Recent viewings

[Rev. Powell]

MST3K: SANTA CLAUS:  Yeah, the Mexican movie where Santa Claus lives on a cloud island in space with Merlin and fights the Devil.  There is no way this could not be entertaining; this is one I'd love to see without the commentary.  Pretty easy for the guys to joke about; it only needs a little nudge to make it utterly hilarious.  The host segments are a bit of a let down but with a movie this insane and cheesy it doesn't matter.  4.5/5.

[Cthulhu]

Uzumaki

What the hell?
I really don't know what to make of this.
I guess I liked it...althrough the ending could've made more sense.

I was gonna suggest this to Rev, but someone has already beat me to it.

[indianasmith]

that one was strange all right!!

I think I have a review of it on here somewhere.

[Jack]

The Rig (2010) - An offshore oil rig is evacuated due to a coming storm, but a small skeleton crew stays behind and is attacked by a monster.  This was actually pretty good.  The characters weren't especially sympathetic, but they were developed and felt, more or less, like real people.  The monster was surprisingly well done, probably because they only showed brief glimpses of it for the most part.  The action moved along at an acceptable pace.  Definitely not a must-see or anything, but a cut above what I was expecting.  3.75/5.

[claws]

The Ring Two: Unrated (2005)

Uneven, wretched and silly yet in some strange train wreck way entertaining because over-the-top ridiculous. Because of that I'm pretty sure it was a crowd pleaser during its theatrical run. Which should also explain its impressive box office figures. 3.25/5

[Cthulhu]

that one was strange all right!!

I think I have a review of it on here somewhere.

Are you sure?
I'd like to read it, but I can't seem to find it.

[ulthar]

I AM DAVID (2003)

Historical drama about a boy's escape from a Bulgarian labor camp post WWII.  Very engaging and well made.

4.5 out of 5 for me.

THE LAST WARRIOR (2000)

(Interestingly, IMDB lists the title as THE LAST PATROL, even with the cover art right there on the page with WARRIOR...oh well).

Mind numbingly bad 'story' about California breaking off from a large earthquake.  Given that since then, other quake movies have exceeded 9.5, the 'scale' issue here is pretty funny.

Dolph Lungren is the titular "Last Warrior," though I'm not really sure why since there are other military characters.  I guess they lack his heart or something.

This one is full of enormous plot holes, nonsensical story and it's just an all around mess.  Given all of that, it was a lot of fun to just watch for what it is.

If you want a drinking game for this one, take a swig every time Lungren (or one of the others) pulls some completely ridiculous conclusion out of their rear end.  You'll be smashed by the end of the first act and comatose by the end of the movie.

Gotta go with 2.5 out of 5...really, really bad, but fun in a masochistic way.

EVERYTHING IS ILLUMINATED (2005)

Elijah Wood on another ring quest (ooops, slight spoiler there). 

Actually, he plays an American Jew in search of family history in modern Ukraine.  He looks for the town where his now deceased grandfather escaped the Nazi's with help from quirky guides from Odessa.  Ukrainian Alex (played by Eugene Hutz) is the high point, as he leads "Jonfen" (vice Jonathan) on his "very rigid search."

Engaging story that is more comedy in the first half and more serious drama in the latter half.  The comedy is REALLY funny, and the drama is quite touching.  I really liked this movie, but the elements with the Ukrainian Grandfather I felt were not sufficiently explored to really understand what was going on there.

Great Indy film, in my opinion with very strong characterization and acting, even if the story leaves a few holes here and there.  I've read that the book goes into the history a bit more deeply and looks like it will be worth a read.

Strong directorial debut from Liev Schrieber, and I give it 4.5 out of 5.

[Rev. Powell]

CRUCIBLE OF HORROR (1970):  A mother and daughter hatch a plan to kill the family's cruel patriarch.  Reasonably well made, except for the fact that this dull ripoff of much better thrillers never should have been made.  1.5/5.

C ME DANCE (2009): A teenage girl who loves the ballet is simultaneously struck with leukemia and the power to convert unbelievers to Christianity.  Ridiculous and amateurish, but there's something charming about its sincerity, and it's surprisingly easy to watch (and gently mock) in an "ABC After School Special" sort of way. 2/5. 

[lester1/2jr]

would strongly disagree w/ rev powell about c me dance, did not find it in any way charming.

Revenge of the Ninja - I like when he beat up the Village People

4/5

[Rev. Powell]

would strongly disagree w/ rev powell about c me dance, did not find it in any way charming.

Forgot to give lester1/2jr credit for reminding me to check this one out.  As far as charming, what I meant is charming in its amateur badness like an Ed Wood movie.  The guy who made this is clearly sincere and means well, he's just a really bad filmmaker. When you make fun of it you feel like being kind of gentle about it, rather than hateful as you would be with something that was produced with a cynical corporate mindset. 

[lester1/2jr]

The director played the dad I think.

[InformationGeek]

that one was strange all right!!

I think I have a review of it on here somewhere.

Are you sure?
I'd like to read it, but I can't seem to find it.

I personally did a review on Uzumaki, so feel free to look into it.  Rev also did a review on it I think.

Strange doesn't cover it.  The movie took many elements from the original manga, which was far more distrubing and weird.  You do not often see preganent women taking drills to people's skulls so they can suck blood out of them or see what happens when there are too many people in one building.

I guess I liked it...althrough the ending could've made more sense.

I can tell you why the ending didn't make sense.  They were following the manga to some extent, but the film came out before it even finished, so ending became totally radical and thus makes no sense.  All of those things the reporter is looking into never happen in the comic.

[indianasmith]

Last night I watchedarather bleak film called WINTER'S BONE.  a 17 year old daughter of a Missouri Ozarks meth cooker has to find her father when he places the family's land abd house against his bail, then fails to appear in court.  Well acted but very depressing,.

[Couchtr26]

The Bloody Vampire - Got a Mill Creek 20 pack (Undead Nightmares).  Anyway, Mexican vampire film rather enjoyable.  I would have liked a version with subtitles rather then dubbed.  There are a couple of odd moments where things may have been explained better.  Liked the bat as well, a three ft. bat flying around with rabbit ears. 

[Jack]

Skinwalkers (2006) - there's these two groups of werewolves - one is good, they don't eat people, they just tie themselves up so they can't move when the moon is full.  The other group is bad, they like to dine upon us tender humans.  And there's some legend  where if this 12 year old kid turns 13, the werewolf curse will be ended.  So the bad werewolves want to kill the kid because they enjoy being the way they are, and the good guys try to protect him.  Frickin' precocious little turd and his clueless mom.  There's lots of shootouts and werewolf fistfights.  I didn't care if everybody died.  Jason Behr (you may remember him from such TV shows as Roswell) is the head bad guy, and probably the most interesting character in the movie.  It was kind of slow moving too, and dragged on too long at the end.  No, I don't give a damn if everybody lives happily ever after - just roll the credits please.  3/5.