Reading the long ass discussion in Velvet Brotha's "Evil Matt, what makes you so evil?" thread about poser goth kids and the like got me to thinking of a revelation about high school I had the other day.
I was trying to think back to whether or not I was "cool" in high school (man, that seems SO long ago), or if anyone I currently know was "cool". Then it hit me. People in high school are NOT cool. None of them. Because no matter how much money you drop on clothes at Hot Topic, you're still in friggin' high school. You're not cool, you're not on the cutting edge of anything, and despite what MTV tells you, you're not quite the future of our great society (at least, not yet...there's still a generation or two ahead of you). What you are is annoying, and you make the mall a pain in the ass to shop in.
Anybody who's a regular on this board that attends high school (or just generally disagrees with me) should feel free to post a reply, but I wouldn't expect much in the way of a concession from me. So unless you come flat out and say "Yeah...I'm in the 11th grade, and I've suddenly realized that I'm horrendously uncool", I'm not going to think you're the slightest bit "cool".
And if that worries you at all, you really should find someone to talk to that has the authority to prescribe Zoloft...
Before anyone cares to remind me of it, I already know I'm not cool. Because:
A) I AM posting this on a B-Movie message board, after all.... :)
B) I just used an emoticon.
C) I play Dungeons and Dragons
D) I could talk to you for hours about the philosophical and psychological differences between Batman and Superman
and E) I was rocking out to the musical stylings of Styx on my way to work tonight.
Oh yeah, lots of uncool goin' on in high school. Although, most of the "cool" people that us "uncool" people had to worry about picking on us were too busy being afraid of me because they thought I was a devil worshipper (I'm not, incidentally) to worry about whether or not I was cool.
And I'm still not. I can hold a fairly serious discussion about Al Adamson, I own a Dr. Who t-shirt with a cartoon Dalek on it, and I can identify stock Toho actors an tell you which Godzilla films they've been in and what parts they played.
Brother R
"Although, most of the "cool" people that us "uncool" people had to worry about picking on us"
Hey now...I never said I was uncool. Just everyone else!
Yeah? Top this.
1) I'm only 28, and I've used the phrases " you damn kids" and "get off my lawn".
2) I never played Dungeons and Dragons......because I couldn't figure out the dice.
3) I know all the words to 99 Red Balloons...English and German.
4) When Captain Kirk died, I wept....every damn time.
5) I bought a 1985 Plymouth Fury when I was 16. I currently drive...a 1985 Plymouth Fury.
6) I own an "I'm with Stupid" t-shirt,
7) I have actually worn that same t-shirt.
8) When someone asks my name, I reply variously..I'm Batman...I AM SPARTACUS...or They call me MISTER TIBBS!! And, I think I'm being clever.
9) When a waiter/waitress asks if I need anything else, I invariably reply...Send more paramedics. And. I think I'm being clever.
10) I had a Fonzie pompadour, long after the rest of the world realized that Henry Winkler isn't cool.
Ok, you've got me on most of those. However, I'm 26, and "you damn kids" and "get off my lawn" figure prominently into my daily vocabulary. I also spend a good deal of time standing on my front porch yelling at cars to slow down. And I too know al the words to "99 Red Balloons". I even sang it at a karaoke bar once, much to the dismay of the bar's clientele.
Holy balls..you're kung fu is strong. Gonna have to throw out my hole card. I....Play....The BANJO!!!! I am the LAMEST MAN ALIVE!!!!
Does it make me lamer for wanting to learn to play the banjo? Because in a way, I'm sort of jealous of you for being able to play the banjo. I'd also like to learn the acordion, because you never know when something like that will come in handy.
Being a fan of bluegrass, I'm also envious of Deej's banjo-rockin' ability.
Brother R
Alright, the banjo bit was a lie.....but the fact that I lied about playing the banjo makes even lamer. And the fact that I seem to be actually proud of my lameness, not only makes me lame, it also makes me pretty damned sad! I'm need to be alone to weep for awhile.
Dude, that WAS lame.
Strangely, this thread has turned into "Who can be the lamest?"...
I CAN play the triangle!!
Can you play "99 Red Balloons" on the triangle, though?
Nope, but I can fart the theme from Love Story. Okay, now I'm just being incoherant, time to go to bed.
Ah yes highschool a time in my life which I could have done with out.I was honestly on the top ten list of most unpopular people in school.Seriously, they made a list and put it up in the bathroom, I think I was number 4.
My problem was that I could not fit in any group.The jocks and preps hated me because I was a geek that was smarter than all of them.The goth and metal kids did not like me because I was more cynical,sarcastic and moody than all of them.And all the other miscalanious groups didn't like me because, liking me would mean they would be instantly as unpopular as I was.
But my excomunication from the other groups gave me a unique insite on everyone in school.I came to the conclusion that Evil Matt did and that was everyone was a loser.Everyone but me was trying desperatly to fit into a specific group.They spent hundreds of dollors trying to go along with the latest fad, and had to do what everyone else was doing or they would be thought uncool.
At first I cared about trying to belong, but after awhile I came to realise why should I care.Why should I try and belong to a group which has ridiculed me.If I became apart of one group I would stay face creticism from anouther group.
Im glad that I stayed who I was.I became a much stronger person because of it.
O.K. , if you want to hear uncool, ask me how warp drive works. I can explain it and a lot of real world things in excruciating detail.
I too was seriously uncool back in high school.
Yeah, I was a skater. I was the guy who always had his board in class with him. Never did fit in with the other skaters though due to the fact that none of them really skated. They were just going for the look which I normally tried to avoid. I didn't care about the look. I just wanted to skate. It was kind of stupid at the time that they would want to be skaters, because back then skaters weren't "cool" like today.
Hell if I were in high school today and still skated, I'd be considered one of the "cool" kids. Funny how things change.
But on second thought, that wouldn't be a good thing. I think that I'd have to shoot myself if one of the cool kids said:
"Hey isn't Good Charlotte THE BEST!?"
or
"Have you heard the new Korn song? They rock so hard!"
At the point of being asked about Good Charlotte, I would tie the kid to a chair and make him listen to some good ole Operation Ivy.
At the point of being asked about Korn, I would sit them down and listen to the self titled album in it's entirity.
Might even give em nightmares.
LOL
Deej wrote:
> Nope, but I can fart the theme from Love Story. Okay, now I'm
> just being incoherant, time to go to bed.
>
Dude, if I had that skill I'd be a millionare!
lol
Evil Matt, I'll go you one further and say that just as few people in college and, in fact, adult life are cool. Go ahead and mock the high school in crowd for paying lots of money for crappy, ridiculous looking clothes just as a status symbol. For my money, they've got nothing on the 30-something jerkoff who lives in a city where parking is difficult and he only has himself to drive around and still he owns a gigantic gas-guzzling SUV or pickup truck because he thinks it makes him look cool. And worse still are the guys who drive around in the $65,000 import cars that are in the shop three days a week. Look at what our society now views as the pinaccle of coolness: The Friends Show characters. THAT'S what cool is.
In high school and for the rest of our lives, there's the uncool and the uncool who just don't realize it. I place myself squarely in the former category. I just spent twenty minutes singing Mary Had a Little Lamb to a sick three month old. My illusions are shattered.
Eirik wrote:
I just spent twenty minutes singing Mary Had a Little Lamb to a sick three month old.
That, sir, makes you cool. I hope your child gets well.
Kirk
> Eirik wrote:
I just spent twenty minutes singing Mary Had a Little Lamb to a sick three month old.
Awwwwwwwww.... : ) Don't you just love babies?
> And worse still are the guys who drive around in the $65,000 import cars that are in the shop three days a week.
Try working around the a***oles that work with. Engineers driving around in $200, 000 dollar cars and trying to hog up the women to make up for their past short comings. ; ) Sometimes I feel like giving them wedgies and put them in headlocks, just so they don't forget who they really are. ; )
Thank you, Kirk. Her spirits continued to rise through the afternoon. Light at the end of the tunnel.
A few things I've noticed as I've aged, a term which instilled hatred in the most level headed child is now a compliment, a NERD. Thankfully when I was in high school I was a pretty big boy so no one really bothered me and left me to shove my nose in the books, although at the time being 6'3 250 seemed such a burden. I think back to those days at what I would have done to someone who dared to refer to me as a "NERD", but now I think of it as a great compliment when my peers introduce as the nerd of our group :) and would have ever thought I would be proud to say I have an MSCS lol.
Also for those not old enough to have experience a high school reunion, you'll be pretty surprised when you do. 3 years ago I went to my 10 year, and it was the best revenge ever. Our high school stud was still sporting a mullet, had 4 kids and a wonderful job at a local bowling alley (funny he was voted most likely to succeed). The school hottie now had thighs somewhat reminiscent of a rhino's and worked as a retail clerk at a local strip mall. Many of the people that were cast as "Nerds" or "Geeks" were the people that actually had done something with their lives. The strangest thing was the girls that never wanted to give me the time of day were now apologetic and shamelessly interested in me now.
And lastly, I know I'm cool, my son thinks I'm the coolest thing that ever happened to this planet, and that's all that matters to me :)
"And lastly, I know I'm cool, my son thinks I'm the coolest thing that ever happened to this planet, and that's all that matters to me :)"
I'd love to be able to say the same thing, and in truth, my kids DO think I'm the coolest thing around, but I can't really say they're the authority on it when I catch them spinning around in circles until they get stomachaches. :)
Oh, and I totally agree that the word "nerd" is sort of a badge of honor now. Hell, I have a wallet with the word "dork" embroidered on it, and it's the coolest thing ever...
I went to my 10th reunion last Sept. I didn't recognize many people and nobody outside of a few friends knew who I was. Fairly lame s**t. I do admit that I get a mean-spirited thrill everytime I go to out local United Supermarket, because bagging my groceries is one of the most popular guys in my HS class.
"I'd love to be able to say the same thing, and in truth, my kids DO think I'm the coolest thing around, but I can't really say they're the authority on it when I catch them spinning around in circles until they get stomachaches. :)"
Sounds like the three of us are in the golden years of parenting. Wait ten years. Whatever our kids think of us, "coolest guy on Earth" probably won't enter into their equation.