Recent viewings

[claws]

The Innocent (2006)

Four friends celebrate the last day of spring break camping in the woods. How odd, but this film was made in the UK. Besides, I never knew they did the spring break thing in England. But I digress. Anyway, they do drugs, fool around and find an old hotel. Once inside they discover spirits of murdered children. And yeah, we also get to see a few yellow-ish flashbacks about a mean mother stabbing (?) her son. They leave the hotel and one girl is killed by a naked man. One dude disappears into darkness. The other girl locks herself into a bedroom and screams. The remaining guy runs back into the hotel and, the movie ends.

This turd has a running time of 69 minutes, ten minutes alone for the opening and end credits done M. Night Shyamalan style.
Calling The Innocent a film is actually stretching it. This was shot with something that looks like a cell phone cam and to top it off, shot mostly in complete darkness. I kid you not when I say that you could barely make out what was happening on screen. Boring blackness that made no sense. 0/5

[retrorussell]

Star Wars Ep. III.  I still love it and it's miles better than I and (especially) II.  But yeah, the FrankenVader at the end was pretty weak.

[lester1/2jr]

alan- thye are both heavy on the science.

[JaseSF]

Escape To Witch Mountain (1975): Tia and Tony (Kim Richards and Ike Eisenmann), two orphan siblings with extraordinary powers including telepathy, telekinesis and the ability to talk to animals, become the target of ruthless millionaire Aristotle Bolt (Ray Milland) and his lead henchman Lucas Deranian (Donald Pleasance) who want to use and exploit the kids' powers for their own purposes. Eventually Tia and Tony end up on the run, with the villains in hot pursuit, where they befriend a cynical and lonely widower named Jason O'Day (Eddie Albert).

This family fantasy/sci-fi adventure film is a lot of fun. It moves really well, features a great cast and has terrific moments of drama, comedy and adventure. The villains do seem a little over the top stereotypical, in fact Bolt reminds me quite a bit of Lex Luthor but Albert proves a likable supporting figure here for our young heroes whose powers actually seem to mimic, well, Aquaman albeit on land as well as in the water. The animals, including a cat, horse and bear, tend to steal the show whenever they appear. **** out of ***** stars.

Return From Witch Mountain (1978): Tia and Tony (Kim Richards and Ike Eisenmann) are back, this time on vacation from Witch Mountain in Los Angeles where they get sidetracked following a vision of a man falling from the roof of a tall building. Tony goes to save the man but by doing so is noticed by mad scientist Victor (Christopher Lee) who's created a mind control device. Victor and his villainous sidekicks, his financier Letha (Bette Davis) and her nephew and muscle Sickle (Anthony James) kidnap the boy and plot to use him and his powers for their own gain with Victor having designs on world control and Letha seeing vast dollar signs. Tia meanwhile while searching for her missing brother befriends a "gang" of young boys who call themselves the Earthquakes and want to be toughs although in reality they are far from it. Anyways the boys agree to help Tia in her search but in won't be easy to reunite with her brother given his mind is being controlled by the devious Victor.

This sequel, while it has its fun moments especially a prolonged chase sequence involving the telekinesis movement of obstacles, overall proves somewhat disappointing mainly because it drags on a bit too long especially during its climactic showdown between Tia and mind-controlled Tony. While Escape was a fun adventure film, this film is planted firmly in B-movie film territory throughout with cheesy weird characters and unusual urban settings that seem more fitting within a horror film. Having Christopher Lee as a mad scientist villain only adds to this feeling as does Bette Davis and Anthony James' characters here. The gang of kids helping Tia definitely helps give this a cheesy B-movie feel too. Fun but it just drags on far too long to be as fun as its predecessor. *** out of ***** stars.

Sleeping With the Enemy (1991): Laura Burney (Julia Roberts) finds herself trapped in a nightmarish abusive relationship under the domination of her control freak husband Martin (Patrick Bergin). Desperate to gain her freedom, she plots her escape by faking her own death but can her plan succeed and even if it does, will even this throw him off her trail?

This is quite an effective little thriller. While largely predictable in terms of plot and execution, the performances here rise this a notch or two above similar ordinary run of the mill fare. Roberts is quite good and believable as the abused wife striving to finally gain her freedom and manages to illicit sympathy and support from the viewer. Bergin is also quite effective in his role as the psychopathic, domineering husband and soon comes across a true monster in many ways. This film IMO does deliver the goods in terms of thrills and deals with an issue all too real and true to life, that of spousal abuse and control. ***1/2 out of ***** stars.

[Couchtr26]

Inception - I don't while interesting visually never really pulled me into the story.  I can't explain. 

Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe - Not too bad actually, pretty watchable.  Jesse Ventura as a space police officer after former partner Sven Ole Thorsen.  Recently got the Sci Fi Invasion from Mill Creek much better selection then usual. 

[Jack]

The Hole (2001) - four college kids decide to do some partying in an abandoned military bunker. They end up getting locked in for a considerable period of time. The police investigate where the kids disappeared to, and over the course of the movie we learn the full extent of what went on in there, and why. This had an interesting plot twist which was by far the best thing about it. The characters were good, though they could have been developed a lot more. It dragged a bit in spots, but not too badly.  4/5

[FatFreddysCat]

"The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor" (2008)
http://www.youtube.com/v/ol-U0ibnVD4

The adventurous O'Connell clan (Brendan Fraser and Maria Bello) is back and battling more mummies, this time in post-WWII China, where their now grown-up son has inadvertently unleashed the spirit of a particularly nasty ancient Emperor.

This is a dumb but fun action/adventure just like the first two, owing much to the Indiana Jones franchise. It started getting reaaaalllly stupid by around the halfway mark (Yetis?) but the special effects were great and it certainly wasn't boring.

I liked this better than the 2nd "Mummy" mainly because they cast the O'Connell's son as an adult, therefore he was far less annoying than in "Mummy Returns," where he was an irritating little snot. Haha.

[Rev. Powell]

MY JOY (2010): A melange of scenes, drifting back and forth between post-WWII and the present day(often without warning), featuring crooked cops, child prostitutes and thieves. The stories all document corruption in Russia and Ukraine and argues that it's deep-seeded in the national character; unfortunately, more of the stories wind up as inconclusive misfires, and the fatalistic sameness of each episode quickly grows dull and wearying. 2/5.

[claws]

Body Shop (a.k.a. Deadly Memories) (2002)

The owner of a body shop is run off a road on his way to church with the wifey and daughter. The wife dies and the daughter falls into a deep coma. Two years later a killer wearing a helmet is killing those responsible for the accident, along with a few annoying customers at the shop.

Strangely entertaining cheapo production that mixes elements of slasher, torture porn, drama and religion (not a hidden propaganda movie) with Dukes of Hazzard type of action. Lots of butt-ugly actors, nudity, sex, violence, visions, flashbacks, shower scene, c&w music, rural setting and yeah, more nudity. My favorite scene shows some slut jumping on a trampoline exposing her goods for gratuitous reasons.

This film feels like it was made 20 years late. It reeks of Nail Gun Massacre kind of VHS fun. 3.5/5 Cheese

[JaseSF]

Dying Young (1991): Victor Geddes (Campbell Scott), a young man dying of leukemia, hires pretty young redhead Hiliary O'Neil (Julia Roberts) as his nurse and aid, an unlikely choice as she hardly seems qualified or ready for what's in store for her but Victor is in reality searching more for a companion to help him escape the horror and misery of his life filled with chemotherapy, hospital appointments and constant sickness.

This romance film has its moments and the characters are likable and believable as is what they go through here but honestly there was little here I personally found to be all that memorable and I suspect I won't recall much of anything about this one in a few days time. It's just not really the type of film that usually interests me so I may be a bit biased here. My girlfriend though really enjoyed it and I have to admit it's competently made but I also found it overlong, predictable and largely dull. **1/2 out of ***** stars.

Unidentified (2006): Reporters for a news magazine investigate reports of UFOs and alien abductions, each from opposing point of views - those in support of it as a real phenemenon and those who think it's all a huge hoax. Eventually the true purpose of this preachy pro-Christian movie rears its ugly head.

Actually the idea that aliens and UFOs may actually be linked to demonic activity was an interesting take (and one actually not completely implausible) that I think had some real potential. It's too bad it's never the real focus here. Said focus is actually repeatedly preaching that anyone non-Christian (not saved) is going to Hell. This stretches to people of other faiths and atheists as well. This element makes this film unbearably preachy and judgmental. Also disappointing is we never actually ever get to see any UFOs or aliens not to mention that the acting is pure amateur hour. Painfully bad. * out of ***** stars.

[alandhopewell]

     I'm not really sure what to make of this....



    It opens with a familiar sequence, young couple stranded out in the woods at night due to car trouble.The guy (of course) gets out to look for help, and runs into a dead body, only it's not dead....it's a zombie, and it bites him. He starts getting sick, without heartbeat or pulse, and he and his girlfriend hide out in this house out in the forest.

    Eventually, he bites her, and she changes. Most of the movie consists of the two of them in this house, talking about who (what) they are now, and bickering about issues germane to them, 4-X, he goes out to hunt food (people) but she refuses to hunt or eat.

    As a horror film, it's really slow. As a love story, it's really strange. I'm not sure if this is a bad movie, or just an odd one.

    This is in the BLOOD BATH package.

[Vik]

Waking Life
Probably one of the most fascinating movies I've ever seen.

[Jack]

Creepozoids (1987) - repeat viewing. In a post-apocalyptic future, a small group of military deserters takes shelter in an abandoned building. Of course the first order of business is for Linnea Quigley to take a shower  But then they discover a creature lurking about - and by lurking I mean it's a guy in big rubber suit who's almost unable to move - but they still manage to find a way to get killed by it. We've also got large stuffed rats, completely inanimate, that the actors hold up to themselves Hobgoblins-style to add even more horror and dread to the proceedings. I remembered this as being a bit better than it actually is, maybe it just doesn't hold up to repeated viewings too well. It's a bit dull overall.  3/5.

The Graves (2009) - repeat viewing. Two girls on a cross-country trip decide to take a tour of an old ghost town. Turns out there's some quasi-religious crazies inhabiting the place and they're killing people for...some reason. Never really figured out why. But they run around and look cute for 90 minutes, so there's that. They act terrified one minute and like smart-alecks the next. ? Some funny stuff like the main girl trying to climb a steep hill but sliding back down, obviously intentionally. Oh and there's some gas floating around that makes people murderously aggressive. Seeing the girls tied to a chair and trying to bite each other...oh jeez.  But a good time was had by all. 4/5.

Creatures From The Abyss (aka Plankton) (1994) - repeat viewing. A group of kids get stranded in a raft, but luckily happen across a large yacht floating in the sea. A large abandoned yacht with a genetic engineering lab. Oh yeah, this is probably not going to end well. This whole thing has a sort of Troll 2 level of ridiculousness about it. It's Italian and features the usual terrible, terrible dubbing which only makes it into even more of a comedy. Anyhow you get two babes in (and out of) bikini's and some utterly comical stop motion monster animation, and...oh jeez. Pure motherlode of cheese    5/5.

[FatFreddysCat]

"Hanna" (2011)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dj6zCJyTq2I

Artsy action thriller in which a teenage girl, raised in woodsy isolation and trained to be an assassin, learns of her origins when her "father's" employers come calling...to erase them both.

Some decent performances (Cate Blanchett is great as the bad guy), some neat mayhem but "Hanna" dragged on a bit too long and seems to be operating under the illusion that it's an "important" film of some kind. Not recommended. 

[lester1/2jr]

Mandingo - I saw this in a black studies class with mostly black  people back in the 90's along with an episode of some minstrel sit com that was hugely popular. I hadn't seen it since then and it wasn't as awesome as I remembered, mostly because the print was sort of dark or maybe the lighting was shabby. It was still good in a ridiculous one dimensional way. They call babies "suckers" and everyones talking about suckers throughout the movie it really started to be disconcerting. " she had 12 suck-uhs" . It's sordid and awful as you'd expect but the lighting really did hurt it 3.75/5  2 hours long