Megapiranha -

[peter johnson]

We had been staring at the box on the shelf for a bit, when the young woman who owns the video store said:  "Oh, yes - I saw the trailer.  It looked as if cardboard cutout fish were flying through the air to eat a helicopter." - - Several days later, I knew I had to have this -

This was a film made recently for the ScyFy network.  I do not get cable - I rely on rabbit ears.  Apparently, there is much I miss . . .

This is one of the laughably best worst films I have ever seen.  What makes it really great is the obvious fact that everyone in it was told they were making a serious horror film.  There is no winking at the camera.  There is no acknoledgement at all that they know they are doing poo.  They, the actors involved, including the head Brady Bunch older brother, do not understand they are present at the creation of Badness.  My God and Saints preserve us:  There is a Blooper Reel as an extra . . . The existence of this begs the Question:  How could they tell?

The CGI is not only apalling, it is repeated, re. the same scene is used multiple times to indicate different action.  The models are poo:  There are numerous scenes where the dead pirhanha fish are not only dead plastic, but seamed together, and there are even CLOSEUPS of the joining seams in the plastic, in case anyone missed it.

The fish do fly through the air to eat people.  They also explode without warning, and, I emphasize, tWITH NO EXPLANATION AT ALL AS TO WHY THEY EXPLODE!!

Repeated scenes show closeups of the hero doing nothing at all.  Repeated useless scenes of Spanish speaking bad guys who do bad things for no reason other than to BE LOUD!! and be Spanish.  and be evil.  The dialogue and writing is below bottom-barrel:  "These fish are groteseque and numerous!  And we created them!!"

Folks, the wife and I laughed ourselves out . . . just out . . . nothing left . . . This is one of the single worst things either of us have seen in years.  We loved, loved, loved it without reservation.  Stock Footage!!  Dubbed vocals!!  Mismatched and incoherent scenes!!  Tiffany!!!!!  Sudden Love Interest with no Buildup whatever!!
Interiors and Exteriors of Power Plants and Oil Refineries subbing for Secret Military Bases - Repeatedly!!  My lawd:  They couldn't even afford a single real helicopter - one of the single most ubiquitous and cheap forms of air travel available in Hollywood - no, instead we get numerous shots of a control-panel set & then CGI helicopters. 

This film(?) fails on so many levels, that it is difficult and challenging to list them.  Who else has seen this?  Share!!

peter johnson/denny "I cannot believe what I just saw . . " crane

[claws]

Sounds fun but I haven't watched it yet. Here's the other Mega Piranha thread: http://www.badmovies.org/forum/index.php/topic,129635.0.html

[Dennis]

This film was on the SyFy network again yesterday along with the classic "Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus",  and although both are hilariously awful I resisted the temptation to watch them, mainly because they're really not amusing the second time around.

[WingedSerpent]

I saw this last night as well.  I thought it was a really enjoyable bad movie.  Yes, it wouldn't hold up under repeated views and some of the plot holes are blantanly obvious, but I found myself having a good time watching it.  How could not love the sene with the navy seal kicking mutant piranha out of the air.

[Jack]

I saw the last part of it last night because I was programming the DVD recorder to get Super Gator or something.  I was lucky enough to catch the piranha leaping out of the water and eating the helicopter.  Wow...just, wow.  Makes that Megashark movie look like Star Wars in comparison.

[Doggett]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pFhSogGnu4I

[peter johnson]

Oh, Boy!  The trailer Doggett posts is great - Yes, this is how bad it really is - I can't believe they use some of the most ridiculous footage, eg., the fish being kicked out of the air by the Hero, as a tease to get people to watch it.  Notice that they can't even afford fake blood - Notice how they just color-filter red at the bottom of the screen to indicate blood?  This is incredible - even the film I'm working on now, "The Future Belongs to Undead Gods", with a 4-figure budget, can afford FAKE BLOOD for goodness' sake!!

Just see this, if you haven't already . . . See it . . . See it now!!  And then get back to us . . .

peter johnson/denny "I'm still high!" crane

[3mnkids]

The kids and I watched it this weekend and enjoyed it. We laughed our asses off the entire movie. It was funny how the size of the piranha kept changing. It would be huge and then normal looking. When one of the piranhas jumps over trees and can be seen in slow motion going over the guys head we all cracked up. It was hilarious.

[Flick James]

But does it have John Voight doing a horrible and unidentifiable accent? If it did, it sounds like the perfect storm.

[Dr. Whom]

My God, it even has one hit wonder Tiffany in it!

[Andrew]

And I finally watched this last night, which kept me up until 1 am.  At that point I tried to go to sleep, but Garrett woke up with a nosebleed (probably the dry air) and freaked out, which kept me up until 2 am.

The best part of this movie had to be that the giant piranhas (the size of a car or bus) would jump out of the water to crash into buildings, and then the buildings would explode.  Why the government was so keen to kill the mutant fish is beyond me, because they effectively killed themselves whenever possible.  It was like watching a stereotypical lemming suicide myth, only with fish instead of little rodents.

It is darn funny to see a huge fish jump out of the water to crash into a building, then explode.  The piranhas also eat boats, a warship ship (it goes from a destroyer to a battleship, depending on the shot), and a nuclear submarine.

Tiffany's acting is just terrible, and it's even worse than the male lead.  He sounds like he's trying to sound gruff.  I'm also certain that he was hired more for his physique than anything else.  All of the jokes about the lead in Space Mutiny (Blast Thickneck, Lump Beefcake, etc.) could easily apply to this character.

The final battle between the divers and the giant, ship-eating piranhas is insane.  It's insane that they actually shot and used that footage.  I'm dead certain that the 20mm firearms that they use are actually nerf guns painted black.  And the divers only kill one of the many piranhas!?  Why is everybody so happy?  There are still a horde of giant killer, hotel-smashing fish on the loose!

[Nukie 2]

Oh boy, the cars being driven in the case scene changed multiple times!