Recent Viewings, Part 2

[Jim H]

Paper Tigers - This was topping Netflix for a while and has really good reviews.  It's not bad, but I don't really get the level of reviews and apparently attention it's getting.  It's an OK kung fu film set in America, but still having a plot akin to an old one (disciples must avenge dead master type thing).  But, it's really light weight.  There's some decent performances, the martial sequences are pretty well-handled, I like how they kind of modernized some old tropes a bit, and Matthew Page in a supporting role is quite funny...  But, I dunno, the main plot is thin, the villain barely exists in the film, the drama of the lead character and his family isn't that interesting or satisfying, or the back and forth stuff about legacy, and it just feels cheap in a way that's hard to put your finger on, but a lot of Netflix originals have. 

Overall, 6/10.

The Net - This is a bad movie, but it's a fun and entertaining one.  Sandra Bullock carries the film quite handily.  6/10.

The Losers - Should have been better, how do you manage to largely waste Idris Elba, Chris Evans, Jeffrey Dean Morgan AND Zoe Saldana?  But none of them stick out much and only Chris Evans gets a few moments to shine.  Bland, mediocre, not very interesting, and obviously trimmed and shot to just barely get a PG13 for better box office (which failed anyways).  4/10.

[Rev. Powell]

TICKLES THE CLOWN (2021): OK, this one's going to take a bit of explanation, but here goes. The plot is its 2000 years in the future, the Illuminati (who are aliens) have taken over Earth, and there's this imprisonec sociopathic clown super-criminal whose blood has a genetic marker the good guys need to make a serum to kill the aliens but he won't give them a sample and for stupid reasons they can't take his blood by force so this female resistance leader tries to convince him to give a blood sample. It's basically SILENCE OF THE LAMBS meets STAR WARS with clowns and Illuminati (and also a jive-talking Bigfoot). They whole thing is animated like a passable video game: characters repeat the same movement and their lips don't match the words; it's almost all dialogue with action happening offscreen. It's also part of a series and we come in in the middle with some long-running subplots just suggested. This guy has made a bunch of these with titles like TRUMP VS. THE ILLUMINATI and BIGFOOT VS. THE ILLUMINATI, but he just sells them on somewhat expensive DVDs, so no one ever sees them. Extremely psychotronic and would be worthy of its own thread, except that no one else will probably see this because of the poor distribution. 1.5/5 (you might go higher because of the oddity/curiosity factor, but in terms of moviemaking talent, this rating is inflated).

[FatFreddysCat]

"Bad Teacher" (2010)
After being dumped by her rich fiancee, a lazy, unqualified woman (Cameron Diaz) takes a teaching job to pay the bills while she seeks out a new "sugar daddy."
Diaz is great (and super hot) in this raunchy comedy that takes all the cliches of "teacher movies" and turns them sideways -- her character doesn't suddenly get inspired and become a Super Teacher, she's only staying in the class so she can afford a boob job! :D

[FatFreddysCat]

"Kingpin" (1996)
A disgraced, one handed former bowling champ (Woody Harrelson) takes a skilled, but naive Amish man (Randy Quaid) under his wing and trains him to take part in a million-dollar tournament in Reno against his old rival (Bill Murray).
This slapstick road trip / sports flick from the Farrelly Bros. (of "Dumb & Dumber" fame) is mean spirited, tasteless, and over-the-top ridiculous, but it's also funny as hell. Harrelson is a p**ser as the down-on-his-luck, drunken "champ," and Murray almost steals the movie with his small, but pivotal, role.
"Kingpin" may not be for everybody, but it's my second favorite sports comedy, right behind "Caddyshack."

[pennywise37]

wow bad Teacher is 11 years old? i did not realize that it feels like it just came the f... out ya know?   i still haven't seen that or the tv show that later came out even though the show flopped.

i watched the 1st Harry Potter films since i am reading the last books i dunno why but when i watch a film that i love that's based off a book it helps me keep my mind on the book i can finish it i dunno why that is but it just is i guess.

[Dr. Whom]

THE Suicide Squad (2021)

This one is a hoot! The previous Suicide Squad (without THE) wasn't as bad as it was sometimes made out to be, but as I said elsewhere on this forum, it tried to be several movies at once, so the sum was less than its parts. Add to that a scenario that was very much by the numbers (including the pillar of light with a whirly thing on top that threathens the world) and you get a very disappointing movie.

This one just tries to be entertaining, and takes all the cartoony fun and violence of the genre and turns it up to eleven. James Gunn has fun with the tropes and conventions of the superhero movie and wastes no time with subplots or grounding the story. It is also surprisingly gory. If you can't stand the sight of blood, this is no movie for you. Also, rather less characters than expected survive at the end of the movie. It is not Rogue One, but still.

On a sidenote, I suppose Corto Maltese is a nod to Hugo Pratt, but it is difficult to think of a movie that is further removed from the spirit of Hugo Pratt's comic than this one.

[FatFreddysCat]

A DC Comics double feature tonight:

A DC Comics double feature tonight:

"Joker" (2019)
Todd "The Hangover" Philips' bleak take on the super-villain's origin story is pretty much Taxi Driver set in the DC Universe, as a mentally-ill loser (Joaquin Phoenix) slowly loses his s**t amidst the chaos of Gotham City circa 1981. This was my 2nd viewing of this movie and it still packs a punch.

"Jonah Hex" (2010)
DC's Old West bounty hunter (Josh Brolin) battles against a terrorist (John Malkovich) who is planning to aim a super weapon at Washington DC on the eve of America's Centennial in this notorious box office bomb. As a shoot'em up, blow'em up action flick this wasn't terrible, but Jonah is a cool character and he deserved better than this confused muddle.

[Rev. Powell]

MAD GOD (2021): An "assassin" (so says the credits) explores a stop-motion animated Hell. The lifelong passion project of special effects star Phil Tippett (STAR WARS, JURASSIC PARK), who worked for three decades on this Boschian surrealist horror. It always impresses and often disgusts (with surgeons graphically slicing their way through corpses looking for treasure and squirming parasite babies)---but it may go on for too long, considering it's over an hour of plotless tortures, alien occult rituals, and psychedelic freakouts. 3.5/5.

[FatFreddysCat]

A double shot of trashy '80s horror on a rainy day:

"Humongous" (1982)
A group of boating twenty somethings on a lake outing run aground on a seemingly deserted private island, but they soon learn they're not alone, as a hulking, deformed something or other starts hunting them down one by one. Pretty standard Canuck slasher/horror junk, not terrible, not great.

"Rats: Night of Terror" (aka "Blood Kill," 1984)
225 years after a nuclear apocalypse, a gang of nomadic bikers stumble into a deserted laboratory building full of food, water, and other supplies. They think they've hit the jackpot but the place is also infested with hordes of super-intelligent, extremely hungry rats, who don't take kindly to trespassers on their turf.
This gloriously stupid Italian sci-fi/horror mash up directed by notorious schlock meister Bruno Mattei (of "Hell of the Living Dead," "RoboWar," and "Shocking Dark" fame) has all the usual hallmarks of Spaghetti cinema: cheap gore, atrocious dubbing, a muddled story full of plot holes, and terrible, mugging over-acting. It's crap, but it's entertaining crap.

[Jim H]

Midnight Special - I like Jeff Nichols (Take Shelter is really good), but this one didn't gel for me.  It feels like a pretty good idea for a 20 minute short, but instead it approaches 2 hours with nothing extra to show for it.  It's a quasi superhero sci fi film, as an origin story, but has little of the excitement.  Good acting and well shot, OK characters, just way, way overlong and never comes together.  5/10.

Kingdom: Ashin of the North - Prequel film to the Kingdom series.  Mostly a revenge story with some zombies near the end.  It's alright, but could have easily been compressed into a standard Kingdom episode length and would have been stronger for it.  5/10.

City of the Living Dead - It's a Fulci film.  This one is kind of middle of the road.  Some nice atmosphere with alright score, but as usual for his films from Zombie on, barely coherent with horribly written characters.  Some decent gore, but the "dead" characters often look terrible in this, Zombie's makeup is masterful in comparison.  I don't even know how to properly rate a Fulci film like this, you'll probably know if you want to see it.  5/10.

Fear Street trilogy - a series of Netflix originals based on RL Stine's book series.  I read Goosebumps, but never the Fear Street books.  That said, I doubt they had as much murder as this one.  The first is way too fast paced and choppy, going from scene to scene and thin character to thin character super fast.  But it's not boring.  It has some surprisingly gory bits too.  But it's not amazing.  It also cribs bits from It Follows and some other more recent horror films, but is never as good as any of them.  It's OK.  Parts 2 and 3 focus in more and are the stronger films for it, but they're never that good.  All told, I'd rate them a 5, 6 and 6.

[FatFreddysCat]

"Stage Fright" (aka "Deliria," aka "Stage Fright: Aquarius," 1987)
The cast and crew of an artsy stage musical are locked inside their theater overnight with a psycho killer, who proceeds to pick them off one by one.
An Italian take on the slasher film formula, directed by Argento protege' Michael Soavi (later of "The Church" and "Cemetery Man" fame). It's a nice looking film in that slick "'80s new wave music video" kind of way and there's some legit gore, but the acting and dialogue is stiff and awkward, and the characters are all so shrill, stupid and annoying that they deserve everything that happens to them.
If you must see every slasher film ever made, go nuts. Otherwise, you're not missing anything if you skip this.

[FatFreddysCat]

"Opera" (aka "Terror at the Opera," 1987)
Dario Argento's giallo/slasher hybrid about a young opera singer pursued by an obsessed fan, who forces her to watch as he murders everyone close to her.
As usual for Unca Dario, the movie is an uneven blend of highbrow European arthouse and lowbrow, gory grindhouse. The movie is beautifully shot and packed with eye candy, and the murder scenes are gloriously gross... but the sluggish pacing, awkward dialogue/dubbing and unnecessary "WTF?" plot twists turned this into a slog. I guess I'll stick to "Suspiria" or "Inferno" when I'm in the mood for an Argento.

[Rev. Powell]

EVANGELION 3.33: YOU CAN (NOT) REDO (2012): The third of four films in Hideaki Anno's Evangelion reboot finds teen protagonist Shinji waking from a fourteen year coma to find the world nearly destroyed from the "third impact," with the fourth impact about to come. If you've seen the series you know what to expect: awesome mecha battles, psychedelic animation, apocalyptic imagery, and the confusion of Anno's impossible-to-follow personal mythology; this is more of the same, mainly serving as a set-up for the final act. 3/5.

[FatFreddysCat]

"Jason Rising: A Friday the 13th Fan Film" (2021)
Two small town cops and a pair of Federal marshals track a trio of escaped convicts to the ruins of Camp Crystal Lake, where they meet its most famous hockey-masked resident. You can probably figure out how well that goes.
This is a very well made fan film with legit production values, some nice gore effects, and halfway decent acting. At just under an hour, it doesn't wear out its welcome, plus there's a surprise late-inning appearance by a major character from the 'real' "Friday the 13th" saga. This is definitely one of the best "F13" fan films out there, right behind Never Hike Alone. Good stuff!

[pennywise37]

i don't normally watch the fan films i have hard time sitting through them, the videos that were on the bluray of the Original films some of them were pretty hard to sit through, some of them the story was pretty decent than the ending was f... terrible at least i thought so anyways.

though i'm still watching it i had to pause it for a moment i'm watching Red (2010) i saw it on the big screen back than and i have both of them on bluray and i lvoe these films. they are so worth watching the 2nd one while good is not as good as the 1st one which is just Brilliant.