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June 17, 2018, 09:31:06 PM
598828 Posts in 46187 Topics by 6135 Members
Latest Member: MichaelMom Forum  |  Movies  |  Bad Movies  |  Absence (2013) « previous next »
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Author Topic: Absence (2013)  (Read 811 times)
Cinematic Monster Fanatic from Weird New Jersey
Bad Movie Lover

Karma: 92
Posts: 863

One monster with extra cheese, hold the plot.

« on: September 11, 2013, 06:00:00 PM »

The title of Absence couldn't be more fitting: It quickly abandons its plot point and for 90% of the film nothing happens. I started the movie with the expectation of watching a movie about alien fetal abduction and experimentation. What I had in fact rented was a found-footage movie about a young couple and Annoying Film Student Brother staying at their aunt's cabin in the mountains to get away from the local media attention after the wife's 7-months-along baby suddenly up and disappears to parts unknown.

You watch them make breakfast, eat doughnuts, go grocery shopping, play team games, go swimming, drink beer, use the hot tub, make out, drive places, and hold the camera by their feet. Yeah. I was looking for more of an alien aspect here. The aliens, when you do see them, are a pulsing blue light in the sky that makes electronics flip out or shadows.

These aliens are also complete a-holes because they appear to just do things for the hell of it. Weird moving thingamajig under somebody's skin! Why is it there? Who knows! Does it ever reappear in context to the plot? No! Is it ever resolved? No!

Tap on the glass door and run away! Why? Who knows! Does it advance the plot in any way? No! Why tap on doors when they could just appear inside the house? Because!

There are exactly two scares in the movies and both of them are jumps, only one of which is even effective. I have just run out of things to say on this movie, there's really nothing else I can talk about. I'm glad it was a streaming rental and not a steaming purchase. Thumbdown
« Last Edit: September 23, 2013, 04:31:52 AM by SynapticBoomstick » Logged

Kleel's rule is harsh :-B
zombie #1
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema

Karma: 396
Posts: 2939


« Reply #1 on: September 12, 2013, 03:27:10 AM »

Not heard of it, but the whole 'found footage' thing needs to disappear now imo. At least for a while. It's a craze that's seemingly been going non-stop since Blair Witch. Time to give it a rest...
« Last Edit: September 12, 2013, 03:29:35 AM by zombie #1 » Logged

"A whale's throat and blow hole are not connected, therefore escape is impossible.  "
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