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Movies => Bad Movies => Topic started by: BTM on April 08, 2009, 01:01:50 PM

Title: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: BTM on April 08, 2009, 01:01:50 PM
I know you've talked about this a little bit before, but I just saw this a few days ago and had to post about it.

I have to ask, how in the WORLD did they manage to screw this film up so badly??!? 

I've played the games, the story is simple enough: Max Payne is a detective with uncannily fast reflexes (they call it "Bullet Time" in the game).  His wife and daughter are killed in what seems to be just a random home invasion by two addicts strung out on Valkyrie, the newest drug to hit the streets.  As he investigates deeper, he stumbles onto a bank heist, mob war, and a conspiracy involving some major corporation (cause, we all know big corporations are always evil.)

Yeah, it's not the greatest plot in the world, but it was kickass for the game.

The movie though commits the one unforgivable sin of movies... you can get away with a low budget, bad acting, cheesy special effects all that, but the one thing we don't forgive is being BORING.  And that, for the most part, is what this movie is.  BORING. 

We start off with a small action scene, then switch to long bouts of Max roaming around doing nothing but mumbling to people. It takes the film about 45 minutes before we get to our first shoot out. 

I don't know... I just can't see how they messed this film up so badly.  I wanted this to be a good movie, cause the game is awesome, and it should have easily made a decent (if not exactly earth shattering) film, but no, all that went down the toilet, and I'm not sure really who's to blame.

And what is UP with the freaking demonic beings?!?  Those are NOT in the game.  Yes, in the game Max (while drugged) has several nightmarish dream sequences which were pretty damn scary, but this movie just seemed to throw these things in just to have something cool to put in the trailer and mislead the audience into thinking the film would be about something it's not.

To me, they should have done one of two things: either change the story from the get go so it actually HAD a supernatural element or leave out the demonic beings altogether.   

Oh, yeah, and if you stick through past the credits, you'll get a scene that sets it up for a sequel.  Talk about wishful thinking.
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: WingedSerpent on April 08, 2009, 04:52:23 PM
I saw this in the theaters with a couple of friends when it came out.  It's one of those bad movies thats not even fun to make fun of, or enjoy in a bad movie kind of way.  Parts of it looked like it was trying to be Constintine 2.

The final confrontation was just increibly anti-climatic to me. 

I've told people I see Video-Game based movies now in the same position comic book movies were in in the early 90's.  Most are just schloky and poorly done.  They have yet to really have a Spider-Man, Iron Man, or Dark Knight to really show them that it can be done well.
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: sandbagger on April 08, 2009, 10:00:27 PM
All they had to do was adapt the story from the game to a movie. If they had done that they'd have had a fast paced gritty urban crime drama. Anh! Who wants that?  :lookingup:
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: Joe the Destroyer on April 09, 2009, 06:06:12 AM
My fiancee and I sat through this movie.  She liked it, I didn't.  I told her I didn't mind if the story was different from the game, but at very least make it feel like the game.  And that's just the thing, it didn't feel at all like a Max Payne movie.  I mean, the game borrowed a lot from American hardboiled detective stories, film noir, and John Woo action films.  How the flying frick did they not manage to include any of that in the film?  Were they too afraid that people would think it's a Sin City knock off if they did? 

You'd think a movie based on an action game would have a lot of action in it, but this film just about put me to sleep.  Honestly, along with any name there usually comes a set of standards, and I think Hollywood tends to forget this sometimes (Godzilla, anyone?).  All that's usually asked is that you stick to the standards, or just change the name.  I think I would have enjoyed this movie more if it weren't called Max Payne.  I know that sounds crazy, but why make a Max Payne movie that feels nothing like the game to begin with?  Why even bother keeping the name on board? 
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: Neville on April 10, 2009, 04:58:23 AM
I hated every minute of it. But I did laugh once, when Payne does the drugs for the grand finale. He just pops the pills or whatever, and then he lets out a growl just like Godzilla LOL
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: BTM on April 10, 2009, 08:29:14 AM
Quote from: Neville on April 10, 2009, 04:58:23 AM
I hated every minute of it. But I did laugh once, when Payne does the drugs for the grand finale. He just pops the pills or whatever, and then he lets out a growl just like Godzilla LOL

Must be good stuff to, cause he suddenly doesn't have any ill effects after being in FREEZING cold water for God knows how long.
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: kakihara on April 10, 2009, 01:40:37 PM
ok,ok,ok...i have been tempted to post about this movie many times, but its hard for me to not go off on a rant. here goes, ill try to keep it clean. first of all, the max payne story is special to me. ive never been much of a gamer, ive only played a handfull of games that i actually enjoyed or even wanted to complete. m/p is one of them. back in the day i was trusting enough to let an irresponsible friend rent m/p on my blockbuster account. the game was never returned on time and the late charges were more than what a new copy would cost. so i ended up with a game that i didnt want. i had it for a while but never felt like playing it. one day in january when it was cold and rainy and miserable outside i ended up playing it out of boredom. i was insantly hooked. it wasnt the gun play it was the story that drew me in, it wasnt that the story was really good and original, i think it was the way it was presented. it was dark and gritty. i loved the way it was narrated by max. it was perfect, for me anyway. i called in to work for a week straight for that freakin game. i didnt sleep or eat because i was so caught up in the story. at the time there was really nasty wheather outside just like in the game. i remember walking the corner store at various times to buy red-bulls and runts between chapters in the game. i loved that game, the music, the characters, the monologue, the violence and the gun play was satisfying (dual ingrams!) . i still have it. every 4 years or so i play through it all over again. the second game didnt quite do it for me like the first.  so, after hearing about the movie and espescially seeing the preveiws i was beside myself with anticipation. i expected the movie to be a piece of crap but deep down i had some hope. well, the movie was crap. it could have been worse, in fact, if it was called something else besides m/p, it wouldnt have been a bad movie. it was long and for the most part, boring and anti-climactic. this movie should have been gritty, dark and violent. (sigh). mark wahlberg. mark "marky-mark" fricken' wahlberg? the devil-thingys? the marilyn manson song? (insert profanity here)
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: MilkManPictures on April 10, 2009, 03:33:53 PM
Man I loved the first video game! The trailer looked promising but this movie just sucked. I think Wahlberg was a good choice but they just really screwed the pooch on this film. A good video game is not a script...
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: Cthulhu on April 13, 2009, 05:03:02 AM
I finished the game a few days ago...man, it had potential. The movie could've been good.
Haven't seen it myself, but I've read some reviews. What the hell? Winged demons? Pg-13? Mark Wahlberg? Meh..The game was dark, violent, action packed, had a noir feel to it. The movie is just a cash in.
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: InformationGeek on April 13, 2009, 08:57:28 PM
Oh yeah, I remember hearing about this film in commericals.  It didn't look appealing to me at all and after hearing it was based off a video game, I lost all interest in it.  There are only rare few moments when a video game can translate into a sort of or ok decent movie.  Examples include Silent Hill, the first Tomb Raider, and Resident Evil.  Everything else is just crap.
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: MilkManPictures on April 13, 2009, 11:04:39 PM
I liked the 2nd Tomb Raider...
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: dean on April 14, 2009, 09:23:09 AM

I thought the idea of the Valkyrie's was a cool idea that they just didn't explore enough.

It was a cool looking and good alternative to the out and out rampant satanism in the game [from what I remember at least]  This way it gave the filmmakers the way of getting some crazy cult like members wreaking havoc without having to worry as much about the censors tearing them apart for extreme religious themes

But that being said, they deliberately went for a PG13 and it ruined the film.  In order for this film to work it needed to be much more violent and scary: In the game some of the best bits were the 'i'm going to eat your flesh' crazy wacked out moments and we just got none of it here. 

Like someone else said: it was just alot of Payne whining and wandering around: just so boring they even made a sex scene useless.

I also noticed a difference between the trailer and the actual movie: More blood in the trailer which didn't include.  I wonder what the 'uncut' dvd version is like, though I can't imagine they can improve such a bad plot...
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: Torgo on April 15, 2009, 10:42:44 PM
A friend of mine let me borrow this a little while back.  I can honestly say that for most of the movie I couldn't really tell you who was doing what and why.  Confusing to the nth degree.

Not to mention that I thought that it was awful top of that.   
Title: Re: Max Payne, dear God....
Post by: Terf on May 22, 2009, 12:46:34 AM
It couldn't decide if it wanted to be PG-13 or R. Not so great. I thought the shootout in the office was the best part. :P