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I got a FB message from my cousin today wanting to "touch base and reconnect as we haven't heard from you for a long time".

Now, I know this sounds cruel coming from me but where the BLEEP were they in September when I was on the brink of suicide? If it wasn't for my landlords, my work mentor talking me down and you guys being there for me, I would have swallowed two packs of sleeping pills.

My cousin who made me feel like I was doing nothing for Mom now wants to talk to me again: I think not.

What do you think? Should I contact her?

I think it (almost) never hurts to talk to someone.

If you feel ready and want to talk to them ten go for it.

You have made your perspective clear.  Do you want to communicate with your cousin?  You must decide.  
I had two bad and worse conversations last fall with my own sister.  I have not spoken to her since.  The only time we ever "spoke" was when I called her (and she'd ramble on about herself and not once ask me ... "How are you?")  Both times we last spoke she hung up on me.  I have all of my life to look back on, remember, and I plan to never communicate with her again.  That is not, however, rooted in anger (which I've got) but really disgust and disinterest.  She is damaging in everyone's life and no one in my family liked her ever.  Except me; I was her friend (and regretted it).  I am almost sad, but I don't give a sh!t.  So, I think you have to really be DONE not to communicate.  Once you are THERE,   it   is   easy.  

Don`t even talk to her
Stay calm

I think you should talk to her only if you truly want to.

I also think it is very possible you may easily be pushed into doing things you would really rather not do simply because you feel doing what you want to do makes you less-than-nice.

So don't let yourself get 'guilted' into talking to her.

There is nothing wrong with not talking to someone whose behaviour toward you has been so hurtful.

Thanks Sister.

This is also the reason I haven't been on FB for a while.

I last heard from these people (my cousin, my mom's brother and his wife) in August last year when Mom was taken into care and yes, I owe my cuz because she sorted things for Mom and got her into care where Mom lives.

I've been paying for EVERYTHING since including her meds etc and I have never asked for a cent from them.

Again I ask: where were they when I needed them in September? When I was sitting on my bed looking at my pills and thinking that this would be the easy way out.

Yes, I owe them (and especially her) for helping Mom but not for the hell that she put me through. I feel very sorry for my cousin's life partner - a very nice person - sometimes.

 :bluesad: :bluesad:

You said twice you owe them.  Do you?  I understand you are not talking about money.  Or are you? 
If you owe them, by your own assessment not theirs, perhaps you need to unemotionally communicate your hurt or disappointment to your cousin.  I related my own story to you because our stories are similar, about family hurts.  If you are not DONE and want to, communicate.  But, take your time.

Thanks.

I owe my cousin for helping Mom out after she left the step down clinic getting her into a care facility: other than that, I owe her nothing, especially any money. I've been paying for her care ever since and I have not asked for, nor will I accept any financial help as I'm too proud to ask for it.

The fact was (and is) Mom is a very strong and outgoing person even at her age and to have her fall seriously ill like that was a huge shock for me: also the fact that if I didn't get worried about her not sounding right and asking her niece (my other cousin who lives next door to her) to please go check on her she would have died.

So, I just fell apart and haven't been the same since  :bluesad:

Have you made up your mind?   I spoke to my brother tonight and it was fine, we hadn't spoken in months.  He worries me.  With people you have not given up on, you can only keep trying.  We spoke briefly about our sister.  We laughed; she doesn't call him either.  Her I've given up on.  It's a choice. 

Thanks for asking: as of today, I haven't contacted her at all and I don't think I ever will.

Sounds like you've made up your mind.  Be strong, be flexible.   :thumbup: