Things your Dad usta say.

[Trevor]

My Dad was a funny person - good sense of humor - and I asked him why, seeing as he was raised in the Jewish faith (and had me circumcised  ) we were long time Presbyterians.  His answer was "Son: I didn't want a religious order telling me what I could and couldn't do with my weekends. I'm in church every Sunday and if the church needs me any other day, they know where to find me." 

[ER]

"When I was little I thought the munchkins on The Wizard of Oz were monsters and their name was 'munch skins'."

[ER]

"Once upon a time there was a monster who looked exactly like a little girl's daddy, and he tucked her in and told her a bedtime story, hoping the story would make the little girl go to sleep fast, because what the monster who looked like Daddy wanted was to creep back into the little girl's room at midnight, while she was sleeping, and eat her beating heart. There's your story, Ellie, now go to sleep fast."

[chefzombie]

" i REALLY hate your hair, but no way am i letting you get suspended for the fact that it's purple when there are so many bleached blondes at your school", and he DID get me off the hook on that.