(http://www.wired.com/wp-content/uploads/images_blogs/underwire/2010/08/twin_peaks_13a.jpg)
When the neighbor fired up the chain saw, and asked "Hey, is that the Captain's log?" for the thousandth time, Edna used her 'pet wood' to give him a Proctology lesson he'd never forget.
I'm your number one fan. Here, spread your legs apart a bit for me. And can you hand me that sledgehammer? Thanks.
(http://www.wired.com/wp-content/uploads/images_blogs/underwire/2010/08/twin_peaks_13a.jpg)
Brings a new meaning to the term "morning wood."