Many movies have been called "The Worst Film of All Time."
Many of those movies are actually entertaining, in their own way.
The world's worst movie shouldn't be entertaining. I want to know what movies are so bad they cannot be considered entertaining under any circumstances; I want to know of an essentially unwatchable movie.
Any suggestions?
Two that come to mind are:
* DUNE (1984) - I never wanted to get out of a movie theater so bad as when I went to see this boring mess.
* WIRED (1989) - I actually had a headache by the end of this movie.
The Sinful Dwarf (1973) (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0070696/) is so tasteless and ugly that I had to fast forward through a lot of it. But hey, other people might like it. Weird people.
I have two in mind:
Disaster Movie: It's a film so devoded of humor and most importantly, entertainment, that the movie becomes unbearable, pain inducing (I got a headache from watching it), and intolerable to sit through.
After Last Season: While certianly has many moments that can be riffable, the excruciating slow pace and the fact that nothing is happening in the film makes this near impossible to watch without wanting to give up a quarter of the way into it.
Midnight Mass
(http://i160.photobucket.com/albums/t176/Tahrgat/thumb_midnightmass.jpg)
The never ending cliche ride of Independance Day, the dog jumping to safety in the tunnel explosion did it for me. And that was on video!
Pretty much anything released after 1989 sucks if you ask me. I can watch Maniac (1980) a million times, but it's the big budget newer movies that I find truly offensive in their mediocrity.
(http://images.moviepostershop.com/going-ape-movie-poster-1981-1020240952.jpg)
(http://i.ebayimg.com/t/TELEPHONE-MOVIE-POSTER-VIDEO-27x40-WHOOPI-GOLDBERG-/00/$(KGrHqZ,!hgE1f7fKgjDBNjo+IgV!Q~~0_3.JPG)
I have one: Murder by Television, a 30's "thriller".
At the beginning of the movie a TV company asks Bela Lugosi to steal a new invention by a noted Television inventor he works for. The inventor makes a broadcast, winds up dead, and then...nothing really happens. Everyone wanders around the house for awhile, until someone kills Lugosi's character. Then Lugosi steps into the room, tells everyone that the dead guy was his evil twin, and proceeds to explain what happened to the inventor. Apparently someone added a new part to his television camera, which produced a ray of a particular frequency,"which is the death ray." To activate the devic,e someone called their office, which caused a rube golberg machine to work, which started the ray. Dumb, Dumb and dull.
These are a few very unenjoyable experiences that come to mind:
-Zombie Strippers
-Nightmare on Elm Street part 2
-Love me if You Dare
-Every Scary Movie film and the others of its kind (Epic Movie etc.)
10. The Heartbreak Kid (2007)
9. Epic Movie (2007)
8. Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)
7. Thomas and the Magic Railroad (2000)
6. The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (1987)
5. Tom & Jerry: The Movie (1992)
4. Space Jam (1996)
3. Drive (2011)
2. The Dark Knight (2008)
1. Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon (2011)
Quote from: Kaseykockroach on February 22, 2012, 03:51:49 PM
4. Space Jam (1996)
3. Drive (2011)
2. The Dark Knight (2008)
Are you .. are you okay? Do you need anything?
We're all worried.
Andy Warhol's SLEEP and EMPIRE. Wouldn't watch them on a dare, and they weren't intended to be watchable.
I love part 1 and 4, but hate The Toxic Avenger Part 2 and 3. Even the creator Lloyd Kaufman agrees.
(http://i160.photobucket.com/albums/t176/Tahrgat/th_toxicavenger2.jpg) (http://s160.photobucket.com/albums/t176/Tahrgat/?action=view¤t=toxicavenger2.jpg)
(http://i160.photobucket.com/albums/t176/Tahrgat/th_the-toxic-avenger-3.jpg) (http://s160.photobucket.com/albums/t176/Tahrgat/?action=view¤t=the-toxic-avenger-3.jpg)
DARK FIELDS (2006)-Dam-this movie is stupid,amatuerish, ultra low budget trash. Which doesn't make a movie unwatchable to me-what is unforgivable is it's mindnumbly BORING. Dull beyond dull. Some kids in a car break down,get stranded at an old farm-where some guy with a bad wig offs them in unimaginative ways. Of course it's a direct to video piece of s**t-and even though I got it for free,I still feel cheated.
Bucky Larson
Quote from: CarlinBrock on February 22, 2012, 04:55:38 PM
Quote from: Kaseykockroach on February 22, 2012, 03:51:49 PM
4. Space Jam (1996)
3. Drive (2011)
2. The Dark Knight (2008)
Are you .. are you okay? Do you need anything?
We're all worried.
Oh that just Kasey being Kasey. Don't mind him.
Thinking about movies that are unwatchable: The Wild World of Batwoman and Zaat spring to mind. Thank God I watched that with the Mystery Science Theater guys. I could never make it through otherwise.
For an interesting example not from me, my dad tried sitting through Manos: The Hands of Fate with the MST3K guys, but said to turn off after a while because he couldn't make through even with the commentary.
I will discount things that don't really qualify as movies (like The Jar), or movies that I actually couldn't get through (like Exterminator 2). I am only counting movies that I finished.
Suspiria. The hardest slog through a movie I've ever had. It was harder to get to the end of than even Tank Girl, Popeye, or the 2003 Hulk. (Although I consider Suspiria a better movie than those three. It only hurt while it was on, those others inflicted far more lasting wounds.)
Quote from: InformationGeek on February 22, 2012, 05:55:39 PM
Quote from: CarlinBrock on February 22, 2012, 04:55:38 PM
Quote from: Kaseykockroach on February 22, 2012, 03:51:49 PM
4. Space Jam (1996)
3. Drive (2011)
2. The Dark Knight (2008)
Are you .. are you okay? Do you need anything?
We're all worried.
Oh that just Kasey being Kasey. Don't mind him.
Thinking about movies that are unwatchable: The Wild World of Batwoman and Zaat spring to mind. Thank God I watched that with the Mystery Science Theater guys. I could never make it through otherwise.
For an interesting example not from me, my dad tried sitting through Manos: The Hands of Fate with the MST3K guys, but said to turn off after a while because he couldn't make through even with the commentary.
Anyone who likes Space Jam isn't a Looney Tunes fan. :P
As for the other two, meh. And the only MST movie I've never been able to get through, with or without commentary, is Red Zone Cuba.
Hmmmm. ISHTAR, for one.
GANGS OF NEW YORK.
FULL MOON OVER BLUE WATER.
Definitely Bucky Larson and Envy (2004) and Transformers II: Revenge of the Fallen.
To me, worst of all is Envy because I expected better from those involved.
(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/f/fd/Envy_film_poster.jpg)
Quote from: indianasmith on February 22, 2012, 07:31:44 PM
Hmmmm. ISHTAR, for one.
GANGS OF NEW YORK.
FULL MOON OVER BLUE WATER.
what helped me get through that was taking an hour or so break after finishing the first disc on the DVD
it also made it much more enjoyable
Quote from: voltron on February 22, 2012, 01:27:25 PM
Pretty much anything released after 1989 sucks if you ask me. I can watch Maniac (1980) a million times, but it's the big budget newer movies that I find truly offensive in their mediocrity.
I agree wholeheartedly. If you want to find unwatchable movies, the theaters are full of them. :cheers:
I can think of a few wonderful 90's movies, and maybe two or three 2000's goodies.
Other than that, I'm with Voltron.
How could I forget - LAND OF THE LOST. My soul is still scarred!
Having seen some real stinkers, I've got a high tolerance for the kind of pain that comes from suckiness (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SuckinessIsPainful). Some of the movies that have a skull rating on their reviews here, I've seen, and I could even stand to view some of them again.
That said, I'm waiting for the day someone challenges me to pick out a movie for them that really will be so painful as to be altogether unwatchable in return for their picking one out for me, because I can name the absolute worst feature-length film ever made that not even Rifftrax could ever hope to redeem. Compared to this, nothing anyone could recommend would faze me.
It's called Spielen wir Liebe (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0076749/), and it's so bad that it's illegal in pretty much every country in Europe. People are also banned from selling it on eBay, and in many countries you can go to jail for owning one of the DVDs, which judges in every country ordered recalled and destroyed. Naturally, this hasn't stopped rips of it from circulating over file-sharing sites on the internet for everyone who just couldn't resist the temptation to see for themselves what a torture instrument this movie is.
I've seen it once, and have determined never to see it again; not on a dare, and not on a bet no matter how high the stakes. If civilization should collapse, entropy will render all our computers inoperable and all our discs and tapes and other storage devices unreadable within thirty years; a lot of our best stories from TV and the cinema will be irretrievably lost. We can be consoled, however, that at least Spielen wir Liebe will likewise perish from the face of the earth. That's how bad it is.
Quote from: akiratubo on February 22, 2012, 06:05:19 PM
Suspiria. The hardest slog through a movie I've ever had. It was harder to get to the end of than even Tank Girl, Popeye, or the 2003 Hulk. (Although I consider Suspiria a better movie than those three. It only hurt while it was on, those others inflicted far more lasting wounds.)
I love
Suspiria. Not for the story, because in that sense it's pretty terrible, but the sound mix of that film is something I absolutely adore. I love
Suspiria.
The least watchable movie I have ever seen is
Slapstick (Of Another Kind). That is the worst movie I have ever seen by a substantially large margin. I've watched a lot of terrible movies, more than any one person would expect to see in their lifetime, and I have yet to see a movie that has equaled
Slapstick in terribleness. I would go as far to say that my eternal soul has been compromised because I have seen that movie.
It is the worst. The literal worst. And I've seen it multiple times.
.The ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW-I've sed my piece about this stupid movie in the past.
.The DORM THAT DRIPPED BLOOD-Boring,too dark (you can't make out what's going on)-a real snoozefest.
.SAW-The first one. I never bothered to see any of the sequels. It just irratated me to no end. The fast forward camera stuff was grating.
.I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE-Unbearable. The rape scene goes on waaaay to long. They actually remade this! WHY??? Oh yeah-because kids nowadays think extreme torture (think HOSTEL,SAW) is what makes a horror film. :lookingup:
Try suspense and good acting.
.Oh lest I forget-SINGLE ROOM FURNISHED-Jayne Mansfield's last film. And an unwatchable piece of s**t it is.
My review of this black hole of a movie is here-
http://www.badmovies.org/forum/index.php/topic,133439.msg395998.html#msg395998
Quote from: akiratubo on February 22, 2012, 06:05:19 PM
Suspiria. The hardest slog through a movie I've ever had. It was harder to get to the end of than even Tank Girl, Popeye, or the 2003 Hulk. (Although I consider Suspiria a better movie than those three. It only hurt while it was on, those others inflicted far more lasting wounds.)
I never saw (or was even remotely interested in seeing
Hulk, but I own copies of and thoroughly enjoy
Suspiria,
Tank Girl and
Popeye. But I freely admit my taste is odd, even for this site.
One movie I found unwatchable was
The Light of Day (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093415/) (1987). I saw this in the theater, but was so bored with it I actually got up in the middle and went out into the lobby to make a phone call. On the bright side, it was a duplex theater, and the other show was
The Evil Dead 2. I heard people screaming in that theater and so went to see that the next night and have been a deadite ever since.
There have been a couple others that I saw in the theater, but I have blocked them so thoroughly that I can't even recall their names. One I saw in 1989 or 1990. I was alone in the theater. I think it featured Michael J. Pollard. But looking through his IMDB list, nothing rings a bell. It may have been
Dark Angel, but I can't swear to it. I was making escape plans on how to get out of the theater quickly through most of the movie, but I was too cheap to actually just leave since I had paid for it.
Quote from: the ghoul on February 22, 2012, 10:53:27 PM
Quote from: voltron on February 22, 2012, 01:27:25 PM
Pretty much anything released after 1989 sucks if you ask me. I can watch Maniac (1980) a million times, but it's the big budget newer movies that I find truly offensive in their mediocrity.
I agree wholeheartedly. If you want to find unwatchable movies, the theaters are full of them. :cheers:
While I agree that there are a lot more horrible movies coming out these days, I think there are just as many good ones. The reason being that there are just more movies being released overall. I don't think it's quite fair to dismiss anything that's been made in the last 20 or so years just because the blockbusters suck (and I agree that they often, but not always, do). If you look hard enough, you'll see that there are movies being made now that are just as good as ever (and that there were a lot of stinkers in the "olden" days). Just my two cents...
Quote from: JayJayM12 on February 23, 2012, 10:58:51 AM
Quote from: the ghoul on February 22, 2012, 10:53:27 PM
Quote from: voltron on February 22, 2012, 01:27:25 PM
Pretty much anything released after 1989 sucks if you ask me. I can watch Maniac (1980) a million times, but it's the big budget newer movies that I find truly offensive in their mediocrity.
I agree wholeheartedly. If you want to find unwatchable movies, the theaters are full of them. :cheers:
While I agree that there are a lot more horrible movies coming out these days, I think there are just as many good ones. The reason being that there are just more movies being released overall. I don't think it's quite fair to dismiss anything that's been made in the last 20 or so years just because the blockbusters suck (and I agree that they often, but not always, do). If you look hard enough, you'll see that there are movies being made now that are just as good as ever (and that there were a lot of stinkers in the "olden" days). Just my two cents...
Second, while I love collecting my era films there are many films made now in days that I would not want to live without.
I just realized that I never actually answered the question myself! For me, I would probably go with:
* ______ Movie - I agree with those that have said that the "spoofs" such as Date Movie, Epic Movie, etc... are unwatchable. I love a good spoof (Airplane, Top Secret, Naked Gun/Police Squad, among others), but it's gotten to the point these days where they forget to actually add in jokes. They feel as if they can just have Napoleon Dynamite or Snooki come out and say exactly what they always say, and the joke will write itself. They pretty much just recreate entire scenes from movies, WORD FOR WORD. It's fine to do the pop culture thing, but you can't just do an impression without writing material around it (I'm also looking at you Frank Caliendo).
* Talking Animal Movies Based On Cartoons - I get why these exist and why they are the way that they are, but growing up watching things like Alvin and The Chipmunks, Underdog, and Yogi Bear, these newer versions just don't do it for me.
Quote from: Kaseykockroach on February 22, 2012, 03:51:49 PM
10. The Heartbreak Kid (2007)
9. Epic Movie (2007)
8. Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)
7. Thomas and the Magic Railroad (2000)
6. The Garbage Pail Kids Movie (1987)
5. Tom & Jerry: The Movie (1992)
4. Space Jam (1996)
3. Drive (2011)
2. The Dark Knight (2008)
1. Transformers 3: Dark of the Moon (2011)
Space Jam....I'd forgotten about that one. Or had a deliberate memory block. It stunk big time!
some movie called SCAR that looked like it was filmed by a guy with clingfilm taped in front of the camera, and the audio was so bad every time someone spoke it would set of a load of hissy feedback that was actually painful to the ear.
the film itself was supposed to be a horror but looked more like a slow motion porno on drugs with no nudity
I've looked on amazon/imdb and seems there is more than one film called SCAR, not sure which one it was, if any of them.
Quote from: Pacman000 on February 22, 2012, 01:52:51 PM
I have one: Murder by Television, a 30's "thriller".
At the beginning of the movie a TV company asks Bela Lugosi to steal a new invention by a noted Television inventor he works for. The inventor makes a broadcast, winds up dead, and then...nothing really happens. Everyone wanders around the house for awhile, until someone kills Lugosi's character. Then Lugosi steps into the room, tells everyone that the dead guy was his evil twin, and proceeds to explain what happened to the inventor. Apparently someone added a new part to his television camera, which produced a ray of a particular frequency,"which is the death ray." To activate the devic,e someone called their office, which caused a rube golberg machine to work, which started the ray. Dumb, Dumb and dull.
I'm with you. I'd heard about this film for years, in books on Lugosi and such, and finally got a copy in a Mill Creek set. I'd rank it as posibly Lugosi's worst, because it wasn't even funny / bad.
Most of them are independent films, of course.
(http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-fE4eb7DYTo8/TeQAwVBgg6I/AAAAAAAADB8/3n7yTVFfkug/s1600/Hard%2BRock%2BZoms%2B1.jpg)
Quote from: tahrgat on February 22, 2012, 12:30:28 PM
Midnight Mass
(http://i160.photobucket.com/albums/t176/Tahrgat/thumb_midnightmass.jpg)
Oh oh. I thought this ^ looked familiar: and I just found it in the 'rainy day' pile. If it is really that bad maybe it should go straight to the 'out' box... :tongueout:
Thankskilling
Midnight Mass
Definitely the worst movie I've ever seen in my life. It still haunts me to this day after renting it in 2003. I still want that hour and thirty eight minutes of my life back!
Monster A Go-Go: Just padding out the movie with late teen to 20 somethin girls dancing isn't an excuse for a monster movie.
Quote from: El Toro Loco on February 23, 2012, 07:31:09 PM
Monster A Go-Go: Just padding out the movie with late teen to 20 somethin girls dancing isn't an excuse for a monster movie.
Oh man, I forgot about this one. Man does this film feel like it is sucking your soul out as you are watching it.
Speaking of soul suckers...
Vampire's Night Orgy: No orgy, no real vampires in any form of the word, an extremely slow pace, sometimes hard to watch due to film quality, padding like crazy, and ending that standing right next to Monster A-Go Go proudly. I would watch Transformers, any one of them, before I watch this film again.
Plan 9. I've never been able to get through it.
I see Friedberg and Seltzer movies have shown up, and rightfully so. Not only are their movies unwatchable, but should be taken as a personal responsibility by all humans to avoid supporting in any way, shape, or form.
I liked the first couple of Saw movies a little bit, but couldn't make it through any of the Hostel movies.
Although I've given it a shot a couple of times, I absolutely cannot watch Arthur 2: On the Rocks. That movie is such an insult to the original that bore no resemblence to anything about it that worked or was charming.
Rob Zombie's Halloween 2 was a disaster. I actually liked the first one on some levels, but the second one actually looked like Rob really didn't want to make it.
For me the most unwatchable movies are bad comedies. The great part of most b movies is that you get laughs from their badness whereas bad comedy movies are just plain BAD!
The Pest-John Leguizamo at his worst in this no joke, incredibly annoying romp through a world of s**t.
Lets Go To Prison-I watched birdemic for the whole running time, this movie I couldnt get past the first 15 minutes. Sadly I bought this movie for 3 $
Hangover Part 2-Among the laziest cash ins I've ever seen, this movie encapsulates whats wrong with hollywood. If you like the first one this one is the exact same thing minus the laughs.
Stonerville-If you like stoner comedies then you'll hate this! Its sad that leslie nielson had to appear in such terrible crap after such a great career in comedy.
2001 A Space Travesty-Another Leslie Nielson casting that makes me know hes in a better place now. The only movie I ever left the theater for.
I rented a piece of sh!t called SHARK NIGHT.Pretty Ken and Barbie "hip"collage kids, generic music,ridicous fast forward scenes of driving and partying,mean hicks,little gore,bad cgi-uh. I feel asleep in disgust that I spent $1.98 cents renting this run of the mill junk.
For me its Independence Day, dollar for dollar the worst film ever. The cliches in this gave me a headache. For the other end of the spectrum don't try Forbidden Zone, its like watching a bunch of hyper actinve 5 year olds running around a confined space for hours
Skydivers. Like MST3K said, "I think they forgot to have anything happen in this movie."
Alone in the Dark. I own this movie and have watched it over a dozen times. I still can't tell you the slightest thing about it because always stop paying attention after the first few minutes.
The Hottie & the Nottie . The Paris Hilton "romantic comedy" that's neither romantic nor funny and sends the message that only beautiful people deserve love.
Gigli. I still have no idea how to even pronounce this one.
and absolutley anything the Polonia brothers have ever done.
Mac and Me
Monster A-Go-Go
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
I saw "Quintet" the other night. You'd think a movie directed by Robert Altman and starring paul Newman would have some redeeming values but it doesn't. 2 hours of people wandering back and forth across what looks like an old casino in the snow.
Quote from: RCMerchant on February 27, 2012, 05:37:06 AM
I rented a piece of sh!t called SHARK NIGHT.Pretty Ken and Barbie "hip"collage kids, generic music,ridicous fast forward scenes of driving and partying,mean hicks,little gore,bad cgi-uh. I feel asleep in disgust that I spent $1.98 cents renting this run of the mill junk.
Have to disagree with you on this one-I enjoyed Shark Night. That's the first movie I've ever seen that showed Cookie Cutter sharks usually just the bigger ones, Great Whites , Tigers, and Bulls
I actually kind of liked Quinet but then I do have a soft spot for post apocalyptic ice age style movies...
Quote from: lester1/2jr on February 28, 2012, 08:53:41 AM
I saw "Quintet" the other night. You'd think a movie directed by Robert Altman and starring paul Newman would have some redeeming values but it doesn't. 2 hours of people wandering back and forth across what looks like an old casino in the snow.
And that camera filter!
Altman has stated that this is one of his favorite films among the ones he's made. I view it as a failed experiment, lazy '70s sci-fi. Maybe the end was too choreographed, but most probably it's just a boring movie in the first place.
yeah what was with the blurry stuff on the edges iof the camera lens?
jase- virtually nothing happens though
http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/19790216/REVIEWS/808289998/1023
Quotejase- virtually nothing happens though
There is probably a sub-genera of 70's movies where nothing really happens.
UFO: Target Earth, They/Invasion from Inner-Earth, Idaho Transfer, Terror at the Red Wolf Inn, the list goes on, and on, just like those movies. :smile:
Idaho Transfer moved at the speed of OLD molasses but it did move.
Quote from: mrsskinner on February 28, 2012, 04:12:01 PM
Quote from: RCMerchant on February 27, 2012, 05:37:06 AM
I rented a piece of sh!t called SHARK NIGHT.Pretty Ken and Barbie "hip"collage kids, generic music,ridicous fast forward scenes of driving and partying,mean hicks,little gore,bad cgi-uh. I feel asleep in disgust that I spent $1.98 cents renting this run of the mill junk.
Have to disagree with you on this one-I enjoyed Shark Night. That's the first movie I've ever seen that showed Cookie Cutter sharks usually just the bigger ones, Great Whites , Tigers, and Bulls
I kinda liked it too - it's certainly not a good movie by any stretch of the imagination, but it wasn't a completelly UNfun way to spend 90 minutes. The funniest part had to be the cast rap-along at the end (I saw it at the theater, so I can't remember if it was DURING or AFTER the credits, but it was ridiculous, horrible, and hilarious).
In my experience... it is a recent movie: Jack and Jill.
It is the first time I honestly felt pain seeing a movie, I want to remember I am fan of B-movies; I watched ``Jane and the lost city'', ``Super Mario Bros'' and ``Suburban Commando'' without any problem.
When going to the theater I was expecting a fun story like ``Twins (1988)''... instead it is horrible. The took everything fun from Twins and filled with annoying dialogs and non humor.
Backyard Dogs.
Came out in 1999 or so, at the height of the late '90s "wrestling resurgence."
Basically, the story is that a bunch of teens start up their own 'backyard wrestling league', film it and, it becomes so big that 'kids can retire from their earnings.'
The title comes from the stars of the movie, an up-and-coming team who name themselves 'Backyard Dogs', because they 'wrestle in yards', and just 'stepped in dogsh*t'.
Anything made by that bloated turd, Michael Moore.
nothing...NOTHING is more unwatchable then that piece of crap Bucky Larson which makes on angrier and feel unclean while watching
Off the top of my head I can think of at least 3 films I couldn't finish: The Spirit, Manos: Hands of Fate, and Epic Movie.
My number one most hated movie will always be Side ways.... the more pretentious peice off garbage to win an award in the universe... so far. >_< other movies I strongly dislike though. Are movies I dislike are movies like... Wild Cherry (2009) My Boss's Daughter (2003) and Red (2010) I never forgave my boyfriend for saying "lets go see Red!!" and making me acctually agree to going.
Quote from: molokai cargo on February 27, 2012, 09:32:51 AM
For the other end of the spectrum don't try Forbidden Zone, its like watching a bunch of hyper actinve 5 year olds running around a confined space for hours
Personally Forbidden Zone is one of my favourites, but each to their own.
The film I will NEVER EVER watch again is Clerks 2. I HATE IT!!!!