The Incredible Melting Man

[J.R.]

Whew, just caught this one last night and I'm proud to say I'm a survivor. It's one of those films that moves along like a fever dream, if you know what I mean. Stuff happens, with no tension or investment in the proceedings, so basically it's just a slideshow of stuff happening. An astronaut who flew to Saturn's rings in 1977 (we've talked about this before) gets irradiated and upon his return to Earth he begins melting. He escapes from one p**s-poor military hospital (it looks maybe a little better than a large storage locker) and kills people by touch, sucking their cells out so that he can live longer. The search for this dangerous and unstoppable killing machine is handled by two dense scientists, who seem to be searching in their spare time. He's runing through heavily-wooded areas in Northern California, so they drive around country roads pretty much whenever they feel like it. It goes on like this for about an hour and a half, until the Melting Man is cornered in an electrical plant, where one of the scientists keeps stopping police from shooting him, despite the fact that he's a mass murderer who kills by touch and will not stop. Like I said, dense. Anyhoo, the Melting Man, uh, melts, and the main "hero", who is expecting a child with his wife and has been the only somewhat likeable character thus far, is shot in the head and forgotten. The End. A stinker to be catalogued in the halls of Pergatory. It does have decent makeup effects by Rick Baker. A side note, I remembered that MST3K did this movie in season seven, so I looked it up in the Amzing Collossal Episode Guide, and sure enough they consider this to be in a tie with Manos as the worst film they ever did.

[Bree]

I saw the MST3K version and it definitely helps to have those wisecracks. Otherwise, I don't think I could have made it all the way through.

[Steven Millan]

                    A William Sachs film...released by American International Pictures...featuring mucho Rick Baker gore...Cheryl "Rainbeaux" Smith contributes a nude cameo...cool looking melting man...Joe Dante cameo...
                    It sounds all cool to me(God bless the 70s' genre films).

[Squishy]

Yes, thank God for the Satellite of Love. Honestly, the script could've been thrown together by any pair of ten-year-olds in a single afternoon--although that might not be fair to ten-year-olds. I was writing crappy, gimmick-based junk like this in elementary school. How come no one in Hollywood gave ME a contract?

"He seems to get stronger as he melts!!" Oh, jeez...

[J.R.]

The most disturbing part of this is the horny eighty-year0old couple. They're necking and making akward innuendo and it's just wrong. The worst is this- they stop in an orchard to steal some lemons and the old woman lifts up her skirt and says, "put them in here". Eeewww...

[john]

I saw this movie once on a creature-feature years ago. I don't really remember it that well though.

 What sticks in my mind is that there was an ad in Famous Monsters magazine for a Melting Man mask kit that would supposedly result in a professional quality mask. I wanted to get it, but I believe at the time it cost a fortune, like $30! (I was young!) :)

[jmc]

I too saw it on a creature feature when I was a kid.   I don't know what I would have thought of it today, but it doesn't sound as horrendous as MANOS, for instance.

[Flangepart]

Oh, yeah. I', with Bree ond the Squishmister on this . Painfull! The scientest/bulletspunge keeps yelling his name and title at the cops. Sure, that'll impress 'em! And the old geezers....ewwww! I'll never eat raw lemons agine!

[Jim]

I never did see this movie, but i remember it winning the sci-fi/fantasy award for best special effects...I remember it was up against Shatner's "Kingdom of the Spiders' who gave out the award. Shatner even sang a version of Elton Johns 'Rocket Man" that night....no wonder they don't broadcast those awards anymore..(or do they?)

[Luke Bannon]

Sure I read about it in a 'Cult Science Fiction Film' book. They described it as 'cheap and nasty' which I think sums it up Ok