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The best bad parts of bad movies.

Started by ghouck, July 26, 2009, 10:20:58 PM

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ghouck

I was watching something the other day, possible "Sheena" and something just didn't seem right. Later, I figured it out: A bunch of women in a jungle tribe had very perky breasts. I mean, no bra in sight, and some even looked like bolt-ons. I mean, you can't have jungle women not having flabby, floppy boobs, it just isn't right. Casting a woman with supermodel boobs as a jungle native is just absurd.

Anyways, what's some of your favorite things that make a movie bad?
Raw bacon is GREAT! It's like regular bacon, only faster, and it doesn't burn the roof of your mouth!

Happiness is green text in the "Stuff To Watch For" section.

James James: The man so nice, they named him twice.

"Aw man, this thong is chafing my balls" -Lloyd Kaufman in Poultrygeist.

"There's always time for lubricant" -Orlando Jones in Evolution

p1zl3

Over-the-top action gets me chuckling pretty good... Like people who leap off an exploding building, shoot three villains during the drop, roll and somehow are left with only minor scuff on their cheek...  :bouncegiggle:
Also post-kill one-liners are pretty much great...

Prime Examples:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxkr4wS7XqY

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Yc0OESVEQI

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kxYmEYBLgBE



:cheers:

hellbilly

#2
I love how evil manifest into a character that was played by some unknown actress from a private movie about a 300 year old witches curse screened at a party at a filmmakers house in Norman J. Warren's otherwise very entertaining supernatural proto-slasher Terror (1978).
Why the evil witch takes on the form of the witch character from the private movie remains a sloppy mystery and cheap cop out  :teddyr:

Leah

in plan 9, the ufo catching fire. FAIL!
yeah no.

The Burgomaster

Quote from: ghouck on July 26, 2009, 10:20:58 PM
I mean, you can't have jungle women not having flabby, floppy boobs, it just isn't right. Casting a woman with supermodel boobs as a jungle native is just absurd.

Not only that, they usually have perfect hair and sometimes even wear make-up.  Damn those jungle women!
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RCMerchant

The toy robot used bythe Ninja Empire to deliver a message in NINJA TERMINATOR-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThpdB-W89gg
Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)
Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."
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InformationGeek

I enjoy the so bad that it is awesome kind of special effects, like Jaws 3.  In the case of Jaws 4, the effects were so bad and so frequent that they lost the charm that could of made them so bad that it is awesome.
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RCMerchant

The cartoon-animated ...stuff...that REPTILICUS spits at people....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TFQqmHQMJBY

Plus-he looks likw Kukla from the old KUKLA FAN and OLLIE SHOW!
Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)
Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."
Slobber, Drool, Drip!
https://www.tumblr.com/ronmerchant

Mofo Rising

The completely inexplicable.

In most truly bad movies, there are scenes that just make no sense whatsoever. They seem to have no human referent whatsoever, in that you will never see anybody ever act in such a manner. More to the point they make no sense in the context of the movie you are watching. Why are those scenes there? Nobody knows.

A good example is the movie Troll 2. Almost every scene in that movie doesn't make a lick of sense. Nevermind that it is just a bad movie, these scenes could never possibly be construed as entertaining to anybody, except for the fact that some people just watch movies to see things go wrong. (That's me.)

And you can't fake that. Movies that try to do this, such as most Troma productions, fail on both levels.

Another good example, but less representative because it is completely awesome, is the "put on the glasses" scene from They Live. A ten minute pro-wrestling scene in the middle of the movie makes no sense when put up against the rest of the film. It's just there. It is, however, the defining point of that film, and what everybody who has ever seen it remembers. Great scene, just completely inexplicable.
Every dead body that is not exterminated becomes one of them. It gets up and kills. The people it kills, get up and kill.

Saucerman

Quote from: Mofo Rising on July 31, 2009, 04:45:06 AM

Another good example, but less representative because it is completely awesome, is the "put on the glasses" scene from They Live. A ten minute pro-wrestling scene in the middle of the movie makes no sense when put up against the rest of the film. It's just there. It is, however, the defining point of that film, and what everybody who has ever seen it remembers. Great scene, just completely inexplicable.

That fight was originally supposed to last 20 seconds.  But Piper and Keith David decided to have some fun.  John Carpenter was so pleased with the result that he left it in the film. 

Kester Pelagius

Quote from: ghouck on July 26, 2009, 10:20:58 PM
I was watching something the other day, possible "Sheena" and something just didn't seem right. Later, I figured it out: A bunch of women in a jungle tribe had very perky breasts. I mean, no bra in sight, and some even looked like bolt-ons. I mean, you can't have jungle women not having flabby, floppy boobs, it just isn't right. Casting a woman with supermodel boobs as a jungle native is just absurd.

Hold on.  The straight out of a hair salon hairdos, perfectly plucked eyebrows, and manicured nails didn't bother you nor the faux animal skin pseudo-bikini/dress that's really sewn together from a printed fabric.  (Thus raising all sorts of questions about sources of textiles in a jungle, not to mention the very important question of why a jungle girl would be wearing such restrictive clothing in the first place.  And don't even get me started on where a jungle girl finds the means to dye her hair blonde.)  That was perfectly reasonable.  But perky breasts made you sit up and go: HEY, WAIT A MINUTE, THIS AINT RIGHT!

:question:


Quote from: ghouck on July 26, 2009, 10:20:58 PMAnyways, what's some of your favorite things that make a movie bad?

Ludicrous dialogue spoken by actors who obviously know it's ludicrous but nevertheless plod through the scene reciting said dialogue.  Every bad movie has it's bad dialogue moment(s).  It's always fun to see how the actors handle these moments. Some sound like they're reciting a book report in front of a class of fifth graders, others take that dialogue and try to make it sound like Shakespeare.  It's friggin' hilarious.

:cheers:
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indianasmith

How almost every chase scene, at some point, involves a guy hanging off the landing skid of a helicopter.
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ghouck

Quote from: Kester Pelagius on July 31, 2009, 09:35:47 AM


Hold on.  The straight out of a hair salon hairdos, perfectly plucked eyebrows, and manicured nails didn't bother you nor the faux animal skin pseudo-bikini/dress that's really sewn together from a printed fabric.  (Thus raising all sorts of questions about sources of textiles in a jungle, not to mention the very important question of why a jungle girl would be wearing such restrictive clothing in the first place.  And don't even get me started on where a jungle girl finds the means to dye her hair blonde.)  That was perfectly reasonable.  But perky breasts made you sit up and go: HEY, WAIT A MINUTE, THIS AINT RIGHT!

:question:


She could be a cyclops with a clown wig and a full beard, but if her shirt is off, she might as well not even have a head, because I won't notice it.
Raw bacon is GREAT! It's like regular bacon, only faster, and it doesn't burn the roof of your mouth!

Happiness is green text in the "Stuff To Watch For" section.

James James: The man so nice, they named him twice.

"Aw man, this thong is chafing my balls" -Lloyd Kaufman in Poultrygeist.

"There's always time for lubricant" -Orlando Jones in Evolution

Jack

I think I've mentioned this a few (dozen) times before, but the whole tight-tank-top, run, fall in the water and be completely dry within 30 seconds thing is my favorite.  I also like identifying what type of Russian armored vehicles are supposedly protecting us Americans.  The fact that no matter how desperate and life threatening the situation, we're always just a heartbeat away from a makeout/sex scene is pretty cool too.
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