Without looking them up, name the 9 countries with the most English speakers

[ER]

US is technically the only ones that's correct. We'll give you "England," though (actually UK, which is a country according to the UN!).

weird... so I am from the UK - a country comprised of 4 countries, 2 of which I have never been to 

One thing that used to get me a whiplash-fast stare as a kid visiting my mom's people in Ireland was to slip up and say, "The British isles." It would get a patient explanation from my grandfather that people who said that traditionally did not mean the little islands around Britain, but Ireland included, something the Irish always took a grim view on. Oddly Scots also tend dislike being called British. And don't even begin to go there with the Welsh. I think we live in an age of disunity and localized sentiments.

And, oh, yeah, this may be a wild stab in the dark, but I once heard English is mandatory for all students in Jakarta, so, is Indonesia one of the nine countries? Big population, that I much I know.

[Rev. Powell]

The UK is weird, for sure. Usually here in the US, when we say England, Britain, or the UK, we mean the same thing. (Yes, I know they're all technically different.)