Its Alive

[systemcr4sh]

I've seen the third sequel in my local pawn shop. ITS ALIVE III: Island of The Alive. Is it any good? I like most of Larry Cohens' Other works.

Should I buy it? Its only like 6.99.

Is it worth it?

-Dan

[Joe Bannerman]

It's easily the worst of the three, but for $7, what the hey?

I mean, you can't go completely wrong with crazy babies, right?

Joe

[Squishy]

Michael Moriarity can be very, very good, or he can be very, very awful. In It's Alive III, he is psychotically awful, but that fits in with every other aspect of this crime against nature. The subplots and loose ends of the first two Alive movies are wrapped up in a totally-implausible courtroom scene at the very beginning, involving a full-view stop-motion-animated "Alive Baby;" after that, the script is allowed to circle the drain for what seems like an eternity. Some "Alive Babies" reach maturity in this one, which means stop-motion puppets are eventually abandoned in favor of people wearing masks and fangs. It totally reeks, but if you've seen the first two, you might as well end your curiosity--and interest in the series.

[Cullen]

I don't know about crime against nature or totally reeks, but "It's Alive III" isn't a very good movie.  In fact, I think it's safe to say that it's one of Cohen's worst.

Now, to put this in perspective, let me say that I've watched the first sequel and only a part of the original, and I didn't really care for what I saw.  I like some of Cohen's other works ("Q" and "God Told Me To", the latter more than the former), but as a rule, his stuff doesn't do anything for me.  (Pun intended)  I keep hoping for another "Q,” but keep getting "Return to Salem's Lot".  Which, of course, isn't a good thing.

Crime against nature, I think, is a little strong for IA3.  I remember a little thought going on there (which is typical with most of Cohen's films, even the bad ones.)  Which puts it heads above such charmers as "R.O.T.O.R" or, God help us, the other "It's Alive" (see below).  Plus, for me, it has the added benefit of vanishing utterly from my mind.  Haven't thought about IA3 in *years*.  Probably won't think of it again for years after this post.

Unlike "R.O.T.O.R.”  Ugh.

(Footnote: For those who haven't see or heard of it, there is another "It's Alive" out there.  I give you this small warning: Do not seek it out.  This IA is 1969 Larry Buchanan film staring Tommy Kirk as an innocent man trapped by a raving road-side exhibit owner.  The owner plans to throw Kirk to his pet dinosaur, who miraculously still lives, after centuries, in a cave beneath the owner’s house.

(This dinosaur, supposedly huge, is portrayed by a mime with ping pong ball eyes.  There is no way to describe the absolute...I mean...Geez...  No budget, no sense of scale... there are no words...  and I haven't even mentioned the annoying couple Kirk is trapped with, or the Flashback That Never, Ever Ends.  Somewhere in time and space I am still watching this movie.

(I was going to say anything that makes that make "King Kong v. Godzilla"'s special effects look like "Jurassic Park"'s has to be good, but what little good sense I had left started screaming at me.  Buchanan's IA even makes early "Doctor Who" FX seem quite modern.

(It hurts just thinking about it.)

[BoyScoutKevin]

Actually, I have seen both films entitled "It's Alive." And the one w/ Michael Moriarity is vastly superior to the one w/ Tommy Kirk. Though, it is interesting to see what type of films Tommy Kirk was making after he left Disney Studios. Enjoy!

[Squishy]

Oh, hell yeah, I've subjected myself to Larry Buchanan's It's Alive! That one'll make your lobe shrivel. I was quite young at the time, and kept wondering why people were talking about a giant dinosaur or monster, when all I was seeing was a skinny dude wearing a wetsuit and ping-pong balls. For absolutely no reason imaginable, there's a ripoff of the "rat-for-dinner" bit from Whatever Happened To Baby Jane? It's one of those "weekend" movies--one that appears to have been made, from conceptualization to premier, in the course of a weekend--but without the sort of imagination that, say, was put into Little Shop of Horrors or Stop! Or My Mom Will Do b*****e*. If the utter essence of a bowel movement could be captured and transformed into film, it would be It's Alive! It's Alive III: Island of the Alive still sucks blown chunks, though. I don't remember exactly, but with the meandering, go-nowhere script, it seems like it's three numb-assed hours long.

*just seeing if you're paying attention.