The Inane diologue award.

[Flangepart]

Or as I call it, the "No S%!& Sherlock' award.

Given to a song or line in a film that so comments on the obvious, ya wanna smack it for doing ya that way.

Suspect #1- PLAN 9 > "Well, Inspector Clay is dead, Murdered, and someone's responsible!"

Suspect#2- Title song, KINGDON OF THE SPIDERS > Lyric "Or will it bring the unknown, that we've never seen before."

So...any examples ya wanna put on the list?

[indianasmith]

A line my friend Lee and I put in as the teaser of a phony "Golden Age of Radio" Broadcast we did, for a show called BEYOND SCIENCE:  "Beyond the realm of things we know lies the realm of things we don't know!"

[Jack]

Good ol' Plan 9 classic:  "And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future."

[Flangepart]

Good ol' Plan 9 classic:  "And remember my friend, future events such as these will affect you in the future."

D'OH! How did I forget that? Gitten' old...

[BakuryuuTyranno]

Not a film, but revival series Power Rangers Samurai featured the main villain threatening the Red Ranger with "its payback time Red Ranger - and you're the one who's going to pay!" - the "payback" being on the Ranger's bloodline, meaning the Ranger will die - at the hands of himself, which the villain will achieve by fighting him... what?!?!

[ChaosTheory]

From the first XMEN:
"You know what happens to a toad when it gets struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else."






From the otherwise great LA CONFIDENTIAL:
"Some guys get the world. Some guys get an ex-hooker and a ride to Arizona."
- to be fair, I'm pretty sure that line is in the novel too, but it's still pretty terrible. Basinger's barely-awake delivery doesn't help either.

[Ticonderoga 64]

From the original NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD: "They're dead, they're all messed up.."

[BoyScoutKevin]

From the British TV series "Broadchurch," which I probably have already mentioned, and not an exact quote, but the gist of it, where the lead female police detective is talking to her new male partner, about the father of a boy who went missing and was later found dead:

"Let's not investigate him. I know he's innocent."

WTF?! I am not trained in police tactics, but when I heard that inane remark, I sincerely wanted to put my head through the computer screen on which I was watching the show. As even I know, and every good mystery writer will tell you, the people you first investigate in a murder in the family, is the other family members, because they are the ones most likely to have commited the murder.

But what is one more inane moment in that show, when there were so many.

[zombie no.one]

GUY: "The phone lines have been cut!"

GIRL A: "What does that mean?!"

GIRL B: "It means someone's cut the phone lines!"


from Steel Trap which is not in a any way a comedy, and that little dialogue exchange is not done in an 'ironic' way.

[Josso]

25% of helix

[Olivia Bauer]

"Terraforming? What's that?"

-Some random idiot in Man of Steel

[akiratubo]

"What's magma?"

Tommy Lee Jones' character in Volcano who, as an expert on natural disaster response, really should have heard that term at least once in his life.

[JayJayM12]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyophYBP_w4

EDIT:  Not sure why it's not showing up as a youtube clip...

[Rev. Powell]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyophYBP_w4

EDIT:  Not sure why it's not showing up as a youtube clip...

Take out the "s" in "https". (You don't have to use any tags anymore).

A Scene From Troll 2

[zombie no.one]

(from The Mutilator)

GUY 1: Well, anybody got any good ideas for break?

GIRL: I'm gonna set a new high score on the video machine

GUY 2: And I'm gonna watch.


If the complete inanity of this doesn't come across well in print, skip to 5:40 on the vid...

The Mutilator (1985)