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Movies => Bad Movies => Topic started by: InformationGeek on August 06, 2010, 09:19:07 AM

Title: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: InformationGeek on August 06, 2010, 09:19:07 AM
I've seen the phrase, worst movie ever, uttered tons of times over my life.  My friends use it in context with any of the recent parody movies (Epic Movie, Meet Spartans), TV shows have brought it up, and forums all over the Internet have topics on the subject (We've had more than one like this in the past).  So I got to thinking, we maybe using the phrase or declaring such such the worst films ever, but have we ever taken the time to determine what it takes to be the worst film ever?

What has to present in the film to make it bad?  What has to fail?  What kind of tone needs to be there?  There are so many variables that it is really thought provoking.  I've come to the conclusion what is needed for a film to be considered the worst of all times.  It is rather simple and pretty sure most would agree, the film has to fail at everything there is with a film in general.  Bad characters, bad story, bad dialogue, bad effects, bad cinematography, bad film quality, bad sound, and overall, it is unengaging or boring.

The film that I consider the worst is Monster A-Go Go and it meets all of these qualifications.  It represents the lowest a film, no matter what genre, can reach.

So, that's what I consider is needed to be considered the worst film of all times.  What about you guys?  What does it take, in your mind, for a film to be considered the worst ever?
Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: Cthulhu on August 06, 2010, 12:22:18 PM
Indeed, everything needs to fail. When you're watching a movie which can be called "the worst movie of all time" there is desperation, and the smell of death in the air.
You call Monster a Go-go the worst movie ever made.
Come.
Open your eyes.
See.

http://stagevu.com/video/uwhljvebfurg (http://stagevu.com/video/uwhljvebfurg)

Be careful, my child. For this is not meant to be seen by mortal eyes.
Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: JaseSF on August 06, 2010, 12:41:50 PM
I suspect one could do a list of the most boring, awfulest films ever except with truly boring films, in many cases people won't care enough to remember the names. Worst movie ever - it's likely one not seen or remembered by many...
Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: The Burgomaster on August 06, 2010, 12:46:14 PM
For me, the number one factor is when a movie is boring.  PLAN 9 is terrible, but it's really fun to watch over and over again.  Same with MANOS and many others that often come up in these discussions.  My all-time worst is CURSE OF THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN, which, in addition to being full of bad acting, bad dialogue, bad editing . . . bad everything . . . it is dreadfully dull. 
Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: zombie no.one on August 06, 2010, 01:42:51 PM
I think there's a paradox here , namely that a mediocre film is worse than a bad one. 
Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: judge death on August 06, 2010, 05:49:41 PM
Well, in all seriousness for a minute, I'd day that the worst movie ever was a movie that actually caused  harm, injury or death to people. THAT is the worst movie ever made, not just a movie that made the viewers disgusted, feel offended or want to barf.

Also to be the worst movie ever made I'd say it had to be made with the intend of doing harm to people.

Under those criteria then, I'd say that in all seriousness and putting aside the MST3K stuff, the worst movie EVER was likely "The eternal jew", made by the nazi regime to incite anti jewish passions and pave the way to the holocaust.

That, IMO, is truly the worst movie EVER made, with "triumph of the will" running a close second as it was meant to pave the way to massive, aggressive war.

"Birth of a nation" caused a lot of harm and some deaths, but giving it the benefit of the doubt I can say that maybe the makers did not actually foresee that lynchings and physical attacks would occur because movies were still in their infancy and maybe they didn't know the kind of power they could have.

So, if you want to take a serious stand on worst movie ever made, look for the one that was made with malicious intent and has the most blood dripping off it.

On a lighter vein, Good god could a movie ever be stupider or have a worse ending than
"Monster a Go Go" ?



Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: Corey on August 06, 2010, 06:40:45 PM
I spend my free time discovering great new B-movies to buy and add to my collection. I found a movie called "Return to Frogtown", it made my top five and i instantly had to have it. i liked it so much that i did research to find any other sequels or such. this led me to discover the most horrific thing to happen to dvd. the only way to get this movie is on some guy's site who wrote, directed, and stared in it. (he even named his made up style of acting!) my friend's, whom have seen all kinds of awful movies with be, (even after I warned them) were brought to tears and not haha comedy tears. They were mad at me for showing them the movie! And since then I have refused to ever watch or show the movie again

Long story short: "Max Hell: Toad Warrior" is the worst movie I have ever seen. And, I suggest no-one to ever make attempts to find and/or watch this movie. Trust me; it will only make you mad.

....I will never buy another one of his movies, nor will i give anyone his name. But, i am the proud owner of what could possibly be the the worst movie ever made.
Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: Chainsawmidget on August 06, 2010, 07:13:55 PM
Once you hit rock bottom, there's essentially three levels.

So Bad It's Good.  The reason most of us are here.  The movie that lack any kind of technical skill, acting, special effects, or what have you, that still have a certain charm that makes them worth seeing.  This is Ed Wood Territory here. 


the non memorable  You forget anything about this movie fifteen minutes after it's over, if you haven't gotten bored and changed the channel.  You're probably going to end up renting it again at some point because you completley forgot that you've seen it... and even then you might not remember until halfway through.  This is the realm of Sci-Fi original movies and 80s generic slashers. 

So bad it hurts  This movie is horrible in ways that can't even entertain you.  There's no charm, and no style.  These movies so lack in anything resembling entertainment that they hurt you and you only wish you knew a way of hurting them back.  This is Coleman Francis territory.  And THIS is the worst of the worst.  It's not a movie that you can instantly forget, but one you really wish you could. 
Title: Re: What Does It Take to Be the Very Worst?
Post by: Andrew on August 06, 2010, 08:41:07 PM
Quote from: Corey on August 06, 2010, 06:40:45 PM
I spend my free time discovering great new B-movies to buy and add to my collection. I found a movie called "Return to Frogtown", it made my top five and i instantly had to have it. i liked it so much that i did research to find any other sequels or such. this led me to discover the most horrific thing to happen to dvd. the only way to get this movie is on some guy's site who wrote, directed, and stared in it. (he even named his made up style of acting!) my friend's, whom have seen all kinds of awful movies with be, (even after I warned them) were brought to tears and not haha comedy tears. They were mad at me for showing them the movie! And since then I have refused to ever watch or show the movie again

Long story short: "Max Hell: Toad Warrior" is the worst movie I have ever seen. And, I suggest no-one to ever make attempts to find and/or watch this movie. Trust me; it will only make you mad.

....I will never buy another one of his movies, nor will i give anyone his name. But, i am the proud owner of what could possibly be the the worst movie ever made.

Donald G. Jackson and his idea of "Zen Filmmaking."  Though I think you are referring to Scott Shaw, the actor playing Max Hell.  I've not seen "Max Hell Frog Warrior," but have seen the other three films.  The first, "Hell Comes to Frogtown" is a classic.  "Return to Frogtown" has some charm, and "Toad Warrior" is just awful.  If the fourth film is worse than the third, then I can understand it being the pinnacle of what you consider the very bottom.