It is just as it sounds. Sometimes watching a movie and you'll hear some of the dumbest things ever said. It'll either be so bad that it is it good or it'll just leave you scratching your head in disbelief. We all know the famous lines: "Garbage Day!" "Oh my GOOOOODDDDD!" or even this delightful exchange between people in Shark Attack 3:
Girl: I'm tired.
Guy: Yeah, me too. But you know I'm really wired. What do you say I... take you home and eat your p***y?'
So basically, can you guys think of any other dialogue or lines from a movie that is ridiculous, stupid, bad, weird, unusual, or insane?
Here's a personal favorite from Samurai Cop. What kind of nurse talks like this outside of a porno? Or was this a scene from a porno that got mixed in? *Shivers*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6gk04xzN3U
from Howard the Duck:" Okay, no more Mr. Nice Duck!"
from Manos:"I am Torgo, I take care of the place while the Master is away."
"There's a dead chick in my bed and the world's gone mad!"--Hell Night :bouncegiggle:
"You created it all so you could be immortal, why?"
"To live forever!"
-House of the Dead
I was so inspired by this piece of insipid dialogue, I made this motivational poster...
(http://i247.photobucket.com/albums/gg144/DKaidian/humor/hotdimmortalmotivator.jpg)
"Signal blocked? What does that mean?"
"It means someone's blocked the signal." - STEEL TRAP
"Their minds are dead."
"What do you mean by that?"
"Their minds are dead." - MAGNUM FORCE
"How long is your phallus?"
"My what?"
"Your cock. You can usually tell by the size
of a man's nose. Or the length and thickness of his thumbs.
I always look for a man with a prominent nose and long, thick thumbs."
"Baby, my nose may not be too prominent...
...but I've got two of the longest, thickest thumbs." - SHAFT IN AFRICA
From Pod People :buggedout:-Well?
(gives tho okay hand sign) it stinks!
Trumpy, you can do magic :buggedout:
Phantasm (1979)
"There's a door down here, and I bet there's something behind it."
This amazingly mixed metaphor is my favorite: "I'll take you places where the hand of man has not yet set foot!" --Erik Estrada in CAGED FURY
From the Pumaman- "You are the pumaman" okay, a guy just threw you out a window and you should trust him when he saids your a superhero? :teddyr:
Michael Moriarty in "The Stuff"
"Everybody has to eat shaving cream once in a while."
HUH????
(http://www.zone-sf.com/images/stuff1.jpg)
"You know what happens to a toad when it gets struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else!"
-X-Men
Er... okay.
Quote from: InformationGeek on February 16, 2010, 05:48:35 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6gk04xzN3U
Holy cow!!!! That's bad! I think what makes it porn-like is the really bad acting. This sort of dialogue could have worked to great effect with some good actors.
Here's a really bad line from
Anaconda 3: The Offspring - it's so ridiculous, it's great:
Hammett (David Hasselhof): "Where there's blood, there's more blood."
I love this exchange from THE COWBOY KILLER:
"We'll teach that Cowboy not to pay his cable bill!"
"Yeah!! Let's set fire to his horse and EAT IT!!!"
From: In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale
The 'heroes' are taken prisoner and are chained by their wrists to a dungeon wall. In a lull and out of the blue, one of them turns to a cute blonde girl chained next to him and says in a mild voice, "Where are you from?" Upon which one of us watching invariably adds: "What's your sign? Come here often?"
Also the oft-quoted: "The answer? SEAWEED!"..."Why do I know this? Because I am KING!!"
Good times. :teddyr:
From Prince of Space- Your weapons are useless against me!; I like it very much!
Night of the Living Dead Remake
"What in the name of Jupiter's balls are you doing out here alone little lady?"
- Hick Zombie Hunter at the End to Barbara
From Flesh For Frankenstein:
"To know death, Otto, you have to f**k life... in the gall bladder."
From A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child
"Faster than a bastard maniac! More powerful than a loco-madman! It's....Super Freddy!
"Stop that moving mound of moss !"
Blues Brother 2000
"YOU GONNA BE THE WORM FACE!!!"
--Squirm
Phantasm
"I know you're not going to believe this, but these things were here, right in the garage, and they were going to get me!"
The Blob
"Doc Hallen is dead, and he was killed by some sort of a monster!"
(When the plot calls for the adults to disbelieve you, it's best to shed a few IQ points and explain things in the most childish way possible.)
Also from The Blob
"I don't like William." Actually, the whole exchange between Jane and her little brother, but the topper was him asking if he can name a dog William, then immediately deciding against it. WTF?
"Time for go to bed"
Quote from: Newt on February 20, 2010, 08:31:23 AM
From: In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale
You know, I've never actually sat through that one. Is it at least tolerable in a "so bad it's good" way?
I mean, usually I see just about anything with Jason Statham kicking ass, but as the film Chaos proved, sometimes not even that's enough. (Course, might have helped if JS was actually IN the move for more than thirty minutes...)
Pretty much anything from the movie R.O.T.O.R., but fast forward to around 5:35 in the video and check out the business meeting.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nx0-9hX9xEw&feature=related
Is there some good vibration to its molecular tonality you can utilize?
Quote from: Jack on May 25, 2010, 07:08:16 AM
Pretty much anything from the movie R.O.T.O.R.
The best for me is right at the beginning, when the doctor is giving his account to the cops: "The fresh October morning breeze blew across the ranch, the cattle were coming in for the morning feeding, and the buttery morning sun painted a golden glow through the ranch house windows."
Quote from: BTM on May 25, 2010, 12:29:02 AM
You know, I've never actually sat through that one. Is it at least tolerable in a "so bad it's good" way?
If it is kickass action you are looking for, it might come off a bit slow in the beginning. JS is put in a positon where he needs to act...maybe he should stick to bashing heads. The battle scenes are good: you can SEE where the money was spent (it was Boll's biggest budget as of that date). Ron Perlman was under-used (IMO); Matthew Lillard chewed up the scenery nicely and Ray Liotta's fight scenes are a giggle.
It has its moments. I first saw it at the Toronto After Dark film festival - its Canadian premiere - and it was a blast sitting with an audience of people who were 'into' this type of movie. You
know what is coming - I think every
cliché associated with the genre is represented - you could feel the anticipation build as we awaited the 'punch'. Then, when it comes, it is dealt with a very light hand and everyone laughed in appreciation (sounded like delight to me). This was an audience that had a significant component of people who had come to ridicule - so the movie came off fairly well, I think. The experience was a hoot: it is very susceptible to riffing. :wink:
I swear the actors were having fun with it. That always makes a movie more fun for me.
I kind of love In The Name of the King; so much unintentional hilarity! :teddyr:
For ridiculous lines it's pretty hard to top Touch of Satan:
"This is where the fish lives."
Whaaa?
Quote from: ChaosTheory on May 25, 2010, 07:46:04 PM
I kind of love In The Name of the King; so much unintentional hilarity! :teddyr:
As do I! Karma to you for that. :thumbup:
Quote from: ChaosTheory on May 25, 2010, 07:46:04 PM
For ridiculous lines it's pretty hard to top Touch of Satan:
"This is where the fish lives."
Whaaa?
I just watched the MST3K version of that the other night. :bouncegiggle:
From NINJA BACHELOR PARTY:
Clarence: "This ninja training has broken my addiction! I don't crave Robutussin at all!"
Dr. Death: "Is that a pharmacy?"
Clarence: "WHERE???"
I'm going to cheat a little with this one since it isn't a movie, but it still gets me as the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.
From Power Rangers Turbo:
"The evil pizzas were no match for a simple stoplight!"
Does not make sense when viewing the episode as well.
Freddy (making kid jump in video game): BOING BOING BOING BOING BOING!!!
Ran (1985) - "Man is born crying. When he has cried enough, he dies."
There's some over-the-top Nietzschean existential nihilism for you.