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I kicked my son out.

Started by RCMerchant, December 06, 2014, 12:04:50 PM

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RCMerchant

My son Eddie has been living in my apartment.I dont live there-he does. I have been living at Tiana's-He wont try and find a job-he smokes lots of pot and plays video games.When I try to go there the house is loaded with pot heads.I had the landlord warn me. I kicked him out. I just cant do it no more.
Am I a bad father?
If he dont get a boot in the ass of the REAL world...I dunno...I feel awful.
Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)
Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."
Slobber, Drool, Drip!
https://www.tumblr.com/ronmerchant

Rev. Powell

You're not a bad father. If you let him continue screwing up and covered for his ass, then you'd be being a bad father. Just let him know that you love him and that you'll be there for him---when he does the right things.
I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...

RCMerchant

He said-"your not my family anymore I dont want to see you ever."
I feel really bad. I wanna cry.
Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)
Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."
Slobber, Drool, Drip!
https://www.tumblr.com/ronmerchant

retrorussell

Sometimes when you've done all you can they need to just grow up on their own.  Let it go, be happy and live your own life.
"O the legend they say, on a Valentine's Day, is a curse that'll live on and on.."

Rev. Powell

Quote from: RCMerchant on December 06, 2014, 12:31:27 PM
He said-"your not my family anymore I dont want to see you ever."
I feel really bad. I wanna cry.

That sucks, but he's clearly immature. Not your fault, as long as you're doing what you think is right. Sucks to have your kid mad at you but you have to do what's best for him even if he doesn't like it. Sounds like he needs a good kick in the ass, I did too at that age.
I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...

Allhallowsday

So, the apartment is leased in your name, but who pays the rent? 
If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!

Josso

Quote from: Rev. Powell on December 06, 2014, 12:18:25 PM
You're not a bad father. If you let him continue screwing up and covered for his ass, then you'd be being a bad father. Just let him know that you love him and that you'll be there for him---when he does the right things.

Unless he gets worse through being kicked out, I guess it's a really tricky call. What do you do before that, intervention or something I guess. I live with my parents, I'm 23, smoke weed basically as self medication (I guess amounts here were not stated, so there's that... if you are on like 5g high grade a day there's no way you'll be motivated to do anything). Not being funny but if I had to live with RC on a family basis I'd probably have killed someone by now. My buddy has become full agoraphobic, does nothing but games & smoke, he used to smoke but less and produce near professional level music. BUT let's look at this from the other side, some people make careers out of video games.. I see twitch streams with crazily regular donations and subscriptions coming in when you do the maths it's a proper job nowadays, then there's people who make successful gaming channels work, it's still difficult but not outside the realms of possibility in 2014. So I guess this is all relative and "more information required" seems like a nice conclusion, but yeah that's just my 2 cents from someone over half the age of most people here. I feel like I'm not sure what the main issue was here, the pot smoking, the doing nothing or both... and I feel lie I'd have to investigate the reasons of why that is before really passing on any advice.

VenomX73

Quote from: retrorussell on December 06, 2014, 12:57:21 PM
Sometimes when you've done all you can they need to just grow up on their own.

I agree
Gilligan's island, Goonies and Godzilla information booth here!

RCMerchant

Quote from: Allhallowsday on December 06, 2014, 02:12:22 PM
So, the apartment is leased in your name, but who pays the rent? 
I pay the f**king rent-513 god dam dollars a month
Supernatural?...perhaps. Baloney?...Perhaps not!" Bela Lugosi-the BLACK CAT (1934)
Interviewer-"Does Dracula ever end for you?
Lugosi-"No. Dracula-never ends."
Slobber, Drool, Drip!
https://www.tumblr.com/ronmerchant

Allhallowsday

Quote from: RCMerchant on December 06, 2014, 03:13:49 PM
Quote from: Allhallowsday on December 06, 2014, 02:12:22 PM
So, the apartment is leased in your name, but who pays the rent? 
I pay the f**king rent-513 god dam dollars a month
That's what I expected.  Why don't you give up your apartment and start helping Tiana pay her rent since you live there?  Perhaps you could get another apartment with both of you paying for one place. 
Since you're paying the rent, you did the right thing.  Tough, of course.  If your son is not willing to understand, he will hopefully grow up eventually. 
If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!

zombie no.one

Quote from: RCMerchant on December 06, 2014, 12:31:27 PM
He said-"your not my family anymore I dont want to see you ever."
I feel really bad. I wanna cry.
not to make assumptions, but I reckon there's a good chance he probably means the exact opposite

like you probably know when you smoke a lot of weed you lose perspective. I can automatically tell when my brother (who is an on-off weed smoker) is back 'on' it. he basically stops giving a s**t about anyone except himself. weed is not a life-or-death addiction drug, but it's a very selfish drug.  someone who is smoking it 24/7 probably needs that wakeup call, and I hope your son sorts himself out. there's only so much you should be expected to tolerate IMO



lester1/2jr

pot and video games are a deadly combination in terms of proactive behaviors. better to be a crack head and UFO cultist or something. actually, no it's not

Allhallowsday

Quote from: Josso on December 06, 2014, 02:55:01 PM
...
Unless he gets worse through being kicked out, I guess it's a really tricky call. What do you do before that, intervention or something I guess. I live with my parents, I'm 23, smoke weed basically as self medication (I guess amounts here were not stated, so there's that... if you are on like 5g high grade a day there's no way you'll be motivated to do anything). Not being funny but if I had to live with RC on a family basis I'd probably have killed someone by now. My buddy has become full agoraphobic, does nothing but games & smoke, he used to smoke but less and produce near professional level music. BUT let's look at this from the other side, some people make careers out of video games.. I see twitch streams with crazily regular donations and subscriptions coming in when you do the maths it's a proper job nowadays, then there's people who make successful gaming channels work, it's still difficult but not outside the realms of possibility in 2014. So I guess this is all relative and "more information required" seems like a nice conclusion, but yeah that's just my 2 cents from someone over half the age of most people here. I feel like I'm not sure what the main issue was here, the pot smoking, the doing nothing or both... and I feel lie I'd have to investigate the reasons of why that is before really passing on any advice.

You, my friend, are hardly "...over half the age of most people here...".   :smile:
If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!

Rev. Powell

Quote from: Josso on December 06, 2014, 02:55:01 PM
Quote from: Rev. Powell on December 06, 2014, 12:18:25 PM
You're not a bad father. If you let him continue screwing up and covered for his ass, then you'd be being a bad father. Just let him know that you love him and that you'll be there for him---when he does the right things.

Unless he gets worse through being kicked out, I guess it's a really tricky call. What do you do before that, intervention or something I guess. I live with my parents, I'm 23, smoke weed basically as self medication (I guess amounts here were not stated, so there's that... if you are on like 5g high grade a day there's no way you'll be motivated to do anything). Not being funny but if I had to live with RC on a family basis I'd probably have killed someone by now. My buddy has become full agoraphobic, does nothing but games & smoke, he used to smoke but less and produce near professional level music. BUT let's look at this from the other side, some people make careers out of video games.. I see twitch streams with crazily regular donations and subscriptions coming in when you do the maths it's a proper job nowadays, then there's people who make successful gaming channels work, it's still difficult but not outside the realms of possibility in 2014. So I guess this is all relative and "more information required" seems like a nice conclusion, but yeah that's just my 2 cents from someone over half the age of most people here. I feel like I'm not sure what the main issue was here, the pot smoking, the doing nothing or both... and I feel lie I'd have to investigate the reasons of why that is before really passing on any advice.

RC said "I had the landlord warn me," so it's not innocent behavior. If you're able to make a living playing video games and smoking pot without bothering anyone else, then no one cares. But why should RC pay for his son to be a nuisance to others? 
I'll take you places the hand of man has not yet set foot...

HappyGilmore

Quote from: Rev. Powell on December 06, 2014, 12:18:25 PM
You're not a bad father. If you let him continue screwing up and covered for his ass, then you'd be being a bad father. Just let him know that you love him and that you'll be there for him---when he does the right things.
I second this.  This is essentially what I was going to post.  So..

But yeah, you're not a bad father.  Did the right thing here. 
"The path to Heaven runs through miles of clouded Hell."

Don't get too close, it's dark inside.
It's where my demons hide, it's where my demons hide.