Worst film of all time

[Will]

I love that movie.  Far superior to the first two.

[FLANGEPART]

Andrew,Josh,...thank you. Did you ever realise how,well, Unamerican your suposed to feel for not likeinf musicals? Its like something Tailgunner Joe or Tipper G. wolud do! Sheesh! I read the Indian movie reviews at the Stomper....be afraid,be verry afraid. Ya know, the "Mamushca" song in The Addams Family was okey, because it was set up as a planed thing by Gomez...Jake and Elwood at the Redneck bar, you expected them ti sing there! But...i'm sorry...Judy Garland is a sad, sad image in my mind. I just can't get my braincells behind it.

[Stupid Jacob]

What the hell? A Rocky Horror sequel? What happens this time? Brad and Janet get have sex with a man in drag, again?

[Abby]

Oh no ... it's much much worse. They're in marriage therapy ... which is being broadcasted LIVE via a TV variety show. Brad and Janet are played by different actors ... all of the original RHPS goons are back except Curry.

It turns out that Brad's evil twin brother is set on breaking up their marriage on national TV. Janet become a TV star. Brad gets locked away as a mental patient. Then at the end, Janet sort of realizes that fame is no substitute for love ... Brad reveals his twin brother's evil plot. The TV audience doesn't care ... all they want is entertainment. Everyone lives happily ever after.

And you know what? The above summary is very coherant considering the nature of this movie. Which shows you that I actually TRIED to watch it.

I first saw this on cable in the 80's, but I couldn't pay attention to it. Always thought it was me. But it's not. I bought my VHS copy maybe a year ago ... and it was a trial of endurance sitting through it without fast-forwarding.

It BARELY resembles the first Rocky Horror Picture Show.

[Stupid Jacob]

Good god. Thats just evil. But I just know I'll end up seeing it.

[Abby]

Seriously, you might as well plant yourself crosslegged in front of some burning-hot embers.

The musical numbers punch holes in your soul. The songs that aren't half-hearted knock-offs of original Rocky tunes have lyrics which don't relate to the "story" at all. I found myself groaning every time a new song would gear up.

I've sat through this in its entirety twice (not counting my early cable viewing). The first time I sat through it just to exploit my full 75 cents worth of "entertainment." The next time I sat through it was almost on a dare. I had told a friend how bad it was ... mentioning it in the same breath as a made-for TV musical crapfest called 33 1/3 Revolutions Per Monkee which I've cherished since childhood. Said that both would take years off your life. He did not heed my warnings, and insisted I show them to him back-to-back.

I haven't heard back from him since we viewed the movies.

Beware. Take Care. Beware.

[peter johnson]

I saw Shock Treatment on the big screen.  I sat next to a group who had brought props & stuff like black cloth to tear during the "Little Black Dress" song.  They tried really really hard to get some camp fun out of the thing, but it simply didn't work for them.  I left the theatre feeling a bit sad for them, kinda like witnessing a child's birthday party no-one came to.
You are the only person I know who's even HEARD of 331/3 revolutions per Monkee, let alone seen it --
I must visit your must-be awesome site & I'm sorry I haven't yet.

[peter johnson]

Oh, Gord in heaffen -- I lived in India & parts of Asia for years.  Once when I was in Lahore, Pakistan, I tried to get work as a Western extra in Pakistani films.  
Andrew's assessment of Indian films is essentially true, but doesn't prepare you for the sheer surrealistic TORTURE of trying to get them to make sense.  The movies in India are a family event, with even urban audiences in places like Calcutta bringing their goats and livestock and small fires to cook chai/tea on right into the aisles.  Everyone screams and speaks at the screen and shouts advice to the characters.  Imagine a happy and involved professional wrestling audience.  I once saw a Bengali epic (4hrs. long!) hit called "Bandi!", or "Captured!", about a royal kidnapping.  Supposedly taking place in the 12th century days of the Moghul Empire, there were numerous scenes with, oh, electric lights plainly visible on the walls of the forts they used for location shots, jet planes flying overhead during cavalry charges, and -- easily my favorite -- a city bus going by in the background during a harrowing confrontation with the head evil bad guy.  Now, we're talking 70mm widescreen here, folks, not some video or wimp 35mm.
I can only say that as bad as Indian movies are, Pakistani films are even worse -- the music is all recycled disco or Madonna or imitations of whatever is the very bottom of the barrel Western pop music at the time, played out with ferocious speed and ultra-suggestive dancing.  You cannot show kissing or even hand holding in Indian/Pakistani cinema, so instead you have these dance numbers wherein graphic sex is told in symbolic fashion.  You think I jest?  Go on, I dare you -- go to your local curry outlet & ask the guy or gal at the counter if they have any videos for rent -- they will.  You have been warned.

[Abby]

A couple years ago, I was working in New York and commuting from Jersey. Some local cable station showed either Indian flicks every night.

I watched that station nonstop. All my friends thought I'd totally lost it. No subtitles. Tons of speaking/singing parts. I still don't know any of the titles to the movies I saw. But oh how I loved to see those committed yet rascally housewives sing and sing and sing. I actually began to recognize the actors after a while.

'You know, that guy with the ugly mustache."

Four out of five Indian musicals have scenes where a woman sings to/around/for a snake. I actually felt obligated to research it, and it turns out that there's some religious legend that housewives speak to snakes all day while their husbands work.


Hurray for 'Bollywood.'

By the by, on weekends, the same TV station aired a host of Korean features ... many of them with French dubbing. Surreal, to say the least.

[Abby]

And yes, you DO need to see my site.

http://www.williamgirdler.com target=newwindow>MY SITE

Heck, even Iran likes it!

I hear that 33 1/3 was re-released by Rhino a year or so ago, which could explain why The Monkees couldn't get their tours financed. I think 33 1/3 was the first bootleg I ever purchased when I was 12 ... that and SW Holiday Special. It's amazing I ever bought another bootleg again.

I'm surprised Rhino put out 33 1/3, though. It makes everybody involved look really stupid. Someone should put out a "Variety Show Hell" comp tape with the best of the worst scenes from 33 1/3, Brady Bunch Variety, Pink Lady, and SW Holiday. All four shows could be highly entertaining if presented in short bursts. Watching those programs in their entirety is like freebasing uranium.

[Dave]

I think that the worst films of all time is of course the 1930's 40's and 50's genre of filming with the people who can't act even though they have set the scene of the actors that we have today and im not putting that down, but what i am putting down is the boring content the crap storylines and completly no plot. Im not saying that i sit and watch all of the films during these generations im just giving my opinion

[Scott]

Dave is young. Probably a teenager.

[Faerie Of Death]

I'd have to add to my list Excess Baggage and just about every Shirley Temple movie in existence.  All through Excess Baggage, I kept waiting and waithing for something interesting to happen, but I was horribly horribly disappointed.  But, despite all it's flaws, it doesn't even approach the Shirley Temple movies in sheer evilness.  I admit, when I was a wee girl, I LOVED Shirley Temple, I watched Heidi religiously and never once giggled over the title "Wee Willie Winkie".  But, sadly, I lost my childish innocence.  One day, sometime during my hellish Junior High years, I was terribly bored and popped Heidi into the VCR.  About a half hour later, I was forced to shut it off and go bang my head against a wall.  I'd have to agree with Josh, happy, heartwarming musicals with adorable children and storybook endings contain something that makes me and just about everyone I know go all masochistic.  Perhaps it's the knowledge that, even at the time, all the sweetness and light was just an illusion, a way for people ot forget that they were homeless or starving or losing everything they had.  Or possibly we're screaming at them for their naivete.  Or perhaps it's jealousy; they're blissful and the rest of the world isn't, who knows?

[FLANGEPART]

Faerie...i think the last part may be the key thing you said. G rowing up sucks. Only knowing you have some good friends, and if lucky, parents that , for all their imperfections, love you , makes it livable. Jealousy sound like a lot of it. Its just human Nature. When your not going it all alone, it's doable. Just not always easy.Oh,well...enough pontificating!...bring on the Hang Glideing Musk Oxen!

[peter johnson]

Yikes!! I seen the site!! I seen the site!!  Really cool -- one could say, breath-taking in execution.
Really really well done & informative.  Poor Mr. Girdler.  But heck, he made 'em, didn't he, instead of just talking about 'em?
On a related note, I'm shooting a pilot episode of a fishing show for a local group that has rip-off elements of "Red Green" to it. Heck, maybe we can call it a "homage". . .