Life imitates b-movies

[Andrew]

Huge bird sighted in Alaska:
http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story2&cid=573&ncid=757&e=3&u=/nm/20021018/od_nm/environment_bird_dc

Now, who wants to bet that a mysterious floating island will turn up and (Gamera) will awake from his timeless slumber?

[Chadzilla]

There hasn't been a rash of skinned bodies (or heart removals) in Anchorage or someplace, has there?

Just checking.

Then again it could be that there anti-matter buzzard!  Back and looking for a place to nest.  Heheheheheh.

[Dano]

Evil capitalist guy:  "Find it!  Kill it!  Put its stuffed carcass in my travelling carnival!!"

Bright dorky scientist:  "Why this could possibly be some lost species of the Aquila Australopothecus trapped in an Alaskan glacier for millions of years and freed by global warming.  I wonder what other creatures of the neo-Cretacious period might be awakening!"

Undereducated diner waitress:  "Why, you don't think one of them Aquilo-peekies might come and awaken right HERE, do you???"

Cocky bush pilot:  "I've flown from one end of the Klondike to the other and I ain't seen no giant birds that are gonna keep me from my route."

Kid in baseball cap:  "Has anyone seen my dog Spot?"

Portly sherriff:  "Okay folks, now let's not all get in a panic.  Probably Old Man McGinty just had a few too many at Rudy's last night."

Old Man McGinty: [dead]

Doctor:  "I'm afraid Old Man McGinty is dead.  I can't be certain until I get him to the ME's office in Anchorage, but the cause of death appears to have been massive exsanguination from a series of gargantuan talon wounds.  But let's not get carried away just yet."

Inuit mystic:  "AKA-DOOGA!  AKA-DOOGA!"

Heroic local guy about to have his 15 minutes of fame:  "Well, let's say for a moment that some gigantic prehistoric bird worshipped by the Eskimos as a god HAS come back to life.  How do we kill it, professor?"

Heroic local guys schoolteacher girlfriend:  "You boys have fun talking about your prehistoric monsters.  I'm late.  We're taking the class up to Craggy Peak today to look for egret nests."

The poster and trailer will say: "Based on a true story."

[Chadzilla]

My god man, with a plot like that, we can't lose!

[Flangepart]

Could be the american "Rodan".
....With Bill Pullman as the Cockey bush pilot. Dabny Coleman as the Ev-il Capitalist. and Meg Ryan as the Girlfriend.

[Fearless Freep]

Gotta have Brendan Gleeson as the sheriff :)

[Gerry]

Flangepart wrote:
>
> Could be the american "Rodan".
> ....With Bill Pullman as the Cockey bush pilot. Dabny Coleman
> as the Ev-il Capitalist. and Meg Ryan as the Girlfriend.

Swap out Bill Pullman and Meg Ryan with Pierce Brosnan and Linda Hamilton and you've got a deal.

[Chadzilla]

Jeff Goldblum IS the nerdy science guy, but you could get Oliver Platt if Goldblum wasn't available.  Leonard Nimoy could be the elderly scientist that is the nerd's mentor/father figure (gotta have a troubled childhood trauma linked to flying or something) that gets scarfed down near the beginning, after one of those necessary for the plot "Listen lowly grasshopper, and learn" moments about being careful and logical and not following your gut instincts all the time.

[Fearless Freep]

Jeff Goldblum IS the nerdy science guy

Yeah, but I wouldn't mind seeing Brent Spiner in that role.

Leobard Nimoy could be the elderly scientist mentor that gets scarfed

"Logically, I know that creature cannot exist so therefore I know logically, it is just an illusion and.." *Chomp!*

[AndyC]

Nobody mentioned the mayor of the town:

"The annual snow festival is three days away, and we can't let talk of a giant man-eating bird scare away the tourists. We've got to keep this quiet and go ahead with the festival as planned"

[Chadzilla]

Keanu Reeves IS the irritating Snowboarding dude who tries to outrace the bird, only to have the bird snarf him down down at the height of a totally radical jump...

...just so b-movie fans can go YYYYYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Gary Busey can play his dad.  hehehehe
:-)

[Chadzilla]

AndyC wrote:
>
> Nobody mentioned the mayor of the town:
>
> "The annual snow festival is three days away, and we can't
> let talk of a giant man-eating bird scare away the tourists.
> We've got to keep this quiet and go ahead with the festival
> as planned"

Louis Gossett Jr IS the Mayor (get Corbin Bernsen if Gossett can't make it)

[Mofo Rising]

You guys laugh if you must.  But when I succesfully capture that bird and control it using my newly developed electroencephalographic technology, you won't be laughing so hard.

Oh no, you won't be laughing then.