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Stupidest peon deaths?

Started by Jim H, November 13, 2005, 01:11:02 AM

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Jim H

November 13, 2005, 01:11:02 AM
Anyone know any really stupid action movie peon deaths?  Peons are the nameless, usually silent guys who work for the main villain and serve mostly as fodder for the heroes.  Best example is the army of people Arnie kills at the end of Commando..

Often times these guys do incredibly stupid things to get themselves killed.  What made me think of this is one of the funniest I've seen...  In Chill Factor, the main characters are driving a semi truck on a narrow road at like 40 miles an hour, when a guy zooms down on a wire directly in front of them and shoots at them...  Even if he'd killed them, the 5 ton truck STILL would have smashed into him, splattering him.  Best part of that entire movie actually..

Neville

#1
November 13, 2005, 07:48:23 AM
Al Leong, the standard oriental goon in many Joel Silver and lesser movies, is last seen in "Death Warrant" having his head shoved inside a drying machine by Jean Claude Van Damme.

Due to the horrifying nature of this film, no one will be admitted to the theatre.

Neon Noodle

#2
November 13, 2005, 08:42:32 PM
The cop in "Wrong Turn" - talks to the main character for about 20 seconds before getting an arrow through his eye socket.

Then there's the standard character who is either about to retire or get married. You just know they're gonna get wasted.

____________________________________________________________
While on a journey, Chuang Tzu found an old skull, dry and parched.
With sorrow, he questioned and lamented the end of all things.
When he finished speaking, he dragged the skull over and, using it for a pillow, lay down to sleep.
In the night, the skull came to his dreams and said, 'You are a fool to rejoice in the entanglements of life.'
Chuang Tzu couldn`t believe this and asked, 'If I could return you to your life, you would want that, wouldn`t you?'
Stunned by Chuang Tzu`s foolishness, the skull replied, 'How do you know that it is bad to be dead?'

-From The Matrix: The Path of Neo

Zapranoth

#3
November 13, 2005, 09:15:40 PM
He wasn't a peon (he was a main character, I guess you'd have to say) --  

Doolittle, at the end of "Dark Star," surfing down onto an atmosphere on a piece of ship's hull.

(Not saying I didn't like it.  Just that it was stupid.)

Scottie

#4
November 13, 2005, 10:02:23 PM
Raiders of the Lost Arc- The muscley guy with the sword challenging  Harrison Ford in the market, who in classic fashion, gets shot. Best fodder death ever.

In the same movie, how about the no-shirted muscley boxer guy Ford has to fight while avoiding the props of an airplane in the desert? The no-shirted guy didn't avoid the props.

___<br />Spongebob: What could be better than serving up smiles? <br />Squidward: Being Dead.

LilCerberus

#5
November 14, 2005, 12:49:40 AM
The final showdown in FireStarter.
One of the scientists tries to escape in a golf cart which has a top speed of about four mph. Laziness in the face of terror.
And when the security guards start running out of bullets, they fall to their knees whining "No, no".

It's as though none of these guys ever heard of a little tactic called RUNNING.

"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.

Just Plain Horse

#6
November 14, 2005, 12:15:57 PM
The guys in Firestarter are an excellent example... I tend to think of any Asian guy in a Chuck Norris movie or one of those American Ninja movies. You'd think people hire mercenaries like short order cooks if you believe these movies. Oh, and how about the red turban guy who fights Sub-Zero in the first Mortal Kombat movie? Maybe he was some sort of religious fanatic or something... and how many people have actually died from getting a throwing star in the back? You can stop those things with the palm of your hand! (it hurts, but it beats taking one to the eye or groin...)

Shadowphile

#7
November 15, 2005, 12:30:58 AM
In Red Sonja a woman is killed by having a shuriken thrown at her.  The problem is, she is wearing a BREASTPLATE and the shuriken strikes right in the centre AND DOESN'T GO IN FAR ENOUGH TO PENETRATE.

Also, the villianess has a wizard, who just stands there whimpering as Red Sonja walks up to him and very casually hacks his head off.

LilCerberus

#8
November 15, 2005, 10:28:02 PM
Impulse (1984)
The final scene is not only stupid, but laughably cliched.
First, the government agent trying to kill everyone doesn't notice this big ol' worn out pickup driving up behind him, and when he does notice, he steps forward & positions himself in front the tailgate of his van.
Spoiler alert? C'mon, how many guesses do you need?

"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.

ulthar

#9
November 15, 2005, 11:33:39 PM
Final sequence in Beverley Hills Cop.  Eddie Murphy with a snubby .38 against multiple dudes with full auto's.

Yeah, that's realistic.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Professor Hathaway:  I noticed you stopped stuttering.
Bodie:      I've been giving myself shock treatments.
Professor Hathaway: Up the voltage.

--Real Genius

Flangepart

#10
November 16, 2005, 06:35:07 PM
Imperial Stormtroopers? Meh, its too obvious...

ANY soldier/guard who, on hearing a gun fight ,run to the scene of action...without checking to see WHO is shooting WHO from WHERE!
Two words, you goons...POCKET MIRRIOR! How many evil minions could be saved with such a simple device.....sad realy...

"Aggressivlly eccentric, and proud of it!"

Just Plain Horse

#11
November 17, 2005, 09:38:19 AM
ulthar wrote:

> Final sequence in Beverley Hills Cop.  Eddie Murphy with a
> snubby .38 against multiple dudes with full auto's.
>
> Yeah, that's realistic.
>

They didn't kill him, but his career died that day...

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