http://vandonovan.livejournal.com/1088311.html (http://vandonovan.livejournal.com/1088311.html)
Eeek!!
Won't somebody think of the adjectives !!!
...
The bit about the pubes was quite funny...
ACK! I'm being prose-raped! Help me! Help me!
"Her hair...was the colour of a leopard's tongue."
"Her tongue was a ferret, an anemone, a fox caught in the teeth of a tiger."
She's in a bad way. I recommend a trip to the doctors. I can not read any more though.
On the subject of similes, a website has some bad similes that have been used in student essays apparently (I dunno for sure though). My favourites are "John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met." and "He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree."
Here's the site: - http://mistupid.com/people/page027.htm
Quote from: Wag on March 27, 2009, 03:56:54 AM
On the subject of similes, a website has some bad similes that have been used in student essays apparently (I dunno for sure though). My favourites are "John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met." and "He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree."
Here's the site: - http://mistupid.com/people/page027.htm
Some of those are excellent!
""Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving like a college freshman on $1-a-beer night."
"She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up."
I didn't know that oiled mahogany and Leopard's tongue are the same colour ?!
Oh God, I read every word! That's quite awful/hilarious...mostly awful. As a fan of Ray Bradbury I love me some metaphor and simile, but GEE WHIZZ, that's atrocious.
Did anyone notice that the character that was gazing upon the Metaphor Lady was named Spikenard?
Quote from: Pilgermann on March 27, 2009, 10:45:13 AM
Oh God, I read every word! That's quite awful/hilarious...mostly awful. As a fan of Ray Bradbury I love me some metaphor and simile, but GEE WHIZZ, that's atrocious.
Did anyone notice that the character that was gazing upon the Metaphor Lady was named Spikenard?
That was one of the first things I noticed, and I almost thought it was a comedy based on that.
Quote from: Joe the Destroyer on March 28, 2009, 03:07:24 AM
Quote from: Pilgermann on March 27, 2009, 10:45:13 AM
Oh God, I read every word! That's quite awful/hilarious...mostly awful. As a fan of Ray Bradbury I love me some metaphor and simile, but GEE WHIZZ, that's atrocious.
Did anyone notice that the character that was gazing upon the Metaphor Lady was named Spikenard?
That was one of the first things I noticed, and I almost thought it was a comedy based on that.
I don't want this guy to write jokes...
:bluesad: