
Made from human...
fingernails and cabbage....
and knob cheese
yet tasted great.
"Will it end?"....
cried Paris Hilton
as she destroyed...
her sphinctral muscles
with a blender.
Tacos began eating
the earth's crust
following freak accidents...
near the Japanese
rice fields where
radiation leaked onto
some Corn Flakes
resulting in flying
migrant workers who
shouted "Oh Yeah!!!"....
After witnessing poetic......
writing in blood....
by blind sheep!
Magneto altered poles....
on planet Ego...
MechaManiac III, Godzilla's...
tail wagged repeatedly
as he barked
up the Empire.......
and started tapdancing
while choking on....
very big balls
that belonged to
THE Ron Jeremy
who waxed them
repeatedly and it
made them transparent
to horny dogs.
Fred shot the
laughing nun Sunday..
whilst listening to
Red Rooster rock...
with Jimmy Hart
Fervently break dancing.......
in a jacuzzi
Filled with warm......
and tasty tacos
smothered in hot
monkey butt sauce
fresh from the
backyard of Mr.
Dressup. Finnegan barked....
like a crazed
blood soaked werewolf...
Whose rabid bite.......
could turn men
Into nervous wrecks.....
and 16th century
Alchemists who falsified.....
watching Hiliary Clinton...
To avoid unnecessary....
bursts of diarrhea
and uncontrollable vomiting...
due to seeing
Chyna's bizarre private...
gold seated toilet
which houses The
Loot from robberies.....
utilizes giant flamethrowers....
To melt steel.....
and kill Yoda.
"Who really cares?"
is the question
That baffled theologians.......
devoted to silver...
Tongued false prophets......
and long-tongued pornstars
Who provided pleasure.....
through the art
Of landscape painting......
but could not
ressurect Haile Selassie
or eat cats
that were dipped...
in chocolate sauce
made from humans.......
and their dogs
as was foretold
by Tommy Chong!
I'm sorry, but..
I loudly farted
awakening several eels
who shot electricity
into tubs of
blue whale blubber
which morphed into
an animal cracker.
The cracker was
eaten with fava
and moose testicles.
An hairless werewolf....
with a speech
impediment threw up
ten million spiders....
onto Ron Weasley.....
who enjoyed it
despite his phobia......
regarding arachnid vomit.
Underpants began to
explode due to..
discarded toxic waste....
straight from Trevor's
tunnel of love
south of the
Scottish border where....
Merlin the Magician...
converted to Lutheranism
into darker voodooism.......
after consulting with
esperanto speaking dolphins...
who ate underpants
and drank sap
from elderberry trees...
and their water
Really stank of.....
Torgo's bodily fluids.
Otto the repairman...
was throwing wrenches
at Menard's nostrils . . .
, the sexiest nostrils
in the land,
Of sensational noses.....
which are tasty
To ravenous cannibals.....
from Alaska who
pro wrestle lumberjacks...
wearing thong undies
Tried to impress....
the dead chickens.....
souls, which corrputed
Pee Wee Herman...
Beyond any expected.....
measure of excellence
Which encouraged his.....
documentation of the
"third nipple" theory
Originally suggested by...
Krusty The Clown
After carefully examining....
the remaining haggis....
That Spartan warriors.....
puked over Egypt.....
dried up, thus
Blocking the Nile......
River from draining....
And preventing transport.....
Old people to....
Buy new camels.....
for transportation use.
Gigantic sandstorms prevented.....
James Bond from...
Finding Blofeld's girlfriend.....
to take over....
a dung factory
serving the greater
Krakens virgin women......
who delighted in..
feeding the ducks
with a vuvuzela
made from Chocolate....
Flavored Dung. Legendary
crazy cool cats...
with 1970s sideburns
were seen dancing..
on the roof
while juggling large ...
hot spicy tacos
and farting silently..
the smell epicly
Cured every cancer....
ironcailly, of butt
cheeks with warts
that had gerbils
stuffed snugly inside
stupid sparlkling vampires....
that played banjos
with their feet.
Their long toenails ...
wrapped around Pluto...
when teenage girls
said"yer gross!"
But still wanted....
Blueberry Jam pancakes...
with a side
of moose testicles
smothered in marmalade
with a side
of bat eyeballs
and bat wings.
No respectable chef......
making swedish meatballs ...
and repeating, "bork!",
will fart in
the scrambled eggs
but will in
the Kraft Dinner...
making it bubbly
yet strangely smelly
like the Swedish
Fish in Wal-Mart
that gargled salt-water
and battery acid
through their bums
very very impressively.
Meanwhile naked clowns...
farted party favors
and burped candy
though none cared.
Kids were distracted
By mounted jugglers....
who wore pink
Leotards and silver.....
mercury hats, which....
can shave backs
of people's heads...
and cut off
their pee pees
with mutated eyes
and frog warts
and smiley pies
to the skull
of grey aliens...
with seven toes
but 8 toenails
the eighth of
which grew on...
a tenticle sticking
the middle finger...
up a persons
narrow vas deferens
Causing physical discomfort.....
and sensual pleasure
causing them to..
Perspire almost uncontrollably......
and scream, "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!"..
Despite falling into....
pits of lava
inhabited by Monchichis
Set free from....
Martian moon riders...
who fart from
Scottish Gorilla Pimps.....
Purple Cheez Whiz...
and silly string
Which blocked the.....
huge gelatinous hand
Which tried to....
a big hard
steel plated robot...
wearing a thong
backwards for comfort
While peeling neon-pink Latex
condoms from his
nylon utility belt...
which was on
Booster Gold's leg...
after they engaged
in a 69..
Chevy Camaro where....
they ate hamsters
and old people.
Tuesday I ate..
Donnie Darko and
Harvey the Rabbit...
with Yoda's lightsaber
on the side.
An interdimensional fairy...
decided to vent
his inner feelings...
about ear hair
to anyone who
ate ear hair
and laminated poodles
to use for
Uwe Boll's screenings...
of Andy Milligan...
singing like Pavarotti...
while wearing panyhose
and ten sombreros...
2.7 out of...
1000 gallons of
kryptonite were used
to create sandwiches....
for Krypto and...
the Nuclear Man
from Superman IV.
Rats are throwing
up in the
Bloodied Iron Maiden*....
*not the band
A Templer Knight.....
Picks scabs, to mark the time.
Three words at
Any given time.....
cause mass panic
within penal colonies
and those words
"lick my lovepump"
forced sheep to
dance a jig...
and sing a
a baaaaaaaaaaaad lullaby....
about dead emus
resurrected for slavery
and burger flipping
at vegan cookouts
and wearing hats.
"DAMN YOU LITERATURE!"...
cried Boss Hogg....
as he peed
in soup cans
while eating flies
and being quizzed
About improper transactions.....
involving the convertion
of Kraft Dinner...
into cat food
from "Corpse Grinders"..
incredibly brutal advertisements...
of snail entrails...
from Bad singers.....
aired on PBS
and on Skinemax
Uncut AND containing.....
Roseanne Barr nudity.... :buggedout:
causing mass blindness
Particularly when intercut with video of Raymond Burr as Carmen Miranda.
Godzilla acted decisively.....
when too many
limes were thrown
at mime acts
*Alandhopewell please make sure your posts in this thread are three words only, thanks!
done in blackface...
by Tommy Wiseau
, The Nostalgia Critic,...
, and Pauly Shore.
Wendy Williams grabbed...
a magic towel
to cover her
Lack of insurance.......
while the ever-salivating press
added too many
(aland, pay closer attention! The rules are 3 words at a time! Thanks! :smile:)
words to alandhopewell's
extremely long vocabulary
which mystified Mister...
Rogers and his
extensive collection of
Land of Make-believers
who drank paint
from sippy cups
whilst reverently genuflecting
while King Diamond....
ate a pinecone
with his anus
thus causing bleeding
in teenage groupies
Who constantly snorted.....
crumbs of Cheez-its
and mysterious things
into their pancreas
Requiring medical intervention.....
by Dr. Strangelove
intelligent alien probes...
lurbricated with hot
precious bodily fluids
found in JJ80's
Grand'ma's cedar chest
next to her
giant monster egg...
eating monitor lizard
which had mononucleosis
of it's genitals
located in his
mutant second brain....
named Giant Tail
aka Geoffery Radune
Esquire the Third
Wizard Of Oz
of Salsberry Lane...
and Jabroni Drive
next to 7-11
which sells zombies
as pet watchdogs...
for corporation protesters
for the price
of baby hamsters
the talking pumpin
ate small children
Marinated in A-1
sauce with honey
roasted peanuts and
cod liver oil
with horse head
and dirty knickers.
Stan and Ollie...
threw dead parrots
which belonged to
Captain Kirk's boyfriend
Sponge Bob Squarepants
who liked almonds
flavored bacon strips.....
in his cereal
with sour milk
and elephant tusks
dipped in chocolate...
For tribal chieftains.....
who lick owls
and rabbit feet...
during last Wednesday's
soccer game between
Superman and Batman
in outer space...
with special guests...
The Muppet Babies
and the Ghostbusters....
along with Cher
Wearing a protective.....
pair of goggles ....
To prevent damage....
to the prostate
Of foolish spectators....
with bald heads ....
and bad debt
who eat worms
while drinking peepee
with a walrus...
named Super Fly
Jimmy Snuka. Meanwhile,
at the party ...
Silverlady fought William
the Weird in...
a cage match
which caused elation
and then hysteria ...
by drunk elves
at Santa's workshop
dancing naked until ...
Santa strips nude
and inseminated Blitzen
and then sodomizes.....
Rudolph and Dasher
with a rusty
pipe wrench,when suddenly the reindeer....
Flew straight into.....
a huge blender
Already filled with....
milk from a
pregnant turtle, but
A power cut.....
ruined many dinners
for Ol' Yeller...
who had developed
a second head
on his butt...
which barked constantly....
at pink flamingos ...
on front lawns
of the Vatican ...
beside the Popemobile
which was leaking
radioactive turbine grease...
Into a reservoir....
of recycled saliva
from slobbering dogs ...
owned by infidels
like me. We
leaped into a..
whales blow hole
and enjoyed caviar
Served by shipwrecked.....
with the girls
from Punky Brewster
and the Monkees ...
with Miss Piggy
In a barrel...
(You realize this is the post of the beast,right...)
marked "666." Satan
went shopping for
Eggbeaters and Tofu ...
but sadly forgot
their hentai collection
contained no copys
of extensive footage
of groin waxing
starring Richard Simmons
and Roseanne Barr...
eats pooed marshmallows
in her underwear
and coughs up
candy coated seaweed...
with raisins. Elmo
was tickled by
Oprah's hairy pet...
named Mr. Stedman
whose criminal activity.......
with Cocker Spaniels ...
involving angry sheep
dressed in lingerie
from thrift stores
using slave labor
in a fashion
show at Kmart
That was raided
by Eddie Murphy
and Don Johnson...
tribute bands who
Wore pastel coloured
old wrinkled underpants
under their kilts...
During soccer matches....
between Godzilla and...
Giant mobile statues......
the Muppets strip
All metallic parts......
to create shelter
from a melting
Cheeze Whiz glacier
dripping and dripping
all over the
Giganta's heaving chest...
By a sleazy....
smelly pink leopard
prompting Lisa Kudrow...
To demand sanctuary....
from rational thought.
Total sensory deprivation......
is my middle
aged daughter's kink
For closely observing....
the hideous thing...
eating Tootsie Pops ...
and bringing democracy...
and frozen margaritas ...
to Munchin Land
using dead cows
as a shield
to deflect blubber
Leaking from stranded.....
robots named Robot
Capable of illogical.......
dancing processes. MacGyver...
is sniffing underwear
(but not Trevor's)
As survival matters.....
By saying Groovy...
Gravy Ghoulash Dinner!
McGuver then licks
his mom's blouse.....
hoping for ants
tickle his scrotum....
While French waitresses....
threw magic beans...
at mutated lobsters
Whose menacing attitude.....
annoyed the chef.
Food critics agreed....
"IT Stinks!" was....
The verdict until....
food started dancing
At Taco Bell ...
where JJ80 passed.....
great smelling gas
full of Iridium.......
Which offended activists.....
of odd odors
containing bee sperm....
skunk spray, ears
explode do to......
fish farting in
every one's mouth.....
Causing intense nausea......
from one's bowels.....
except for Godzilla
who was immune.
The flying hamburger
farted juicy pickles
Rendered in suet
while making people
Fondly remember listening.....
to Zombie Teletubbies....
killing evil corn
With combine harvesters....
driven by mutant ...
bunnies with purple
McDonald's chicken mcnuggets...
Meanwhile, some white
banana played E.T.......
the Atari game
without a controller
using super powers
Based on leprosy
...,and resurrected threads...
from Hell's anus.....
south of Mexico
,north of Canada
, west of Pittsburg
, east of China
next to K-Mart.
Precious bodily fluids
can be yours
if the price
is right Bob!
Unfortunately, it's not......
right to me
" said Bob, scratching
his hair, which
produced ripe pumpkins......
at the roots,
while simultaneously fermenting
using black paint
on some guy
for grins and
Smashed up eggs
with tasty ears
filled with wax
and a muffler
which sprayed narcotics
because they cause
premature ejaculation in
a photobombing cow's.....
eyes resulting in
Massive genocide of.....
atomic super men
wearing pink bikini's.....
and nothing else
on their heads.
Soon after we
eat fresh undies
we wish we
were eating women's
darling children, because
they make sticks
out of generic
tasting eye balls
shaped like testicles.....
of dogs because
without ketchup to put on them,
(^rules are three words at a time, just an FYI :wink:)
they smell like
evil mutated pumpkins
raped squirrels for....
their crunchy nuts
The odd thing about crunchy nuts is...
they spit blood
down Sandy's underpants...
into eggnog bottles.....
that contain sperm
from vampire bats
gang banging squids.....
and rotting pumpkins
mauled by sloths......
wearing frog skin
covered in nutella....
and bat saliva
aka Bull's fetish.......
named Tooth Fairy
The Slutty Turtle.....
turned the Meridian Key . . .
into Banana pie....
topped with snails
and Cool Whip...
and purple hair
hooker killing ninjas.......
with her deadly
honey flavoured pie...
Playing Polka Metal.......
And Waltzing Matilda.
in orange lingerie.....
covered with ghosts
sperm, mixed with.....
great smelling gas
produced by cacti....
in polar regions
of Pluto. Uranium......
gives three eyes
to someone named....
Mr. Mean Man
who drinks urine....
because it transforms
his colon into.....
a squishy mess
of ducks, chips
and hookers from....
your mom's house.
in Rhode Island....
where elves strip :buggedout: :buggedout: :buggedout:
at DarkSider's house...
squirrels throw bombs
at rotten nuts
Where a horse.....
is licking doors
made of humans........
and flying pigs
who bathed in....
precious bodily fluids
of menopausal sasquatches . . .
and Chewbacca's too
creating Sperm monsters......
that were nonthreatening
to dancing alligators.
Meanwhile, at Bob's
palace of wisdom
everyone took leave
because Bob's shirt......
scared due to
overwhelming pit stains
at my house.
No convenient excuse.....
for White Castle
exists. Still, I
make sushi belches . . .
right at noon....
When Sonny Chiba.....
ate dog food
with a spork
alongside Mork and...
his boy Elroy
daughter Judy however...
sought Will Robinson...
and his squid
that bob ate.....
for sexual gratification
and to prove...
That Tiger Punch......
Failed to intimidate....
JJ80, Me, Bob.....
or Derf the...
Chicken raping dinosaur.....
who attended at
Brown University for
The frat parties.
The drunk unicorn
kills bob's toilet....
angering me, so
gangster geese flies...
decided to mate
with cheese burgers...
in shallow water
Heavily contaminated by.....
horny rhinos skiing.....
Downhill into inevitable.....
uphill icy volcano...
Whose eruptions reshaped.....
every guy's beards....
Across the Mediterranean.....
into Putin's car...
Causing the Kremlin.....
which caused diarrhea...
Among traditional communists.....
and their pets
playing hop scotch....
in landmine fields.
which is made....
Less hazardous by......
radioactive venom bees....
great smelling gas
And sweet honey...
From JJ80's rectum....
emerged covered in
plastic bubble wrap
and purple paint
Which thankfully concealed......
some yucky leakage
from Niagara Falls....
Meanwhile, in your.....
Own private cellar......
a misunderstood termite
started biting walls
made from Nutella......
and dead butterflies
flocked to Bob's
Burgers, which burned....
With unbridled intensity.....
of 30oF, causing....
plants to mutate
into feline like...
hamburger buns with
inedible seasame seeds
with seven inch
poisonous barbed tallywhackers
and screaming hotdogs
with acidic mustard.
spread on porn...
that belonged to
Frankenstien's giant monster
butt, making it....
emit good smells.
When he wears
your mom's perfume
on his butt
Meanwhile, Batman ate
Trevor's damp undies
after being dared
by Big Bird
under penalty of
Grand Theft Auto...
which made John
do the macarena.
In his underwear....
while listening to
George Jones's brother...
raping zombie unicorns
using a pitchfork
and a rusty.......
bicycle pedal, made....
...from little boys...
eyes and ears
Of avid supporters....
of spider doughnuts....
...there is a way...
to spit poison
underpants
At gargantuan porcupines.......
until rainbows shoot...
multicolored dead skunks
Which terrified local......
toilet cleaners because
Discarded chicken curry.....
...actually doesn't taste that bad after you...
eat dead whales.
Meanwhile, jellyfish swamped.....
onto CJ's prostitute.....
,named Ichabod Crane,
who arrested Eddy.....
for throwing frogs
Down Santa's Chimney....
...creating a barbecue...
of roasted pickles....
Which attracted hordes.....
of zombie sheep
tits lactating lava,,,,,
exploding Christmas trees
...and a herd of wild, rabid buffalo...
Who failed to....
suck metal tits.....
and stick to
Plan 9 from....
Ancient Rome where.......
Nero's slaves bashed....
disco dancing robots
who fell down...
the pit of
Infinite darkness which.....
made fried snake...
charmers sadly realize
That robotic cobras.....
are really unicorns...
Tremendously mutated by.......
robot babies from...
your mom's kitchen
With it's impeccable....
dancing merry mushrooms
who juggle babies
with flaming chainsaws
and a cactus
eating nymphomaniac named....
Sponge Bob Squarepants
. Meanwhile at Ponderosa,
Mutant cows began
pull the string
attached to the
radioactive atomic bomb
with flying, flaming,
spider spewing venom...
and toxic farts
that caused major
Traffic chaos around......
the archaic boulevard
while the ghosts
Haunted several paranoid......
nuns on skateboards
who wore thongs
during their showers
with dancing vampires
and sparkling trolls...
who sing opera
off key with a
string pulling Lugosi
loving guy named...
Prince Humperdink the
renowned cow lover
while bungee jumping
Off Mount Everest.....
reading Mad Magzine
and farting loudly
an Irish ditty...
about Trevor's undies
which are so
toxic and flammable
they are registered
-with the Smithsonian-
In Upper Volta-
(This mess needs to be read by Stephen Wright.)
Ugandan Giant Kamala...
farts the alphabet
backwards while the
deformed crawling freaks...
watch Bucky Larson
chase Kathy McGee
into the disco
where fire breathing...
Dilletantes fry catfish.
Great smelling gas
from Mount Kilimanjaro...
fills the sexy
sensual shape of
Jabba the Hutt
while Princess Leia
farts amusing Luke
Skywalker anecdotes about
Han Solo's purple
colored third nipple
which is actually
a sentient creature...
named Count Dracula
with stale cereal
loosely confined in
his upper gums...
and who also
Plays the Theremen
with boxing gloves
and a mace
of diamond encrusted
big brown turd.
Who's name was
Eugene the Great
Kung Fu Master
Esquire the Third.
Who was suspected
of stealing pelicans
dressed in drag.
One might say
dinosaurs are extinct ...
But you would
be wrong because
I said so.
Why do mushrooms ...
flip the bird
to truffles in
baked banana bread
filled with diapers
for young Trevor
to find underwear
Meanwhile film archivists
have explosive diarrhea
and lack Kaopectate
To stop up
zany flying squirrels
with flying, flaming
bags of poo.
However, the great
Bloodied Doughnut Princess
Shakes her head in disbelief at the soiled
Widgets, wadgets and
great smelling gas
emitted by badgers
named Horny Bucky
Barnes, the famous
and Impotent McLimpdick...
related to Dracula
and his Rakshasa...
Rama De Kamasutra
the Terrible Turk...
who ate lice
while pro wrestling...
against Al Gore
while simultaneously singing
the theme to
this online forum
the Torgo theme
Played on Kazoos
by evil sharks
with clogged nostrils
wearing Trevor's underpants
while eating snails
with broken sporks
spraying flammable slime...
into everything that
contained open code
for the rejuvenation
of nuclear vampires
so as to
defeat Godzilla's brother
Moadib the Mole...
before the Sardaukar
taught sandworms how
to sip tea...
from urinal cakes
and excrete spice
Rum cakes with
sore cauliflower ears...
filled with Torgo
in a dress.........
pudding pops from
the angry red
Planet named Moya.
whose large upturned
Venus Pons makes
Trevor's undies dance
Like Torgo on
a drinking binge
after eating hair
and drinking relish
flavored Dr. Pepper
and purple trolls
with painted faces...
reminding one of
good bar soap.
keeping lawyers clean
in private areas
of John Malkovich...
Meanwhile, in Narnia
goats licked poles
of frolicking centaurs
pulling the string
from Rob Lowe's
career causing mass
ghosts wearing sandles
In a parking
lot in hell
Or Newark, whichever
floats your boat
on jelly folds...
that are beer
flavored cat pee
disguised as hentai....
pube shaving zombies
with poor manners
on the tiolet
of Katy Perry
they vomited everywhere
Except where Charo
smelled Trevor's undies
where he stood...
then ate them.
with Hinds ketchup
Suddenly, urinal cakes
with sound chips
starting vibrating loudly
to the tune
of YMCA! People
boiled their pajamas...
with Trevor's undies
full of stains
and buttered fish
for JJ80's birthday.
The global celebrations.....
set off riots
In towering skyscrapers.....
Located in Mars
where fans of
Richard Dean Anderson
Whose mullet attracted.....
a massive sharknado
with drunk cats
and The Ghostbusters
ate Johnsonville Brats!
Lazy pest exterminators.......
farted at cows
just to spite
bored accidental hausfrauen
caused by umbrellas
That exploded like
a whale with
flying flaming remnants
Of a Twiwaneese
gorilla throwing poo
with Trevor's undies
at King Kong
Who is playing
gerbils with beer
a Latvian game
and Zod won.
of basketball, using
the national razor
which contained trace
and TV's Frank
But then the U.S. Military
gave us Spartacus
drunk disco dancing
In the sky.
"Look," cried the
purple people eater
as he pointed to a giant, flying, fire-breathing gigantocypris, that was slowly approaching him.
Suddenly, poo flew
from the sky, and at
the Klingon hordes
Because of this,
Han Solo stripped
his furry wookie
Then he realized
The stripper was
actually a frog
name Kermit, which
ate his brains
and drank blood.
After watching Gamera,
Igor drank acid
and died of
1,000 gerbil bites
after being licked
lovingly by Torgo
he turned into
Sponge Bob Squarepants
who fried bologna
and drank beer
for the goodness
cut the cheese
and then had
ate his thong.
The anachronistic, but
happy farting man
jovially pranced along
bending his wookie.
Then he sang
the hokey pokey
and he stuck
his tongue in
and his tongue
licked dog poo
and then fell
On my pretty
, furry, black cat
Which pulled out
a deadly ribauldequin
which shot itself
in the noggin
And the horse
declared war against
Peggy Hill and
his Jedi fish
That burned it's
eyes out since
it was colorful
and also quite
heterogeneous, in the
nature of all
quaint lizard societies
which are also
and they live
really close by
to Tom Waits'
well known, but
somewhat cryptic tenement
where in dwells
the menacing commodity
that in reality
lived inside tenebrous
but surprisingly airy
underground sewers, that
provide free shelter
for the sweltering
hordes of gibbering
antimatter space buzzards
pooped out chickens
with a giant
noticeable adam's apple
but never a
head bigger than
the eye of
the golden lucuma
in the sun.
Afterwards, the evil
herd of cats
came out of
the Schlitz brewery
drunk as frogs
and belched loudly
the entire alphabet!
backward & forwards
and in Greek
while making great
boasts and joyful
screams, he then
called Lex Luthor
to smack him
on the bottom
so he'd defecate
rainbow ice cream
onto someone's head
while they stood
on a pier
Of dead fish
and vicious whales
killed by Ahab.
planed their revenge
and helicoptered their
grossly overweight purple
children of the
Uncle Ruckus bloodline...
ate Genghis Khan
and his one
big red dog
with the plane!
After that, a
flying, flaming, remnant
of Indiana Jones'
young student harem
crashed through the
ceiling of a whorehouse
being raided by
trumpets wearing kilts
that lacked sporrans
but had miniguns
Mounted on it's.....
two headed grasshopper
which sniffed glue
from it's long
, stringy banana, and
Vomited on command
They attacked Tuvalu
with sharp sticks
made of energon
an 'intimacy enhancer'
that had magical
Motorcraft oil filters
that could summon
a magical Turkey
that was able
to survive Thanksgiving
after a fight
with Elmer Fudd
using daffy duck
as a club
to trash Subway
while totally naked
and painted like
the millennium falcon
on a bet.
The flying cat
fought the duck
to a draw.
Suddenly, bird poop
came to life
and drove away
on a unicycle
with a DeLorean
made from animated
talking pickles named
Poing
and their cousin
Billy Bob Thornton
why played bass
with his ass
while reciting Othello
high on Lorazepam.
The Christmas poo
played with Santa
on a Nintendo
and hard liquor
flowed like water
and cats watched.
as a giant
gerbils drank beef
and eat beer
with giant bratwursts
but then they
fired all phasers
the cats notice
Unicorn ice cream
being sold by
Jason Voorhees mother
after a jellybean
and a doughnut
walked across a
blowup doll named
John Wayne Bobbitt
who was famous
for eating undies
and eating jackfruit
played Tomb Raider
on a tightrope
crashing a starship
from moose testicles
That could change
into butterflies made
of Ivory soap
that could explode
whales on Mars
into fresh pieces
of sea salt.
of giant moths
that are zombies
and frequently devour
old copy machines
for a late
midnight snack, after
having explosive diarrhea
precious bodily fluids.
It had to
dress in cardboard
after lazily eating
five pounds of
cheddar cheese panties
drenched in butter
made from polyunsaturated
dirty used thongs!
that Chuck Norris
Personally sniffed for
Trevor's birthday purge
for the cause
with fried turkey
of setting fire
at the place
where Flamingos can
poop out gold
and chew tobacco
with wild abandon!
Meanwhile, a goat
Pulled a .45
from his mouth
and yelled, "Hey
"Let's disco, pardner!"
then farted loudly
at Donald Trump's
mouth, causing vomit
comets and gerbils
to dance erratically
on a toothbrush
carefully balanced on
Trevor's used undies
After Trevor ate
the ladies swimsuits
Which caused them
to turn green
and kiss Jar-Jar
On his ring
then beam up
Doctor McCoy's privet
Saurian brandy stash
south of Uranus
where it smells
like a Klingon's
Blood-wine breath.
Great smelling gas
is what Frank
Stallone regularly emits.
when watching CBS
while drinking beer
and eating worms
garnished with a
bit of undies
From the Indies
with house salad
at Hotel Torgo!!!!
With Jesus Quintana.
shakin' it's booty
all over the
Oval Office while
raiding the stationary
of used condoms
that exploded when
overly inflated by
Donald Trumps ego
sends kittens flying
quickly into outerspace
just in time
to be eaten
by Han Solo
and Chris Crocker.
A bat bit
the bitter butt
of Big Bird
while snorting Drano.
Lions ate flowers
made from marzipan
That smelled like
Trevor's burnt undies
had died in
vats of Budweiser
and dog hair
wrapped around a
long, hard sweaty
man name Jeb.
Meanwhile, in Tangiers
Indiana Smith discovered Trevor's . . .
... hidden stash of ...
extra nouns and
toxic used underwear
and ate them.
While vomiting verbosely,
he liked the
arrowhead shaped skid marks
and used three
hot dogs for
illustrating how to
purify his thoughts
in Duggar machines
with his farts
that smelled like
sweet, sweet, love
from Mars pigs.
using the Starship
USS Bud Light
near smelly Uranus
found the Klingons
watching a remake
of Pawn Stars.
Touch the monkey
said Andy Dick,
while eating pizza
while sitting in
a public restroom
which, strangely, wasn't
smelling like s**t
on that day
That Rock Hudson
ate Trevor's undies
with maple syrup
and liked it!
The Starship Lollipop
returned from Uranus
, which was stinky,
Due to klingons
caught in a time loop
(Sorry, I went over three!)
with Bill Murray
caught in a
the bottomless pit
of Chers vagina
and Zap Rowsdower.
After that happened,
Zioxx rose again.
and after belching
out Klingon roses
That bust into
George Gershwin tunes
squeaking them out
in drunk German
horses and cows
flying to puke
In the nest
of verbose vipers
wearing giant bras
that glow like
Las Vegas neon
made radioactive by
a zombie snowman.
Meanwhile the cats
were stealing beer
from the Cardassians
while Jason Bourne
was out bowling
with Luke Skywalker
Using his lightsabre
and the Force
to achieve nothing
since Han Solo
Gave Captain Kirk
an atomic wedgie
on the bridge
crossing the Arno
River, next to
Tom Servo's house
where R2-D2 sings
into Chad Mitchel's
big hairy nose
where the air
is highly toxic
yet still heavenly
smells of cat
and rancid burritos
mixed with vanilla
Cooked at 425f.
Meanwhile, Edna trimmed
Seymour Skinner's bush
with dull clippers
while Nelson watched.
green grass grow
over the tinkle
pipe of Mr.
Magoo, wiping his
eyes with sandpaper
for no reason
except the fart
from the piano
smelled like roses
and cat litter
great smelling gas
and a burning
sensation unlike others
at warp one
makes goats hurl
charred burrito nuggets
all over Picard's
shiny new codpiece
and Beverly's back.
Stupid, sexy Flanders
high on life
and paint huffing
Homer's dirty whites
and yellow wax
encrusted security badge
pinned to his
great big freezer
while sniffing glue
and turkey wraps
on the floor
of the Smithsonian
wearing pink taffeta
while Kirk laughed
and fondled himself
with vibrating Klingons
who liked it
Meanwhile, Aunt Martha
loaded her Gatling
with her pee
frozen into bullets
disco dancing zombies
Then attack the
local brain trust
for their views
on postpartum depression
with mint frosting
covered wax lips
and beer soaked
Kellogs Bran Flakes
with dead rats
and live gerbils.
All your base
belong to Hulk
and to Daenerys
the purple Smurf
who ate Smurfs
high in calories
with Mr. Gargamel
with dead camels
drinking molten gold
while inside a
hot air balloon
flying over Coruscant
the city of
chocolate covered peanuts
and copulating Hutts
wearing purple sparkles
and green condoms
as a fashion
Meanwhile the Greeks
entered singing 'Copacabana'
with the tardigrades
to entertain Yoda
Who was spouting
a talking turnip
and dancing widdershins
while undressing Chewbacca
and shaving him
with a dull
dried prune, with
large throbbing onions
and pulsating, billious
Australian Cattle Dogs
clucking like chickens
and throwing glass
in my coffee
then up my
but and around
the Antares maelstrom
near talking rats
and hungry tribbles
who planned the
great android revolution
from a hole
in Starkiller Base
the dancing pirate
Bluetush the terrible
from smelly Uranus
Meanwhile my car
started changing colors
and singing baudy
about Klingon women
because, why not,
they have such
large and pendulous
dudes in bed
the talking taco
screamed in Yiddish
"Bigfoot is god!
causing the Yeti
to cry like
a poopie pantsed
bat named Jeb
Busch the 125th
ranked testicle from
the gerbil store
in upper lower
side of the
middle of the
Starfleet strip club
where tentacles are
and panda poop
While drinking jello
is the norm.
in Newark Ohio
, where I was
quacking at statues
while dressed as
a Solaris server.
I met a
robot who ate
southern fried jockstraps
and boy, were
they awesome, like
Tom Brady's crusty
crunchy ram chips
covered with slime
Daeneyrs and Tyrion
called Captain Hair
on the toilet
because, why not,
because I'm constipated
from eating Lithuanian
gerbils and cheese
all at once
to prevent Einsteins
condom from breaking
like Humpty Dumpty
in the outhouse
into the poop
Meanwhile in Istanbul
Carman San Deigo
yelled Leeeeroy Jennnnnnnkins!
Great smells farts
the big cheese
A limburger soul
and top dog
all combined to
vote for Nigel
in beauty contests.
using Hungarian polo
players to count
cats guzzling beer
and dogs sniffing
beer soaked napkins
is a terrible
Independence Day party
game. A better
one involves Gerbils
and a vat
made of leather
brassieres stitched together
with Klingon hair
and Romulan pubic
lice eat eggs
drinking Dirty Sanchezs
cheap red shoe
and biting sunglasses
with other peoples
infant circumcision trainers
with purple nipples
and purple rain
soaked diaper reeking
bad borgified gerbils
in wine sauce
and Klingon whiskey
made with youngling
cats from Mars
eating Sandor's chicken
using the bones
of The Mountain
and geese poop
to create political
unity using undies
worn by gerbils
Then Spectreman appeared
with Tor Johnson
naked which kids
stole a car
and ran over
Bela Lugosi's tribbles
with a steamroller
painted a greenish
cat fur color
That smelled like
linen and lavender
mixed with p**s
and assorted vegetables
and Dennis ate em!
Dennis! :thumbup:
with a toothy
zombie beer swilling
sidekick named Todd.
Santa ate Todd
With BBQ sauce
and immediately suffered
chronic anal bleeding
and Bud Light
shot out his
nostrils and nether
regions, for fun
he then ran
over George Forman
and his marvelous
ten foot dong
deep fried in
precious bodily fluids
and Coca Cola
made on Coruscant
by Fred Flinstone
and law students
threw Godzilla at
the giant Torgo.
Giant Torgo puked
up a heaping
helping of LSD
and King Kong
sympathy threw up
Ms. Pacman's panties
which evolved into
a giant Pokemon
Beer. Whiskey. Vodka.
All are good!
I take paypal
in my new
talking car, named
Billy Bob Robot
esquire the third
And then Edgar
stripped for Yoda
while salsa dancing
to "Old McDonald"
with beer bellies
bouncing and jiggling
on Red Skull
eating the afterlife
mummified zombie remains
of beer cats
with hot sauce
Meanwhile Judge Judy
got a tattoo
Of Nathan Fillion's
butt on his
slab of bacon
because of poop
and portable bedsores.
that changed color
based on feelings
in torts class
about tentacle porn
and Ferengi porn
radioactive cats danced
around giant gerbils
and cats danced
around the Cardassians
Until the dawn.
When dawn came
great smelling farts
and noble lagers
emerged from beneath
my torts book
carried by cats
and Jar Jar
ate his legs
and portable urinals.
A talking dog
ate my condoms
, which were used,
by the cat,
with Bela Lugosi
by Tor Johnson
for some action
with a midget
named Big John
master of proctology
and kitten eating
underneath the Ohio
river near nuclear
Rads high school
in smelly Uranus
Falls Minnesota, east
of smelly balls
North Dakota, south
of hairy nuts
Indiana, the popular
world famous archeologist
and hemorrhoid sufferer
who single handedly
masturbated. Indiana Smith
, master of farts,
Judge Bryant Durham
and a chinese
used car salesman
humped car mufflers
while Denver Allen
uses Mongolian yak
and hollered f**kman
envious of mufflers
and other auto
parts being violated
inside Ford trucks
with little yello
streams of urine
on office memos
from Bill Lumbergh
on malfunctioning printers.
made from Indonesian
restatements of law
abiding talking tiolets
with giant bongs
full of spiders
solving quadratic equations
with toxic megacolons
jammed up their
very tasty ears
Jedi mind tricks
make Yoda kill
small inoffensive Italian
arm pit hair
that whispers Bulgarian
meat pie lullabies
while seducing moths
made from industrial
strength steel titanium
and solid neutronium
while belching the
noxious pepperoni fumes
To Mozart symphony
"Stop belching while..."
using the bathroom"
Anna shrieked while
dropping a deuce
on the BMW
filled with swimmers
of dubious intent
while drunk poop
advised the wise
Venus Fly Traps
eat yellow snow
Meanwhile the cats
juggle mouse heads
with blood dripping
from their wherever
into my mouth
which caused my
toes to curl
inside out, causing
slugs to come
to slime the
lower lip of
Captain America, who
had just won
Thor's hammer by
using his personal
foot, to steal
rules against perpetuities
that elucidate proper
From Trevor's undies
and buyer's broker
began to heave
bats and stones
plus mortgage origination
from upper Moldavia
walking into Mordor
with Trevor's undies
suffocating many because
the hurricane entered
and sharks reigned
drinking cheap beer
and smoking Russian
drastic dog dongs
plus UNIX variables
precious bodily fluids
go on sale
with big ribbons
Into Torgo's mouth
causing him to
fart the alphabet
and walk normally.
in comparison to
a constipated cow
and bacon wrapped
bacon on bacon
with Old Milwaukee
bacon flavored beer
Now Torgo's car
was being violated
by nightgown clad
long horned pigeons
using their horns
as flux capacitors
went 88 MPH (I'm cheating using numbers and an abbreviation, I don't care it's too good not to use :teddyr: )
up in the
Gerbils eating afterlives
where aftervlives taste
like zoning plans
for burial grounds
for dead cheerleaders
who ate out
the living brains
of Dr. No
which formed a
nuclear smelly poo
that started hitchhiking
with Sandor Clegane
to tar pits
and Jar Jar
danced a jig
while completely nude
making ewoks horny
along with Neelix
and Captain America
Meanwhile in Florida
, Florida Man drank
Old Milwaukee Light
through a straw
and got so
stoned he Yongaryed
and then mooned
and The Pumaman
licked Rocky Balboa
in the armpits
with his prolonged
pet lizard, Apollo,
SITTING ON HIS
big massive balls
made of inflatable
Dairy Queen blizzards
And horse semen
that hardened into
A massive dildo
shaped beer stein
That came out
on the Eisenhower
Freeway, causing panicked
People to poop
live hand grenades
Making stinky explosions
that caused Madonna
To eat undies
laced with Sirracha
From planet Hoth
pulled the lance
Of King Arthur
from the buttocks
Of King Koopa
and plunged it
into his mouth
Meanwhile in Canada
moose crapped on
Torgo and Rowsdower
who pull Iguanas
into their undies
swimming too fast
to see that
the last thing
they pooped out
was the Sharktopus
with eight dicks
running on Ubuntu
chasing Trevor's undies
to the tavern
where the bartender
was a Drazi
farted out seals
and Crofts music
eats purple markers
which cause him
to sweat whiskey
and urinate potato
Pancakes from noses
of aging pugs
that have snorted
great smelling gas
Meanwhile the organist
placed his organ
into a blender
and broke it
because of size
restrictions made by
little dick Pete
the bodily fluid
that removes stains effortlessly!
Xala Xalior Xlati
smoked big massive
Beer stuffed gerbils
for health reasons
Meanwhile Captain Archer
fires his yellow
cat from a
warp wave regenerator
into smelly Uranus
in Dragon Glass
probing ever deeper
into Sandor's chicken
who responded poorly
to Eymorg brains
by hiccupping frogs
in Romulan warbirds
who descended upon
Kermit the Frog
and his all
big pig porn
with two pigs
porking each other
like it was
bacon being cooked
and beer being
boiled under artisan
battery acid vats
with purple ears
sprouting from Godzilla's
big hairy nutsack
in Deep 14
the alternate mad
house via rectal
photon tropedo tubes
and two big
Klingon sized condoms
filled with p**s
that's very undude
according to Yoda
on page 768...
of Andrea Dworkin's
hand written note
scrawled in Kool-Aid
and Mary Jane
who is Rick James
the human phaser
set on bing
which ossifyied him
into giant kegs
filled with gongs
made of pasta
with big tires
Which were yellow
in South Africa
but blue in
the Smurfs village
with pumpkin spice
with cat nip
and Milwaukee's Best.
eating stale haggis
drinking Milwaukee's Best
while dropping LSD
in my undies
People were jealous
of the giraffe
running naked down
Hollywood Boulevard while
peeing on grass
with Klingon wizzanators
until the mighty
Kahless whizzed out
a purple canoe
The red haired
dancing knicker collector
from Gabardine Scotland
who ate kittens
drunk time travelers
smelly magical elixir
of Vulcan whiskey
and goat hair
The laser printer
used Lemmys ashes
to summon him
a Klingon poodle
named Porky Pig
and Klingon cats
with five tails
in a blender
which was set
to Klingon operas
in my pants
with underwear from
Trevor's personal collection
and eleven feet
wide and full
of Jongo Carlson's
Calrissian Cardassian Shakes
and cinnamon toast.
Elsewhere, clowns pooped
out barbed wire
and candy corn
into exploding sharks
nailing stuff on
a picket fence
Using a blowtorch
and neutronium cats
which have Phasers
attached to their
whiskers and antennae
with broken glass
they found at
gas from Uranus
with giant tallywhackers
penetrating deep within
a surprisingly chilly
a dry clam
that sings Gershwin
on the moon
Meanwhile on another
message board thread
written by Elvira
and Elvis 500
robots fornicated with
Japanese hetai loving
rapid frogs, foaming
small BB-8 units
deeply lodged in
my 5000th post
, which drew congratulations
from Captain Planet
and his all
naked wife Sindel
not to mention
his son Elroy
the wonder Hamster.
In 1994, Captain
Ahab ate whale
for dinner despite
its enormous blowhole
with Jack Daniels
and Tom Servo
(what a cool
Smelling fart I
drove an AT-M6
into the ground
using his testicle
as a brake
until it broke
off), then finished
porking the pig
that smells of
mice and men
then a Ferret
emerged from my
refrigerator and said..
"I am Torgo,
The Master brewmaster.
Have a cold
a condom on
me!" I took
my trusty spatula
Plus my beer
and proceeded to
Smash the can
in an intimate
way, making Dracula
pop his casket
and drink beer
with The Dude
while Walter rolled
up his undies
and cry, Trevor!
Trevor took his
flamethrower and used
panties, which he
did not soil
and threw them
Into his mouth
with a giant
Big, huge, massive
hand, which resembled
The spooky hippie
named Darth Dorkus
Who crapped himself
at the oscars
to the applause
of Florida Woman
Who ate unicorn
Flavored grape nuts
Covered in tar
and paper gerbils
named King Kong
which lacked a
mighty meat missle
made from soy
Fried moose testicles
with thread necromancy
taste like undies
After someone farted
on a Smurf
which got revenge
using a dildo
made of purist
gold metal in
diamante studded leather
codpiece which was
covered with mice
from outer space.
Suddenly, talking underwear
became a meme.
Trevor was glad.
They smelled strange
like something from
The black lagoon.
Trevor ate them
but they were
Made of people.
Underwear started farting
Lethal purple gas
Then stinky undies
Raped smelly socks
which disturbed Dracula
with tiny pointy
Sausage tooth picks.
Man on toilet
taking a dump
internationally void of
marshmellows and poop
but full of
pillows and gerbils
but lacking any
Fiber or muselix
but alien testicles
made from noodles
That tasted like
Santa's small scrotum
and silent fish
covered in avocados
Suddenly, the blob
started disco dancing
to everyone's horror.
Precious bodily fluids
Polluted by flouride,
and abominable scaly
mutant sperm, flowed
into Torgo's mouth
while Bobcat Goldwhaite
mooed at grass
eating the gerbils
Meanwhile, on Mars,
Ghosts ate Pac-Man
as a snack
while watching Yoda
doing hardcore porn.
with Bucky Larson.
Meanwhile, Torgo watched
Yoda doing hardcore
workouts with Snuffaluffagus
While smoking weed.
"I'm so high,"
said Yoda to
Rocky and Bullwinkle
Then Dudley Dooright
undressed and sucked
a huge bong.
Thanos joined him.
The pair played
Wildcard strip poker.
Snapping his fingers
in time with
his twisted tongue
going where it
licked Godzilla's tail
Becoming highly radioactive
suffering limp dick
from flicking peanuts
into his hairy
giant space herpes.
Torgo throwing up
with wriggly arms
is a sight
The Master jacks
his car up
to change the
Smell of tires.
associated with the
stench of undies
is vomiting profusely.
Meanwhile in s**tsville
A ravenous turd
is fighting Santa
On POV channels.
My s**tter was
smiling at poo
while secretly showing
a big hairy
tap dancing Bing
singing White Christmas'
naked on meth
courtesy Emperor Caligula
suddenly cried out
smoking a joint.....
"MARS NEEDS WOMEN! "
"and used undies!"
To power their
sex robot factory
for penis lasers
Called "trouser snakes"
throughout Japanese manga
to praise Godzilla
Blessed be his
big green testicles
Fixing the cable
which was loose
by murderous puppets
Suddenly, Adolph Hitler
pulled the string
which detonated the
man on toilet
statue. "Surprise!," yelled
an ancient Japanese
Master chilli chef.
Meanwhile, King Kong
Wore a tutu
to convince his
agent he could
seduce Lady Gaga
although he would
Never want to.
because he farts
pure laughing gas
turning people purple
to the delight
Of one eyed
one horned flying
purple people eater
who licks soap
after licking ass.
Ass on toilet
collect the money :bouncegiggle: :bouncegiggle: :bouncegiggle:
and east s**t
but Jesus wept
and cried Metamucil
condoms are great!
On the horizon
camels spit gum
at pod racers
driven by Gungas
chasing the monkey
with the chaps
with French fries
and ranch dip
along with Viagra
and a shot
of vampire blood
And we danced
like a wave
into hot magma
in an Arby's
Bathroom stall because
he had to go
drink toilet water
laced with LSD
and a dash
of Mrs. Dash
to cure loneliness
for the blind
mice, chasing monkies
and stealing jokes :wink:
from flying monkeys
Who east s**t
while unjustly imprisoned
by Kevin Spacey
and Elmer Fudd
and some cuck
collecting the monkey
and eat it
to bring forth
great smelling gas
from a luchador
named Big Dong
the fart master
who was s**tting
while reading a
manual on how
Facebook University works
from smelly Uranus.
While eating leeches
made of manure
but taste like
burnt French toast.
Meanwhile in Istanbul
people threw squirrels
having explosive diarrhea
while dancing the
pogo while eating
hot Louisiana sauce
with flying flaming
IBM Missle Turds
The giant red
turkey of doom
swooped in from
the apocolyptic sky
To dance with
a monkey's corpse
while singing the
Folsom Prison Blues
from the toilet
Courscant's east end
was rapidly becoming
the place to
collect the monkey
and drink beer.
with the local
chapter of the
the Society
of Flat Earthers
who would argue
on golden pond
where the swans
fell off the
wagon of sobriety
landing sideways in
an octagonally flipped
geodesic dome of
a hibbity gibbity
with a translucent
blown glass cucumber.
that she used
to carry the
remains of Alexander
the singing cowboy
from Lubbock, Massachusetts
who was actually
Super Scary Cher
Coruscant's beer garden
where goblins peed
and hippies crawled
and writhed and
ate prickly cacti
and drank ouzo
with naked zombies
and oversexed Gungans
Meanwhile in Gotham
our heroine found
a heroin junkie
(Do any of you guys go pages back and read some of this? :question: I do. Don't ask why, because it's total nonsense! :bouncegiggle:)
eating purple jelly
on potato pancakes
with Bela Lugosi
drinking beer from
a Franken Stein
virtual karma to Ronnie :bouncegiggle: :bouncegiggle: :bouncegiggle:
while eating eyes
and Liamal sang
"I peed blood
on Jar Jar
out of anger!
and cocaine lines
and emerged from
a putrid womb
Meanwhile the Bajorans
elected Odo to
smoke some weed
with Bob Marley
and his wild
man eating shrews
while chewing mushrooms
made of pickles
and deer antlers
also some beer
made from mushrooms
. "Take me to
the House of"
spooky vampire orgies!
Bob Marley wailed
while Adolf Hitler
wondered how he
pulled the string
while Worf ate
big moose testicles
from poor Bullwinkle
with cheese on
my funky junk
in my trunk
of giant beer
and pork chops
smothered in chunky
beef dog food
with bags of
kitchen garbage bags
filled with other
kitchen garbage bags
wrapped inside a
mummified vampire bat
in a burrito
spiced up with
large crotch crabs
with a giant
red gerbil burrito
and red fish
named Big Dick
on the TV
which was a
50's Philco Model.
THX-1138
I have spoken.
About what is
the question. The
answer is 42
but the question
is about ufo's
and how many
are really real
shaken not stirred
age quod agis
Bond, James Bond
with a martini
and a bagal
Named Squid Testicles
with giant red
Eyes filled with
some autopsioca pudding
rolling around in
Scottish man grease
Which reeked of
Stale, putrid air
from anal expulsion
of nauseous methane
from scared zebras
and dancing porcupines
from outer space
Meanwhile a duck
attacked a robot
Named Beba 2
with a carrot
Orange & pointy
and silky smooth
Because it was
a teenage zombie
wearing a tutu
with a Hatfield
Or a McCoy
by his side
without an ending
or any desire
to eat undies
at all. Sixty
thousand people farted
powering a huge
plane to Uranus
wiping out Klingons
dangling from Trev's undies
tiny sharks bite
tiny, microscopic sheep
without any cheese
or bloody teeth
That killed a.....
disco dancing duck
wearing Trevor's underpants :buggedout:
bursting out from
Torgo's nasty hat
like a Roman
Reigns wrestled a
evil anal probe
for Romulan beers
only wearing cheese
pumpernickle doodles on
his bulging eyes
and microscopic testicles
covered by ants
, not horny aunts,
want your underwear!
washed and dried....
Full of dignity
Against the bastardized....
killer clown robots