(NOTE: this will be a bit long, and contains a lot of stuff about me rambling on about my personal problems. Skip this post if that sounds boring.)
Mike, here, popping in again to say, "Hi!" and stuff. Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and all that. Mine had a couple of bumps in it. In addition to my various legal junk, my mom is now p**sed off at me and my sister (well, I guess less me now than her) because she found out we've been talking to my stepdad (well, ex stepdad since they got divorced about a year ago.)
I don't know why this is just coming up now, but basically, she's still bitter and angry about the divorce (understandable), and feels that by us talking to him that we "endorse" what he did to her, namely leaving her for another woman. (Course, I'm pretty sure if he never called or talked to us, she'd be all p**sed off because he "...doesn't care about us kids.") Among other things, mom says she feels that she can't "move on" because she's been told (correctly or not, I don't know) by a lawyer that if Jim ever found out she was dating/cohabitating with someone she'd lose the alimony she's gaining and couldn't support herself.
So, I get it, she feels it unfair that Jim is now with his (and I quote) "Pot smoking whore girlfriend" but she can't have a life cause she'll get punished. Pesonally, I don't know, to me, if my stepdad wanted to stop alimony payments he would have challenged it when they got divorced in the first place.
I don't really know what she expects us kids to do: ignore Jim completely? Call him and cuss him out? Set fire to his home?
Because I currently live with my mom, I'm pretty much a captive audience to all her bitter diatribes. I'm a bit of a sensitive person (maybe too much so). I don't like having angry people around me, and everytime she's in the room with me I feel she's going to start griping about something.
Don't get me wrong, I don't blame her for being angry, throwing away 23 years of marriage is a tough thing, especially since he lied to her about seeing someone, BUT, the fact is, mom hasn't faced up to her part in the breakup of their marriage either. Years ago while I was still with them my parents decided to become swingers. They didn't come out and tell me this, but it was rather obvious.
I mean, to me, when you introduce that element into your marriage, you shouldn't be surprised when your spouse finds something he thinks is better than you.
But, I doubt it would be wise to point this out to her, mom's never been the best at conceding her own mistakes.
So, that's the home situation. I'm still looking for another place to live (I was told by the police I had to move, least I get charged), but, so far, most of the places I've tried want six month/one year leases. If I KNEW I was going to be around that long, that'd be fine, but the fact is I don't know what will happen in February, whether it will be parole or prison.
I suppose on that up side, I've managed to get a part time job. I usually only work about three days a week, but I've been able to snag a few more here and there from co-workers.
Been kind of depressed and lonely lately. I miss being online, miss having people to share silly thoughts and things of my life with.
Anyway, thanks for reading. Hope you guys are doing okay!
okay that sounds pretty bad, hope you manage to sort things out or at least find some equilibrium. best of luck. I know families can be the most difficult thing. you can't choose them!
That is quite the analysis, BTM. Welcome back on BTW, BTM! (just had to type that.)
I know you aren't asking for advice, so won't give any. I suppose it is a good thing at least to comprehend the situation, however trying it can be sometimes. We wish you patience and humanity and when necessary, forbearance through it all.
Good luck with it all, Mike. You remain in our thoughts here on this end.
Sounds like you are (mostly) keeping a clear head and at least treading water....that's as good a first step as any. :thumbup:
Glad to hear you're hanging in there! Just remember, when this all blows over you'll have lots of tough guy livin' stories for all the ladies to gather round and listen to.