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Other Topics => Off Topic Discussion => Weird News Stories => Topic started by: trekgeezer on May 16, 2008, 12:42:55 PM

Title: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: trekgeezer on May 16, 2008, 12:42:55 PM
Talk about your desperate measures!

http://www.kstp.com/article/stories/S446543.shtml?cat=1
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: Jack on May 16, 2008, 01:38:49 PM
If he wanted to kill himself before, I can only imagine how he'll feel now that he's gnawed to a pulp.
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: AndyC on May 16, 2008, 03:38:26 PM
Quote from: Jack on May 16, 2008, 01:38:49 PM
If he wanted to kill himself before, I can only imagine how he'll feel now that he's gnawed to a pulp.

You'd be surprised how often a botched suicide attempt can make things a hundred times worse for somebody. Reminds me of the guy who survived jumping off a dam, but with total paralysis from the neck down. And the guy who put a shotgun under his chin and only succeeded in blowing half his face off.

But diving into a wood chipper? How could anybody want to go out that way? Maybe he figured on being pulverized too quickly and completely to feel anything. Can't imagine much premeditation went into it. He must have seen the thing and had a light bulb turn on.
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: Torgo on May 16, 2008, 04:41:22 PM
This article makes me want to go and watch Fargo again.

(http://blogs.mt.bravotv.com/_mt/ruckersblog/_blogImages/2006/07/ruckerblog_fargo_332x219.jpg)
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: BoyScoutKevin on May 18, 2008, 02:48:11 PM
This guy has seen too many films. I believe there was also an episode of "Friday the 13th" that featured wood chipper, but this one was a cursed wood chipper.
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: Patient7 on May 18, 2008, 06:47:16 PM
I think this guy wanted to go out in the most gruesome way possible, however it has been known that a failed suicide attempt can completley change a person's outlook on life, it may be a blessing in disguise for this man, besides the bodily dismemberment.
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: AndyC on May 18, 2008, 07:11:01 PM
Quote from: Patient7 on May 18, 2008, 06:47:16 PM
I think this guy wanted to go out in the most gruesome way possible, however it has been known that a failed suicide attempt can completley change a person's outlook on life, it may be a blessing in disguise for this man, besides the bodily dismemberment.

Indeed, the quadraplegic and the guy who blew half his face off were both happier (for lack of a better word) when I read about them. They were interviewed years after the fact, of course.
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: Patient7 on May 19, 2008, 05:22:30 PM
Quote from: AndyC on May 18, 2008, 07:11:01 PM
Indeed, the quadraplegic and the guy who blew half his face off were both happier

Honestly, before I read the rest of this I thought you were insulting me.  Astounding how out of conext things can be taken before a person finishes. :question:
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: AndyC on May 19, 2008, 05:52:47 PM
 :bouncegiggle: Yeah, just reading that sentence on its own, it does sound like a wisecrack.

Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: Sister Grace on May 19, 2008, 06:05:31 PM
Ok, so far this year we've had woodchipper-man and toilet seat lady...what's next?
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: Patient7 on May 20, 2008, 04:58:40 PM
Quote from: SisterGrace on May 19, 2008, 06:05:31 PM
Ok, so far this year we've had woodchipper-man and toilet seat lady...what's next?

Maybe some dumbass who tried to cut himself in half on a tblesa and went legs first.*

Saw it on South Park all right.
Title: Re: Man attempts suicide by diving into wood chipper.
Post by: SynapticBoomstick on May 29, 2008, 12:50:00 AM
"Police believe it may have been a suicide attempt."

What else could it have been? I can't even comprehend how anybody could step outside and head out knowing what they were about to do :buggedout: