Good working conditions

[The Burgomaster]

Just had a long lunch with the owners of my company . . . Mexican food and Margaritas . . . now I'm drinking Sambuca in my office.

[Flick James]

Are you hiring?

[Leah]

but where's all the queso?!

[lester1/2jr]

here are my conditions: sort out boxes in a dusty parking lot from 9 to 10. Deliver 90-100 packages till 4. recession baby!

[akiratubo]

Here are my working conditions:  apply for job, don't hear back.  Alternately: apply for job, called in for interview, THEN, don't hear back.

[ghouck]

Here's my work day:

1. Don't get buttraped.
2. Count the prisoners.
3. Feed the prisoners.
4. Don't get buttraped.
5. OC any prisoners that are fighting.
6. Look through their stuff for stuff they're not allowed to have.
7. Don't get buttraped.
8. Count the prisoners again.
9. Don't get buttraped.
10. Move prisoners around to the places they have to go.
11. Don't get buttraped.
12. Search common areas for contraband.
13. Don't get buttraped, or shanked.
14. Bring in visitors.
15. Take out visitors.
16. Don't get shanked or buttraped.
17. Count the prisoners.
18. Go home with butt un-raped.

[claws]

Used to be working conditions at my last job:

1. Did not make your quota? The boss would either

a) Scream at you at the top of his lungs in his office for at least five minutes (he loved to scream, he never got hoarse).
b) Punish you by making you work in the worst section (cold store) for the rest of the day. Meaning, all your co-workers in other sections would go home hours before you. Cold store workers regularly had to work overtime because they had the most orders.
c) To match your quota he would subtract your working hours.
d) He would give you the runaround all day by sending you from one section to the other, criticizing your work, calling you into his office only to holler at you, or point out mistakes you did weeks ago (which would result in more yelling/punishment/working hours deducted), offering you to sign a notice to quit ever so often.
e) He would give you a verbal or written warning (three written warnings and you are out).

2. Overtime (up to 2-4 hours during busy season and 1-3 hours any other day).

3. Working every third Saturday.

4. Working overtime on holidays (never had stress-free Christmas holidays in all those years I worked there).

5. Denying you to leave 'on time'. If you managed to sneak out without getting caught you would be punished the next working day (see a, b, c, d, e).

They always came up with new ideas to make work unpleasant as possible. And as the boss used to tell us once or twice a month, "If you don't like the way we run things here, quit".