Brutal. Will this godforsaken movie never end?
This is the CROCODILE that was filmed in South Korea and Thailand. It's not so much that it's terrible. . . Okay, it is terrible. It's just that it's easier to pay attention to a television tuned to static than it is to this movie. At no point does anything remotely interesting ever happen on screen.
Well, that's a bit of an overstatement. See, according to the narrator at the beginning, nature strikes back. . . LIKE THIS!
A giant crocodile, mutated by atomic testing, is attacking people left and right. First it gobbles up our hero scientist's family. Then it attacks several other villages. This all happens very sloooowly. ATANARJUAT, a three hour movie about eskimos I saw the other day, had better pacing than this. Near the end of the movie, our protagonists get on a boat to hunt down the beast. "Now all we have to do is wait." one of them announces. Ten minutes later, we, the audience, are still waiting. Eloi, eloi, lama sabachthani!
Okay, maybe I'm overstating my case once again.
The incredibly bad crocodile effects may be the only thing that saves this horrid piece of crap. It's mostly shots of a crocodile set against models. Actually it's mostly just close ups of the crocodile's eye while the same six note theme plays over and over. Oh yeah, this crocodile's eyes glow in the dark. Must be all that radiation. (It would be so much easier if, like everybody else, killer animals got sick and died when exposed to radiation.) Also, among this crocodile's special talents is the ability to create whirlpools. And look for the end shots when the 30 ft. (sic) crocodile leaps(!) over the boat.
So let me end on the only thing I really liked about this movie. The family at the beginning is enjoying a meal outside. At the end of the shot, the camera zooms in and focuses on the model duck at the center of the table. Why we are pondering what the hell this is supposed to mean (and why do they have a duck display on their table?), the director cuts to the next shot. It is, of course, ducks on a river, complete with quacking. It's stuff like this that makes it all worthwhile.
P.S. This (http://us.imdb.com/Title?0079011) is the IMDb page. The first review on the comments page is the best of the bunch.
Oh,boy. And i thought the currant one was bad. Imagin a back to back showing of these two? Oh, wait! Sorry i brought that up! That would come under the Geniva conventions and SALT 2 treaty................