This probably doesn't have anything to do with bad movies, except that I could probably see someone making a movie about this. My brother is really into Starcraft, and he found this message a while back, and I decided to keep it for obvious reasons. Just figured I'd share it here as an example of perhaps a future maker of b-movies. Anyway, remove your sanity with this:
I gave you a warning. This has NOTHING to do with SC. If you wanna
read something aboot SC, leave now.
So anyway, we all die, right?
And many wonder what will happen
after they die. Well, I already know.
When I die (and assuming God is
real and permits it),
I am going to have my soul placed in a skeleton,
and I will become the Infinite Skeleton.
Yes, that's right. I will be
a walking, talking, fire breathing skeleton
(if he lets me). I will fight all sorts of crimes!
I will carry with me a sword to which
NO other lifeform can carry!
If I see someone stealing gum, SLICE! He
gets it in the face! This is how severe I will be towards
wrong-doers. I won't be like other super heroes
and put you in jail, NO! You will eat sword, queer!
And if I should happen to get ripped apart, you better run, fool!
Cuz I am gonna put my skeleton-self
back together and slice you
in half wit' a quickness! But don't worry,
I am not out looking for trouble.
I will visit kids in the hospital,
host fund raisers, and such and such.
So watch out! The future in
skeletal crime fighting is coming in aboot 60 years.
Send that to Lloyd Kaufman...
But an easy way to kill this "Infinite Skeleton"...CREMATION.
Man, that's funny. I especially enjoyed the part about hosting fundraisers.
And I suppose there's nothing better for a kid in the hospital than a visit from a homicidal sword-weilding haunted skeleton.
This guy either has a delightfully warped sense of humour, or he's a complete and total nut.
Well, I don't know. A regenerating skeleton may be sort of comforting to a kid in a hospital.
"Look, you may die. But you'll be able to do this!"
Or is that in poor taste?
I think the mage in Warcraft can beat the skeletons. ;)
An even easier way to kill an "Infinite Skeleton", turn a pack of dogs loose on him. Dogs just love to chew on and bury old bones. Plus, it's sure to result in sure fire "komedy" when Troma makes the movie...