What's the Most Physically Painful Thing You've Endured

[indianasmith]

I watched SKYLINE in the theaters . . . 

[ghouck]

I watched SKYLINE in the theaters . . . 

So did I. There was not one character in that movie that I didn't enjoy seeing die. Usually I complain that a movie tries too hard to make you like the characters, in Skyline they didn't try at all. It was like "Here's a bunch of a***oles, hope you like them. . "

[Mofo Rising]

Once, I bought this cool metal cube. I was in my attic playing with it when a bunch of sharp hooks came out of nowhere and ripped me into pieces.

That happened to me, too!  Even worse, it itched like a mofo when I was resurrected and consumed other people whole to get my flesh back.

Really? I just got a bunch of nails driven into my skull. Had migraines ever since. But I got a cool leather outfit out of the deal.

Yeah, well they pretty much leave those cubes lying all over the place. An attractive nuisance, if you ask me. Used to be the Cenobite menace had a certain amount of class, but those days are over. Heck, the last one I tangled with had the "superpower" of attacking me with some nasty cigarette burns. No way to go through the afterlife.

[Mofo Rising]

Bring back this topic.

When I was kid it was de rigueur to ride on the back of somebody's bike. Well I was riding on the back of my brother's bike when for some reason or other I lost my footing. What happened was that I immediately fell back onto the back tire of my brother's bike. The moving tire, which I sat on and then proceeded to rip apart all my delicate seat bits. There's no way to play that off cool.

There's a lot of dental stories here, so I thought I should mention that the week I got my wisdom teeth pulled was the best week ever. When they pulled my wisdom teeth, I was a tiny slip of a boy, maybe a hundred pounds at a good time. The drugs they gave me were way too strong.

Here was my week. Wake up, eat some ramen, brush my teeth, take a pill. I basically slept for a week straight. Fantastic. If I could sleep for a living, I'd sign up no questions asked.

[Olivia Bauer]

...Mac and Me?

[FatFreddysCat]

All I can say is "ouch." Some awful stories here!

Both of my most painful experiences have been bicycle related. When I was about eight, I was riding my bike past the local shopping mall when I saw what looked like a dirt path that went off into the woods behind the mall. Curious, I decided to ride my bike down that path and see where it went. Unfortunately, the "path" ended at the top of a wall behind the mall's Dumpsters. I couldn't stop the bike in time and went flying off the top of the wall, fell about six feet, and landed on the side of my face. (I suppose I was lucky I didn't crash directly into one of the dumpsters, or I might not even be here today!) Like an idiot, I got back up and rode my bike back home through a haze of blood and pain (fortunately it was a short ride), and I remember my poor Dad was in the front yard doing yard work when I came screaming up the driveway, he took one look at me and nearly had a heart attack, my face and clothes were covered in blood and dirt and I must've looked like an outtake from a zombie movie. Long story short, it took several hours in the emergency room for the docs to clean all the dirt, grit and gravel out of my face and several stitches at the corner of my mouth to close where I'd ripped my lip.

Years later, I'd upgraded to a ten speed bike, and was riding it down a particularly steep hill on my way to go play some video games at a friend's house. I reach the bottom of the hill, try to slow down at the bottom... brakes don't work. In a panic, I look up - telephone pole. BLAM! Smack into it head on and  hit the ground. My brother, who was riding in front of me, kept right on going and had no idea anything had happened till he turned around to say something to me and I wasn't there! He turned around and found me in a heap on the ground bleeding from my knee and a gash on my head. That got me my first ride in an ambulance and six more stitches in my knee. I haven't been on a bicycle since then. 

Oh, and about two weeks ago I fell off the roof of my RV trailer while I was covering it up with a tarp for the winter. I attached the tarp to the front of the trailer, hopped up onto the roof from the rear, pulled it all the way to the back, and was going to jump back down to the ground by climbing off the roof onto the attached spare tire. Well, I missed the spare and went crashing all the way to the ground. I still have some bruising on my chest and my arms. The pain wasn't too bad, but the nagging from the wife which is still going on ('next time wait for me to bring you the ladder dammit, you could've broken your neck!' etc.) is unbearable.

[Alex]

Despite being stabbed, gassed and a few other things, the most painful thing I have had to go through was getting the muscles in the bottom of my foot twisted up and caught on each other. I could just see a big lump sticking out of the arch of my foot. The pain was enough that I was unable to do anything but be in my own private world of agony. In desperation I recall kicking my foot against the corner of a wooden box, hoping to force the lump back inside. Unsurprisingly this did not help. It felt like there was a drill inside my foot and it was boring its way outside. I couldn't even tell the other person in the room what was wrong. It really ruined the sex we had been having.

[Trevor]

Being bullied in high school: I fell, hit my head, got up, confronted the bully and I kicked him in the side of the head just as HE was getting to his feet from tackling me. I continued kicking him until he stopped moving, I got violent with people who were trying to restrain me and I almost attacked the shocked teacher. That would have gotten me expelled as I completely lost it.

I will never get that angry or be hurt like that ever again: I nearly killed someone. 

[Trevor]

90% of films starring Kate Hudson.

[Trevor]

All this talk of balls and bell-ends, reminds me that I once had my erection stamped on. That was pretty bad.

Sympathy pain.  I once had mine bent at an extreme angle.  It slipped out during some enthusiastic pumping, and the girl thrust backwards hard and bent it nearly double on itself.  She mistook the meaning of my scream and thrust back even harder.

Oy 

[RCMerchant]

I ate a steering wheel of a 1963 Chevy pickup.
Still have a large scar on my chin.
Didn't taste good either. Some how I kept my front teeth, but spit out some of my back teeth.
Broke both my legs, too. Worst part- It was my buddy Bud Mortimore's truck. He just bought it. I was going to town on a beer run when me, Bud, and Gary were fishing.

[ER]

1. Having Daisy. I smirked at the idea of childbirth being as bad as I'd heard and figured I'd show 'em how it was done, and while I did make it through naturally.....it hurt. A bunch. I was shocked how much it did. The next two times were never nearly as bad.

2. Nevermind.

3. Stubbed my toe walking in the dark one night, bit my tongue, fell sideways and smacked my funny bone, before coming to rest hitting my chin on a doorframe. I'd pay to see a video of that incident.

[Bob Freely]

Kidney stone.  I would not wish a kidney stone on my most hated enemy, I honestly thought I was going to die, the pain was so bad. 

[Rev. Powell]

Kidney stone.  I would not wish a kidney stone on my most hated enemy, I honestly thought I was going to die, the pain was so bad. 

I have an irrational fear of getting a kidney stone. Heard too many horror stories.

[Trevor]

Kidney stone.  I would not wish a kidney stone on my most hated enemy, I honestly thought I was going to die, the pain was so bad. 

I have an irrational fear of getting a kidney stone. Heard too many horror stories.

I had severe kidney stones in 1996: very, very painful and I had meds which zonked me out for hours.

My folks were still near me at the time (driving distance) and my Dad told me to request leave for a week and come stay with them which I did. I felt better after two days of home cooked meals but they insisted that I stay the whole time which I did. I remember watching Unforgiven with Dad on TV then.