So I'm sitting here reading archives on www.maximonline.com and they're all about the grossest, nastiest jobs or things found at jobs.
Hilarious stuff!
Trust me, you want to go and read some of the things that have happened to people there.
Here's the link to go read the many gross/funny stories:
http://www.maximonline.com/grit/worst_job/archive.html
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After reading several stories I remembered one specific story one of my ex-girlfriends told me.
She was working at J.C. Penney's at the time and the store was getting ready to close.
She and several of her co-workers noticed a peculiar smell while straightening up the shelves before the end of their shift.
They basically did the "hot & cold" thing to help them zero in on it.
Sniffing around the store, they finally came to the aisle where the women's purses are kept.
They found out what the smell was and where it was coming from...
Someone had taken a nasty s**t inside one of the purses and placed it back on the shelf.
EWWWW!!!!
They had surmised that someone must've taken it into one of the dressing rooms and done the deed in there.
What disturbed them most of all was that it was most likely a woman that had done it. (or so they thought)
I can't believe how disgusting and messed up some people are!
It boggles the mind.
Have any of you had any disgusting experiences at work?
(http://www.maximonline.com/grit/worst_job/images/main.jpg)
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Post Edited (07-15-04 01:13)
Aw geez that's a gross site Ash, how the hell do you find this stuff?(good job BTW) I suppose the closest to worst job I've had was when the night shift at the McDonalds my brother worked at needed help. They had an inspection the next day and they really needed extra people to help. My brother asked me and I said "sure" and I went over and helped clean the grease off the floor from 11:00 to 3:30. It wasn't so bad actually I finally got to meet all the weird but cool and nice people my brother told me so much about. I guess the grossest thing I saw was when one of the guys empty a fryer into a bucket. The grease was kinda light brownish with yellow and had black spots in it as well as chunks and a god awful stench! (I know that's sorta wimpie but it was the grossest I could come up with)
Post Edited (07-06-04 02:20)
Oh...I remember another gross story.
My old buddy Brian's uncle owns a turkey farm in northern Iowa.
He paid us to help him out one day when a couple of his workers didn't show up.
Needless to say, dealing with live turkeys is a messy, smelly business.
We were told to use shovels and a wheelbarroww to clean up turkey s**t.
We were to shovel it into the wheelbarrow and haul it outside where it was to be put into a bin. (Don't ask me what he did with it after we put it in there)
The problem was that some turkeys can be quite mean and will chase you and peck at your legs and ankles.
It was hot inside there so ceiling fans are installed to keep it somewhat cool.
These fans spin at an incredibly high rate of speed and are made of steel.
One kept pecking at my friend so he grabbed it up and drop-kicked it right into the fan!
It made a loud "CLANG" noise and feathers flew everywhere.
The turkey never pecked at anything again.
Also, on our way out to dump a load of crap, my friend was pulling the wheelbarrow behind him when a turkey ran right underneath the wheel of the wheelbarrow and got totally squashed.
Its guts literally shot out of its ass.
YUCK!!
I was walking behind him so I saw everything and I had to use my gloved hand to pick them up and throw them into the wheelbarrow.
Yummy!
(http://www.norbest.com/images/tour_live_1.jpg)
Ugh! You're "Wheelbarrel and Turkey" story isn't as bad as the first one. The wheel barrel part an accident (still gross) and the first part was more funny but the story about solid waste in a purse was too gross! I mean that was person that did it on purpose!
Wait! I have a better story (you'll love this one) it's not mine but one of my teachers told it. (my favorite teacher)
His name is Peter. Peter had a friend who was a captain of a college Basketball team. There was this one weird dude in the group that would, for five dollars, eat anybodys boogers. So they'd pick their nose, smear it on the window (really fine like) and the Weird Dude would lick up the snot booger or just remove it off the window with his finger and eat it.
So one day during the game this one guy ,let's call him Kenny, is playing and he gets a elbow in the face. This causes his nose to break and blood comes gousing out of his nose. Kenny sat out of the rest of the game. His nose wall all bent to one side. Well one the way home on the bus (here's the good part) Kenny's nose has stopped bleeding but he goes over to Weird Dude and says "Hey". So with his fingers he reachs into his nose and extracts a inch-long-bloody-booger. He smears hit across the window and says" eat that". Weird Dude takes the booger and puts it in his mouth. Instead of swalloing it he begins to chew it like gume, or some sort of tough beef *chew* *chew* *chew*. (At this point a guy gets up and goes over to the trash can and gags)
I'll tell another story that my favorite teacher ,Peter, told us about.
When I worked in Dallas many years ago, we had a customer that was a beer distributor . They were complaining of a printer problem, so we go over and take the cover off the printer . The thing was cockroach central , they came pouring like in the movie Joe's Apartment.
Well a friend of mine works in a supermarket, one night he went out to the back storeroom to check out some inventory, he said that he was gone for around about 2 minutes. When he came out, he found a turd sitting in the middle of one of the isles. Somebody actually took a s**t on the spot and left it there.
Another time a drunk guy came in to the store and took a leak down some sort of ventilation duct in the chiller where all the dairy foods are kept, he was so p**sed that he thought it was a drain.
Finally, this isnt someone I know but someone I felt sorry for. I went to go and use a public restroom, someone had decided to smear s**t allover everything. I decided it was best to leave, on my way out I saw the cleaner coming along with his mop and bucket, with a bit of a p**sed off look on his face, I felt bad for him :)
Quick question, what does the OT on the title of some of these mean?
OT means "Off Topic" as in something not about badmovies.
My dad has been in law enforcement for years- he now has coroner duties and has seen some gnarley stuff:
1- Dead bodies that are half eaten by cats.
2- Dead bodies that are completely eaten by wolves.
3- Drunk people that uriniate & deficate on themselves in his presence.
4- A high female, naked (not good naked... trust me), threw her used tampon at him.
5- He's been vomited on countless times.
The list could go on for days...
I used to work in a heritage listed Restaurant/Bakery, it was supposed to be really classy and tourists would often come to eat there but the place was filthy, crawling with cockroaches and rats.
We never had enough milk so if some cockroaches crawled into the hot milk jug for making coffee they would just froth the milk with them in there and pour it into the coffee... no one ever noticed.
Also we found cockroaches baked into the cakes on more than one occasion. After working there I was kinda put off buying coffee and cake at restaurants for a while.
Here's somtehing gross and also something to ponder on:
My ex used to have a job in his teens working at a mexican restaurant. Part of his job was removing stuff from the tables and dumping the tortilla chips leftover into a giant bin.
As it turns out...they recycled.
I don't have any stories of my own, so I'll just post this link to a post I read a few years ago, that always stuck in my mind (have no idea why the link didn't work, so those of you interested, here's a copy you can cut and paste);
http://www.google.com/groups?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&frame=right&th=5e0d1f805be2dee1&seekm=36DDC45C.64198C0C%40info2000.net#link10
Post Edited (07-09-04 20:14)
Well, if you are looking for worst jobs, there is really no contestant to a paramedic. My friend worked as a paramedic, in a small town no less, so he knew all the corpses he was dealing with. I hated getting that guy going.
My grossest work story, and I don't think it's gross so much as funny although you may feel different, is as follows:
I've been working in a library for quite a few years. For a long time I was a page, which meant I sort and ordered books, placed them on the shelves and generally tidied up the place. (Not janitorial work, just picking up books and the like.) Anyway, one day I was walking across the floor upstairs, and I looked down and saw something strange. It was one half of a pair of false teeth.
Just sitting there.
On the floor.
One half of a pair of false teeth.
What could I do? I told the librarian in charge about it. I picked it up with a paper towel. I don't know what happened to it. Did it go in lost and found? I'm pretty sure that's some sort of biohazard.
Anyway, that's the weirdest thing I've ever had to pick up.
But I did just read a story on fark.com about how garbage collectors have learned to not pick up bags that they feel are filled with human waste. This is because when that trash compactor compacts them they tend to explode on the people in the truck.
okay, doubt I could beat any of u ;live in Oz;,worked in hospitality-staff pick up food off the floor, spit in food, try to run out on bills(which can truly get ugly-believe me) & @ one place very famous I worked at, we had rats - which some customers saw
okay, doubt I could beat any of u ;live in Oz;,worked in hospitality-staff pick up food off the floor, spit in food, try to run out on bills(which can truly get ugly-believe me) & @ one place very famous I worked at, we had rats - which some customers saw
Iguanagirl and reagan? where did you work? Just wondering so I never go there by chance!
I've had nothing really that disgusting in my jobs over the years except for foodstuffs that have bad smells. But a friend of mine told me a funny story once:
He worked with the local Tram company [trams aren't quite a bus, not quite a train, in case you were wondering] and was in his uniform catching the Train home from work. There was a man in one section of the train that looked like he was sitting down, except if you paid close enough attention, you'd come to realise he wasn't actually sitting on a seat.
Soon enough, a smell starts wafting through the train carriage as this man has just relieved himself, and because my friend is in a public transport uniform [though a different company to the one he was currently on] people expected him to do something about it.
I also remember feeling very sorry for myself and many other passengers of a tram with a huge pool of vomit on the floor: when the tram moved, the vomit moved; up and down practically the whole damn Tram. Nasty, nasty nasty.
I have some disgusting experiences from work, not as nasty as the J.C Penny story though. As a lifeguard I've seen many people pukin in the pool, and had to scoop the chunks out (which still makes me gag). My mother is constantly grossing me out with her job (she's an enterostomal nurse), with descriptions of "oozing wound" and "seepage", it totally grosses me out but excites her (shudder). Ugh...that's it.
i wonder why poop is most poular?... i worked in a bar for over a year.. and the men's room ws particularly nasty... so we all took turns cleaning it.... i was about 4 months pregnant w/our daughter and i walk in there and someone had smeared poop all over the toilet and wall beside the toilet.. and left diarhea in hte bowl.... now come on!! needless to say i puked (pregnant) and being supervisor i made some one else clean it up... (i'm not a b***h i was just practically passed out form puking.... and had to go clean myself up...)
I can't believe how many of these stories bring back memories.
In high school, I was a janitor at the local tourist trap. I was glad I'd never eaten there before. I watched dishwashers throw mashed potatoes at the kitchen ceiling, that remained there, changing colour, for the duration of my employment. One guy used to eat salads from the salad bar. I mean, he'd go to the cooler where it was kept after hours, grab the egg salad, and eat a couple of big scoops with the serving spoon that was in it. Another guy would grab the bowl of jello cubes and eat them with his fingers. He'd toss them up in the air and try to catch them in his mouth. The owner was no example either. One time, the cheapskate dropped a roast beef on the floor while taking it out of the oven, and chased it around the greasy, dirty floor trying to slide the platter under it. Then he served it.
My job there included taking out the kitchen garbage. There were bags of it by the end of the day, many of them full of the stuff cleaned out of the bottom of the dishwasher - soggy crap and liquid. We had cheap bags, and they'd leak. I'd either double or triple bag it (and risk getting in trouble), or I'd have to mop up the trail between the kitchen and the bin. Sometimes, the bin would get filled to the top, and we'd just pile the bags beside the building (in full view of the parking lot) until it could be emptied. One of the managers usually tossed it in during the day, after the truck had come. After I was fired from there (that would be a whole other thread), I used to walk by at night, and if I saw bags of soggy kitchen garbage, I'd stop and neatly slice the bottom with a pocket knife. They'd leak, of course, but that was not unusual. Still, you could imagine what happened when somebody grabbed the top and gave a hard yank.
I have heard a similar story to Ash's turkey. An electrician buddy was working in a turkey barn, among the turkeys. He was looking up at his work, took a step backward off a short platform, and stepped on a turkey. Guts shot out its ass.
He told me another story about a coworker who, while working at a feed mill, fell into a huge vat of liquid fat. The guy actually wiped off what he could and kept working in grease-soaked clothes.
I can also relate to the gross stuff police have to deal with. My dad did it for over 30 years. He didn't talk about the bad stuff much, but I remember he used to own a filter mask - the kind you might use when painting a car or spraying weeds - that I'd never seen him use. When I asked about it, he told me it was for those solitary old folks whose absence is not noticed for a few weeks.
My wife, on the other hand, was raised by paramedics. She remembers some less than appetizing dinner table conversations when she was a kid.
The best thing I can contribute from my current job is that I've gone to a number of barn fires, and you can sometimes hear pigs exploding inside.
Generally, I'm kept away from the really gross stuff, but I once got talking to the TV cameraman who often shows up. We were both waiting at an accident until the coroner arrived, and we had nothing better to do. He's been in the business a long time, and he's seen some shocking stuff. Back before the emergency workers here had good portable lights, they'd ask him to bring his over and shine it into a wreck. There was one really bad accident that was used to scare us back when I took driver training in high school. Half a dozen intoxicated teenagers packed, without seatbelts, into a car that flew off a curve doing twice the speed limit. When he described it, I knew it right away. Turns out, this guy had to stick his head right into the car and shine a light on the passengers.
Post Edited (07-15-04 09:37)
I knew a friend who worked at a movie theater, and apparently, during the movie "Blue Chips" starring Shaquille O'Neal, someone decided to take a piece of s**t and fling it onto the ceiling of the men's bathroom. What made this even worse was that it was winter time, and all the heating ducts were on full blast. The human turd was stuck to the ceiling and partially covering a heat vent. He said the bathroom smelled so wretched that they needed masks to walk in.
My aunt used to work for Sears. She said that people used to crap on the floor in the women's dressing room on a regular basis. Also, on the floor in the restroom. I fail to see the humor or the enjoyment in any of this, but some people are just disgusting pigs.
I once found a turd on the floor at work, and it was so out of context that I didn't know what it was. I thought it looked like the burnt edge of a pie or casserole or something (although it was a perfectly average looking turd). Trying to figure out what it was, I picked it up and sniffed it, DEEP. It even took me a second to identify the smell, I was like, this is so familiar.
>Trying to figure out what it was, I picked it up and sniffed it, DEEP.
Good thing you didn't decide to taste it. :)
The things you guys have to put up with at work! In my line of business we only have to worry about things like creep strength and butt fusion.
JohnL wrote:
> >Trying to figure out what it was, I picked it up and sniffed
> it, DEEP.
>
> Good thing you didn't decide to taste it. :)
I remember an old comedy routine that went something like that. After a lengthy process of determining that the object looks, feels, smells and tastes like s**t, the comic concludes that it must be s**t.
The punchline: "Boy, lucky I didn't step in it."
Taste it? GROSS! It was on the floor!
Worst job I ever had was cleaning the stalls at the local horse Race Track. The job last two whole days. On the second day I was shoveling horses**t from a stall where the thorobred horse was still in. As I lfted the shovel full of s**t the damn horse clamped down on my shoulder with his teeth. It almost took a chunk out of my skin. I turned around an hit him square between the eyes with the shovel. The b***h was, the owner just happened to be walking by at the time. End of job. Thank god.
Don't think I can top these but I'll contribute what I can recall:
A high school buddy used to work at the local Wendy's, and told us to avoid the chili since much of the beef was made up of the leftover hamburger patties from the previous day when the last shift had cooked too many patties. He also had various minor horror stories of stuff pulled from grease traps.
The worst thing I found at work once was an apparently used condom left lying on a table right in the middle of a busy work area. I work at a newspaper, so these things don't up everyday. One of my co-workers, a very demur church-going woman, discovered it at the same time and was on the very of screaming hysterics once she figured out what it was. I threw it away after picking it up with a old copy of the newspaper laying around. The bad part was that if I had to guess who put it there, a safe bet would be my then boss who was later fired for sexual harassment.