Things you Never Knew About SUPERARGO (1968)

[Flangepart]

From the company that brought you SUPER-CAR...
SUPER-ARGO! It drives, it flies, it swims, and it  serves great Italian dinners!

[Mr. Lobo]

Leggo my Argo!

[Just Plain Horse]

Things I Thought I'd Learned From Superargo & The Faceless Giants:

*Such a title is, among other things, incorrect when said "faceless giants" are niether giants nor do they lack faces*

*You're in bad shape when the best person you can find to help you locate a missing family member is a former wrestler who wears a silly red pajama like "uniform"*

*Fast cars can squeal out on a dirt road*

*Superargo cannot drive; in fact, he doesn't even have a learner's permit*

*Wreslters worldwide are as nutty as squirrel s**t*

*To make a lumbering, slow, semi-ineffectual "faceless giant", you need an athlete at the peak of perfection*

*Really bad dubbing can actually damage film stock*

*The folks at Mystery Science Theater 3000 passed on this one in favor of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, despite the fact the two films are nearly identical in tone, believability and ridiculousness. Just replace annoying kids and a nearly incoherent Santa Claus with Superargo and lots of wrestling moves*




"Superargo's in great shape and he looks ready for anything"
"Uh, how can you tell with that dumb bodysuit he's got on?"

[Mr. Lobo]

Super Observations, Horse!
"Santo Claus Conquers the Martian Giants!". I've heard the faceless coment before...But I cut them some slack since they did try with the pantyhose over the head thing. I never would have thought about the tires...Mr. Lobo is not a gearhead by any stretch of the word. I would have bought the squealing...But  I also think you need to be an super athelete to support that headgear! Did they ever do SuperArgo on MST?

Thanks for playing,
TV's Mr. Lobo
of Cinema Insomnia

[Just Plain Horse]

Mr. Lobo wrote:

> Super Observations, Horse!
> "Santo Claus Conquers the Martian Giants!". I've heard the
> faceless coment before...But I cut them some slack since they
> did try with the pantyhose over the head thing. I never would
> have thought about the tires...Mr. Lobo is not a gearhead by
> any stretch of the word. I would have bought the
> squealing...But  I also think you need to be an super athelete
> to support that headgear! Did they ever do SuperArgo on MST?
>
> Thanks for playing,
> TV's Mr. Lobo
> of Cinema Insomnia
>

Alas, no, never on MST3k. I can just see the zombie/robot/ faceless giants walking into a bank and the secuirty guard going, "Boys, you got panties on yer heds." I once caught this movie on- big surprise- late at night on a local cable channel, and was reminded of it years later when MST3K did Diabolik; the guy voicing the "mr. Wilson" guy during the train sequence did some of the dubbing for that film... when I heard that voice I exlaimed, "SUPERARGO!!" which was pretty pointless, as we all know Superargo retired after a steriod abuse scandal and he refuses to show himself to anyone since...

I couldn't get over how inept Superargo was; he tells people to intrust their life in his hands, and he not only let's them get captured, but is then waylayed by a measily oil slick. Snidely Whiplash could've defeated Superargo! Old wrestling scenes amuse me simply for the image of watching those people impact on what is clearly not a soft, padded surface. Old time wrestlers went down hard, cut themselves with razors and all manner of crap. It's like watching Larry of the 3 Stooges get slapped- its for real, and you know it hurts.

The aforementioned "Faceless Giants" left me thinking WTF?!?! You go to the trouble of catching well guarded athletes that could be turned into something like the Terminator, and instead, they come out like senior citizens on steriods. Why not just use the homeless? People would succumb to the smell before they got pounded to a pulp. Somehow, I can't help but think one well placed bullit would stop a "Faceless Giant"...

Thanks for the appreciation; in time, I'll do some more super-inside-secret- insights of movies most people wouldn't know of... well, maybe a couple...

No stupid oneliners,
no catchy jingle,
Just Plain Horse

[Mr. Lobo]

Thanks for the response.
You must be a writer or critic--your stuff is good.
Please feel free to keep ideas flowing...although, I must warn you I may be tempted to steal them.

"Superargo" was a lot of fun when we did it on "Cinema Insomnia"...We even had a guy in a Superago costume and we shot the episode in Superargoscope! (two thirds of the picture is off screen) When we were transfering the film we noticed a lot of noses talking to each other and that inspired the gimmick.

Watch it online Saturday Night at The Movie Crypt:

http://www.themoviecrypt.com.

Your Super Host,
Mr. Lobo

[Just Plain Horse]

Mr. Lobo wrote:

> Thanks for the response.
> You must be a writer or critic--your stuff is good.
> Please feel free to keep ideas flowing...although, I must warn
> you I may be tempted to steal them.
>
> "Superargo" was a lot of fun when we did it on "Cinema
> Insomnia"...We even had a guy in a Superago costume and we shot
> the episode in Superargoscope! (two thirds of the picture is
> off screen) When we were transfering the film we noticed a lot
> of noses talking to each other and that inspired the gimmick.
>


Writer, maybe- critic, never. I like too many crappy movies to be a critic. I'm more comfortable having someone steal my ideas if they tell me they're going to first. This is very common in Hollywood, except they lie and say both groups had the same basic idea at the same exact time... you don't work for Disney do you?

Yeah, a lot of international movies lose a great deal when they get the "fullscreen" treament, because they were meant to be seen widescreen... another reason why television sucks...

[Mr. Lobo]

I've learned to embrace it's limitations.

[Flangepart]

Just plain Horse : Isen't watching crappy movies what movie criticing is all about?

SUPERARGO : Its not just for a light brunch anymore!

[Just Plain Horse]

Flangepart wrote:

> Just plain Horse : Isen't watching crappy movies what movie
> criticing is all about?
>

*Shrugs shoulders* Beats me; I used to assume a critic's job was to hate everything that wasn't exactly what they wanted and praise whatever they were paid to. Critics don't add to the movie watching experience... or so I used to think; I never really considered the MST3k guys to be critics- although they did critize films and even had some interesting points to make on the subject- because they added to the experience. Critics just watch movies because its how they make a living, some of them turn out to be "bad" (and by my definition, formulaic "beating a dead horse" for a few bucks kind of bad... movies made for money, no other incentives); they are paid to say "I saw this and here's my opinion", I don't find that positive or stimulating- and therefore, they are critics. I guess that's my perspective. I'm not going to start comparing the finer points of "King Kong Escapes" to "King Kong vs. Godzilla" just because I MAY be or may not be a critic (I think perspective matters more here) or because I liked one slightly more than the other. My opinion is just that- an opinion- it's not that important to others, and anybody can say "I liked this one because..." or "I hated this one because..."

Critics use the wrong names for monsters in Godzilla movies, like calling Gigan "Borodan, the black chicken", or saying Baragon was in "Godzilla vs. Megalon". Critics write absurdly long books about every movie they've seen and give "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" the same overall rating as "Laserblast". Congrats, you just wasted thousands of old- growth forest to tell us how much you liked "Hard Day's Night". I guess I'm saying "I don't like critics even though I may well be one". D'oh!

[Flangepart]

Critics who get story facts wrong irk me too. Other then that, they are just people with an opinion, and a talent (?) for saying it. Andrew writes well, so its fun to read. As for agreeing...eh, to each his own.