I know Freddy Kruger would make one bad-ass Ninja...he's got all the techniques down pat. I'm talking about what movie slasher would make the down-and-out, absolute WORST Ninja of all time!
Michael Myers: He's deadly and silent all right, but he's just. too. slow. And in recent years, he's gotten a tad clumsy too. Next.
Jason Voorhees: Forget it. It ain't happening. For Christ's sake, he's always breaking stuff just for the sake of breaking it. He makes Vegeta on a bad day look like a 6-week-old-baby having a fit. "Stealth" is not in this man's vocabulary. Next.
Hannibal Lector: Ha! You've got to be joking. You could pick him out of a whole crowd of Ninja-he'd be the one with the stylish navy outfit with turquoise trim. The rest of the clan would boot him out in a hurry after they found out he took the "pleasure" of redecorating thier dojo while they were out. But he'd just come back and eat them all anyway.
Leatherface: After the first blood-curling "YEEEEEEEEEEE-HAWWWWW" accompanied by the chainsaw buzz of doom, they'd most likely jump-kick him to Mars. Damn that would be annoying, going all that way for some authentic Japanese food and gettin' sent to space instead.
Leprechaun: They wouldn't be able to find a Ninja robe small enough for him. Yet.
Chucky: He's just too much of an impatient bastard. It was his fooling with magic that got him turned into a doll in the first place. He's had no luck being a sorceror, he's definitely gonna suck at being a ninja.
IT: Ninja clown? Forgeddaboutit.
the leprechaun would be a crazy ninja, well, crazily funny anyway.
What about leatherface would make a decent ninja, just instead of nunchucks he could tie two chainsaws together. now i'd pay to see that!
-Dan
What about the Tall Man from Phantasm?
Steven Q. Urkel
4 words: "Did I do that?"
The Ladies' Man
He's too busy throwing pick up lines than ninja stars
Stuart Little
You think the Leperchan is bad, try to find a suit for this guy.
Steve Irwin a.k.a. the Crocodile Hunter
Acutally, he would be a good ninja if he didn't look like he was breast fed coffee.
Robocop
Somehow, I don't think being a silent assassin would be affective if he's 400 to 500lbs of hard metal and yelling "Drop it!"
Beetlejuice
Ahc! The smell alone...
Calista Flockheart
No, No, I take it back. She can make a good ninja. With her size and shape, she can squeeze into a small crack on the wall, or go through a chain-linked fence without having to cut a hole. Also a good choice, Lara Flynn Boyle.
That's enough talk about ninja casting that'll heavily water menachem Golan's mouth in yearning to make a new ninja movie(with Hong Kong-style fight sequences,of course....a trend that mainstream Hollywood is happily ripping off,and making overly-trendy,but is not doing a very good job at ; ala "Charlie's Angels" , the upcoming "Daredevil",and Quentin Tarantino's upcoming "Kill Bill"(the outrageous splatter kills will save that film,of course).
Peewee Herman. If the silly laugh at his own sneakyness diden't give him away, the red and white bike would.
mr. bean...he'd snuff himself with his own weapons. teddy bear sidekick with stare-of-death.
regis philbun..."IS THIS YOUR FINAL BREATH?" (his ninja catch-phrase). sidekick kelly in bikini (this would be good tho).
tom green...weapon of choice: doody on a micorphone. sidekick glenn with gut of power.
-mr. henry
(let's list our puny sites...
www.310am.com)
Jimmy Carter!!! The poor bastard can't even walk down stairs!
Jay-Lousy ninja. He cannot shut up! And God forbid he's sneaking around and sees a girl undressing. That's it, it would be all over for him!
Silent Bob-Badass ninja! He just needs to drop a few pounds.
Jabba the Hutt - A big ninja slug going huh huh huh, now that's bad.