I was sitting at work when we received a phone call informing us that there had been a stabbing on camp and medical assistance had been summoned. The guard commander armed up the mobile patrol and briefed them to escort the ambulance. We were all at action stations.
What it turned out to be was that a chef had been cutting up some veg in his room and accidentally cut himself, and not a large or deep one either, but he'd felt the need to phone an ambulance.
Seriously, kids today.
I stabbed myself the other when I was using a steak knife to unjam a paper shredder and all I did was stick two bandaids over it.