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When I said you could have an office pet, I was thinking of something along the lines of a small puppy.
"Well, you know that part about us being equal opportunity employers? Yeah, it's really biting us in the ass."
I see the Orkin man has been slacking again.
Well, what else would you expect in a corporation? All CEOs are bloodsucking, puss oozing insects.
Asking for a raise was quite unheard of in Mr. Hopper's office.
Here at Bug-B-Gone pesticides, we take our work seriously. If our product can kill a one ton grasshopper, just imagine what it will do to the insects you encounter.
Monster: "You guys got some extra copy paper?"
Thanks to the new security company bill hired, office theft dropped by 90%.
Miles away on the streets of Chicago, one giant grasshopper whispers to another, "Jiminy is strong my brother, the infidel will never break him!"
Bug: Steeeeeeeeeve, the Stevester, the Steve-man makin' copies. Steve-a-ling-a-ding-dong.
The police interrigation was not going well, untill they thretened to pull hoppys legs off with a forklift.
The gang then realized they would never have enough melted chocolate, and gave up on their exotic candy business dreams.
Tom: "When we built this aquarium I thought we would fill it with tropical fish. What the heck is this?"
Theodore: "It's a fish."
Tom: "But it doesn't look like a fish..."
Theodore: "Different kind of fish..."
Tom: "OK, wiseguy. What kind of fish is it?"
Theodore: "The kind you don't f**k with, that's what kind!"
"Don't mind him, he'll go away in about a minute or so."
The new windowcleaner took a lot of getting used to.....
The Cricket In Times Square proved to be a bit bigger than people expected.