25 things a man should be able to do

[Joe the Destroyer]

Good stuff,Joe! 

  Once you get married...be prepared!

  1.Know which alchol you can drink with the least 'reek' factor...(mix vodka in coffee....)
   2.Learn to nod your head and respond to conversation when the wify is nagging...all the time blocking out everything she is saying while watching TV out the corner of your eye.
   3.Find a good hiding spot for your Hustler mags.
    4. Fake enjoying the chick fliks she'll insist you watch with her.
    5. Stay out of her way...and pick your words carefully when it's "that time of the month".
    6. Eat her "first time" recipes...and pretend " it's good! REALLY!''.
    7. Change a diaper in the wee hours of the morning.
    8. Walk through stores for hours without b***hing about it.
    9.Be broke all the time.
    10. Eyeball hot chicks without being obvious.
    11. Treat her cats nice...even when you want to drop kick the little basterd for puking on your favorite chair.
    12. Convince her that the crappy,low budget horror flik you want to watch  is " a classic! ReallY!"
     13. Love her  regardless of all else.

 

Ah, yes indeed!  I've gotten lucky enough that a few of my past girlfriends didn't need convincing for #12.  Although there was one... but we don't speak of her anymore, no no no...

[LilCerberus]

Does anybody else ever get freaked out when they walk through a door clearly marked "MEN", only to find that there aren't any urinals, & then start wondering whether or not they may have misread the sign on the door?

Or have you ever gone to use the restroom at a Wendy's, looked at the picture on the door, & thought to yourself, "Thank God I can read"?

[Joe the Destroyer]

In lieu of that, I'd like to open a restaurant with utterly ambiguous words on the restrooms.

Schlekagacks and Opeloodles

You can figure out for yourself which is which.

[Susan]

Does anybody else ever get freaked out when they walk through a door clearly marked "MEN", only to find that there aren't any urinals, & then start wondering whether or not they may have misread the sign on the door?

Or have you ever gone to use the restroom at a Wendy's, looked at the picture on the door, & thought to yourself, "Thank God I can read"?

I once went to a truckstop in oklahoma (on the border where all the porn video stores are) and there were condom machines in the ladies room.

Btw why is that such a big deal? You don't have a urinal at home

[Andrew]

Btw why is that such a big deal? You don't have a urinal at home

Actually, when we buy another house and I redo one of the bathrooms, I intend to install a stainless steel trough with a backsplash that runs the entire length of one wall.

[Susan]

Btw why is that such a big deal? You don't have a urinal at home

Actually, when we buy another house and I redo one of the bathrooms, I intend to install a stainless steel trough with a backsplash that runs the entire length of one wall.

and i guarantee the wife will leave all cleaning duties to you. 

[Mr_Vindictive]

Btw why is that such a big deal? You don't have a urinal at home

Actually, when we buy another house and I redo one of the bathrooms, I intend to install a stainless steel trough with a backsplash that runs the entire length of one wall.

But, will it be filled with Ice?

[Ash]

If I come over, can I p**s in it too?  
Oh please please please, can I?

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Actually, I have to admit that the original list posted here is complete crap.

Fix a dead outlet.
Bleed brakes.

Mix concrete!!!???

Who the hell made up this list?

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[Andrew]

If I come over, can I p**s in it too?   

That was the intent behind a large trough in the bathroom.  On movie night, when everyone needs to drain the lizard, we can stop the movie, everybody goes at once, and get back to watching "The Monster that Challenged the World."

[Susan]

so you'll all be sharing the same urinal in your private bathroom at home? hmm

Why even have a urinal? If you've got a bucket you won't even have to leave the sofa

[Andrew]

so you'll all be sharing the same urinal in your private bathroom at home? hmm

Why even have a urinal? If you've got a bucket you won't even have to leave the sofa

You ever seen four or five guys try to go in the same bucket at the same time?  It ain't pretty.

[RCMerchant]

 Back in about 1980, when I got my first apartment, I used to chew tobbaco. Not that puny Skoal stuff...crap like Redman and Beechnut...or even plug like Brown Mule or Spark Plug. I had bought an old copper spitoon from the flea market. My freinds (who also chewed...I guess it was a 'cool' thing to do at the time-this is Michigan,after all) would watch Tv and drink and I would sit the spitoon in the middle of the room. Yes...I had carpet. Needless to say...my landlord asn't too happy with me when it came time to boot my ass out... 

[Ash]

so you'll all be sharing the same urinal in your private bathroom at home? hmm

Why even have a urinal? If you've got a bucket you won't even have to leave the sofa

Or, you could always use an empty 2 liter bottle.

[Snivelly]

so you'll all be sharing the same urinal in your private bathroom at home? hmm

Why even have a urinal? If you've got a bucket you won't even have to leave the sofa

I'm guessing you've cleaned up after men at least a few times in your life, and I'm wondering why on earth you think that men who can't hit the toilet with it's large bright white opening could hit a f*&^$ing bucket?

Seriously, that should have been on the original list, being able to actually hit the toilet with your stream.  If you're that dinky, sit down and p**s, will ya?

[Ash]

Well sometimes Snivelly, the stream just goes astray.

We can't help it.