b***h SLAP (2009)

[Rev. Powell]

Three chesty babes fight punk interlopers and each other while searching for a treasure in the desert.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mM7ORw5m78

It's pretty much exactly what the trailer leads you to believe it is. (In fact, the trailer pretty much gives away the plot at the 30 second mark  ).

I enjoyed this a good bit, but I put it in the "bad movies" section because of the subject matter and because it's getting low marks on the IMDB.  It's obviously a tribute to FASTER p***yCAT KILL KILL, and it also rips off the twist from a popular 90s thriller (you'll see it coming).  Surprisingly there is almost no nudity, but ample cleavage in every scenes and lots of guns and explosions and nasty catfights.  It has a nice, fun, ridiculous spirit.  Some of the scenes are pretty fantastic; there's an Asian lolita with a killer yo-yo, tons of flashbacks, and blue-screen scenes that make almost no attempt to look at all realistic.  It's made by the producers of the old Hercules and Xena TV shows: Kevin Sorbo shows up as a secret agent, and Lucy Lawless and Rene O'Connor appear together (as nuns!) 

I also liked the 90 minute "making of" documentary, which really went into depth about the process of making a b-movie. 

The only real negatives are the "twist" ending and the fact that it goes on about 20 minutes longer than it should.

It's not a life-changing movie, but I don't think you'll be disappointed with a rental. 3.5/5, maybe even 4/5 depending on your mood and tolerance for silicone. 

[Psycho Circus]

Ahh, the magic of the wonder-bra. They're chest are no where near big enough to hold my interest in this type of crap. Plus, I know it's a Faster p***ycat rip, but I'm sure there was another film put out within the last 2-3 years that was extremely similar to this.

[Rev. Powell]

Circus, believe it or not I thought of you during this movie because of the heavy metal soundtrack, much of which sounded like 1980s stuff to my untrained ears.  The rest of the movie did have too much of a 1990s feel for you, though.

[Trevor]

It would be great to have b***h Slap and Kick Ass on a double bill. 

[Jack]

That's some of the finest camera work I've ever seen!!!

[Psycho Circus]

Circus, believe it or not I thought of you during this movie because of the heavy metal soundtrack, much of which sounded like 1980s stuff to my untrained ears.  The rest of the movie did have too much of a 1990s feel for you, though.

The soundtrack has Stank E. Digitz, KU, AM Conspiracy and Rebel Vengeance performing on it.

I've never heard of any of these artists ever.   Nice that you had me on the brain tho' Rev.  

This is one of those films where it's made basically because: "Oh, we can sucker loads of guys into paying for a ticket to see some cleavage". It may pander to what people (men) want but there's not much else on offer. It's too blatant for me. Give me a crazy story, monsters, blood, action and THEN boobs....

[Vik]

Yay for boobs..
But I'm more interested in the Making of you talk about Rev. 

[Vik]

That's some of the finest camera work I've ever seen!!!

Are you being sarcastic ?

[Doggett]

I'm sold on it !!!

If the Rev said it was good, then I'm checking it out !!!!

Well...

The Rev and the boobage in the trailer...

[Chainsawmidget]

It's obviously a tribute to FASTER p***yCAT KILL KILL, and it also rips off the twist from a popular 90s thriller (you'll see it coming). 

Sounds interesting. 

Surprisingly there is almost no nudity,

Lost interest already.

but ample cleavage in every scenes and lots of guns and explosions and nasty catfights.  It has a nice, fun, ridiculous spirit.  Some of the scenes are pretty fantastic; there's an Asian lolita with a killer yo-yo, tons of flashbacks, and blue-screen scenes that make almost no attempt to look at all realistic.  It's made by the producers of the old Hercules and Xena TV shows: Kevin Sorbo shows up as a secret agent, and Lucy Lawless and Rene O'Connor appear together (as nuns!)

Okay.  Now it's a maybe. 

[WingedSerpent]

It looks like it has a great plot.  That's what I like about it.

[joejoeherron]

Well,my mind's made up, I have to  see this one. Of course, anything with guns, cleavage, and action gets my attention.

[BTM]

You know, I think they had only ONE real set in this entire film. 

Seriously.

Anyway, I'd give it an OK.  Like Rev said, goes on a bit too long and the twist was kind of lame.

Mild spoiler, of the three main chicks, none of them get naked.  (WTF?!?) 

Although you do get some lesbian make out sessions.

[Torgo]

Is there a ton of female nudity in this movie is it just more of tease?

[Rev. Powell]

Is there a ton of female nudity in this movie is it just more of tease?

There is almost no nudity.  It is a feminist movie, after all.